Sexy Celebrity's Movie Commentaries!

[Miss Vicky]

Oh, this scene. Ha. Joaquin's a miracle man.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I think Yoda might have interviewed M. Night. Yoda -- I don't know if he still runs it -- but he used to run an M. Night site. Hell, it might have even been the official M. Night site. Maybe not. But he used to run something like mnight.com. And I remember him doing an interview or something.

[Sexy Celebrity]

MNIGHT.com still exists and it looks like Yoda's work.

[Miss Vicky]

I think this and The Village are the only M Night movies I own. I've also seen The Sixth Sense, which was okay and Lady in the Water, which was terrible.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I'd like to watch Lady in the Water again. I like that Paul Giamatti.

[Sexy Celebrity]

M. Night secures hot guys for his films.

[Miss Vicky]

Joaquin's story, the gum saved him. he's a miracle man.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I don't feel totally into this movie... maybe we should have done I'm Still Here.

[Miss Vicky]

Paul Giamatti is so not hot. Not hot at all.

[Sexy Celebrity]

But I am thinking of a lot to talk about in regards to it.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I think Paul's hot. But I have strange tastes.

[Miss Vicky]

I think Paul's hot. But I have strange tastes.

yeah, I'd say so.

[Miss Vicky]

There is no one watching out for us. We are all on our own.

[Miss Vicky]

Joaquin makes a hotter priest than Mel.

[Sexy Celebrity]

That's gotta be a very sad and emotional dream. When you wake up from someone saying something like that -- I just know from my experiences with dreams that it's gonna be very emotional.

[Miss Vicky]

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_lEeR2OMliho/SXoFfB1UA1I/AAAAAAAACsw/6p-G28fJ3fM/s400/joaquin_quills.jpg

[Sexy Celebrity]

Joaquin's in the closet.

[Sexy Celebrity]

You like pretty boys. I was thinking earlier that Joaquin's face looks kinda feminine here.

[Miss Vicky]

My dreams never seem emotional. They're just ***ed up. Freud would have a field day with them.

[Miss Vicky]

What the hell is furry furry rabbit?

[Sexy Celebrity]

He has kind of that Michael Hutchence look as a priest.

[Miss Vicky]

Joaquin is not pretty.

[Miss Vicky]

I love his scar. Imperfections are hot.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I can't remember what I've been dreaming lately. It distresses me.

[Sexy Celebrity]

YES, I do think his ... hairlip ... is hot.

[Miss Vicky]

so the aliens can't read our minds.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I used to know someone with a hairlip like that.

[Miss Vicky]

Dr. Bimboo says so.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I think Joaquin looks kinda pretty.

[Sexy Celebrity]

He doesn't have ... a kind of hard edge, ultra masculine look like Mel.

[Miss Vicky]

that looks like our house.

[Miss Vicky]

Mel has an ultra masculine look?

[Miss Vicky]

That's enough from Dr. Bimboo for now.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I think so. I dunno. As a gay man who looks at men all the time, that's how I would categorize it.

Mel looks like... "a real man." Joaquin is more pretty.

[Miss Vicky]

Dr. M. Night Shyamalan, DVM just called. All he said was "Father."

[Sexy Celebrity]

Joaquin would make a more attractive woman. Mel wouldn't.

[Miss Vicky]

They'd both be fugly women.

[Miss Vicky]

Even I wouldn't do Joaq then.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Only problem Joaquin has with transforming himself into a woman is the hairlip.

[Miss Vicky]

The knife and alien finger scene. Another one that made me jump.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I would. A hot man dressed as a woman is still a hot man.

[Miss Vicky]

Joaq claims it's not a hairlip. Just a scar he was born with. Never had an actual cleft pallatte.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I did not know that.

I wonder what M. Night looks like naked. I like those Indian men.

[Miss Vicky]

Then again he likes to mess with the press. you never know what's true with him.

[Miss Vicky]

M. Night is not hot. Nor can he act.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I like doing commentaries with you because I can talk like this to you. I don't think I can talk like this with Raul when we do our commentary.

[Miss Vicky]

He does have nice lips, though.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I like Joaquin's shirt here when he's watching TV. I always wanted a shirt like this.

[Miss Vicky]

yeah I don't see Raul commenting on how do-able the male actors are.

[Miss Vicky]

more jumpy scenes.

[Miss Vicky]

alien coming out of bushes = Miss vicky jumped all three times in the theater

[Miss Vicky]

Move Children! Vamanos!

[Sexy Celebrity]

I think Raul and I are gonna watch Independence Day.

I'll have to stifle any feelings I might have for Jeff Goldblum.

