JayDee's Movie Musings

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Bright light. Bright light. Uh oh.
... if it's my manliness that is on the line I may just have to... try and get it up later
Good luck with that.
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It's what you learn after you know it all that counts. - John Wooden
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Miss Vicky's Loyal and Willing Slave
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mirror

Year of release
1986

Directed by
George P. Cosmatos

Written by
Sylvester Stallone

Starring
Sylvester Stallone
Brigitte Nielsen
Brian Thompson
Reni Santoni
Andrew Robinson

Cobra


Plot - A gang of vicious, psychotic thugs known as The New World Order, led by The Night Slasher (Thompson), have the streets of Los Angeles in a state of panic. Following a series of murders and escalating brutality it quickly becomes apparent that there is only one man capable of bringing their reign of terror to an end. That man is Lieutenant Marion Cobretti (Stallone), aka Cobra. His renegade style and take-no-prisoners policing methods means that he is not especially popular with his superiors, but its his brand of justice that is required in this instance. After yet another killing, the cops finally catch a break when it turns out that there was a witness to the latest crime. The witness is Ingrid Knutsen (Neilsen), and its not long before she finds her life in danger. With the gang out to silence her it is Cobra who attempts to protect her. His efforts are sabotaged however from within his own police force, and it isn't long before they find themselves in a desperate fight for their lives.

Ah Cobra, god bless you. You're really, really not a particularly good film but I still like you. You're gratuitously violent, unashamedly trashy and dripping with cheese. For many people those are major drawbacks. For me it just sums up your charm!

By the time this film was released in 1986 Sylvester Stallone had already established two iconic, much-loved characters. In the character of Rocky Balboa he had his beloved underdog sporting hero. While with John Rambo he had his action/war hero. Well with Marion 'Cobra' Cobretti you can see it is a very concerted effort to establish another iconic character and potential franchise figure, this time fulfilling the classic renegade cop role. And more than that it feels very much like an attempt to clone the character and success of 'Dirty Harry' Callahan. Just like Dirty Harry he is a renegade cop who plays very much by his own rules, who clashes with his superiors and who hands out his very own brand of justice. And that Dirty Harry vibe is just amplified by the presence of both Reni Santoni and Andrew Robinson. Santoni played Harry's partner in Dirty Harry, and repeats the trick with Cobra. In fact his character is actually called Gonzalez in both films, surely no coincidence. And then there's Andrew Robinson, the man who so memorably played Scorpio opposite Eastwood's Harry Callahan in Harry's debut outing. Though here he actually takes on the role of one of the good guys (though Cobra may disagree).

Throughout the film it really isn't hard to see the longing to create a Dirty Harry for a new generation, never more so than in the film's opening sequence which sees Cobra called in to deal with a crazed psycho who is holding a number of people hostage in a supermarket. Cobra takes on the role of a one-man army, storming the supermarket all by his lonesome and engaging in an explosive fire-fight with the man. It feels like an exact carbon copy of the type of diversion Harry would frequently be involved in once or twice during every movie. The film also attempts to gift Cobra with some similarly styled one-liners, though none of them quite hit the heights that some of Harry's did, but fair play for trying; “You're the disease, and I'm the cure” and “You know what's bad for your health....me” being the most obvious examples to create something that could sit alongside “Do you feel lucky punk?”

A look at Stallone's CV shows that he has twice appeared in films based on comic books; first in Judge Dredd and then more recently in Bullet to the Head. Well you'd likely be forgiven for assuming that this film marked the third such occasion because in many instances Cobra really is very pulpy and comic book in style. That's true right from the start actually both in terms of tone and look. The film opens by inter-cutting images of an axe-wielding gang alongside a biker silhouetted against an impossibly red sky. And from then on there are so many little touches that feel as if they could be straight out of a comic book; Cobra's gun emblazoned with the image of a cobra on the handle, his classic car with the personalised licence plate AWSM 50, the gang clinking their axes together in some weird ritual/celebration and even the name given to Cobra's section on the police force - the Zombie Squad etc. There's even a little moment that reminded me of the iconic camp-fest that was the Batman TV series of the 60s. When one of his superiors realises they require his assistance he puts out the order, “Call the Cobra.” It felt so much like the instances where Commissioner Gordon would put out the call for Batman.

Film Trivia Snippets - Strange as it may sound, Cobra actually came about because of Beverly Hills Cop. Before Eddie Murphy came along it was Stallone that had been signed on to play Axel Foley. Stallone also did a lot of work on the screenplay, jettisoning much of the humour and turning it into an action spectacular the studio could not afford. When his plans fell through and Stallone left the project he reworked his ideas for that film into Cobra. /// Director Nicolas Winding Refn is aparently a huge fan of Cobra. In his film Drive, Ryan Gosling's character has a toothpick in his mouth in some scenes. This was Refn's homage to the opening scenes of Cobra where Stallone likewise has a toothpick in his mouth. /// There is actually a very rare workprint of Cobra that is available amongst its diehard fans. Although most copies are of a very poor quality, it includes 30 to 40 minutes of additional footage which are not available in any other version. This includes all of the X-rated material that was removed from the released version. /// The custom 1950 Mercury car that is driven by Cobretti during the film was Sylvester Stallone's actual car. The studio produced stunt doubles of the car for some of the action sequences but for the most part it is the car that Stallone actually owned. /// The movie was actually based on a novel by Paula Gosling called “Fair Game”. And nine years later the novel would again be the source material for a film, this time Fair Game starring William Baldwin and Cindy Crawford. And coincidentally both films suffered many of the same problems including both being re-edited in post production due to test audiences giving a negative reaction to the original cuts.
The pulpy, comic book vibe continues with the villains of the piece. As his nemesis, Brian Thompson's Night Slasher is a very colourful creation reminiscent of the kind of larger-than-life killer that often graced the TV show, Dexter. Together he and his Manson Family-styled cult, the New World, certainly make a memorable impression even if no depth whatsoever is given to the characters or their motives. And kudos to those in charge of casting for bringing in both Brian Thompson and Lee Garlington; it's hard to imagine they could have found two creepier looking individuals. In fact if you needed someone to play a crazed psycho in the 80s and you didn't turn to Brian Thompson you were missing out. In addition to its comic book feel, on occasion the film really is terrifically 80s, never more so than in the bizarre and inexplicable moment when the film all of a sudden breaks into a MTV music video that sees Brigitte Nielsen posing and dancing around a series of metallic robots that have seemingly been lifted from some sci-fi movies of the 1950s. And the film doesn't even address it! It just moves on as if it's the most normal thing in the world. And it gets even weirder. At the end of this impromptu music video we finish off with a close-up of the robots. The lights go out, the score becomes a sinister slice of electronica and one of the robots begins to glow red. The film appears to be setting up some kind of Terminator-like robotic uprising for Cobra to battle, but then immediately drops it.

