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No no no, this is not the Tobe Hooper classic from the 80's. This is the horror remake cash grab of the last decade genre. I'm not going to compare this film to the original. I feel like that would be a bit unfair. Instead, I'll simply judge it on its own merits. But first...why did I bother to watch this film?
Well mofo, it's because the house they filmed at was literally down the street from my high school. I've driven past that house many-a-times. In the IMDB trivia section, you'll notice the director claims that the house is actually haunted. Nope, pure marketing that has obviously failed. There is simply not a single bit of haunt to be found in the home. I smirked every time they showed the exterior or the streets. American flags? White picket fences? Mailboxes for each individual house at the end of their driveway? These things do not exist in this suburb. This is Hollywood magic people....oh yeah, Rockwell was really cool off-set too, also kind of short. I digress.
I would love to continue to talk about the shooting of the film (how one guy was probably paid an obscene amount of money to be the 'garbage wrangler'), because that would be more interesting than what the Hollywood-ized Horror System has given us. Poltergeist is a shallow remake with; no scares, tension, surprises or people that seem to give a damn. Rockwell in my opinion looks like he is literally sleepwalking through the role. The amount of "this is for a paycheque" written on his face is undeniable. Rosemarie Dewitt, who plays his wife, does seem like she cares though. She agreed to do this film because her husband was in The Conjuring and she witnessed first hand the type of fear it struck in the audience. She wanted to be apart of that experience....unfortunately she decided to star in Poltergeist.
The film simply feels unnecessary. It brings absolutely nothing new to the table. Why am I paying to see this film? If I'm not paying, why am I dedicating two hours of my life to watching this? There is no answer because Kenan doesn't deliver anything of note here. We have a by the numbers PG-13 Horror flick shot in 3D. Yes, expect to see some "coming at the screen" moments, which make me cringe in embarrassment and a little bit of disappointment, considering Kenan also had a hand in the animated haunted house flick, Monster House.
October 4th
Poltergeist
Directed By: Gil Kenan
Poltergeist
Directed By: Gil Kenan
No no no, this is not the Tobe Hooper classic from the 80's. This is the horror remake cash grab of the last decade genre. I'm not going to compare this film to the original. I feel like that would be a bit unfair. Instead, I'll simply judge it on its own merits. But first...why did I bother to watch this film?
Well mofo, it's because the house they filmed at was literally down the street from my high school. I've driven past that house many-a-times. In the IMDB trivia section, you'll notice the director claims that the house is actually haunted. Nope, pure marketing that has obviously failed. There is simply not a single bit of haunt to be found in the home. I smirked every time they showed the exterior or the streets. American flags? White picket fences? Mailboxes for each individual house at the end of their driveway? These things do not exist in this suburb. This is Hollywood magic people....oh yeah, Rockwell was really cool off-set too, also kind of short. I digress.
I would love to continue to talk about the shooting of the film (how one guy was probably paid an obscene amount of money to be the 'garbage wrangler'), because that would be more interesting than what the Hollywood-ized Horror System has given us. Poltergeist is a shallow remake with; no scares, tension, surprises or people that seem to give a damn. Rockwell in my opinion looks like he is literally sleepwalking through the role. The amount of "this is for a paycheque" written on his face is undeniable. Rosemarie Dewitt, who plays his wife, does seem like she cares though. She agreed to do this film because her husband was in The Conjuring and she witnessed first hand the type of fear it struck in the audience. She wanted to be apart of that experience....unfortunately she decided to star in Poltergeist.
The film simply feels unnecessary. It brings absolutely nothing new to the table. Why am I paying to see this film? If I'm not paying, why am I dedicating two hours of my life to watching this? There is no answer because Kenan doesn't deliver anything of note here. We have a by the numbers PG-13 Horror flick shot in 3D. Yes, expect to see some "coming at the screen" moments, which make me cringe in embarrassment and a little bit of disappointment, considering Kenan also had a hand in the animated haunted house flick, Monster House.