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28 days...6 hours...42 minutes...12 seconds
Bad Moon (Eric Red, 1996)

Michael Pare goes to visit his sister (Mariel Hemingway) and nephew after being bitten by a werewolf and murdering some people in the woods. His reasoning? Maybe family love can cure the curse, duh. Dumb, by the numbers werewolf flick, hampered by Pare's wooden performance, and some truly awful CGI transformation sequences. Partially redeems itself with an exciting showdown sequence involving the family dog Thor (the biggest star of the movie) fighting the monster, but most likely forgettable unless you saw it as a kid.
I've been wanting to see this movie ever since I was a kid, but never got the chance to. I remember seeing the poster and thinking how awesome it looked.
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"A laugh can be a very powerful thing. Why, sometimes in life, it's the only weapon we have."

Suspect's Reviews



Bright light. Bright light. Uh oh.
I hope you forgive me. I'm listening to Vin Scully announce the Dodgers and some of these flicks aren't all that interesting, but I hope you appreciate the way I describe them. Above that, I've got all kinds of things with trying to pay off Sarah's USC tuition as well as trying to help her with her various problems involving such necessities as Concert Tickets! HA!

Bonjour Tristesse (Otto Preminger, 1958)




The same year that David Niven won his Best Actor Oscar Award and that Deborah Kerr got another Best Actress nom for Separate Tables they teamed up with Preminger and Jean Seberg as Niven's daughter whose admiration for her father seems to be just a little bit unnatural. The flick is watchable but on the lightweight side. Seberg is supposed to be a Brat and she plays her part well, but sometimes it comes off as if somebody should at least give her a major league spanking, and then the movie would have had more power or even meaning.

Senior Prom (David Lowell Rich, 1958)
///High School Confidential! (Jack Arnold, 1958)




A couple of 1958 flicks about "high school life" with plenty of popular music for people to groove to. Senior Prom is more into the innocence of high school even if the significant others want to have sex before they get married. The musical guest stars include Louis Prima, Keely Smith, Mitch Miller, Bob Crosby, and even Ed Sullivan gets involved in the proceedings. There is nothing whatsoever special about it, but for those old enough to know who I'm talking about, it's certainly passable entertainment.

High School Confidential! scores extra points for being campy yet not completely hokey, plus the opening scene has Jerry Lee Lewis singing "Boppin' at the High School Hop" while playing the piano in the bed of a pickup truck! The flick is supposed to be all about kids smokin' weed, a narc infiltrating the school, a couple of hot blonde female grown-ups (Mamie Van Doren and Jan Sterling) and the leader of the school's "out-there" students, John Drew Barrymore who is actually quite entertaining doing mock-beat poetry. Just wait until Jackie Coogan shows up and tries to shoot heroin into Russ Tamblyn's arm! Maybe it's too cool for school!

7th Heaven (Frank Borzage, 1927)




One of the greatest silent films ever, made at Fox Studios at the same time that Janet Gaynor made Sunrise there with F.W. Murnau. This is the perfect example of a film which utilizes the most-shameful melodrama to make superb entertainment. There is just something about the characters and Borzage's realistic, yet "angelic" direction (first Best Director in Oscar history) which makes this film seem far superior to any others which go out of their way to seem like 19th-century Simon Legree laugh-a-thons. Maybe I'm wrong, but Murnau and Borzage (often considered the most-romantic Hollywood director of the first decade of talkies) seemed to push each other to streamline silent storytelling and to especially create awesome sets for their films to live and breathe in. Gaynor's soul shines through the entire film in one of the greatest female performances of the '20s. Another thing to consider is that even before The Jazz Singer was released that this film played in theatres with a "filmed" musical score, some synchronized sound effects and a song at the end. Let me put it this way: even if you think this film is unbelievably hokey, you will be entertained and surprised, far beyond what you could ever imagine. Please report back to me because I've only scratched the surface of this flick. (I don't have the time... )

This DVD had the "restoration" of Borzage's The River which starred Charles Farrell from 7th Heaven and a sexy actress named Mary Duncan. It's full of sex, yet most of the rest of the plot was never filmed or lost. It looks like an enormous production though. I cannot give it a rating, but if you Netflix 7th Heaven, be sure to flip it over to see what's left of The River (1929).