I have always been great fan of Sylvester Stallone. Growing up with the films of Rocky Balboa, arguably cinema's most loveable underdog, instilled an early love of Stallone in me; one that has continued unabated. While I still enjoy his work here I certainly wouldn't say it's one of my favourite of his performances. Something I've always liked about Stallone is that very often it feels like there is an undercurrent of humour to his films and his performances, like he's aware of how ridiculous they are and is on the joke with the audience. Here however he plays it extremely straight, gravely serious and really quite po-faced. He grimaces and glares his way through the film, attempting to create the ultimate macho bad ass. And the film follows suit, also aiming for the very serious. So serious however that it almost goes too far and strays into the territory of spoofing both itself and the films of Dirty Harry.

So we know that Stallone both wrote and acted in the film, but perhaps that wasn't all because Cobra is one of these films that joins the likes of Poltergeist, Return of the Jedi and Tombstone in that rumours persist about who really directed the film. While George P. Cosmatos may be the credited director there is a real belief amongst many people that it was really Stallone that was calling the shots. Well whoever the director was (in addition to being due a fair amount of criticism for much of the film) deserves some credit for their handling of the action sequences which are largely very entertaining, with some fun fights, gun battles and car chases populating the film.

The character of Marion Cobretti was unable to capture the imaginations of the viewing public to a degree that would have seen a sequel being greenlit. And I think that's a bit of a shame. Whatever this film's limitations (and there are indeed many) I think it's good fun, and I'd have been more than happy to spend some more time with the man known as Cobra.

Conclusion - As I stated at the beginning of this review Cobra is not a particularly good film. It is all style and no substance, with no real plot or character development to speak of. But then that's not what you really expect from action movies of the 80s. They were all about exploitation, trashiness, cheese and aiming to be a guilty pleasure. And on all those fronts Cobra pretty much succeeds. It's the kind of film where if someone asks you "what's Cobra like?" you could either give the answer "it's rubbish" or "it's brilliant" and you'd be 100% right on both counts.



Good whiskey make jackrabbit slap de bear.
Stallone at his cheesiest.

Not one of my favourites of his, but it is fun and, of course, great review like always.
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"George, this is a little too much for me. Escaped convicts, fugitive sex... I've got a cockfight to focus on."



I really like Cobra, as you know, but I didn't know there was an X rated workprint. I really, really want to see it. Cobra's such a wonderful, OTT, cheesefest. Terrible characters, awful writing and the acting? Well, it's Stallone and Nielsen. If you've not seen it and it doesn't sound like a nightmare, then it's must see stuff. My favourite thing about the whole film is the gang. They're beyond ridiculous. This is one of the films I've had on my list to do a commentary for. I think it'll work wonderfully.

Excellent review, JD.
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5-time MoFo Award winner.



I'm glad to see that you took my advice, JD. Hopefully watching and reviewing a Stallone film helped reverse the flow of estrogen caused from The Fault in Our Stars. Cobra looks like the kind of film that would put hair on a man's chest. It's one of the only Stallone films I haven't seen, but your review for it makes it sound gloriously entertaining, even if it's for all the wrong reasons.
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Miss Vicky's Loyal and Willing Slave
I've actually gone back in and edited my Cobra review a little because I forgot something. At the bit where I'm talking about the robot music video I added -

"And it gets even weirder. At the end of this impromptu music video we finish off with a close-up of the robots. The lights go out, the score becomes a sinister slice of electronica and one of the robots begins to glow red. The film appears to be setting up some kind of Terminator-like robotic uprising for Cobra to battle, but then immediately drops it."

And I also can't believe I didn't throw in a mention for the Night Slasher's knife; that thing was f*cking bad ass!



I really like Cobra, as you know, but I didn't know there was an X rated workprint. I really, really want to see it. Cobra's such a wonderful, OTT, cheesefest. Terrible characters, awful writing and the acting? Well, it's Stallone and Nielsen. If you've not seen it and it doesn't sound like a nightmare, then it's must see stuff. My favourite thing about the whole film is the gang. They're beyond ridiculous. This is one of the films I've had on my list to do a commentary for. I think it'll work wonderfully.

Excellent review, JD.
Wow look at you, reading the entire review, even the trivia. And yeah I'd be interested in seeing the extended cut of Cobra but I'd approach with caution. 30 to 40 additional minutes is a substantial chunk of runtime; they might actually be able to build some plot and character in that time. It might even start to become a good film, which would completely ruin its appeal! And the gang truly are a wonder to behold. And I agree it would make a great film for a commentary. In fact a lot of Stallone's films would, like Tango and Cash.

Oh and if you want to know who/what is to blame for not having that 2 hour cut of Cobra it's your beloved Top Gun!

