I first met mark on another site (I know, remember when other sites existed?
) and he was much like he was here, (without the comfort of beng a fixture, of course) but the thing which struck me after a few enquiries and discussions was just how many films he'd seen and how well he could recall them. Since I was a small child I'd been 'the movie guy' among my friends and, well, pretty much anyone I knew. Suddenly I had one of those for myself and it was really cool. Years later he came here and I asked him if he was the same mark f as on the other site, which of course he was, and it was so nice to reconnect and feel as if I'd found him again.
Other than our shared love of Jaws (yeah I've got Charlie's Angels at #3 on my 100, but I've got the same #1 as mark so I must know something, right?), the main conversation I remember us having was about Paths Of Glory, a film he really loved.... And cried at the end of obviously.
I think if I'm known for anything on this site it's probably my love of Drew and dismisal of Kubrick, so when I saw Paths Of Glory (a film I was in no rush to see) I was surprised that I quite liked it. Not hugely, but it instantly became my favourte of the Kubrick films I've seen (which wasn't hard, but still.) For one of the few times in this site I wrote in nerdy film speak and wrote a long PM about the sound editing, use of long tracking shots and stuff like that. I got a reply addressing some of what I'd said (and added extra facts and discussion about one of the scenes I'd especially liked) and also asking if he could post that PM on the site. I asked why he'd want to do that? I can't remember what he said exactly, but I do remember he seemed annoyed. Annoyed that I'd question it (I was my usual suspicious and cynical self in my reply) but I also felt he was annoyed that I didn't show that side of me on the site and he wanted to display it. Maybe to encourage me to do so more often? Maybe to show others something akin to the HK he'd met on that other site when my love and passion for cinema was so much stronger? Maybe just to show that the guy who has Charlie's Angels at #3 on his all-time list does actually know what he's talking about (even if he doesn't care about it) and, maybe this says more about me than him, but I felt in that exchange that I'd seen the teacher side of him then. That I was like a pupil who had shown that he could do it, but wouldn't do it and what I was seeing was not his anger at me but his frustration with me. A frustration which I think eventually gave way to acceptance. At least, I hope it did.
The other thing which always came across so strongly on this site was his love of his family. His close friends too, of course, but his family was all to him and I'm pleased that he had one more Thanksgiving with you all. I know how much he loved that and how happy it made him.
Lastly, he was the first person on the site to whom I bestowed the moniker of Mofo Royalty. There've been a few others, but he was the first to inspire me to think that way.
I nearly died 5 1/2 years ago and when I talk about it with friends and family and things get to the lump in your throat/what if it hadn't gone well stage, I tell them the same thing. I'll tell you all the same thing now, as well as to remind myself of its truth - be thankful for the extra time we've had. Let's just be happy that we've had it for however long it lasts and know that I'm thankful for every extra day I've had with you.
The King is dead, long live the King.
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Thanks for sharing with us, sarah f, when you probably would rather be doing something else.