Sexy Celebrity's Movie Commentaries!

[Sexy Celebrity]

http://www.movieforums.com/community/attachment.php?attachmentid=11371&stc=1&d=1379661503

http://www.movieforums.com/community/attachment.php?attachmentid=11372&stc=1&d=1379661532

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ri7O3o1fsRc

[Miss Vicky]

I don't get your Monkee love.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Actually, that clip sucks. Audio out of sync.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BQlpQ2TBFg8

Watch this. It's funny.

[Miss Vicky]

Nope. Still don't get it.

[Sexy Celebrity]

You have to watch all of it! Let it absorb.

[Miss Vicky]

I'm absorbing Lindsey Buckingham photos right now.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I thought you were going to tell me to absorb Quills.

[Miss Vicky]

You do need to do that.

[honeykid]

Who is that?

How come there isn't a dwarf bowling reality show?

I should look this up online and see if dwarf bowling is real.

I can't believe you asked MV who Lindsey Buckingham was. That's like asking me who drew is. Well, nearly.

And then you didn't know dwarf bowling wasn't a thing. Where have you been? :eek:

[Miss Vicky]

I can't believe you asked MV who Lindsey Buckingham was. That's like asking me who drew is. Well, nearly.

I know, right? It's like he doesn't even know me at all.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I wasn't asking WHO Lindsey Buckingham is.

She put up a PICTURE of Lindsey Buckingham and I had no idea who THAT was. Especially OLD Lindsey Buckingham.

I did not recognize the person in the picture. Just like that time here when I didn't recognize Anne Frank in a picture and it got me in trouble.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Honeykid, have you seen Walking and Talking?

[Miss Vicky]

I'm about ready for a movie if you are. Just need a minute to get my netbook set up.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Let me put up the poster and then give me 2 minutes or so.

[Sexy Celebrity]

TONIGHT...

http://www.movieforums.com/community/attachment.php?attachmentid=11373&stc=1&d=1379735591

http://www.movieforums.com/community/attachment.php?attachmentid=11374&stc=1&d=1379735595

Miss Vicky will meet...

THE MISTRESS

[rauldc14]

A movie has never looked so awful....

[Miss Vicky]

I'm here. Hopefull Netflix will work okay. It took forever to load the movie I was watching earlier.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Press play.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Raul, are you watching, too?

[Miss Vicky]

Play pressed. Loaded semi quickly

[Sexy Celebrity]

Open on a black and white horror movie.

[Miss Vicky]

spoke too soon. it went back to the loading screen for a secon.d

now black and white scene. Blonde facing a monster

[Miss Vicky]

burning eye. crappy looking monster.

[Miss Vicky]

Elvira has huge... ratings.

and the site's being a bitch. I'm expecting a database error soon.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Where are you at?

[Sexy Celebrity]

Maybe we should pause the movie?

[Miss Vicky]

she's meeting mr. hooter

[Sexy Celebrity]

I don't want this site ruining this movie. Not this one.

[Miss Vicky]

she needs a job like a leper needs a three way mirror.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I'm already feeling stressed and I don't like feeling stressed.

[Miss Vicky]

It's your call, Sexy.

[Sexy Celebrity]

And Elvira talks too damn fast.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Site seems to be working now.

[Miss Vicky]

She's going to have to find another sleazeball.

[Miss Vicky]

Her great aunt is dead. she's inheriting something.

[Miss Vicky]

Let's show Elvira exactly what she's inherited.

My god this movie is cheesy.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Can't believe you haven't seen this film.

[Miss Vicky]

Really? Does it seem like my kind of movie to you, Sexy?

[Sexy Celebrity]

She's in her car.

[Sexy Celebrity]

It's funny... it's outrageous....

[Miss Vicky]

Her license plate says Kickass. And she's picking up a creepy hitchhiker.

Thanks for the ride lady.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Here! You forgot your axe! *throws axe*

[Sexy Celebrity]

Police officer stops her. She shows off cleavage.

[Miss Vicky]

She's got a glove box full of speeding tickets.

[Sexy Celebrity]

This gas station attendant guy is Jambi the Genie from Pee Wee's Playhouse.

[Miss Vicky]

Gas station is self serve. Gas station attendant is dirty and ugly.