[Miss Vicky]

lol

[Sexy Celebrity]

Vamanos!

[Miss Vicky]

paddywagon. lol

[Sexy Celebrity]

Joaquin speaking spanish -- like me when I spoke spanish in class as Joaquin.

[Miss Vicky]

I don't think I or my mom have ID4 or i might join you two.

[Mmmm Donuts]

What's going on here? I feel like I'm intruding on some pagan ritual, which will end with me being burned alive in a giant wicker man.

[Miss Vicky]

all we did in spanish class was watch movies and eat burritos.

[Sexy Celebrity]

God, you know... I used to love this movie, but something about it isn't so exciting to me tonight.

[Sexy Celebrity]

This is absolutely a Pagan ritual.

[Miss Vicky]

I saw the first Toy Story for the first time in Spanish class. Also The Lion King.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I don't remember watching anything in particular in my spanish class... the only thing I remember watching is Veggie Tales for some reason.

[Miss Vicky]

I get that way with movies. Sometimes I'll watch an old favorite and just not be into it. Then try again awhile later and be enthralled.

[Miss Vicky]

tin foil hats!

[Sexy Celebrity]

Would you have sex with Joaquin if he had the tin foil on his head? What if he put it on his other head?

[Miss Vicky]

Yes. Yes I would.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Be right back.

[Miss Vicky]

he could have a foil hat on each head and i'd be fine with it.

[Mmmm Donuts]

Seems like an awkward silence is about to occur. This might be my only chance to escape!

[Sexy Celebrity]

Okay.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Urgh.

[Miss Vicky]

paused fo a sec due to site loading issues. They're about to board up the house because aliens seem to have trouble with pantry doors.

[Sexy Celebrity]

What was the first movie that really caught your attention with Joaquin?

[Miss Vicky]

Gladiator. Although I distinctly remember thinking it was a shame he was so damn creepy because he's a really talented actor.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I love chicken teriyaki.

Is Merrill supposed to be ... Mel Gibson's character's younger brother?

[Miss Vicky]

And then I saw Quills and was "ho lee shhhhhiittt. Dude's hot."

[Miss Vicky]

I love chicken teriyaki.

Is Merrill supposed to be ... Mel Gibson's character's younger brother?

yes.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I need to see Quills.

[Miss Vicky]

you haven't seen Quills????????????????????

[Sexy Celebrity]

*shakes head* No.

[Miss Vicky]

For shame!

[Sexy Celebrity]

Isn't it about Marquis de Sade?

[Miss Vicky]

Hot Joaquin. Hot Kate. Hot what's his name from True Blood. Hot (but underraged) Amelia Warner. Geoffrey Rush and Michael Caine being their awesome selves.

You must watch.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Alrighty.

[Miss Vicky]

Isn't it about Marquis de Sade?

Did you not read my write up in the Millenium List?

It is not about the Marquis de Sade.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I may not have. :p

[Sexy Celebrity]

Why did I think it was about Sade....

[Miss Vicky]

http://www.movieforums.com/community/showthread.php?p=846122

[Miss Vicky]

de Sade is a character in the story. It is not about him.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Oh, okay. I knew Sade was involved with it somehow.

[Miss Vicky]

They forgot about Isabel.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Wow, you even state in your review, "IT IS NOT ABOUT DE SADE."

[Miss Vicky]

bye bye doggie.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I will look for it and watch it soon. I need to start watching movies I haven't seen again and do some actual movie reviews instead of commentaries.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I've just been in a big "watch movies I've already seen" mood lately.

[Miss Vicky]

Even honeykid liked Quills. He finally watched it after me pestering him for four years.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Interesting dream theme in this movie.

[Miss Vicky]

Oh I know how that goes. I've done almost nothing but rewatches for months.

[Sexy Celebrity]

What do you think, Miss Vicky? Do you believe in "signs"?

[Miss Vicky]

Yeah, it's all about dreams and faith. Not something that should appeal to atheist Miss Vicky.

[Miss Vicky]

What do you think, Miss Vicky? Do you believe in "signs"?

No.

[Miss Vicky]

We forgot our foil helmets.

[Miss Vicky]

They'll know our secret thoughts.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I believe in signs. I believe in messages. Even if there's no God or we just don't understand what's going on.

[Miss Vicky]

If aliens read my secret thoughts, they'd uncover some f***ed up s***.

[Miss Vicky]

Maybe they wouldn't invade. They'd be like "uh, these creatures are freaks. This planet's already screwed. Let's move on."

[Miss Vicky]

I do believe in aliens, btw. Just not convinced they've ever come here.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Their thoughts may be a lot worse.

