Create an Absurdly Ultimate Collector's Edition

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The Very "Special" Edition


Comes complete with...



DNA

To make your very own child that looks like this:


* Blind girlfriend to love your deformed child not included.

****Also includes a Cher outfit (while supplies last)****



"Money won is twice as sweet as money earned."



Here's a special edition of Casablanca:



It comes with signed letters of transit, redeemable for a one way flight for two to the destination of your choice.



Don't worry about blackout dates, or whether or not they actually give you the authority to board a flight. It doesn't matter. Because they're signed.

Plus, when you purchase this edition of the film, you'll also get Paris.



They're really making you an offer you can't refuse.....wait.....that's a different film.



planet news's Avatar
Registered User
@ the previous two posts:

VERTIGO



comes with ... MAKE-UP KIT!



Now all of us can objectify women we know into the ideal Madeleines of our fantasies!

Also, as a bonus, you get a FREE NEON-GREEN BAY WINDOW SET!



So if the make-up doesn't work, you can at least keep her in the dark and admire her silhouette!
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"Loves them? They need them, like they need the air."



I'd suggest a super-duper version of Inception with a top, but who here doesn't think they're actually going to make that one a reality?

Maybe they can toss in a pillow, too.
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\m/ Fade To Black \m/


Comes with a group of annoying Paparazzi that will try to kill you.

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~In the event of a Zombie Uprising, remember to sever the head or destroy the brain!~

~When im listening to Metallica, Nothing else matters~

N3wt's Movie Reviews New DVD Thread Top-100



Planes, Trains and Automobiles



Complete with Two Pillows!

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"Yeah, but your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn't stop to think if they should." - Dr. Ian Malcolm, Jurassic Park.



The Cying Game

Comes with a small penis (picture not allowed due to forum rules).
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“The gladdest moment in human life, methinks, is a departure into unknown lands.” – Sir Richard Burton



Sixteen Candles:
The "We Didn't Forget This Time" Special Edition

Everyone remembers Molly Ringwald in the 1984 John Hughes classic, Sixteen Candles, about a girl whose family forgot her 16th birthday. Well, with this new "We Didn't Forget This Time" Special Edition DVD, we made sure we didn't forget to include anything, like:

1. Official Molly Ringwald Panties -- you'll be the hit of the locker room when you proudly exit a stall holding up a pair of panties that Molly Ringwald wore herself. We made sure Molly wore these for a WHOLE day before she took them off and gave them to our suppliers -- and speaking of supplies, there's only 16 copies available with these. (Official Price: $1,600 for a copy of this very special edition, comes with a Blu-ray.)



2. Sixteen Candles and a Birthday Cake Mix -- for your very own birthday. Chocolate cake mix only.

3. Sex Quiz -- take the very popular sex quiz that was being passed around Samantha Baker's school. Answer questions like, "Who would you do it with?" Comes on a sheet of paper and it's on a CD-rom so you can pass it around to all of your Facebook friends.

4. Enema Bag -- never leave home without it! Samantha's grandparents certainly didn't.

5. Neck Brace -- go to school Joan Cusack style with a fashionable neck brace. And while we're at it, we'll throw in a...



6. Really Bizarre Shirt -- like the one Joan wears in this scene. It has the woman in the white dress with the fabric that you lift up to allow you to see the woman's bare legs and underwear. Perfect for wiping your face after a visit to the water fountain.

7. Polaroid Camera -- say "Cheese!" after a night of fun. Get evidence that you were hanging out with the really hot, popular girl.

8. Floppy Disks -- you and your geek friends love them.

9. Birth Control Pills -- get drunk and give them to the geek that's driving you around town.

10. Long Duck Dong Baby Alive Doll -- your very own miniature Long Duck Dong doll that you have to feed like a Baby Alive Doll because "The Donger need food". You'll be forced to take it with you to the dance where it might run off with a very tall and very busty female athlete and eventually get into all kinds of chaos, including losing a car in a big lake.



11. $1 bill -- in case you don't purchase the extra special edition with Molly Ringwald's panties, the entrance fee to see the pair of panties purchased by a more obsessed Sixteen Candles fan is on us! Provided the entrance fee hasn't gone up (it might have, considering we're talking about 1984 prices, here).

12. Sixteen Candles Yearbook -- a yearbook so you can always remember your friends from Sixteen Candles. Perfect for looking up pictures of Molly Ringwald.

13. A Wish That Will Come True -- make a wish upon purchasing this special edition of Sixteen Candles and it WILL come true! Probably before you even bake the chocolate Sixteen Candles cake and light the 16 candles.

14. Virginity -- become a virgin again thanks to the power of this Sixteen Candles special edition! It'll make you ready to get it on with the person whose name you wrote down in the "Sex Quiz". Be prepared, though -- the power of this DVD will erase any children you've had and any STD's you've picked up along the way.

15. Classic 1980's Rock Band Posters -- to decorate your bedroom with so you can feel like Samantha and her friends in the 80's!

and finally...

16. "Boost Your Memory" Book -- a copy of a book that's designed to help boost your memory so you and your loved ones won't forget anything important... like birthdays!

All for only $84.99! ($1,600 if you buy one of the 16 copies with Molly Ringwald's panties)

Get Yours Today!



^^^^^^^ Boy, that DVD will be in the Wal-Mart $5 bargain bin, soon.