The first rough cut was over two hours long (the closest estimated original running time is 130 minutes). It was then shortened to a roughly two hour director's cut which was intended to be released in theaters. However, after Top Gun became a smash hit, Stallone and Warner Bros. were worried that Cobra - which would premiere the following week - would be overshadowed, so in order to ensure at least one extra screening each day the movie was heavily re-edited. Stallone removed much of the plot and scenes involving characters other than his own. Warner Bros. also demanded that the more graphic scenes be cut down or removed entirely because they were "too intense," and that some action scenes be cut for pacing.

When first submitted to the MPAA the film received an X rating, necessitating even more cuts. The full extent of the censorship is unknown, but based on director Cosmatos's commentary and several other sources, some of the cut scenes include:
  • The first murder victim having her throat cut and hands severed;
  • More dead bodies in the autopsy scene, including lingering shots of naked and mutilated bodies of murdered women;
  • An extended death scene for Ingrid's photographer Dan, in which he is hit several more times with axes and attempts to escape, only to slip on his own blood and fall down in puddle of it before being finished off with even more hits;
  • The scene in which Nightslasher tries to kill Ingrid in the hospital was cut down for pacing and content. The deaths of the janitor and nurse were originally shown onscreen and a scene where police guard outside Ingrid's room is killed by Nightslasher was also cut. A later scene where Cobretti mentions the officer's death to Monte was cut to maintain continuity, which as a result made the editing of that scene choppy;
  • More scenes of the townspeople being killed during the climax, including a scene in which one is hit in the face with ax; two of these death scenes appeared in 1990's TV versions of the film, but with most of the more graphic shots removed;
  • Graphic close-ups of the Night Slasher's wound after he is impaled on the hook; Cobretti repeatedly forces the hook deeper into Nightslasher as he screams in pain.
And thank you.

It's one of the only Stallone films I haven't seen, but your review for it makes it sound gloriously entertaining, even if it's for all the wrong reasons.
I'd certainly say to give it a go. And it reminded me there is still one Stallone film I've not seen. I think I've seen all his films from the 80s and 90s other than Nighthawks. Been meaning to watch that for years



I've not seen Nighthawks for ages, but I've seen it a few times and I've enjoyed it each and every one of them.

Those rumoured cut scenes sound great, although, what were they thinking? Cobra was never going to be as fantastic (or take as much money) as Top Gun, regardless of running time. Idiots. How is there not a directors/extended cut of Cobra? There's extended cuts of LOTR for crying out loud. That last one was over 10 hours long on its own.



Miss Vicky's Loyal and Willing Slave
Time for another one of my never-ending rambles about an old favourite. Though this time it's quite appropriate that it's a monster review.


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Year of release
1993

Directed by
Steven Spielberg

Written by
Michael Crichton
David Koepp

Starring
Sam Neill
Laura Dern
Richard Attenborough
Jeff Golblum
Ariana Richards
Joseph Mazzello

Jurassic Park


Plot - Wealthy entrepreneur John Hammond (Attenborough) has taken advantage of huge leaps forward in the world of science and genetics to create the greatest show on earth. On the tropical island of Isla Nubar he has created Jurassic Park, a theme park that he has populated with dinosaurs, brought back to life after 65 million years in extinction. Before the island is open to the public however a worker at the park is killed by a Velociraptor, prompting the park's investors to demand that a group of experts visit the park and sign of on it as being safe before the park can be opened. Joining the investors' lawyer is palaeontologist Dr. Alan Grant (Neill), paleobotanist Dr. Ellie Sattler (Dern) and Dr. Ian Malcolm (Goldblum), a mathematician who specialises in chaos theory. Joined on tour by Hammond's two grandchildren the group are astonished by some of the sights they find and it seems like the park is going to fulfil its potential as the greatest attraction on the planet. However it isn't long before things turn decidedly dangerous for each one of them. Unbeknownst to Hammond, the park's computer programmer (Knight) has been paid off by a corporate rival to steal steal dinosaur embryos. To do so he has to shut off the park's security systems, allowing the dinosaurs to escape from their enclosures and placing the lives of everyone in great danger.

“You know the first attraction I ever built when I came down south from Scotland? It was a Flea Circus, Petticoat Lane. Really quite wonderful. We had a wee trapeze, and a merry-go... carousel and a seesaw. They all moved, motorized of course, but people would say they could see the fleas. "Oh, I see the fleas, mummy! Can't you see the fleas?" Clown fleas and high wire fleas and fleas on parade... But with this place, I wanted to show them something that wasn't an illusion. Something that was real, something that they could see and touch. An aim not devoid of merit.”

That's a piece of dialogue spoken by Richard Attenborough's entrepreneur John Hammond. However you imagine that it could very easily be the mission statement that Steven Spielberg set out with when he embarked on the epic undertaking that was Jurassic Park, particularly that bit I've highlighted in italics. Throughout his career it seems like Spielberg has constantly had the goal of bringing a sense of wonder and of magic to cinema audiences, and of inflaming their imaginations. And he perhaps never scored higher in those regards than he did with this film in which be brings dinosaurs back to life after 65 million years in the wilderness. It really does feel like a classic slice of Spielberg as he attempts to meld ingredients from his most famous works into a single entity; the thrills and terror of Jaws, the magic and wonder of E.T., and the excitement and adventure of Indiana Jones. Now somehow this film is now over 20 years old!!! That just boggles my mind. Despite this I still believe that Jurassic Park is one of, if not the ultimate event movie of all time.