[Miss Vicky]

creepy alien hand coming up

[Sexy Celebrity]

Oh, I'm sure there's probably alien life out there. There's billions and billions of planets.

[Miss Vicky]

also I love how that one last can of dog food MUST go on the pile.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I think we may even meet alien life one day. Even if it seems impossible.

[Miss Vicky]

Graham feeds his dogs some pretty crappy food.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Oh, his name's Graham. Okay.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Yeah, there's something about Joaquin that looks womanly to me. Those thick, dark eyebrows....

[Miss Vicky]

Not that it matters. dogs are dead now.

[Miss Vicky]

Yeah, there's something about Joaquin that looks womanly to me. Those thick, dark eyebrows....

That's not "womanly" that's hot.

I love his dark, broody eyebrows over those gorgeous eyes.

[Miss Vicky]

Mel has similar eyes.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I dunno... I look at him, I sense something womanly. Vaguely.

[Miss Vicky]

you're weird.

[Miss Vicky]

more tragic memories.

"Tell Merrill... swing away."

[Sexy Celebrity]

Okay, yes, this police lady is a lesbian. I knew I had heard that somewhere. But it seems obvious to me, too. Like I can just pick up gaydar on her.

[Miss Vicky]

She's not hot, though.

[Sexy Celebrity]

He would probably make a great boyfriend, though -- Joaquin. I could see him being an actual boyfriend for me.

[Miss Vicky]

Joaquin found a pack of light bulbs.

[Sexy Celebrity]

No, she's not hot. She's mannish.

[Miss Vicky]

He would probably make a great boyfriend, though -- Joaquin. I could see him being an actual boyfriend for me.

he's very private about his relationships. The only person I know he's dated was Liv Tyler.

[Sexy Celebrity]

'Cause I usually date guys who have kind of a ... femme side to them. Gentle, sensitive. Maybe cause they're gay. So that's why I feel like Joaquin could be an actual boyfriend I'd have.

[Miss Vicky]

He usually brings his mom or a sister as his date to events.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I think he's a man whore like he was in I'm Still Here. I think he's probably ordering the prostitutes and thinking about what their buttholes smell like.

[Sexy Celebrity]

That may have been fiction -- MAYBE -- but I bet the way he played that character -- I bet there's some truth to it.

[Sexy Celebrity]

He seems like a freak. He seems like a wild guy. I was just thinking that he kinda reminds me of David Arquette, but more successful and more able to handle himself.

[Miss Vicky]

I don't think I want to know how much truth there was to I'm Still Here.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I loved I'm Still Here. It gets really boring fast, though, now, when I try to rewatch it. But I love it for what it is. I think it's very interesting. It makes me love Joaquin Phoenix.

[Miss Vicky]

alien in tv screen. Jumped again

[Sexy Celebrity]

I'm at the alien trying to poison the Culkin.

[Miss Vicky]

this is why any kind of horror/thriller type flick I don't like watching in theaters. It's embarrassing.

[Miss Vicky]

Swing away.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I love this ending. When all these thoughts come back to him -- and we see it all again. And he comes to his idea that saves them.

[Miss Vicky]

and now it all comes together. Merrill's baseball career and Graham's wife's instruction, Morgan's asthma, the little girl's water obsession...

Signs, signs, everywhere signs, blocking out the scenery, breaking my mind...

[Sexy Celebrity]

It's a miracle that he even thinks of this in time. I mean, it's just a movie, but I love how that happens. I don't believe in free will, so, now, I see this as -- even thinking of this in time is a miracle.

[Miss Vicky]

Is it possible there are no coincidences?

[Sexy Celebrity]

'Cause what if he didn't think of it? What if he didn't think back to what his dead wife said at the accident? They'd be screwed.

[Miss Vicky]

And the movie wouldn't be able to express its message about faith.

[Sexy Celebrity]

See, everything has meaning now -- "that's why he had asthma."

[Miss Vicky]

and morgan's fine because his lungs were closed from the asthma attack.

[Sexy Celebrity]

It's a very uplifting thing to feel like everything happens for a reason.

[Miss Vicky]

And...

Miss Vicky's still an atheist. And spent more time thinking how sexy Joaquin is then she did contemplating the movie's message.

[Sexy Celebrity]

The movie is very powerful if you accept the message. I'm not asking you to, I don't care, but it's definitely powerful when you believe in it.

[Miss Vicky]

It's a very uplifting thing to feel like everything happens for a reason.

On the flip side, it's anything but when ****ty things happen. And You're like "What the **** was the reason for this?"