Videodrome (David Cronenberg, 1983)




There's something about Cronenberg. He comes up with terrific ideas (just like Carpenter did for years) and then he seems to come to some conclusion long before you and I get there. I'm not sure if that means that Cronenberg is brilliant in his concepts yet unable to control or play out these ideas, but sometimes when watching his films I get that idea. Videodrome seems to have a perfect Cronenberg plot, and James Woods and Debbie Harry go along with it wonderfully, but once we learn that the concept of "Videodrome" is to destroy yourself, then it just seems to be a lot less significant than what it started out to be. I mean, it does play out the way it says things have to be, but it also seems like Cronenberg should have allowed the concept to take itself another step further. As it is, it's over and done with before 90 minutes.

Thoroughly Modern Millie (George Roy Hill, 1967)




This is a wonderful spoof of '20s silent movies since it involves the White Slave Trade and a lot of classic songs from the '20s. The cast is especially wonderful (Julie Andrews, Mary Tyler Moore, James Fox, Carol Channing, John Gavin, silent screwball siren Beatrice Lillie and many others) and it's just a great combo of the silly and the knowledgable. The songs are hummable, the plot is wild and crazy and all the "racism" may not be totally forgivable but it seems to be all done with a grain of salt, considering the importance of the roles of Philip Ahn, Pat Morita and Jack Soo. I'm going to show Brenda The Boy Friend next because she wanted to relive this wonderful flick, but she's never even heard of the Ken Russell flick.

State of Play (Kevin Macdonald, 2009)




I'm not sure what I think of Tony Gilroy. He seems to write and direct thrillers which just aren't very suspenseful or exciting. I liked Macdonald's Touching the Void and The Last King of Scotland, but this one seems slightly weaker. It's certainly borderline watchable but it just doesn't add up to me as a significant flick, no matter how much effort they put into the sets and making the whole thing realistic. And no, I haven't seen the British mini-series which must be a lot better.

The Crazy World of Julius Vrooder (Arthur Hiller, 1974)




That image is 100% more creative than anything in the flick. Timothy Bottoms was just so awesome in The Last Picture Show and The Paper Chase that I feel almost sick to tell you that he is completely nondescript in this flick. I don't think he's all that horrible, but between him and Arthur Hiller, they do not seem to comprehend anything about a Vietnam veteran who has returned to the L.A. area in a mentally-challenged state and tries to live out a fantasy life to forget about the war. On the other hand, Barbara Seagull (Hershey) is totally-believable as Bottoms' nurse and love interest.
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Cronenberg is a funny soul.

I love his film making, but I swing back and forth with his writing.
My 2 favourite Cronenberg films are "The Dead Zone" and "Crash"...from other sources.
And yet one of my least favourite is the crappy "Naked Lunch"....from another source again. So hey.

next up though are "rabid" and Shivers". As far as I know original works.

"Videodrome" to me is the classic example of my dilemma with him.
I love all the film in what it shows and how it is shown and acted...and yet the writing for me goes to pot in many places.
The basic plot of "Videodrome" is crazy, extreme, off the wall and brave and as such has no real need to vanish up it's own arse near the end.
It seems like Cronenberg decided that true art should be unfathomable...that no matter how weird, mad and distorted an idea/film is if the audience is actually following it...its failed, so we must explode it all with a tediously pretentious philosophical A(rse) bomb.
For there...in the rubble of what was once a great film anyway...is art's true from.

**** that ****.

"Videodrome" is not in the 'up its own arse for no reason' level as the worst examples of david Lynch though. Which is good. It still manages to retain that basic, for me essential, strand of coherence right up until the end.

I adore "Blue Velvet", "Twin Peaks" and especially "Wild at Heart". To me these are basically non-mainstream, extreme, bizarre, dream-like, warped, crazed, off the wall genius created by an obviously unique brain (even if "Wild" is again a separate basic source}.
Great. Surely this is enough for Lynch?
Nope...Instead, because he must have suffered the shock of some kind of success... he seems to have decided all that was surely not art after all so has spent the years since exploding those frustratingly pretentious A(rse) Bombs.

Both "Lost highway" and "Mulholland Drive" started off perfectly.
And they were once again, extreme, off the wall, wildly unusual and bizarre.
Great!
But then Lynch explodes his pretentious Arse Bomb and suddenly they become the equivalent of those hateful 'modern art' installations that get awards thrown at them by people who really only pretend to grasp (as any discussion with any group of people who thinks they all understand "Mulholland Drive" shows) what they are applauding.

For me Lynch now turns his films into one of these modern 'art' monstrosities whenever he can...
The kind of 'great' art where you stand in a white room with a microscopic black dot in the corner of one wall, a dead lizard (painted pink) lying on a chair in the middle of the floor and Mozart played backwards on the spoons being blasted out on a glass gramophone.
For that IS SURELY art? Yes?
No...It's just bollox.