When people discuss what represents the 'magic of the movies' they frequently refer to a handful of specific scenes or images which wowed them upon first viewing and subsequently seared themselves into their minds. Moments such as Star Wars' opening image as the Star Destroyer first looms into view, the bicycle flight in E.T. The Extra-Terrestrial, King Kong on top of the Empire State Building, the crop duster in North by Northwest, Gene Kelly splashing through the puddles in Singin' in the Rain, the spaghetti eating in Lady and the Tramp, Tom Hanks dancing on the piano in Big, the Statue of Liberty reveal in Planet of the Apes, the musical communication in Close Encounters of the Third Kind etc. Well for me there are two moments which immediately jump to mind. The second moment is from Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, when the immense Argonath statues first loom into view.

Film Trivia Snippets - Had things worked out differently on the casting front, Jurassic Park could have been a reunion of Spielberg, Harrison Ford and Sean Connery following the trio's work on Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade a few years previously. Harrison Ford turned down the role of Dr. Alan Grant, while Connery did likewise with the character of John Hammond. /// William Hurt was also offered the role of Dr. Grant but turned it down without reading the book or the script. In addition, both Dylan McDermott and Tom Sizemore tested for the role. While Spielberg had also considered Richard Dreyfuss for the role following their work together on Close Encounters..., Jaws and Always. /// So a few names in the running for Dr. Grant. That was nothing compared to the search for an actress to portray Dr. Ellie Sattler however. Juliette Binoche was offered the role but turned it down to make Three Colours: Blue, while a whole host of notable names were considered for the role. Amongst them were Jodie Foster, Sigourney Weaver, Michelle Pfeiffer, Ally Sheedy, Geena Davis, Daryl Hannah, Jennifer Grey, Kelly McGillis, Jamie Lee Curtis, Julia Roberts, Linda Hamilton, Sarah Jessica Parker, Bridget Fonda, Joan Cusack and Debra Winger. Additionally Laura Linney, Sandra Bullock, Gwyneth Paltrow, Julianne Moore, Helen Hunt, Teri Hatcher and Elizabeth Hurley all auditioned for the role. /// And as a little extra Christina Ricci auditioned for the role of the little girl, Lex, while Jim Carrey was considered for the role of Ian Malcolm.
First and foremost however is a moment from Jurassic Park. It's a moment that actually comes fairly on in proceedings as Attenborough's Hammond gives a tour to his assembled experts who have been gathered together to assess the park. All of a sudden something catches the attention of Sam Neill's Dr. Grant. He stands up in the car, a sense of great wonder in his eyes. Dumbfounded and unable to speak he gets the attention of Laura Dern's Dr. Sattler by grabbing her head and turning it forcibly in the direction he is looking at. Her jaw drops and she sits there with her mouth agape. Spielberg holds the camera on them for a moment before finally allowing us in on the secret, revealing the epic sight of a brachiosaurus towering above them, rising up onto its hind legs so it can eat from the tops of the trees. With John Williams' truly iconic score sweeping up in the background it is a tremendous moment, one that really defines the magic of movies for me. On that initial viewing, as soon as I saw this I was just mesmerised. And even though I've now seen the film on countless occasions since, every single time that scene arrives on screen I still get a great buzz. Welcome to Jurassic Park indeed.

While I think this is a pretty great movie on its own terms, I am very aware that a large degree of the reason why I love it so much is due to the personal relationship I have with the film. While I didn't catch it at the cinema, Jurassic Park was the first adult film that I ever saw. Wait, let me be more specific. It was the first 'grown-up' film I ever saw. The first 'adult' film I ever saw is a very different story and one for another time. I can actually still remember very vividly the experience of first seeing this film at 7 years of age. Although it almost didn't happen as my mum had concerns about whether I was old enough and whether I'd find it too scary. Those concerns were probably quite well founded! I can very clearly remember being a little scared by the opening scene in which one of the park's workers falls prey to a raptor. That aside though, I just loved it. As was the case with just about every young boy I was fascinated by dinosaurs as a kid, so this film really was the realisation of my boyhood dreams. Despite the small issue of them being extinct Steven Spielberg had somehow managed to bring the dinosaurs back to life and captured them on camera. That's the kind of magic you can only get in film.

And when you talk of magic you just have to talk about his prehistoric cast. At the beginning of the review I mentioned how amazed I am that this film is now over 20 years old. A large reason for that are the film's incredible special effects which still to this day have the ability to astonish. While the odd effect here and there may now look a little iffy and dated, the large majority of them still hold up amazingly well. Along with Terminator 2: Judgment Day this was the film that really set the standard and showed the immense potential of CGI. And it's a testament to the effects of both films how strong they still look even today. The way the CGI is able to bring to life the Tyrannosaurus Rex and Velociraptors is particularly stunning. As impressive as the CGI remains today, and as utterly ground-breaking as it was back in 1993, I've always maintained that it's the practical effects of the Stan Winston studio that are truly important to the film as it really helps to hide the seams and convince you that what you're watching is real. Through their breathtaking models and animatronics, Winston and co just came up with a whole host of astounding creations; the absolute star of which is undoubtedly the Tyrannosaurus Rex. The instances where we are allowed to see it up close, even if it's something as simple as its foot pressing down and making an imprint in the mud, are just terrific.