[Sexy Celebrity]

The guy I dated when I first saw this -- he didn't care for this movie because he didn't believe in the message at all.

[Miss Vicky]

I love the movie and I appreciate what it's trying to say. But I don't agree with it.

[Sexy Celebrity]

On the flip side, it's anything but when ****ty things happen. And You're like "What the **** was the reason for this?"

Absolutely.

But those with faith in something -- I think -- I think they can, maybe, at least deal with it easier. Maybe at some point.

[Sexy Celebrity]

It's interesting though that you really love it but don't agree with it. I mean, I know it has Joaquin, but still.

[Miss Vicky]

It's interesting though that you really love it but don't agree with it. I mean, I know it has Joaquin, but still.

Trust me. Having Joaquin only means that I'll watch something. He's done some crap films.

[Miss Vicky]

Mind you, he wasn't crap in them, but the films sucked.

It's All About Love was torturous to watch, for example.

[Sexy Celebrity]

True. Jake Gyllenhaal could play Jesus. I'd love it to death.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I wish he would play Jesus. I might even convert.

[Miss Vicky]

Also not a fan of pretty much anything James Gray has done. Not looking forward to Low Life or Nightingale or whatever the hell they're calling the next Gray/Phoenix project at this point.

[Sexy Celebrity]

God, if you want me in church, you've gotta put Gyllenhaal on the cross.

[Miss Vicky]

If real priests looked like Joaquin in Quills, I'd attend mass.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I once gave this movie 5....

Now I'm gonna give it 3.5. But just for tonight.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I could watch something else, but I don't know if you're up for it.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Or if my laptop battery would last.

[Miss Vicky]

I'm up for it. But no idea what to watch.

I feel like comedies work better than more serious material, though.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Absolutely.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Okay, then, yes, let's do a comedy. I'm looking at your list.

[Miss Vicky]

Speaking of comedies. You need to watch Encino Man.

[Miss Vicky]

but let's not do that one, because I watched it too recently.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Oh my god, why do you own Year One? I had that once. I actually threw it away.

[Miss Vicky]

I don't know. Must've been super cheap. I'd throw it away too but I'm kind of a movie hoarder.

[Sexy Celebrity]

You have Lie With Me. *gasp* I bought that for that one guy who is constantly naked in it.

[Miss Vicky]

Oh wait, my site says why I have it "This movie is crap. I rented it out of sheer boredom, then lost it, then replaced it, then found the lost copy. That's the only reason why I own it."

[Sexy Celebrity]

I recently bought Joe's Apartment. It wasn't bad.

[Miss Vicky]

Lie With Me sucked.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I'm glad you don't like it. I think it's one of the worst films I have ever seen. If not THE worst.

[Miss Vicky]

I love Joe's Apartment.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Yeah, I didn't care for Lie With Me too much for itself. It just had that guy... Eric something... and he was HOT AS HELL. And it was practically X-rated.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I wish you had Bio-Dome. I'd love to watch Pauly Shore.

[Miss Vicky]

Quills is practically x-rated. The only trouble is that the naked men in it aren't men you want to see naked.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I love Daria.

[Miss Vicky]

I have Encino Man and Son In Law. That is the extent of my Pauly collection.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Quills is practically x-rated. The only trouble is that the naked men in it aren't men you want to see naked.

Eh... you never know with me.

[Miss Vicky]

Eh... you never know with me.

Full frontal Geoffrey Rush.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I am going to actually buy Encino Man, I think. And then I'll watch it with you -- first time, even. That would be good.

[Miss Vicky]

You should. I forgot how much I loved that movie until I watched it during my Brendan Fraser marathon. I even ended up naming my new rats after Shore and Fraser's characters.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I could maybe get into Geoffrey Rush. I'm more into backsides, though.

[Miss Vicky]

You see his pale white ass, too.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I'm feeling very nostalgic for Pauly Shore. I liked him in the '90s.

[Miss Vicky]

And he gets naked because Joaquin makes him strip.

[Sexy Celebrity]

That sounds even better.

[Sexy Celebrity]

What about if we watch Hedwig? I could go for camp and drag.

[Miss Vicky]

See, I told you that you need to watch it.

[Miss Vicky]

I'm up for hedwig. I also have wong foo

[Sexy Celebrity]

I actually DON'T have Wong Foo. Not anymore. I love the film and I need to rebuy it, but I just haven't... ALTHOUGH... I think it might... be on Demand Cable.

[Miss Vicky]

Oh and I must thank you again for putting Hedwig at #1 on your Milennium List. It making that list is what got me to watch it.

[Miss Vicky]

Sexy Celebrity does not own To Wong Foo?? What kind of gay man are you?!

