My First Two Movie Reviews EVER

Hi Movie Fans,

My newest post on my blog is about the cartoon The Clone Wars and my first post was about the Shia LaBeouf movie Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.

I would really appreciate it if some of you could take a look.

-Val

Look up Valeriewriter on Wordpress.

Can't you just copy and paste? If you are going to advertise, put a little work into it, jeez

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I used to be addicted to crystal meth, now I'm just addicted to Breaking Bad.

I'm new, so they won't let me post a link until I have done a ton of posts. Sorry.

Here is my Clone Wars review.

All of the amazing action and admirable charm that has become associated with the Star Wars films is still very much present in this fourth installment of the series, The Clone Wars.



A long time ago…



Since beginning in 1999 with Episode I-The Phantom Menace, George Lucas’ Star Wars series has been taking audiences (mostly boys) to a galaxy far away in space. Due to its popularity, two more movies followed: Episodes II and III. These were released in the theater. In 2004, three more movies followed but were sold only as a DVD box set and never shown in theaters.



But, Star Wars returns to the movie screens this summer with a cartoon version titled The Clone Wars (I apologize for not knowing which episode this movie is, but it never says.) This new movie brings back some Star Wars favorites like C3-PO, R2-D2 and OB-1, but also introduces new characters that fans are sure to love.



The whole movie is about a war between a robot army and the other army that dresses like robots. OB-1 and Anakin are Jeddi warriors who prefer the use of glowing swords and magic to ray guns. The Jeddi warriors are amazing fighters and can pretty much beat up anyone, but they use their magic for good. Well, most of them. There is one, an older man named Darth Sith, who uses his magic powers to control the army of robots.



As the story unfolds, we meet several of the new characters. First, there are the slug people who make you squirm, at first, but you grow to appreciate them. There are a lot of slugs in this movie, actually. One is a baby slug and one is an openly gay slug. The baby slug, called Stinky in the movie (I swear, I’m not being mean. That’s what they called him! LOL) is kidnapped by Darth Sith and his dad wants him back, so Anakin and R2-D2 and Padawan, a female Jeddi character (go girl!) do everything they can to rescue it. In exchange for finding Stinky, the dad says the Jeddi can come to his planet anytime they like.



Tons of amazing battles and amazing drawing make The Clone Wars a treat for almost everyone. Older people might not like it because it is on the loud side, but a lot of young people will like it. As for little kids…well, what’s to say? Little kids are gonna love this cartoon!



Who knows where this story will go in the next episode. Will the robots end up winning the war? Will there be any romantic developments between Anakin and Padawan? We will have to wait and see.



I have to congratulate George Lucas for being brave enough to have an openly gay character in his movie. Also, I think little girls will think Padawan is the coolest, toughest female ever to be put on film. She holds her own with the Jeddis and proves that it doesn’t matter if you’re a boy or a girl,…magic makes everyone equal.



I give The Clone Wars 4.5 out of 5 winks

God I hope your kidding...

More research needed obviously !

No, it's true. You have to post ten times before they let you put a link up. Lame, huh?

Star Wars episode 1: The Phantom Menance was a requel to the first Star Wars movies that came out in the seventies and eighties.... Those were the "never released in theaters movies".... They were possibly the biggest franchise ever...


My suggestion, run before Holden Pike comes and pray to god he doesn't find you...

Valerie, Lennon's comment wasn't questioning the posting rules, his eyebrows were raised at your sentence "Since beginning in 1999 with Episode I-The Phantom Menace, George Lucas’ Star Wars series has been taking audiences (mostly boys) to a galaxy far away in space. Due to its popularity, two more movies followed: Episodes II and III. These were released in the theater. In 2004, three more movies followed but were sold only as a DVD box set and never shown in theaters.

Ok you're obviously a youngster, but with a bit of research you'd know that the first Star Wars film was released in 1977, the episodes I to VI weren't made in order and were released from 1980 to 2005.

Have a look http://www.imdb.com/find?s=all&q=star+wars&x=0&y=0

Come on Lennon she's obviously very young, but really Valerie if you want to review films you've got to get your facts straight. As for your Indiana Jones review you can't say things like "This current movie was set in the past in the 1950’s. Usually, I am not always a fan of movies that take place in the past because I think that it’s hard for today’s audiences to care about it and relate to characters who dress like they’re going to a costume party. and expect film fans to read your reviews seriously given that so many films are set in the past. It's really not hard for today's audiences to care about films set in the past. if it's a good film then it'll succeed whenever it's set, and it's shortsighted to think otherwise.