Film Trivia Snippets - Jurassic Park forced some very creative sound design by the film's foley artists. The sounds made by the Brachiosaurus were a combination of whale and donkey sounds. The sounds made by the Dilophosaurus came about through a combination of howler monkeys, hawks, rattlesnakes and swans. The main cry of the Velociraptors was a combination of sounds from elephant seal pups, dolphins and walruses. While the roars of the Tyrannosaurus Rex were a combination of dog, penguin, tiger, alligator and elephant sounds. And for the scene where the T-Rex catches a Galliminus and shakes it in his mouth, the sound was taken from a dog shaking a toy in its mouth. /// Steven Spielberg and Michael Crichton's first meeting was actually over two decades previous to Jurassic Park. During the production of The Andromeda Strain (another film based on one of Crichton's books) Crichton was given a tour of Universal Studios. The individual who gave him that tour? A young Steven Spielberg. /// In Dr. Grant's trailer there are a series of newspaper clippings on his fridge. Amongst them are headlines that read "Space Aliens Stole My Face" and "Dinosaurs On Mars!" /// During the T-Rex attack on the car that held the two kids inside, things didn't quite go as planned but perhaps to the benefit of the film. When the T-Rex came through the glass roof, the glass was not actually meant to break. Therefore the screams and terrified looks from the children are very much genuine.
The strength of the T-Rex however should not overshadow the other gold-standard work they were able to create. Their work is almost entirely responsible for one of my absolute favourite scenes, that of the sick Triceratops. What they were able to create is so amazing and realistic that it enables the camera to get right up close and even allows the actors to interact with it without shattering the illusion. The moment where Sam Neill is able to rest himself upon the creature's stomach, moving up and down as it breathes is another wonderful moment. The scene also allows Laura Dern's character to show she's someone who's willing to get her hands dirty...literally! And then of course there are the Velociraptors which they are somehow able to make even scarier than the T-Rex. And while it may not be as showy or sexy as the work that went into creating the dinosaurs themselves, there is also some highly impressive craft in evidence when it comes to the production design with a series of grand sets that excite in their scale and detail (the huge entrance gates, the visitor centre and labs, the large electronic fence system etc). There are also some lovely smaller details in the set design such as the pillars in the centre's restaurant which have fossils carved into them.

While the dinosaurs are, and always were going to be the stars of the show, the puny little humans that take part are just about able to hold their own thanks to a series of engaging performances. What really stand out when it comes to the cast is how unusual it is by blockbuster standards. There are no big stars, hot young sex symbols or individuals who are obvious kick-ass heroes. If a film like this were made today you'd be forgiven for expecting the likes of Tom Cruise, Channing Tatum, Ryan Reynolds, Emma Stone and Megan Fox to be amongst the actors lining up to become dinosaur food. Instead Spielberg concentrated on populating his film with a series of solid actors who actually felt right in their respective roles. In the role of Dr. Alan Grant is the always reliable Sam Neill, playing a character who is only a step or two removed from one of Spielberg's most iconic characters, Indiana Jones. Like Jones he is a man in a profession that most would typically describe as 'dull', but he somehow finds himself at its very extremes . Like Jones he is not exactly the most care-free or cheery of fellows; I love the scene where he puts the fear of god into a young kid who dares to say of a Velociraptor that is “doesn't look very scary”, with Grant traumatising him with talk of spilling his intestines. And like Jones you can see the great passion he has for his work. Grumpy he may be, but Neill brings a bit of heart to proceedings, particularly in his interaction with Hammond's two young grandchildren. As his partner Dr Ellie Sattler, Laura Dern isn't given a great deal to do but does it in an feisty and engaging manner. She also happens to have a great set of legs on her. Now while I understand the character breaks somewhat from his depiction in the book I really like Richard Attenborough's portrayal of John Hammond. I find him very endearing as the kindly-seeming grandfather type with a sparkle in his eye, who nevertheless also has a little hint of a dark streak in him. The stand-out of the cast however would probably have to be Jeff Goldblum's Dr. Ian Malcolm, with Goldblum utilising his unique style to make Malcolm into a charismatic, snarky, somewhat cocky individual who's always prepared with a sarcastic and humorous quip.

While he is arguably the most popular director of all time, Steven Spielberg is also not without his naysayers. The most frequent complaint that is levelled against his work is that he has a tendency to wallow in sentimentality to the degree where it becomes mawkish. The one area where he receives almost universal praise however is in his handling of set-pieces, with it being very possible that he has no superior in that regard throughout the entire history of cinema. And this film really acts as a showcase of sorts where he can just let his talents and imagination run wild. This is especially true of the film's second half where the film does pretty much just toss aside any attempts at a story or characterisation and morphs into a full-on theme park ride. And on this evidence Spielberg is a pretty sadistic fellow. He seems to derive great pleasure from taking his characters and subjecting them to one nightmare after another, taking them out of the fire just to throw them right back into the frying pan. It really is just one thrilling set-piece after another, several of which are amongst the most classic ever committed to celluloid. The one such sequence that everyone remembers is the first appearance of the T-Rex. Foreshadowed by the masterful and iconic touch of the water ripples in the glass, it is the T-Rex's introduction that really kicks the film into another gear of both thrills and wonder. Its subsequent attack on the car holding Hammond's grandchildren is a thrilling and terrifying sequence. While some would no doubt argue that the film's set-pieces hit their peak with that scene, Spielberg was far from done. Following on from that are a series of equally exhilarating sequences with the T-Rex chase and the Raptor attack in the kitchen proving particularly memorable. There's another expert touch from Spielberg during the latter; the moment where one of the Raptors appears to have little Lex in its sights, charges and hits its intended target. Except for the fact that it was a reflection on a shiny surface.

