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THE MARTIAN (2015)
Director: Ridley Scott (seriously?)
I'm not going to save any surprise rating for the end of this review like The Martian saved it's payoff for me. This movie kind of sucks and I'll tell you why I think that.
The following text in red are the notes I was keeping on my smartphone, while I watched;
The martian
Jeff daniels on toilet dumb and dumber- couldnt take him seriously
"Im a botanist"
Clumsily convenient with video journal exposition. Makes me like "Moon" that much better.
Tonally awkward. Lighthearted is ok but not 140 mins worth. Hello netflix series. Just checked the remaining time counter..ugh..yup 140 mins and still a while to go
Bereft of actual emotion
Kids pretending to have feelings
Common trait in current wave of want to be actors. Zero charisma. Make pretend intellect. Wonder if the writer is really happy aside from the money? Who cares, it isn't even good writing. It's "just ok" writing.
Plays like a tv series
Ridley is done
Too long/bloated
Semi smartly written but starving for a better cast of capable unknowns
Self congratulatory at every turn
"First man here on mountain" - "I colonized it" etc...
Film's bad qualities didnt even leave enough room to fill in the blanks like an old b movie cuz they "kind of did ok with the sets"
Highlight so far is abba song
Totally shouldnt have used bowie
Jeff daniels on the potty pooing a squeak and laughing with frazzled hair and legs jacked out in front if him.
Chick from halt and catch fire was an annoyingly familiar touch to casting
Film has a big ego about itself
I stopped caring early on but still marched through the duration
Do i get a prize?
Still marching, lets find out...
OK, so I get to the end and guess what?
It's more self congratulatory nonsense.
This makes me wonder whether or not watching "The Right Stuff" again will change my mind about NASA based movies. Maybe I'd better keep the memory alive with a positive recollection and not watch it. Actually, who am I kidding? I won't dare compare the two.
The Martian thinks very highly of itself, there is no mistaking this with anything else. That is the blunt truth. Was it entertaining? A few moments early on intrigued me, like when he figured out how to grow his own food and some of his brain work about planning for the future. But it didn't keep up with that same ingenuity. I struggled through this movie.
I had a very high confidence for The Martian when I did a blind buy of this blu ray I am looking at right now, about to literally crack in half with the butt end of a steak knife. I really did think that this would be a solid purchase and that I would have faith restored in Ridley Scott as a true visionary director for this decade, back in peak form. I do not know for the life of me why I thought this, but I did. I think Ridley has done his "big" work and is just enjoying the studio system now and letting the kids run wild. But it hurts me to witness this. I still expect a good movie. I do not trust his sensibilities anymore. It's official. Where is Walter Hill and Co when you need them? Just kidding. Not really, though.
Luckily I only payed 8 dollars with free shipping for this blu ray, so shattering the disc won't hurt as bad as my valuable time did with a weeknight movie watch timetable.
Honestly, I'm being dramatic. It's fine, ...whatever.
What can I do about it?
Nothing.
It just wasn't a good movie.
]
Boo hoo.
Director: Ridley Scott (seriously?)
I'm not going to save any surprise rating for the end of this review like The Martian saved it's payoff for me. This movie kind of sucks and I'll tell you why I think that.
The following text in red are the notes I was keeping on my smartphone, while I watched;
The martian
Jeff daniels on toilet dumb and dumber- couldnt take him seriously
"Im a botanist"
Clumsily convenient with video journal exposition. Makes me like "Moon" that much better.
Tonally awkward. Lighthearted is ok but not 140 mins worth. Hello netflix series. Just checked the remaining time counter..ugh..yup 140 mins and still a while to go
Bereft of actual emotion
Kids pretending to have feelings
Common trait in current wave of want to be actors. Zero charisma. Make pretend intellect. Wonder if the writer is really happy aside from the money? Who cares, it isn't even good writing. It's "just ok" writing.
Plays like a tv series
Ridley is done
Too long/bloated
Semi smartly written but starving for a better cast of capable unknowns
Self congratulatory at every turn
"First man here on mountain" - "I colonized it" etc...
Film's bad qualities didnt even leave enough room to fill in the blanks like an old b movie cuz they "kind of did ok with the sets"
Highlight so far is abba song
Totally shouldnt have used bowie
Jeff daniels on the potty pooing a squeak and laughing with frazzled hair and legs jacked out in front if him.
Chick from halt and catch fire was an annoyingly familiar touch to casting
Film has a big ego about itself
I stopped caring early on but still marched through the duration
Do i get a prize?
Still marching, lets find out...
OK, so I get to the end and guess what?
It's more self congratulatory nonsense.
This makes me wonder whether or not watching "The Right Stuff" again will change my mind about NASA based movies. Maybe I'd better keep the memory alive with a positive recollection and not watch it. Actually, who am I kidding? I won't dare compare the two.
The Martian thinks very highly of itself, there is no mistaking this with anything else. That is the blunt truth. Was it entertaining? A few moments early on intrigued me, like when he figured out how to grow his own food and some of his brain work about planning for the future. But it didn't keep up with that same ingenuity. I struggled through this movie.
I had a very high confidence for The Martian when I did a blind buy of this blu ray I am looking at right now, about to literally crack in half with the butt end of a steak knife. I really did think that this would be a solid purchase and that I would have faith restored in Ridley Scott as a true visionary director for this decade, back in peak form. I do not know for the life of me why I thought this, but I did. I think Ridley has done his "big" work and is just enjoying the studio system now and letting the kids run wild. But it hurts me to witness this. I still expect a good movie. I do not trust his sensibilities anymore. It's official. Where is Walter Hill and Co when you need them? Just kidding. Not really, though.
Luckily I only payed 8 dollars with free shipping for this blu ray, so shattering the disc won't hurt as bad as my valuable time did with a weeknight movie watch timetable.
Honestly, I'm being dramatic. It's fine, ...whatever.
What can I do about it?
Nothing.
It just wasn't a good movie.
]
Boo hoo.