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Galaxina (William Sachs 1980) Trash rating
Galaxina achieved cult status after it's star (and former Playmate of the year) Dorothy Stratten was murdered by possessive husband Paul Snider. Stratten was rumoured to have become close with filmmaker Peter Bogdanovich on the set of his 1981 comedy They All Laughed. In turn Snider, overcome with jealousy, tied her up sexually assaulted and shot her, before turning the gun on himself. Up until then Stratten's career had been on the rise thanks to her Playboy appearances. She'd found small roles in a number of films in 1979, and even appeared in episodes of television shows like Fantasy Island and Buck Rogers in the 25th Century.
Written and directed by William Sachs, Galaxina was a spoof designed to cash in on the global demand for 'space operas' following the success of Star Wars in 1977. Though whilst Lucas was busy labouring over his masterpiece, Sachs had been lazily throwing together his 1977 crapfest The Incredible Melting Man. Still, that film was a moderate success thanks to its goofy title and impressive Rick Baker makeups. It was also an indication of the kind of quality to expect with Galaxina.
In the film we follow the Infinity, an interstellar police cruiser and its oddball crew who are sent to recover a crystal called the Blue Star (dramatic music). After a rolling credits sequence (ala Star Wars) that goes on forever, we meet Captain Cornelius Butt (Avery Schreiber), the Sarg (Stephen Macht) and some other dude in a cowboy hat. We also get lots of shots of Galaxina (Stratten) a sexy mute robot who sits in a white chair, and electrocutes anyone who touches her. Fast forward through some decidedly unfunny dialogue, to a duff space battle with an alien who wants the Blue Star (dramatic music) and looks like a messed up Klytus from Flash Gordon. We also meet the other Infinity crew members, a black Mr. Spock ripoff with batwings, an old Chinese guy who spouts proverbs like Charlie Chan, and a rock eating alien prisoner. Add to that subplots involving the Sarg falling in love with Galaxina (who eventually stops electrocuting him and learns to talk), plus Captain Butt who eats a weird egg and gives birth to an alien that thinks he's it's mother. Oh and let's not forget the space bikers who worship the god of Har Lee David Son *groan*
Clearly a vehicle for Stratten to showcase her voluptuous talents, Galaxina ultimately falls completely flat due to its boring script, and cheap production values. The opening credits that go on forever are an early indication that Sachs was padding out running time wherever possible. Indeed this film is at least twenty minutes too long, as nearly all the scenes in the first two acts of the movie feel tediously dragged out. Not only are they slow, but also painfully unfunny as most of the gags completely miss the mark. The supporting cast are all extremely wooden, appart from Schreiber who at least tries to inject some comedic gusto into his performance. Though sadly he's left hopelessly flogging a dead horse as the material on offer is so poor. As a result you're merely left ogling Stratten who strangely for this type of fare, does nothing more than silently stand around in lycra looking pretty. Yup that's right, not only is there no nudity from the former Playmate, but for the first half of the film there's no dialogue either. Perhaps that's the greatest joke of all, that faced with Stratten's dubious acting ability, Sachs saw fit to limit her lines to practically zero.
In it's favour the film does pick up half way through when Stratten is given more to do and the narrative takes on some focus. There are a couple of colourfully amusing tavern scenes (the second of which is a shot for shot rip of Star Wars), and the running joke involving Captain Butt's alien baby is rather cute. Galaxina even borders on likable for the final act, coming off like some half baked mixture of Roger Vadim's Barbarella (1968) and an original episode of Star Trek. You almost begin to forgive the second rate battle scenes (involving static spaceships that shoot each other from opposite sides of the screen), poor makeup, and purile script...but not quite. Then it ends abruptly and the realization dawns that you've just wasted ninety minutes of your life on pointless un-exploitative exploitation.
Galaxina achieved cult status after it's star (and former Playmate of the year) Dorothy Stratten was murdered by possessive husband Paul Snider. Stratten was rumoured to have become close with filmmaker Peter Bogdanovich on the set of his 1981 comedy They All Laughed. In turn Snider, overcome with jealousy, tied her up sexually assaulted and shot her, before turning the gun on himself. Up until then Stratten's career had been on the rise thanks to her Playboy appearances. She'd found small roles in a number of films in 1979, and even appeared in episodes of television shows like Fantasy Island and Buck Rogers in the 25th Century.
Written and directed by William Sachs, Galaxina was a spoof designed to cash in on the global demand for 'space operas' following the success of Star Wars in 1977. Though whilst Lucas was busy labouring over his masterpiece, Sachs had been lazily throwing together his 1977 crapfest The Incredible Melting Man. Still, that film was a moderate success thanks to its goofy title and impressive Rick Baker makeups. It was also an indication of the kind of quality to expect with Galaxina.
In the film we follow the Infinity, an interstellar police cruiser and its oddball crew who are sent to recover a crystal called the Blue Star (dramatic music). After a rolling credits sequence (ala Star Wars) that goes on forever, we meet Captain Cornelius Butt (Avery Schreiber), the Sarg (Stephen Macht) and some other dude in a cowboy hat. We also get lots of shots of Galaxina (Stratten) a sexy mute robot who sits in a white chair, and electrocutes anyone who touches her. Fast forward through some decidedly unfunny dialogue, to a duff space battle with an alien who wants the Blue Star (dramatic music) and looks like a messed up Klytus from Flash Gordon. We also meet the other Infinity crew members, a black Mr. Spock ripoff with batwings, an old Chinese guy who spouts proverbs like Charlie Chan, and a rock eating alien prisoner. Add to that subplots involving the Sarg falling in love with Galaxina (who eventually stops electrocuting him and learns to talk), plus Captain Butt who eats a weird egg and gives birth to an alien that thinks he's it's mother. Oh and let's not forget the space bikers who worship the god of Har Lee David Son *groan*
Clearly a vehicle for Stratten to showcase her voluptuous talents, Galaxina ultimately falls completely flat due to its boring script, and cheap production values. The opening credits that go on forever are an early indication that Sachs was padding out running time wherever possible. Indeed this film is at least twenty minutes too long, as nearly all the scenes in the first two acts of the movie feel tediously dragged out. Not only are they slow, but also painfully unfunny as most of the gags completely miss the mark. The supporting cast are all extremely wooden, appart from Schreiber who at least tries to inject some comedic gusto into his performance. Though sadly he's left hopelessly flogging a dead horse as the material on offer is so poor. As a result you're merely left ogling Stratten who strangely for this type of fare, does nothing more than silently stand around in lycra looking pretty. Yup that's right, not only is there no nudity from the former Playmate, but for the first half of the film there's no dialogue either. Perhaps that's the greatest joke of all, that faced with Stratten's dubious acting ability, Sachs saw fit to limit her lines to practically zero.
In it's favour the film does pick up half way through when Stratten is given more to do and the narrative takes on some focus. There are a couple of colourfully amusing tavern scenes (the second of which is a shot for shot rip of Star Wars), and the running joke involving Captain Butt's alien baby is rather cute. Galaxina even borders on likable for the final act, coming off like some half baked mixture of Roger Vadim's Barbarella (1968) and an original episode of Star Trek. You almost begin to forgive the second rate battle scenes (involving static spaceships that shoot each other from opposite sides of the screen), poor makeup, and purile script...but not quite. Then it ends abruptly and the realization dawns that you've just wasted ninety minutes of your life on pointless un-exploitative exploitation.
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100 Favourites From The Future: REWIRED
100 Favourites From The Future: REWIRED
Last edited by Used Future; 06-04-09 at 06:41 PM.
another one to give a miss 