[Sexy Celebrity]

If I could go back in time, it wouldn't be there in that place. I would have put Brothers there. IT KILLS ME that Brothers came so close to making it and didn't.

Maybe it was one of those "everything happens for a reason" things, though.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I used to own the DVD. My ex and I had it. And when we broke up, he kept the DVD. And I never rebought it because I WATCHED IT TO DEATH... and I felt tired of it.

[Sexy Celebrity]

But I need to get it because it has Coco Peru, the drag queen, in it, and she's my favorite drag queen.

[Miss Vicky]

yeah, but still.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Let's watch Hedwig if you want to. Since I brought it into your life. I have tales. I think I have tales, at least.

[Sexy Celebrity]

It's a better movie than To Wong Foo, also.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I MUCH prefer Priscilla, Queen of the Desert.

[Sexy Celebrity]

That I own on DVD and Blu-ray.

[Miss Vicky]

I've not seen Priscilla.

[Sexy Celebrity]

*GASP* You would love it.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I'm infuriated that it's not on the '90s list. I think it was #5 on my list.

[Miss Vicky]

Maybe I'll blind buy it.

[Miss Vicky]

You love it, HK loves it.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Are we watching Hedwig? I need confirmation.

[Miss Vicky]

Yes. I'm at the main menu as I type this.

[Sexy Celebrity]

And we have to start now before MoFo "shuts down" for the night in two hours.

[Miss Vicky]

You getting it loaded?

[Sexy Celebrity]

Press Play!

[Miss Vicky]

here we go!

[Miss Vicky]

my country tis of thee

[Miss Vicky]

I'm the new berlin wall

[Sexy Celebrity]

I first saw this in Washington D.C. back in 2001. At a very small theatre that only played indie films. I worked at it for a short time once. It's now closed.

I DIDN'T LIKE IT. I was expecting something totally different.

[Miss Vicky]

You know what sucks? I'm a woman, damn it. and this a-hole is a hotter chick than I ever could be.

[Sexy Celebrity]

When this was playing, Ghost World was also playing. I didn't see it then, but I wanted to, and I kinda hate that I didn't go see it then.

[Miss Vicky]

Yitzak is hot too. Even though he is a she.

[Miss Vicky]

I never saw Ghost World in the theater either. A friend recommended it because of my fascination with May/December relationships.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I don't think he's a cute man, though.

[Sexy Celebrity]

My relationship with the guy I saw Signs with was May/December. He was 38, I was 18.

[Miss Vicky]

John Cameron Mitchell? yeah. no. He's not an attractive male.

[Sexy Celebrity]

In fact, Ghost World was very autobiographical for me in regards to him. It was very Enid and Seymour. I mean, we WERE those characters, totally.

[Miss Vicky]

I always seem to attract younger men. Which sucks because I like them older.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I haven't seen him since then, either. Have spoken to him on the phone -- a couple of years ago. He apparently lives very close to me now, but we don't speak.

[Miss Vicky]

I'd be freaked out if some stranger gave me a hug.

[Miss Vicky]

I don't like strange people in my bubble.

[Sexy Celebrity]

See -- this is a great movie, but something about it that has always bugged me about it -- it's extremely sappy. It's all about love and hugs and stuff.

[Miss Vicky]

I like sap. Sap is good.

[Sexy Celebrity]

She looks fabulous in that gold top.

[Miss Vicky]

My man Friday through Thursday, Yitzak.

[Miss Vicky]

I love her fur coat joke.

[Sexy Celebrity]

My Aunt Trudy.

[Miss Vicky]

When it comes to huge openings, a lot of people think of me.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I love that Probe cover. The way Hedwig looks.

[Miss Vicky]

I love the dialogue in this film. It's very witty. very sarcastic. totally my cup of tea.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I feel like this is me, though. I could be this Hedwig character.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I'd be bitter about some man, stalking him, etc.

[Miss Vicky]

Tommy Gnosis. Michael Pitt. He's pretty hot too. He was especially hot in The Dreamers. But that movie sucked.

[Sexy Celebrity]

I have The Dreamers, too. Kinda for the same reason as Lie With Me.

[Miss Vicky]

Why do I love Yitzak so much?

[Sexy Celebrity]

I heard John Cameron Mitchell wrote a sequel to Hedwig. I'm dying to see it. I dunno what the status is on it. I know he wanted to take it to the stage first.

[Miss Vicky]

I think I also have a fascination with f*cked up semi-abusive relationships.

[Sexy Celebrity]

Because Yitzak is very lesbianish... and you said you have a bisexual side to yourself. I think that's where it's coming from.