I've been wanting to see this movie ever since I was a kid, but never got the chance to. I remember seeing the poster and thinking how awesome it looked.
Well there's always Amazon; who knows you might like it. I borrowed the dvd off a friend.



Bright light. Bright light. Uh oh.
Whatever you say about this post, it does utilize the original theatrical posters for the first three flicks.

Star Wars
(George Lucas, 1977)




I realize that I'm one of those people who saw Star Wars at the theatre upon original release, twenty times in the first year, so to me, yes, it was something akin to the second coming of Jaws. No, this time the film didn't save my life, but I graduated from college just about a week after the film came out, so it did seem to come along as the completion of the Jaws miracle two years previously. Nowadays it's usually taken for granted that people think that The Empire Strikes Back is the best of the series, but I still don't buy it personally. Sure, the sequel is more-serious and darker, more-operatic, introduces the Jedi Yoda, and has one of the greatest reveals in film history, but it's just not really all that fun and then it ends anti-climatically. I love The Empire Strikes Back, but I love Star Wars much more.

For all its seeming ripoff of legends and tales from all over the world (and it's not my place here to discuss those; they have been discussed at the site elsewhere), Star Wars still feels fresh and new to me. I'll be the first to say that the acting and dialogue may seem weak here and there, but in the context of the entire stand-alone film and awesome universe and characters created, Star Wars deserves as much slack as just about any film I can think of. It's not meant to be all that deep, yet it easily becomes "the stuff that dreams are made of". Besides that, for all the acting you may think is weak, much of it actually fits the youngish characters, and to balance them out, you have the wonderful Alec Guinness, Peter Cushing and the overpowering voice of James Earl Jones.

I know that a lot of people hate Lucas based on his constant tinkering of the old trilogy and what they see as a raping with the new trilogy, but Star Wars was cool from the get-go and it still remains cool and just one of the most fun film experiences a child of any age can have. I put Star Wars on last week with a friend who hadn't even seen the version with all the changes and the extra F/X, and we both became little kids again. We didn't give a crap who shot first because we both remembered who shot first. It's not that big a deal in the grand scheme of things, at least it's not worth changing your opinion on what rating to give Star Wars. Go ahead and give Lucas some personal low ratings if you feel the need, but please don't attack the film (I have it in multiple incarnations, including the original release). I guess in this case, you can switch around the saying about "attack the message, but not the messenger."

Anyway, why do I love Star Wars? The opening scene with the Empire starship flying over your head at the beginning attacking Princess Leia's ship is still as memorable as it ever was. Tattoine is an awesome planet, containing tons of non-human life and the awesome space port of Mos Eisley and its charming cantina. No matter what Guinness thought of his character or dialogue, his Obi-Wan Kenobi is an awesome anchor to give this seemingly-lightweight film some needed extra gravitas. The switch to Warp Speed and the attack on the Death Star trench are two of the greatest scenes I've ever seen with a packed audience where everyone went insane laughing and clapping. John Williams did compose better scores than he did for the Star Wars series, but 95% of people will always remember him for the Star Wars films.

Just to remind people that Star Wars is actually full of wit or at least some form of humor, what about these bon mots of dialogue: "Uh, everything's under control. Situation normal." "Don't call me a mindless philosopher, you overweight glob of grease." "Who's the more foolish: The fool, or the fool who follows him?" "Aren't you a little short for a stormtrooper?" "Look, Your Worshipfulness, let's get one thing straight. I take orders from just one person: me." "It's a wonder you're still alive." "Will someone get this big walking carpet out of my way?" "You came in that thing? You're braver than I thought." "So, what do you think of her, Han? "I'm tryin' not to, kid." "Good." "Still, she's got a lot of spirit. I don't know, whaddya think? You think a princess and a guy like me... " "No." "Let him have it. It's not wise to upset a Wookiee." "But sir, nobody worries about upsetting a droid." "That's 'cause droids don't pull people's arms out of their sockets when they lose. Wookiees are known to do that." "I have a very bad feeling about this." "One thing's for sure, we're all gonna be a lot thinner." "Garbage chute. Really wonderful idea. What an incredible smell you've discovered!" "It could be worse." "It's worse." "Your eyes can deceive you; don't trust them."

May the Force be with You.