[Sexy Celebrity]

He's Elvira's co-writer with a lot of her stuff.

[Miss Vicky]

Boobs on windshield. I'm not impressed.

[Sexy Celebrity]

He wrote some Elvira young adult books back in the '90s that featured Elvira. They were pretty good.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Hot dog in the breasts.

[Miss Vicky]

I want a hot dog. But not the one on her ****.

[Sexy Celebrity]

She pulls into town, all badass.

[Miss Vicky]

Hood just flew off.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Edie McClurg in hair rollers.

[Miss Vicky]

You certainly don't fit in this town. You don't even fit in that dress.

[Sexy Celebrity]

"Anita! It's the Anti-Christ, I tell you!"

[Miss Vicky]

Hideous outfits on those guys.

[Miss Vicky]

Nice t!ts.

[Sexy Celebrity]

*ding ding ding ding ding*

"I'd hate to INTERRUPT this little episode of THE WALTONS, but CAN I GET A ROOM?!"

[Miss Vicky]

I know what you pino heavy metal weirdos do to motel rooms.

[Miss Vicky]

The bowling alley gets real wild on league night.

[Miss Vicky]

More ugly dudes.

[Sexy Celebrity]

That waitress Elvira just talked to is Miss Yvonne from Pee Wee's Playhouse.

[Miss Vicky]

Do you want a virgin?

Maybe, but I'll have a couple of drinks first.

[Sexy Celebrity]

"So... how about a blowjob?"

[Miss Vicky]

I've got something to show you.

I left my magnifying glass at home.

[Miss Vicky]

Bob Redding is not hot.

[Miss Vicky]

That chicks **** are really pointy.

[Sexy Celebrity]

"You better WATCH OUT. You could POKE somebody's EYES out with THEM THINGS."

[Miss Vicky]

She thinks she's classy. I disagree.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Bob is HOT!

"Trash DOES NOT COMPETE WITH CLASS."

[Miss Vicky]

He can only play g rated movies.

[Miss Vicky]

Gee, that'd be swell. :rolleyes:

[Sexy Celebrity]

"Nothing wrong with G rated movies as long as there's LOTS OF SEX AND VIOLENCE."

Kinda how I feel about this website.

[Miss Vicky]

Hey guys, sorry I'm late. But then, so is my aunt.

[Sexy Celebrity]

"WHO is THIS WOMAN?!"

[Sexy Celebrity]

They hardly got any money.

[Miss Vicky]

she got the house, the dog, and recipes.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Vincent is pissed.

He wants... the recipe book.

[Miss Vicky]

Where's Bob Eubanks?

[Miss Vicky]

She needs a house in Falwell like she needs a padded bra.

[Sexy Celebrity]

She'll do it for 50 bucks.

[Miss Vicky]

She'll do it for fifty bucks.

[Miss Vicky]

The next thing you know they're passing out condoms to kindergarteners.

[Miss Vicky]

She can't stand nelly little dogs.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Her house needs a WRECKING BALL.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=My2FRPA3Gf8

[Miss Vicky]

Does a chicken have a pecker?

[Sexy Celebrity]

Gonk has been transformed.

[Miss Vicky]

I didn't think it was possible to make a poodle uglier than it naturally is. I was wrong.

[Sexy Celebrity]

You think poodles are ugly?

[Miss Vicky]

yes, I do.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Time for the boys to watch an Elvira strip show.

'Cause this was the '80s and they didn't have the Internet.

[Sexy Celebrity]

The trusty old Polaroid camera.

[Miss Vicky]

She's stripping. ugly dudes are taking pictures.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Elvira became a Smurf.

[LP Quagmire]

Let's show Elvira exactly what she's inherited.

My god this movie is cheesy.


Cheesy yes, but in a good way.

[Miss Vicky]

Giant ass in the screen. Not hot.

Grab a tool and start banging.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Grab a tool and start banging!

[Sexy Celebrity]

Maybe I picked a bad movie for Miss Vicky.

[Miss Vicky]

Clothes that couldn't keep a titmouse dry in a drizzle.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Writhing around to that JUNGLE MUSIC.

[Miss Vicky]

She's a one woman sodom and gommorah.

[Sexy Celebrity]

a SLIMY, SLITHERING SUCCUBUS!