Film Trivia Snippets - Michael Crichton's novel was published in 1990. However it was the subject of a bidding war before it was even published and went into pre-production in 1989 based only on his manuscript because it was just assumed the book would be a huge hit and make for a great movie. Warner Bros. wanted the rights with plans for Tim Burton to direct. Columbia was planning it for Richard Donnier. Fox were also interested with the intention of it being a project for Joe Dante. While Universal wanted it for Steven Spielberg. Crichton however was reluctant to submit to a bidding war. Instead he instructed his agents to put a set price on the film rights and he could then decide who was more likely to actually get the film made. After interviewing all the prospective directors, he agreed to sell the rights to Universal and Steven Spielberg, who was already his first choice. In the end Universal paid Crichton $2 million for those rights. Spielberg had actually been in the early stages of pre-production for the film “ER”, based on another Crichton novel. When he heard about the Jurassic Park however he dumped it so he could make that film instead. Afterwards he returned to “ER” and helped develop it into a TV series.
Throughout his career there have been a host of individuals with which Steven Spielberg has had several collaborations with. There's his partnership with George Lucas on the Indiana Jones films, his frequent casting of Tom Hanks and Richard Dreyfuss, his almost exclusive use of Janusz Kaminski as his cinematographer and Michael Khan as his editor, and his role as a producer and mentor to the likes of Joe Dante and Robert Zemeckis. Perhaps his most successful and renowned collaboration however would be with the legendary composer John Williams; in fact Williams has scored every single one of Spielberg's theatrically released films except for The Color Purple. And once you've seen the likes of Jaws, E.T., Raiders of the Lost Ark or Close Encounters of the Third Kind it becomes impossible to imagine them without the incredible contribution that Williams made. Try to picture a scene from one of those movies and you will inevitably have his score running through your head right alongside it. And Jurassic Park is certainly another you can add to the list. I don't think there's another composer in the history of cinema who can do awe and wonder quite like Williams, and this film provides one of the prime examples. For a film of this nature, with such a grand and immense concept, it is absolutely vital to get a score that will do it justice. And so much of the film wouldn't have anywhere close to the impact it does where it not backed by his compositions that beautifully complement what is happening on screen. The scene where the characters are in the helicopters and we get our first glimpse of the island for example; his epic, awestruck score lets us know that we are about to witness something truly monumental. It's not just the sense of wonder when the score plays its part however, it is also very effective at backing the more thrilling and sinister moments. There's a really small touch of his score that I love. It occurs during the first visit to the park's visitor centre. In conveying the sense of awe that the visitors have it is initially another slice of wonder as the camera pans across the room. As the camera falls upon the skeleton of a T-Rex however a dark, ominous tone breaks in to the score, foreshadowing the terror that is to come. It's just a small example of what Spielberg and Williams have done so well across their 26 films together, the collaborating of image and sound to tell a story.

Like the majority of major blockbusters, the most common complaint that is thrown the way of Jurassic Park is generally about its story, or lack thereof. For a film that details the rebirth of dinosaurs and is always going to be about the adventure of that I think there is just enough story to enlighten proceedings without bogging them down. The film really is a classic example of a film of two halves. In the first hour of the film it's all about the set-up; it's all about the magic and wonder of this venture that John Hammond has managed to create, and of explaining the science behind it. I just love the information film that is played at the visitor centre featuring the cartoon helix, Mr DNA. I think it's probably got to be the greatest example of an exposition dump ever. It's so fun and entertaining that you don't even notice you've just been subjected to such exposition. There's also an extra level of intrigue added by the corporate espionage thread featuring Wayne Knight's Dennis Nedry. The film even takes the opportunity, albeit briefly, to sneak in some serious points about the ethicality of what they are doing. As is summed up by Dr. Malcolm's criticism, “Your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should”, the film questions our right to play God. Just because we now understand and can manipulate genetics doesn't necessarily mean that we should. It's a notion that is still very prevalent and controversial today in the field of stem cell research and its capabilities in terms of cloning, designer babies, the eradication of disease etc.

Following that, the second half really does become all about thrilling the audience and leaving them as breathless as possible. Spielberg took his dinosaurs and mined them for two emotions. The film's first half is all about the wonder; the second half all about the terror. And Spielberg announces the switch in tone in a very deliberate manner. As the film enters its second half night falls, the rain begins to lash down and lightning begins to strike, letting us know we are firmly in classic creature feature territory. While Spielberg was happy to show us the 'nice' dinosaurs early (the Braciosaurus and Triceratops), just as he did with Jaws he made sure to hold back the dangerous specimens for a considerable amount of time. However right from the start he had been building the tension and conveying their threat. The film's very first scene details the delivery to the park of a Velociraptor. With Williams' edgy score and dozens of workers standing around wearing stern looks it builds a sense of trepidation, a sense that is quickly realised when one of the men falls victim to a vicious attack. Despite this Spielberg keeps the perpetrator completely hidden but for a glimpse into its eyes. There are then a series of other little touches to build the sense of dread such as the scene where a harness that one held a cow is lifted out of the Velociraptor pen in complete tatters. The sound design for the dinosaurs throughout is also fantastic, creating a series of ancient, guttural and bone-chilling growls and roars. It then falls on exactly the one hour mark before we first see the T-Rex and it's astonishing. As is pretty much the entire film.

Conclusion - Other than the first Lord of the Rings film I don't think I've ever felt such wonder at a film as I did with Jurassic Park. Steven Spielberg really did deliver one of the definitive blockbusters of all time. Thanks to some truly exceptional effects, both digital and practical, the film really was able to bring dinosaurs back to life; fulfilling the dreams of the young and the young at heart the world over. And if Alfred Hitchcock is the Master of Suspense then Steven Spielberg is surely in with a shot of the accolade, Master of Set-pieces. His work, along with some likeable performances, another terrific score from John Williams and those effects make for one of the great popcorn films of all time; something that may still hold true even after another 65 million years.



Bonus Film Trivia - In the original script, the T-Rex skeleton in the lobby was hooked up to pulleys like a giant marionette. In the original ending, Dr. Grant was going to man the controls and act as puppeteer, using the skeleton's head and feet to crush the Velociraptors. Spielberg changed the ending however to have the T-Rex save the day when he decided it was the hero of the film. /// After making the movie, Ariana Richards (Lex Murphy) developed a great interest in dinosaurs. So much so that she actually assisted Jack Horner (palaeontologist advisor for the film and the inspiration for the Dr. Grant character) on an actual dinosaur dig in Montana the following summer. /// A baby triceratops was built for a scene where one of the kids rides it. Special effects technicians worked on this effect for a whole year but the scene was cut at the last minute as Spielberg thought it would ruin the pacing of the film. /// With every new draft of the script, there would be a different set of survivors and a different set of characters dying. At various points during pre-production, Hammond, Malcolm, and Dr. Wu were all going to die and Gennaro and Muldoon were going to live. /// Ariana Richards' audition consisted of standing in front of a camera and screaming wildly. Steven Spielberg "wanted to see how she could show fear." Richards remembers, "I heard later on that Steven had watched a few girls on tape that day, and I was the only one who ended up waking his sleeping wife off the couch, and she came running through the hallway to see if the kids were all right."