Raiders of the Lost Ark (Steven Spielberg, 1981)




I guess that poster pretty much explains why I have to love this flick, but no, it's just a coincidence. I tend to think of this as a Spielberg flick rather than a Lucas one, but I guess you'll look at it whatever way you do. Since this film came out well after Jaws and Star Wars, I saw this one at the theatre that summer less than I saw the others; this time, it was only 17 times. I can remember buying some tickets for my second viewing (believe it or not, the first time was a sneak preview, a process which seems to have "gone with the wind"), and while I was waiting at the next-door fast food joint, I heard some teenage girls describe the movie as "Star Wars but without any boring parts". Raiders doesn't have any boring parts, but it does have some stretches where the filmmakers try to expand the suspense and mystery in ways slightly different than the other flicks and it does have a little bit of exposition. Of course, it also has Harrison Ford becoming another star character in Indy. It's an awesome adventure, but I guess, to quote Holden, "Your mileage may vary" (even though I can't help but think that Holds took that from Indy's line about "It's not the years, honey, it's the mileage.")

The thing which made Raiders so popular was that the opening scene grabbed everybody. True, it was basically an homage to '30s serials, but almost nobody who went to see the movie, repeatedly, had ever seen any serials. Raiders may have the greatest opening of any film I've seen, and I dare anyone to see the first ten minutes and then say they don't want to watch the rest. The thing is that after the opening, the film is crammed with set pieces, such as the drinking duel in the Himalayas followed by Indy's return to the very antagonistic Marion (Karen Allen), in a scene where Spielberg showcases the fact that this film is really about shadows. (Raiders has more significant shadows that any film I've seen, and Spielberg tried to carry on with the other three films, but never quite topped this one for shadow effects.) Immediately, we're enveloped in a machine gun battle with lots of fire. The other set-pieces include the kidnapping of Marion, the discovery and digging for the Lost Ark, the enclosure in the "Crypt" with the snakes, the Flying Wing fistfight, the truck scene (which may well be the greatest action scene in film history), the steamer/submarine scene, and the reveal of the Lost Ark scene (which to me is incredibly violent and scary, but is still shown uncut on commercial TV).

Raiders doesn't have as many memorable characters as Star Wars, but if you count all the Nazis, it's damn close. Besides that, it's actually set on Earth which (surprisingly) gives it an other-worldly quality. The flick has another ton of witty dialogue. Should I quote it? Oh, hell, why not? "This is it... This is where Forrestall cashed in." "A friend of yours?" "A competitor... he was good. He was very good." "You Americans, you're all the same. Always overdressing for the wrong occasions." "Wave it at anything that slithers." "The whole place is slitherin'." "There's a big snake in the plane, Jock. "Oh, that's just my pet snake Reggie." "I hate snakes, Jock. I hate 'em." "C'mon, show a little backbone, will ya?" "You want to talk to God? Let's go see him together, I've got nothing better to do." "Snakes. Why'd it have to be snakes? "Asps. Very dangerous. You go first."

Of course, I've been known to say that Temple of Doom is the best of the Indy flicks, and I still stand by that, but when I edit my Favorite Films, I'll definitely factor that in if I have to.


A Pocketful of Miracles (Frank Capra, 1961)




Capra's last film is a remake of one of his most-beloved flicks, Lady For a Day. This version is OK, but it really explains why Capra had to retire after he almost embarrassingly was "forced" to release this flick in 1961. This version of the story of Apple Annie (Bette Davis) is still set in the middle of the Depression, but it's filmed in widescreen color and is 40 minutes longer than Capra's original, which was rightly nominated for a Best Picture when its story really mattered, and it provided so many people with so much hope and joy. I give the original flick
, and it's one of the best feel-good films of the early 1930s. If you knew nothing about the original, this version is passable, but if you think you like this version, please try to watch the original ASAP, so you can see how the Capra Magic was originally intended to be understood and enjoyed.

The Children's Hour (William Wyler, 1961)




OK now, you have to trust me that this 1961 remake is better than the original, unlike the last film, although maybe "better" is the wrong word. This version, which is far more faithful than the same director's These Three 25 years earlier, isn't really any more entertaining or enlightening, but it's more faithful to Lillian Hellman's original play. These Three basically omitted the lesbian angle and turned it into a menage a trois so the Hays Code would actually pass it, but since the original play did seem to deal more with children's lies than sexual orientation, that earlier film is one which didn't really suffer all that much for quieting down the L-Word. As it is, these two flicks represent the same kind of adolescent dynamics and politics which the recent Where the Wild Things Are follows. They both detail extreme emotional lives where the youngsters can highly affect the lives of other youngsters and the adults responsible for them. In that way, Where the Wild Things Are is a much-more kid-friendly, and for that matter, it's even more adult-friendly, so please don't dis Spike Jonze' new flick because no matter how dark or blah you think it is, it can definitely be seen as something which is positive for both adults and kids. In The Children's Hour, Audrey Hepburn is her usual excellent self, but Shirley MacLaine really shines in the more difficult role and she also seems damned sexy too.



