Worst Joke Wins

How to fix your phone when it gets wet?

Put in your phone in a bowl of rice.Rice will attract Asians who will fix your phone.

__________________
"Anything less than immortality is a complete waste of time."

You got that from Facebook.

How can you tell that you're in a lesbian bar?

Even the pool table doesn't have any balls.

That gets an 18.

Why does Piglet smell so bad?

Because he's always playing with Pooh.

Glorious one. 19.

What's worse than a baby on the stake? A baby on 10 stakes.

__________________
Look, I'm not judging you - after all, I'm posting here myself, but maybe, just maybe, if you spent less time here and more time watching films, maybe, and I stress, maybe your taste would be of some value. Just a thought, ya know.

UPDATE: The Page 1 Winning Joke:

How does Moses make his tea?

Hebrews it!

It scored an 18 1/2.

Hey, that's mine! I must be very punny.

^

Why did the dinosaur go to bed?
His eyes were saur.

^ 8.

Here's a joke I made. It's very short:

I'm handsome.

Why does Mickey Mouse when he spins?

Because the higher he flies, the much.

Hey, you asked!

__________________

What did the butt say to the other butt?
Dude your such an a$$hole.

Why did Anne Frank cross the road?

Because the nazis were after her.


.....Sorry!

__________________
#31 on SC's Top 100 Mofos list!!

^ 3

Why do the Chicago Cubs still try to win the World Series

No ****ing clue.

__________________

“The gladdest moment in human life, methinks, is a departure into unknown lands.” – Sir Richard Burton

Attachments

 

Why did the blonde stare at the apple juice for 9 hours?

It said concentrate

Not realistic: a blonde is not able to concentrate that long.


Now I find it funnier


-> 4/10

That joke was so bad it killed the thread for five years.

__________________
Iro's Top 100 Movies v3.0

A dog walks into a bar and orders a drink.

The bartender says "Holy crap, a talking dog!!! You should join the circus!!"

The dog says "Why? Do they need an electrician?"

__________________
"A laugh can be a very powerful thing. Why, sometimes in life, it's the only weapon we have."

Suspect's Reviews