+3
Wow, this thread is blowing up. Nice topic. I'll respond with an anecdote.
Music and art have both been very important to me through my entire life. Unfortunately, I tend to be kind of an OCD perfectionist while at the same time being terribly shy. At least for music, I always had it in my head that some song had to be studio quality on first draft. Period. The guitar or vocals had to meet my imaginary definition of perfection before I could share it with anyone. Needless to say, not much was ever shared. I'd compare something I came up with to Soundgarden, for instance. Or I couldn't hit Chris Cornell's vocal range and, as a result, I considered myself an absolute failure at the effort. That, in turn, would push me farther into my corner of creative isolation. That started in highschool. I figured I could do it, but not perfectly. If not perfectly, then I felt others would judge me and recognize me for the failure I saw in myself. This created all kinds of stage fright and confidence issues having defeated myself well before even making an effort.
It has taken me 20+ years now to slowly break that down! One step has been to just listen to other amateur musicians (especially helpful that YouTube is full of them) to 1) have a more realistic comparison for where I am musically, and 2) to see the overflowing support these people get from people that don't even know them. It has me questioning that maybe people aren't as judgmental as I am on myself. That helps.
Another step for me has been to listen to as many demo recordings as I can find from the bands I love. Spotify really helps with that as many albums had some kind of deluxe version. There is an extended Super Deluxe version of Soundgarden's album, Superunknown. On it is a rehearsal recording of The Day I Tried to Live. Listening to that you would never believe it was Soundgarden but, instead, some crappy college cover band. A lot of that was recorded on a home 8-track in the bedroom or whatever. Some are recorded just on a single room mic, and it shows. Doing this has helped me to see that everything good starts rough. That my idols are not inherently perfect. Voices crack. Guitarists have no idea what the solo is yet so they fumble through a few key notes. Quality sucks and constantly fades in and out as they move about the room. It's real stuff and far from the polished final version heard on the album. It's very similar to how young people look at fashion magazine covers and assume that they should also look like the same marketable "perfection" without recognizing the hundreds of shots taken to find this one composition or the hours of edits through Photoshop to stylize the shot even further hiding blemishes and annihilating any remnants of flaw. It is unrealistic and devastating for most, especially anyone already full of self doubt.
Third, just starting a project has helped a great deal. The first time I tried to record a cover I thought it sucked! It did. Terribly. That discouraged me very much; however, an hour later with 10-20 more takes I was much looser and felt warmed up. My sound was better for it. The anxiety was easing and I remembered that everything is a draft to be studied and improved upon. Nothing is perfect, or even really "right" the first time. Why I can't remember that I've no idea, but there it is. Now, I make edits very casually or just completely rerecord a part because nothing is as precious as I used to believe it to be. Let it break. You can fix it, no?
Finally (and this is a big part), create some sort of network safety net of support. Find a small circle of friends or even online groups that you can share ideas with. Ping thoughts back and forth. Ideally, they will have similar interests and can recognize the fragility of honest criticisms necessary to both help move you forward while keeping things positive and real with the dialogue. They may not like something but that's cool But they may offer other ways to approach the matter if you feel stuck. That's something you can't really do alone. The good thing here is that you're already asking how to shift your perspective by posting this thread so you're already on the right trail, IMO.
Finally finally, mimic for as long as you need to to learn, but eventually use those lessons to discover your thing and to refine your thing. So what that Joe Bob has a multi-platinum album. Write a song for the song's sake and for creativity's sake and for your enjoyment and closure. Don't write for multi-platinum goals.
__________________
"My Dionne Warwick understanding of your dream indicates that you are ambivalent on how you want life to eventually screw you." - Joel
"Ever try to forcibly pin down a house cat? It's not easy." - Captain Steel
"I just can't get pass sticking a finger up a dog's butt." - John Dumbear