[Miss Vicky]

She'd do anything to get rid of that rat trap.

[LP Quagmire]

They made a sequel, ELVIRA'S HAUNTED HILLS...

[Sexy Celebrity]

This movie is nothing but BOOBS.

It's like Nebbit: The Movie.

[Miss Vicky]

realtor guy is ready to burst

[Sexy Celebrity]

Wait just a second. Pause.

[Sexy Celebrity]

My DVD player just shut off by itself. It's LP Quagmire's fault.

[Sexy Celebrity]

They made a sequel, ELVIRA'S HAUNTED HILLS...

It's HORRIBLE. I hate that one.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Where are you in the movie?

[LP Quagmire]

My DVD player just shut off by itself. It's LP Quagmire's fault.


Thanks for giving credit where credit is due. :)

[Miss Vicky]

sorry i missed the cue to pause.where should I be?

[Miss Vicky]

ugly dudes were in the house eating her underwear and gonk chased them out.

[Sexy Celebrity]

It died on me when the realtor guy was at her house.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Pick a place and I'll go to it.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Sorry.

[Miss Vicky]

okay back there now. should I unpause?

[Sexy Celebrity]

Yeah

[Sexy Celebrity]

what are they doing?

[LP Quagmire]

According to Box Office Mojo, this film had the 3,945th biggest opening weekend in box office history. :p

[Miss Vicky]

she's on the phone with the old dude who won't calm down. Nobody came to the open house.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Alrighty. There.

[Miss Vicky]

she's looking for a job. nobody will hire her.

[Sexy Celebrity]

"And NOW I hear she is out LOOKING FOR A JOB! :eek:"

[Miss Vicky]

They're eating her panties again. Gonk's shadow looks like a rottweiler.

[LP Quagmire]

she's looking for a job. nobody will hire her.

Her last job was a boob job.

[Miss Vicky]

Bob Redding dropped a letter on her.

[Miss Vicky]

How's your head?

I haven't had any complaints yet.

[Sexy Celebrity]

This movie does seem more cheesy than I remembered it.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I don't think it'll be making the '80s list.

[Sexy Celebrity]

This poor movie. So unappreciated.

[Sexy Celebrity]

And this commentary feels cursed. It's not going as well as last night's.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I fear Miss Vicky is bored to tears.

[Sexy Celebrity]

And I'm about to hit 20,000 posts.

[Miss Vicky]

two days ago we were bosom buddies.

[Miss Vicky]

Not quite to tears.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I thought you would love this. I thought this would be the best movie I showed you.

[Miss Vicky]

I was more than just a great set of boobs.

[Miss Vicky]

I thought you would love this. I thought this would be the best movie I showed you.

I guess you predicted my taste in movies about as well I predicted yours.

It's not the worst movie I've ever seen, not by a lot, but definitely not my cup of tea.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I almost suggested Leprechaun 2. I guess I was in a corny mood tonight.

Bob has a hot ass.

[Miss Vicky]

Guaranteed standing ovulation.

[LP Quagmire]

I don't think it'll be making the '80s list.

Still hope for the sequel to make the 2000's list...

http://img594.imageshack.us/img594/5814/eoh3.jpg (http://imageshack.us/photo/my-images/594/eoh3.jpg/)

Uploaded with ImageShack.us (http://imageshack.us)

[Sexy Celebrity]

"They're Italian. They'll wind up making a GREAT MARINARA SAUCE."

[Miss Vicky]

Oh god poofy curly hair pulled to the side. Definitely eighties.

[Sexy Celebrity]

"The BEST is YET TO COME."

[Sexy Celebrity]

She has DANCED into the DANGER ZONE... when the DANCER BECOMES THE DANCE.

[Miss Vicky]

Tarred and feathered.

[Miss Vicky]

Here's to her big opening.

[Sexy Celebrity]

20,000TH POST!!!!

"Well... here's to my BIG OPENING!"

[Miss Vicky]

this is like a drag queen movie without drag queens.

[Miss Vicky]

it's just slut queen with big ****.

[Sexy Celebrity]

this is like a drag queen movie without drag queens.

It really is.