Welcome to the human race...


Big Fish (Tim Burton, 2003) -


This was a solid film, even if it did seem a little too emotionally manipulative for my liking. Or maybe I should've just given over to its delightfully charming sense of wonder and melancholy (which I did to a certain extent) but I don't necessarily think that makes it an absolutely spectacular film. Filled with colourful characters and some truly unexpected twists and turns (even if it did seem a bit too reminiscient of Forrest Gump or even The Curious Case of Benjamin Button - it's not just me who noticed the similarities that Big Fish had to those films, right?), it was definitely an entertaining film and even touching to a degree.



Rumble Fish (Francis Ford Coppola, 1983) -


I've heard a couple of mixed opinions about Coppola's monochromatic portrait of juveline delinquency, and I realised that there wasn't anything particularly special about it. Mickey Rourke's softly spoken turn as the Motorcycle Boy was cancelled out to some extent by Matt Dillon's tough-talking Rusty James and the other dubious performances (with the possible exception of Dennis Hopper as their alcoholic father). I did find it seemed too arty, namely as a result of various camera tricks and special effects such as time-lapse photography or an unconscious Rusty having an out-of-body experience. While it was done alright, it did seem to jar with what seemed to be a down-to-earth story and characters (or maybe it's just a matter of "acute perceptions").



Ed Wood (Tim Burton, 1994) -


More often than not, I don't write up tabs for films I re-watch. In the case of Ed Wood (a film I haven't seen in a few years), I feel like making a not-so-uncommon exception. Why? Well, as some of you have probably noticed I've been going through Tim Burton films lately, and as a result I figured I'd rewatch Ed Wood, which I tend to rank as my personal favourite of Burton's movies. What gives it the edge over other "popular" Burton films, though? There are some delightfully wacky performances - from Johnny Depp's uncanny turn as the eternally optimistic Wood, to Martin Landau's Oscar-winning turn as a washed-up Bela Lugosi, and all points in between (Bill Murray as a wannabe drag queen stands out especially well). The film plays close to typical biopic conventions, but that doesn't make the story any less madcap and entertaining, all shot through with smooth black-and-white photography and Howard Shore's brilliantly executed score. As I said before, this is probably my favourite Burton film.
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I really just want you all angry and confused the whole time.
Iro's Top 100 Movies v3.0



I Sell The Dead
Glenn McQuaid 2008




I'm a fan of Dominic
Monaghan, his attitude off screen as well as his acting. Ron Perlmen as well is an interesting guy and this story came across as unique so I was excited to catch this. Two grave diggers start unearthing zombies/vampires, mishap and mayhem follow. Sounds good but it wasn't. Or at least that good. I Sell The Dead is a film on a budget and its noticeable, not that I'm picky that way, its just the story never took enough for me to buy the cheap props. Maybe I'm being harsh, there are a few laughs and taken lightly is a bit of fun.




9
Shane Acker 2009



Despite a lack of depth, I loved the animation and creativity. Check out my review here.




Bonnie and Clyde
Arthur Penn 1967



I see the appeal in there doomed romance and tragic end and the acting is excellent, I just didn't enjoy it that much to be honest.


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Chaplin


Really enjoyed this star studded biopic. Downey jnr was brilliant as Chaplin especially in the physical comedy routines which were impeccable, solid performances were had by all.



there's a frog in my snake oil


Good Will Hunting

Can't say i was blown away. Sensitively directed by Van Sant and that, and the boys-made-good hold their own. Story's pretty by the numbers though. I didn't believe William's sudden 'menacing' turn defending his wife's honour, altho the relationship between him and Damon was probably the strongest strand of the film. For all the pleasing pops at exclusive academia, and focus on inner walls that can brick others out of our lives, the 'genius' strand seem to float free on its own, a bit pleased with its own 'street' novelty.





Millions Like Us

A propaganda docu-flick through and through, but a perfectly watchable one, with the plucky 1943 blitz-spirit pitched at just the right level to draw you into the brew. The focus is mainly on women working the factories, and a couple of relationships that evolve. Sidney 'Green For Danger' Gilliat & Frank 'St Trinians' Launder keep everything moving along with a certain charm, helped ably by the leads.

