Worst/weirdest spam you've ever received

Oh, man, have I got stories. But I was prompted to create this thread because of this truly heinous spam message I got this morning:

Yep, that's right. Junk/penny stock spam based around war. Stay classy, spammer.

I just get the usual medical stuff and pills that give vitamins.

I have had one that said something like "Sign up and earn cash £s!!"

Reading through, I realised it was one of those medical experiment companies where they make you take pills and spray stuff in your eyes and stuff.

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We once got used book spam here on MoFo. No joke. Added it to the Glossary and everything. I'm like...really? Used books are lucrative enough that you're spamming them? On a movie site?

If I wanted to read, I'd activate the Subtitles

I just get a lot of penis enlargement stuff. Which is oh so useful, you know.

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I don't remember my spam....

No words can describe the awkward weirdness of this.

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Look, I'm not judging you - after all, I'm posting here myself, but maybe, just maybe, if you spent less time here and more time watching films, maybe, and I stress, maybe your taste would be of some value. Just a thought, ya know.

I was offered penis reduction surgery for men with an over large shlong in a spam email. It scared me, it was like they knew! But how did they know?

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“If the doors of perception were cleansed every thing would appear to man as it is, Infinite. For man has closed himself up, till he sees all things thro' narrow chinks of his cavern.” BLAKE.

I tried to go on this site I use for free TV programs on my Ipad and was presented with a link that took me to a video showing a woman about to insert a massive *censored* in her mouth.

Some of us have to make a living - and I was gentle with her.

She looked like the type that liked it rough tbh.

Don't they all

I get ones like Get laid in Ti Juana Tonight!! And messages from all kinds of young girls from all over the world.

Sex Kitten noticed my Facebook profile and thought I was cute.

(if so, I can only imagine what Sex Kitten looks like....)

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Under-the-radar Movie Awesomeness.
http://earlsmoviepicks.blogspot.com/

I think you're cute, Earl. But I don't know if that helps.