[Sexy Celebrity]

All my movies deal with drag queens. Even Walking and Talking had a line about Anne Heche looking like a drag queen.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Have you seen Tootsie? You need to see Tootsie before you turn in your '80s list.

[Miss Vicky]

Apparently edrezeba is nightcrawlers.

[Sexy Celebrity]

You knew what kind of worms that was??

[Miss Vicky]

I haven't seen Tootsie. Dustin Hoffman in drag has never appealed to me.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I haven't seen Tootsie. Dustin Hoffman in drag has never appealed to me.

*gasp*

[Sexy Celebrity]

It's SOUP!

[Miss Vicky]

You knew what kind of worms that was??

Yes. My dad goes fishing a lot. they're often used as bait.

[Miss Vicky]

Dinner is trying to eat them. To some really godawful music.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I don't go fishing... though I have fished. To me, Nightcrawler is an X-Men character.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Damn, look at that ass on Bob as he runs.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Elvira finds a letter with her name on it.

"Think it's for me?"

[Sexy Celebrity]

Hope we're not getting a database error.

[Miss Vicky]

baby elvira was even more frightening then grown up elvira.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I apologize. Site's acting slow... and you're watching this. Even though I think it's fabulous.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I know, I was gonna say something about Baby Elvira.

[Miss Vicky]

gorgeous snake.

[Sexy Celebrity]

You're really into animals.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Tic Tac Pie.

[Miss Vicky]

If I can make it all the way through this, you can finish Quills.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Revenge is BETTER THAN CHRISTMAS!

[Sexy Celebrity]

But Quills is nothing like this. How will I survive?

[Sexy Celebrity]

I WANT that FOOD.

[Miss Vicky]

You're really into animals.

This is news? I'd never own a snake though, I'd never be able to feed it.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I'd even eat that hot dog taco.

[Miss Vicky]

But Quills is nothing like this. How will I survive?

You're right. Quills is actually good.

[Miss Vicky]

I'll get you and your little dog, too.

[Miss Vicky]

Pointy **** is jealous.

[Miss Vicky]

and topless.

[Sexy Celebrity]

She's not so pointy anymore.

[Miss Vicky]

He's suggesting a witch trial.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Vincent appears to have a lazy eye.

[Miss Vicky]

she's seen people's court. she gets one phone call and a strip search.

[Miss Vicky]

I bet sexy's loving bob running back and forth like that

[Sexy Celebrity]

This movie really is a marvel compared to Elvira's second movie, which came out in 2001. I can't stand it.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I bet sexy's loving bob running back and forth like that

You guessed right.

[Miss Vicky]

D'aww Gonk's a rat now. He should stay like that. No more fug poodle.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Gonk just became one of your favorite animals.

[Miss Vicky]

the priest is mr. grabby hands.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I actually couldn't figure out if he was a rat or a mouse.

[Miss Vicky]

gonk's a rottweiler now. damn.

[Miss Vicky]

I actually couldn't figure out if he was a rat or a mouse.

He's a rat. Mice are much smaller. And evil.

[Sexy Celebrity]

"Do you smoke?"

"GUESS WE'LL FIND OUT SOON ENOUGH."

[Sexy Celebrity]

Why do you think mice are evil?

[Miss Vicky]

Any last words?

Just one. AAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

[Sexy Celebrity]

"We ought to have one of these every year!"

[Miss Vicky]

Why do you think mice are evil?


I've had them. They tend to bite. They don't tame down nearly as well as rats and they smell terrible.

[Sexy Celebrity]

These people are sick. Elvira casts a spell that just makes everyone horny and they want to kill her!

[Miss Vicky]

creepy baby elvira again.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Down came the rain and washed the Elvira out.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Creepy Baby Elvira sees into your soul.

[Sexy Celebrity]

"Elviiiiiiiiiiraaaaaaaaaa!!!!"

[Sexy Celebrity]

Pigs.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Vincent's wearing a ring. That's very drag queen.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Elvira's being chased by AN OLD QUEEN!

[Miss Vicky]

Her dress just got much shorter.

[Sexy Celebrity]

"You looking for me?"

BOOM!

*blows*

[Sexy Celebrity]

High Heel to the Forehead!

Drag Queen Violence!

[Miss Vicky]

Really? stabbed in the forehead with a stiletto heel?

[Miss Vicky]

I am master of the dark.