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Zedlen:

I'm a huge Gangster film fan, but "Bonnie and Clyde" never did anything for me either.
It was one of the first cracks in the dam that would see the old Hollywood system washed away by those daring young turks....But as a film in its own right I've never liked it at all.



I love Bonnie and Clyde. I love the period detail, beautiful scenery, depression era ambiance, wonderful performances (especially Michael J. Pollard), and poignant ending (that look they give each other). One of the best films of the 60's for sure. I just wish the UK dvd was widescreen.



I love Bonnie and Clyde. I love the period detail, beautiful scenery, depression era ambiance, wonderful performances (especially Michael J. Pollard), and poignant ending (that look they give each other). One of the best films of the 60's for sure. I just wish the UK dvd was widescreen.
I wasn't saying it was bad in that sense, just that I personally didn't enjoy it.



Bright light. Bright light. Uh oh.
Not only what Used said, but I think that some people don't seem to realize that Bonnie and Clyde is about 75% a comedy. Arthur Penn took his shoot-from-the-hip style and blurring of genre lines even further up the ladder in Little Big Man.



Not only what Used said, but I think that some people don't seem to realize that Bonnie and Clyde is about 75% a comedy. .
So it's not only a rather dull gangster film...it's an unfunny comedy as well?!

Seriously, I've always been surprised by my lack of enthusiasm for "B & C", but no matter how many times I happen to catch it my view does not change. Even if years least between viewings.
Hey ho.

"Cannibal Terror" -


Two low life crooks named Mario and Roberto, with the help of their big breasted female companion,decide to kidnap a young girl named Florence from her wealthy parents and ransom her.

But the plan gets ruined and they have to flee into a cannibal infested jungle…



Briefly on the infamous UK ‘Video Nasties’ list, “Cannibal Terror” was quickly removed and promptly sank without a trace, only to re-appear, fully uncut and approved by the BBFC, in 2003.
And boy, do we wish it had stayed lost!

Filmed in Spanish locations (badly standing in for South America) "Cannibal Terror" is a Production of the dreaded ‘Eurociné’ (who also vomited out “Zombie Lake”) and the low quality they often aim for is here in spades.

The movie’s opening credits are backed by a catchy, jaunty (if completely out of place) piece of music the lures us into the trap of thinking the film will at least be full of energy.
Far from it sadly and the rest of the music decides to fit in with the hellish stupor that washes over all who dare to carry on watching as it consists mostly of an annoying beeping noise, repetitive drones and something that sounds like radio interference.

The soundtrack horrors don’t end at the music though as we are bombarded by some (even by Euro Trash standards) awful dubbing and truly inane dialogue.
Whether the dialogue is authentic to the screenplay or a creation of the dubbing process I have no idea…But it’s bad.
Though some entertainment value is clawed from it.
How about this gem, as the crooks and the ‘companion of prominent breasts’ argue;
Man: “You mind your own ass”
Breasts: “My ass is go f*ck yourself” (!?)

The uneventful script drags the film’s pace to a crawl but so does the lousy direction and editing as we have to endure plenty of scenes where actors say their lines and obviously then have no idea what to do next as the camera lingers on their nervous and confused faces.
And boy, does the director like to film people walking a lot.
A trek into cannibal land by our fleeing kidnappers must go on for a solid ten minutes of screen-time, broken only be the occasional shot of a bored looking cannibal skulking behind a bush.
One brief attack scene later, we’re back to another massive portion of walking along footage, backed by more of those annoying burps and farts that pass for a musical score.

And seeing as the entire thing was shot in less than mysterious and exotic Spain, as opposed to the genuine Amazonian treks that Deodato and Lenzi undertook for their cannibal flicks, we of course have no ancient, deep, half-forgotten jungles here for our cannibals to dwell in. Oh no. Instead we have just grass and scrub land. with the odd, rather sick looking, trees and the occasional rock thrown in.
And when combined with the short and easy jeep ride our kidnappers take to get to, it means we get the impression that the general area where this supposedly wild tribe of stone age cannibals actually live is 5 miles out of town on a derelict piece of land soon to be a developed as a shopping mall.

The native’s camp has a few bigger trees around it, but their wide spacing, the bright sunshine and the lack of any actual undergrowth means we have none of that stifling, oppressive, mysterious, majestic atmosphere of a true undiscovered civilisation that we get from the likes of “Cannibal Holocaust” or “Cannibal Ferox”.