Someday i am going to get around to a re-watch of Jurassic Park. I liked it well enough, but it isn't the all time favorite for me that it is for many.
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Letterboxd



nice review JayDee! went and saw Jurassic Park on the big screen again a year or so ago when it had a re-release. Last year i gave a dvd of this movie to my 11 year old cousin for his Christmas present, and it's a testament to its lasting power that he found it a cool gift. I like Jeff Goldblum and his chaos theory

agree how cool the effects still are both for this and T2: Judgment Day, which you mentioned in your review



Indeed. Jurassic Park and T2 still hold up today since they use practical effects WITH use of CGI. That way it tricks the brain into thinking the CGI is the same as the practicals.





I rewatched Jurassic Park a year or two ago and was still amazed at how realistic everything looked and how exciting the film still felt. I wouldn't give it a perfect five myself, but it's definitely a very good movie.



Miss Vicky's Loyal and Willing Slave
Wow I can't believe some people seemed to have actually read that s*it! At that length I thought there was no chance of anyone doing it. As a rewatch for my long-gestating favourite films list it's not so much a review as another of my personal love letters to a particular film

I rewatched Jurassic Park a year or two again and was still amazed at how realistic everything looked and how exciting the film still felt. I wouldn't give it a perfect five myself, but it's definitely a very good movie.
I'm certainly not saying it's a 5-star movie in terms of quality but in terms of how much I personally love it and how much it means to me I'd say 5 stars is definitely warranted.


Oh and it's always nice to see Commodus



I'm one of those Spielberg naysayers you reference in your review, but even I find Jurassic Park to be one of the elite blockbusters. It isn't a personal favorite, and I haven't watched the film in many years, but I still think of T-Rex anytime I see a ripple in a glass of water.



Wow I can't believe some people seemed to have actually read that s*it!
I didn't read it.

I looked at the title of the film, then at the popcorn rating, then glanced at the novel's worth of text and said "Nope, not reading that." But thumbs up anyway.



Miss Vicky's Loyal and Willing Slave
mirror
mirror

Year of release
2012

Directed by
Tim Burton

Written by
Seth Grahame-Smith

Starring

Johnny Depp
Michelle Pfeiffer
Eva Green
Helena Bonham Carter
Chloe Grace Moretz
Jackie Earle Haley

Dark Shadows

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Plot - In the year 1752, Joshua and Naomi Collins, with young son Barnabas, set sail from Liverpool, England to start a new life in America. But even an ocean was not enough to escape the mysterious curse that has plagued their family. Two decades pass and Barnabas (Depp) has the world at his feet-or at least the town of Collinsport, Maine. The master of Collinwood Manor, Barnabas is rich, powerful and an inveterate playboy...until he makes the grave mistake of breaking the heart of Angelique Bouchard (Eva Green). A witch, in every sense of the word, Angelique dooms him to a fate worse than death: turning him into a vampire, and then burying him alive. Two centuries later, Barnabas is inadvertently freed from his tomb and emerges into the very changed world of 1972. He returns to Collinwood Manor to find that his once-grand estate has fallen into ruin. The dysfunctional remnants of the Collins family have fared little better, each harboring their own dark secrets. Matriarch Elizabeth Collins Stoddard (Michelle Pfeiffer) has called upon live-in psychiatrist, Dr. Julia Hoffman (Helena Bonham Carter), to help with her family troubles.

When this was released a couple of years back it failed to really capture my attention. And even upon deciding to watch it I wasn't entirely sure what to expect. As it turns out I really rather enjoyed it. Although that being said I'm not sure if I would actually recommend it to anyone, largely because I'm not entirely sure who it's meant to be made for, aside from Tim Burton and perhaps Johnny Depp of course. How Tim Burton managed to talk the studio into spending $150 million on this is rather baffling because it really isn't an easy sell for audiences. While it has a few laughs it's not an all-out comedy. While it has a couple of spookier moments it's most certainly not a full-blown horror. Nor is it a drama or a romance though it includes elements of both. While it's dark it doesn't go full blown gothic. And while it's sometimes rather silly it doesn't go far enough to become fully camp. So what exactly is it? Well it's an oddity which doesn't really fit comfortably into any restrictive box, other than to be described as a typical Tim Burton film.

And in addition to that confusion the film certainly isn't short of flaws. For a film whose running time is encroaching upon 2 hours there really is very little story to speak of. It has several small threads which often act as little vignettes battling for attention throughout but struggles for a real focus or momentum, suffering from pacing problems as a result. Instead the film concentrates a great deal of time on the fish out of water/culture shock experience that Depp's vampire is going through, and to be fair to the film it does get decent mileage out of it. I also struggled to identify what tone exactly Burton was aiming for on occasion. There are instances where the film feels really quite cheap, cheesy, and melodramatic; a feeling powered predominantly by some quite hammy acting. I was unsure however whether it felt like that just because it did, or if it was done on purpose in an attempt to pay homage to Dark Shadows' soap opera roots.

