Movie Tab II

The long Hot Summer

Blood Diamond (2006) 4½/5

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8 1/2


This movie is a perfect mix of the abstract and the concrete. The characters, acting, dialogue, composition, editing, pacing - everything, is awesome.

The Garden Of Allah

Lady In The Water (2006, M. Night Shyamalan)

2/5

Nicely crafted and visualised (not surprising as Chris Doyle did the DP duties) but irritatingly slight and more than a little dull.

I didn't laugh out loud at the screenplay (as I did with The Village) so that counts for something, I guess, and at least Bryce Dallas Howard wasn't being chased by The Honey Monster in this one.

Shyamalan goes to unnecessary lengths, in the DVD extras, to point out that Lady In The Water is a bedtime story. Heading the critics off at the pass, maybe, but quite fitting as I'd fallen into an almost catatonic state before I could reach for the remote's 'off' button...

Jobe done, Night, now go and make that Splatter movie. Just don't write the damn thing.

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"Critics are like eunuchs in a harem; they know how the Tatty 100 is done, they've seen it done every day, but they're unable to do it themselves." - Brendan Behan

Sorry, I missed this earlier… I enjoyed The Departed but it just didn't blow me away(pun intended ). I mainly figured out what was going to happen during the first 30 minutes... and, to me, it ended up being just another unrealistic Hollywood cops and robbers… and what was up with Jack's character? I wanted to run him through the car wash.... on the hood....

Blood Diamond


This had a lot more action than what I expected and L. DiCaprio's accent didn't make me throw my own feces at the screen, which I was kind of expecting to do, for fun mainly, but anyways... The only thing that really got me besides how gorgeous J. Connelly is was how annoying D. Hounsou's character, Solomon, could be at times. Oh well. Still a good movie.

Roman Holiday. Cute.

An Inconvenient Truth (2006, Davis Guggenheim)

2/5

Highly laudible, and all that, but if I ever see another flippin' graph I'll grab Albert 'Disappearing Bald Spot' Gore squarely by the nads and shout rude words about his wife being a nutter.

The sad fact is this - I learned more about what the jilted President was trying to say by listening to the commentary track.

AG didn't appear on the commentary track.

Davis Guggenheim directed a few episodes of Deadwood and, by the end of An Inconvenient Truth, I was yearning for Swearengen & Co's Shakespearian declamations more than ever.

"Global Warming? Gut the c*cksuckers!"



Anyone mind if I croon the first verse of My Way?

Workprint of 300

True Romance. 3/5. Not quite funny enough to work as a black comedy.

Kalifornia


B. Pitt's character, Early, is absolutely hilarious - when he's not killing people. A man named Bojan Bazelli did the camera work, which is amazing. B. Bazelli's also the one who did Surviving the Game and Pumpkinhead, neither of which come close to what he did with Kalifornia. What didn't DaShiz like about it though?... D. Duchovny's voice over, that's what I didn't like. And, as an FYI, all the towns these people visit while on their trip west spell out the four main actors names. I don't remember where I read that, it could have been here, Amazon.com, or IMDB.com, but it doesn't matter, because it's true.

Sherlock Holmes - The Woman In Green

Quiz Show 4/5.

Rented this after its inclusion in the mofo top 100; good film, don't know why I haven't seen it before.

'Invincible'

I enjoyed this one. I love it when a person takes the pain that another (his wife leaving him he didnt live up to her expectations ) does to one and makes something positive out of it, especially when it's a true story for the most part.

Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan (2006 - Larry Charles)

Hmmm.... No, not at all as funny as everyone says. A few things were hillarious though. And it seemed to be staged to a much higher degree than I expected too.

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The novelist does not long to see the lion eat grass. He realizes that one and the same God created the wolf and the lamb, then smiled, "seeing that his work was good".

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They had temporarily escaped the factories, the warehouses, the slaughterhouses, the car washes - they'd be back in captivity the next day but now they were out - they were wild with freedom. They weren't thinking about the slavery of poverty. Or the slavery of welfare and food stamps. The rest of us would be all right until the poor learned how to make atom bombs in their basements.

I kind of agree with you, but of course, you let it get overhyped by waiting so long to see it, and probably heard about so many of the funniest parts that it would have been impossible to watch with fresh eyes. Of course, I'm just guessing because I don't know your situation, but I saw it late like you did and that was the case for me.

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"Like all dreamers, Steven mistook disenchantment for truth."

The Mark Of Zorro

Eragon


This movie comes equipped with lines such as "I'm just a farm boy." and "You have enough heart for the both of us." and "We can do this... together." I gave it two thumbs up because it's for kids, and I would have really liked this, even more than I did just now, when I was a youngen'.

Day of the Dead


Go ahead, all you horror fan-boys, and start to cry and whine about why I'm stupid for giving this two thumbs down. You want to know why I didn't like it? I'm tired of crap movies using the military as some sort of retarded systematic giant. There always seems to be the wild card, the joker, the crazy, the weakling, and then the commander that has no emotion. It's crap: a cheap generic movie fertilizer to help a weak story line.

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A Good Year (2006) 2/5 - (and the 2 is for "Lance Armstrong" .... )