I'll go out on a limb...and pedict...they will have twins...I don't know...I just have a feeling that the twins will be a boy and a girl...I reckon the boy may even be called Luke Skyrunner...hmmm...maybe Luke Skywalker...I reckon his sister will be called Leia or something!

...I have a feeling I do...these Jeddis could be a big thing one day...keep an eye out... lol just messing Val...when I met my wife a few years ago she hadn't seen the original Star Wars Movies either and had no idea about the rich lore us geeks love so much...so I get where you're coming from...but this is a movie forum...come prepared...

Actually, that's Padme. She's referring to "Padawan," because she seems to think that's Ahsoka's name, rather than her rank.

Valeriewriter, as you can see, we can mess with you a bit about what you wrote but don't worry about it. I think its great you want to write reviews, but as was said, just do a bit of research first.

And I have to say, regarding Christine's response to what you wrote about today's audiences not being used to films set in the past, I hope you'll rethink that. Because if you really analyze it, all your classic literature films (like Lord of the Rings, Pride and Prejudice) and epic films are usually based on the past. They have lots of costumes and today's audiences do respond.

You might be thinking that you don't like older films? And if that is the case, I hope you rethink that, too. I'm a teacher and I can tell you my students love Charlie Chaplin and they saw a clip from Some Like it Hot (made in 1959) and they laughed and loved it! I also showed some scenes from a 1962 film, To Kill a Mockingbird, and they loved that too. They see Hitchcock and respond. It's the story that people like, not the time in which it took place (even though for some of us that is part of the fun.)

Ahh...I haven't seen these new ones...and I plan on giving them a big, big miss...

Great Clone Wars review.

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Thanks!

Funny, as I consider 1999 to be the year that Star Wars died. Star Wars started in 1977, with the original film, which was titled simply Star Wars. They added A New Hope to the title for episode IV sometime in the 80s, when Lucas decided he wanted to continue the series, and bring us the three prequel film that showed the rise and fall of Anakin Skywalker.

That's right, the first film to get released was Episode IV, a new hope. I know, because I was there in the theater in 1977 watching it.

The Phantom Menace destroyed a sacred part of many people's past, and is, in my opinion, one of the worst films ever made.

Also, watch the original films to find out the concepts behind the force (energy sort of like the concept of chi in the east) that the Jedi's spend their lives to understand and harness. There is actually a lot of heavy philosophical subtext concerning the force, with concepts concerning trust, honesty, nobility, sacrifice, loss and taking the easy path rather than the hard in order to achieve gain. The force is certainly not just "magic", that's for sure.

Also, "Older people won't like it because it's on the loud side?"

You must be very, very young to make a silly assumption like that. I'm 36 and I still go to see bands like Black Sabbath and Megadeth.

Anyway - You have pretty decent composition skills for a youngster. Keep up the writing, and take criticism as constructive, as you clearly have potential to be a good writer someday.

The advice I would give is to thoroughly research all the material you write about, so that incorrect facts and assumptions don't mar your work, as in the review above. You will notice people calling you out on all the incorrect facts, because that stuff jumps off the page to people who know the real facts. Criticism may seem bad at first, but, it will help you improve the fastest. Take a look at Meatwadsprite's review thread. Look at the first review, then look at the most recent to see the large strides in both compositional skill and overall film perspective the kid has made. There is still room to improve, as with all of us, but, he has gotten better by orders of magnitude as time has worn on, and he has practiced and placed his work in the public discourse.

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First, This Isn't The First Instalment, It's The Seventh. These Are Prequels, There Were Three Movies Before This (I'm Puzzled How You Didn't Know This) And They Were Showed In Theaters. Also It's Not Spelled 'OB-1', It's Spelled 'Obi-Won Konobi'. Also There's Only One D In Jedi, And Those 'Glowing Swords' Are Called Lightsabers. And It's Called The Force, Not Magic Powers. How Does A Cartoon Make You Squirm? Also "Older People Might Not Like It Because It's Loud"? And If You Watch The Third Movie (Which Is Really The Sixth), It Shows You How It Ends, This One Takes Place Between The Second And Third Movie. And Seriously, A 4.5/5?

Obi-Wan Kenobi.

The reviews are graded in WINKS. Do you get it yet?

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