Even with Burton's films which have not attracted great love or admiration from critics or audiences alike, the one thing you can just about always guarantee is that aesthetically it's going to be a creative and generally dynamic experience. And Dark Shadows is no different. More often than not it does look rather fantastic, very much employing a similar tact to another Depp collaboration, Sleepy Hollow. It's the same drab, drained colour palette and heavy use of smoke and fog to create a fantastically atmospheric world. The opening prologue set back in the 18th century is just pure Burton. And the level of detail to be found in its production design is excellent; the Collinwood mansion where Depp and his family reside in particular is incredible in its intricacies; a delightful cavalcade of spires, wood carvings, spiral staircases, decadent grandeur, gorgeous craftsmanship, lavish furnishings and an endless assortment of knick-knacks. In addition to the mansion delivering some gothic flair you then have the costumes, cars and general design that bring the flashy, psychedelic 70s to life.

Film Trivia Snippets - Tim Burton, Johnny Depp and Michelle Pfeiffer were all big fans of the original Dark Shadows TV show that aired in the 60s, having watched it when they were young kids. In fact Michelle Pfeiffer was such a fan that when she heard the show was to be adapted for the big screen she actually called up Tim Burton and asked for a part in the film, something she has rarely ever done throughout her career. /// Anne Hathaway, Lindsay Lohan and Jennifer Lawrence all auditioned for the role of Angelique Bouchard, but lost out to Eva Green. /// The face of Nightmare Before Christmas' Jack Skellington appears on a scarecrow set amongst the pumpkins at the Collinwood mansion when Willie first meets Barnabus. /// To create the chalk-white complexion that Johnny Depp sports throughout the film, make-up artist Joel Harlow would apply several layers of custom greasepaint to his face. /// Several stars of the original Dark Shadows TV show make cameo appearances in the film. Jonathan Frid (Barnabus Collins), Lara Parker (Angelique Bouchard), David Selby (Quentin Collins) and Kathryn Leigh Scott (Maggie Evans/ Josette DuPres) appear together as party guests at the ball held at Collinwood Manor.
Over the last decade or so Johnny Depp has gone from becoming one of the most interesting and respected actors out there to something almost resembling a persona or even a caricature; wheeling out the same basic performance time and again and really cornering the market on quirky. Which is not to say he still hasn't done some great work; his performance as Jack Sparrow in the first Pirates film was pure genius. And I really rather enjoyed his performance as Barnabus Collins, the man cursed to be a vampire who returns from two centuries in an unwelcome grave. It feels like he is rather taking the p*ss at times with his campy showing; hamming it up in fine style as he sends up legendary horror stars (particularly those who have played Dracula) such as Bela Lugosi, Lon Chaney and Christopher Lee; playing into their template of the stiff, old-fashioned, grandiose acting style. However it never feels like he is really mocking those individuals, with a tangible fondness to be found throughout. And the script does give him the occasional line of wonderfully colourful dialogue to sink his sharpened teeth into; “You may strategically place your wonderful lips upon my posterior and kiss it repeatedly!”, “Goest thou to hell, and swiftly please, and there may Azmodaeus himself suckle from your diseased teat” and “Fifteen, and no husband? You must put those birthing hips to good use at once, lest your womb shrivel up and die.” for example. And his wonderfully droll approach to the material ensures that serious and melodramatic pieces of dialogue come off as wonderfully rich and amusing; “I have spent the last two centuries locked in a box, with nothing to keep me occupied but a glimpse into the dark shadows of my soul.”

Around his regular collaborator, Tim Burton was able to assemble quite the impressive cast of seasoned professionals. So it's just a shame then that so many of them feel like they were severely underused and their talents wasted; Jonny Lee Miller and Jackie Earle Haley could feel particularly aggrieved on that front. Faring best of the supporting cast is perhaps Helena Bonham Carter who appears to have great fun with Dr. Hoffman; arguably the film's most colourful character (at least amongst the humans), a drunken lush of a woman who is the Collins' live-in psychiatrist. Also hitting the mark is Chloe Grace Moretz who adds some spark to proceedings as Carolyn, the sulky and sarcastic teenage daughter of the family. As the most 'hip' member of the Collins family she gets several fun scenes with Barnabus that highlight how out of time he is. Michelle Pfeiffer gives a solid showing although she feels a little out of place with everyone else. While the rest of the cast drift back and forth between drama and comedy she plays it very straight and serious for pretty much the whole film. As the supposed love interest of Depp's Barnabus is Bella Heathcote but sadly her performance and character are extremely flat, generating zero chemistry with Depp in the process. More successful on that front is Eva Green as Angelique Bouchard, a vengeful witch who has a love-hate relationship with Barnabus; very heavy on the hate. They engage in one of the more energetic and entertaining sex scenes I've seen in quite some time.

There are two distinct camps that you can split Tim Burton's films into. There is the big budget extravaganza that you feel the studio has convinced him to make (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Alice in Wonderland, Planet of the Apes) and generally lack for charm and invention. And then there are his very personal projects that make you question just how he managed to talk someone into funding them; quirky efforts such as Beetejuice, Edward Scissorhands, Ed Wood and Batman Returns (yes it's a superhero film but it's so weird!). Of the two approaches I far prefer the latter. You can tell he really cares about these films and as such they benefit greatly. And I'd say that Dark Shadows falls into that category.

Conclusion - Why exactly I enjoyed this film quite as much as I did is a little bit of a mystery to me. The script and story are a jumbled mess, its tone is all over the place and its action-packed finale is a little underwhelming and felt completely out of place with the rest of the film. And yet for all those many flaws and complaints I did really enjoy it; I just found it fun in a really quirky kind of way. The film does look gorgeous with excellent work by the set and costume departments and has a few fun performances. I'm assuming that very few people on here will care for Dark Shadows, but I certainly did.



I'm not a big fan of Tim Burton movies in general, but I remember seeing the trailer for Dark Shadows and thinking it looked decent. I do like the cast, and with your review, I would watch it.