[Sexy Celebrity]

"I... am... MASTER...of...THE DARK!"

[Sexy Celebrity]

The severed hand should have went after Elvira's breasts.

[Miss Vicky]

and now, Elvira, YOU DIE!!!

Don't I wish.

[Sexy Celebrity]

She carries the power WITH HER!

[Sexy Celebrity]

Her policy doesn't cover ACTS OF DEMONS!

[Miss Vicky]

bob and gonk are in neck braces. the house is burned.

[Miss Vicky]

the townsfolk are coming for her.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Elvira's like FAKE FRUIT. She doesn't bruise that easy!

[Miss Vicky]

You touched a part of my son that nobody's ever touched before.

[Miss Vicky]

This ending is WAY more cheesy than the ending to Wong Foo.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Patti's flat chested now.

[Miss Vicky]

And Patrick Swayze made for a more attractive woman than Elvira.

[Sexy Celebrity]

This ending is WAY more cheesy than the ending to Wong Foo.

Same kind of ending, but not as cheesy.

[Miss Vicky]

She's going to Las Vegas now. She is the kind of girl whose dreams come true.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Now watch this part.

[Miss Vicky]

Now she REALLY looks like a drag queen.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Suddenly, it's a Priscilla, Queen of the Desert kind of ending.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I want one of her dancing devils.

[Miss Vicky]

Not a fan of tarantulas.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I love how she crashes through that picture of herself.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Now for the grand finale.

Her MILKSHAKE.

[Miss Vicky]

Now she's got tassles on her ****.

[Sexy Celebrity]

In case you didn't get a really good look at her breasts during the movie.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Bob's all excited for her.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Unpleasant Dreams....

[Miss Vicky]

Unpleasant dreams.

[Sexy Celebrity]

4

[Miss Vicky]

Credits roll.

2-

Way too cheesy.

[Miss Vicky]

Also none of the men turned me on. None of the women either.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Movies I've Done Commentary For
Funny Games (1997)
Night of the Demons (1988)
Serial Mom
Caligula
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
Apollo 13
The Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2
Young Guns
Scream 2
Beetlejuice (with Miss Vicky)
Dahmer
Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot
Sleepaway Camp II: Unhappy Campers
Men at Work (with Miss Vicky)
The Place Beyond the Pines
Mrs. Doubtfire (as Samantha Claire)
Ghostbusters (with Psychic Isaac)
Signs (with Miss Vicky)
Hedwig and the Angry Inch (with Miss Vicky)
Independence Day (with rauldc14)
Hellraiser
Die Hard (with Miss Vicky)
The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert (with Miss Vicky)
Encino Man (with Miss Vicky and rauldc14)
Platoon (with Miss Vicky)
Creepshow 2 (with Miss Vicky)
To Wong Foo, Thanks for Everything, Julie Newmar (with Miss Vicky)
Girls Will Be Girls (with Miss Vicky)
Saved! (with Miss Vicky)
Clay Pigeons (with Miss Vicky)
Rain Man (with rauldc14)
Party Monster (with Miss Vicky)
Walking and Talking (with Miss Vicky)
Elvira, Mistress of the Dark (with Miss Vicky)

[Sexy Celebrity]

See, I thought maybe Elvira might turn you on.

[Miss Vicky]

I'm not into fake boobs. Or women that look like drag queens.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Oh, that's right. Of course. Stupid me. You like those mannish women, like whats her name. Lori Petty. What was I thinking?

[Miss Vicky]

I only like Lori Petty in Point Break. And she doesn't look "mannish."

[Sexy Celebrity]

http://24.media.tumblr.com/78734396b42c4eea73ca8d1551ad272e/tumblr_mqif83tL1L1qzbwhlo1_250.gifhttp://24.media.tumblr.com/78734396b42c4eea73ca8d1551ad272e/tumblr_mqif83tL1L1qzbwhlo1_250.gifhttp://24.media.tumblr.com/78734396b42c4eea73ca8d1551ad272e/tumblr_mqif83tL1L1qzbwhlo1_250.gif

[Miss Vicky]

:indifferent:

[LP Quagmire]

This ending is WAY more cheesy than the ending to Wong Foo.

TO WONG FOO'S ending is rather touching.