The cannibals themselves have of course gone down in bad movie history as perhaps the worst seen in the genre.
And for good reason.
A bit of cheap face paint can’t hide the fact that this tribe is made up of confused Spanish locals filled out with a bunch of tanned white dudes in bad wigs, who seem to be having a ball playing dress up and grinning at the camera.
It looks like am overly ambitious frat party out in the countryside where Billy Bob decided it would be cool to dress up like natives, have a BBQ, get drunk and go ‘ugga bugga’ round the world’s wimpiest camp fire.
Although saying that there is also a balding, paunchy, accountant type playing at being cannibals too. And this guy unfortunately figures prominently in many shots, thus exploding even the slightest chance there ever could have been of portraying an even remotely effective bunch of flesh eaters.

‘Do we at least have some nudity’ I hear you cry!
Yes indeedy we do.
We have a full frontal bath tub scene which is very welcome, but again even this is handled badly and is all we get.

Even the gore effects are equally bad and obvious in their execution.
We admire the way the makers decided to shove the gore right in the viewer’s face…we really do…but they could at least have tried to hide the fact that the ‘lost locals/frat boy cannibals’ are simply ripping at a pig’s carcass in the first gore scene.
It’s true the (long) scenes of guts, flesh, and various innards being pulled out, ripped apart and generally messed with are suitably gross, but the fact it simply looks like a dead pig being mauled means any shock and horror is lost.
Check out a similar slaughter sequence in “Jungle Holocaust” to see how a genuinely disturbing cannibal feast should be filmed and constructed.

Nothing else of note happens until we get another full-on bit of pig abuse at the end.
And if the fact we were seeing a pigs carcass was obvious in the first scene, here it’s spelt out in neon letters fifty foot high!
Classic bad moment to end them all is when, despite the quick cut away from it, we clearly see a split pig carcass on its back, held by it’s front legs, being supposedly cut open with a big sword.
I care not how many weak cries of supposed human suffering they dub over the poor porker , of that they squeezed a pair of blue jeans onto its back legs (I kid you not) , this is perhaps the most shockingly unconvincing gore sequence I have seen since the papier-mâché head in the rubber crocodile’s mouth abused my senses in “Brutes and Savages”.

The big surprise (and shame) is that the film simply doesn’t play at all (dubbing aside) like those Euro Trash movies we love so much.
There is a certain feel ,a certain tone and vibe to Euro Trash flicks of the late 70’s early 80’s that they all share, now matter how diverse.
“Cannibal Terror” though truly plays and feels (even though it is shot on film) like one of the many no budget, shot on a friend’s video camera, Indy outfit American films that clog up the shelves of budget stores everywhere.
It’s a tragedy of epic proportions…
This is more “Camp Blood” than “Zombi 2”.

Overall then a complete and utter stinker. A total waste of celluloid and one of the worst (though perhaps not quite the worst, maybe) films on the ‘Video Nasties’ list.
Trust me…Just don’t bother.



Ok so its 3:23 AM Greenwich time(London time) the reason I am writing so late is that I watched a movie.Lately haven't logged many movies that I have seen but there was nothing impressive
Surrogates-Matrix meets I robot in 80 min.(sh1t)
I love you Beth Cooper-I wanted an easy cheesy comedy with a lot of laughs but got disappointed(sh1t)
and there were other movies that I have seen many times like Predator,300 and Ocean's thirteen
Pi was really good even though its really confusing movie and I might need to watch it again but still great style of shooting, soundtrack(Clint Mansel rules)

and to get to the point of this post

Few days ago a friend of mine from L.A. told me she went to see Paranormal Activity(just to let you know I know only that it was by the people who made Blair Witch project)so after the movie she asked a friend of hers to sleep over at first I am like ok so she is a girl(yes I know Blair Witch was ****** scary but you can't use the same trick twice can you?) So it's 1:10AM the movie is waiting for me on the lap top,turn off the lights my roommates are asleep everything is quiet I put my headphones and hit play.Well the banner said it don't see it alone,for the next hour and a half I had so many cold chills that ran through my spine that every time I wanted to press escape and go to bed but I might as well finish it,you have no Idea how bad I wanted it to finish(right now as I am typing my hands are still shaky)and believe my I love horror but I couldn't recall that horror more like Freaky actually extremely freeky I have never been more scared in my life watching a movie so be warned fellow MoFo's I hope you havent seen trailers or any info about the movie it will make it even better for you.OK so I will go now play some music and hopefully fall asleep listening.
__________________
I'm in movie heaven



Ong Bak 2


Fight scenes were amazing the non fight scenes were crap, but that is what I expected. The fight choregraphy was phenomenal. Tony Jaa with weapons is a good thing



28 days...6 hours...42 minutes...12 seconds
The people who made Blair Witch did not make Paranormal Activity


SAW VI (Kevin Greutert)




Can We Finally Put A Nail In This Coffin?


With Special Agent Strahm dead, Hoffman can continue Jigsaw's work and make more people stare death in the face for a chance at redemption. Although, not everything goes according to his plans, as two agents are hot on his tracks.

Okay, so you know the gist of what the film is about. It's exactly the same as every other SAW film. A killer puts someone in a trap, twists and turns and boom, leave room for another film. This one is no different. First being tagged as the final SAW film. The one to complete Jigsaw's true game, it leaves the viewer with an emptiness and false promises.

Once you get into a number as high as 6, in a horror franchise, you know the film can't be that good. It seemed that SAW somehow broke that trend and gave it's fans what they wanted. Sure, the quality has dropped with every new entry, but it's not like the films are horribly bad. Saw V was the worst of the bunch, I dreaded the next one. Yet to my surprise, this one is a step up.

What this series has manage to do is keep a continuous mystery throughout every film. Each new film would add another piece to a puzzle that fans just ate up. What's on the tape, what's in the box, what's in the letter, etc. Keeping an audience interested in a series this long, I give them props. Making a new SAW film every year in time for Halloween and not having them be excessively bad. I also give props to. In the end, the SAW series is not as bad as everyone makes it out to be.

I love the first one, the rest have gone from mediocre to bad. This one falls into the mediocre category. It has all the gore, all the elaborate traps all the confusion the others have, yet I didn't come away as ticked off or as dirty as I did with V. I still find Hoffman to be a poor substitute for Jigsaw. I'm not a fan of their explanation for his final, true game. I'm not even a fan of the traps in this one, yet the film managed to be entertaining.

I laughed at parts I shouldn't have, I cheered for scenes that involved mutilation of body parts. For an average movie goer, I'd tell them to avoid this one, but for a fan of the series, I say enjoy. It tidies up a lot of unanswered questions and yes, leaves the door open for the next installment. One I hope I don't have to see, but will obviously end up watching.



and

Paranormal Activity (Oren Peli)



A Theatre Experience I'll Never Forget


A Theatre Experience I'll Never Forget., 24 October 2009
A couple decide to document their nights while the sleep, after they hear strange noises that they believe to be a haunting.

I respect this film, for the fact that it was shot for less than 20,000, had absolutely no marketing campaign and has become a huge success based on word of mouth and the audience demanding to see it. If only other studios would follow suit and listen to people demanding to see movies they want to see, maybe there wouldn't be so much crap out there.

Paranormal Activity is shot like Cloverfield, Blair Witch Project, REC, Cannibal Holocaust, etc. If any of those films gave you motion sickness, you might want to skip this one. Half the film is shot while they sleep, so the film is on a tri-pod, the other half is them walking around with it. So if you've never been a fan of those films, skip this one. Second, the film is not as scary as people make it out to be. Instead, it is one creepy and suspenseful film, that seeing in a theatre, only heightened my enjoyment of it.

The audience I went with, all had a collective "Oh My God". I could hear it every time something creepy happened. You could literally feel everyone in the theatre holding their breath every time they went to sleep. Again, if you are the type of person who wants to watch a film and not hear a peep out of anyone else, skip this film.

Now the film itself, shot in one week, small (very small) budget and every penny of it went towards the special effects. The special effects are what sell the film, if you don't buy them, the film will not creep you out. They looked real and impressive enough to push the film into a successful goal, which is to scare people. If you are already afraid of the dark, this film will not help you. Every creek, thump, noise you hear in your house will now have you thinking twice.

Less is more, The Blair Witch Project uses this, as does Paranormal Activity. The two leads, are haunted by a demon, one we never see, only hear. Whenever you go into a horror film, as a kid you would close your eyes in fear. Big mistake, because it's the ears you need to be covering. The sound is what makes you jump, hear nothing, fear nothing. The sound design behind this film is what is scary people, accompanied by the visuals (memorable scenes with the powder and bed sheets).

As the film progresses, the haunting gets worse. I don't want to give anything away, and I urge you to not watch the trailer. I watched the trailer and was waiting for those things to happen, it took away from the general fear. Not knowing what to expect will make this film that much better, that much creepier and that much more entertaining. I didn't expect it to be as funny as it was either, the lead male had some comic relief dialogue, the ease the tension.

The couple are believable, the hand held camera angle works here and the fear will set in. I applaud Paranormal Activity, for not only becoming an unheard of success, but for being one of the creepiest films I've ever seen.

Bravo.