Silly News Items Not Covered In The Shoutbox That Don't Warrant Individual Threads

Who would pay £200,000 for a flat the size of a dining room table?

A flat opposite Harrods has gone on sale for £200,000. It doesn't sound a bad price, especially given the swanky location, until you discover that this flat is only marginally larger than a dining room table.

It is said to be a former cupboard, converted in the property boom of the 1980s, but with internal measurements of 11 ft by 5.5 ft, there's no 'former' about it. This is a cupboard with pretensions.

So why would anyone pay £200,000 for a cupboard?

The current owner says it has been a godsend, saving him a hellish commute from Bath to London every day.

He claims to have plenty of space. He even boasts that he can lie on his bed and do the cleaning. In theory, he has everything he needs, He has two rooms (if you can call them rooms), a bed and a bathroom.

However, he has no natural light, or space to swing a cat, and his home is somehow worth £35,000 more than the price of the average home in Britain.

Clearly the price of this particular property is deeply insane. It's a sign that a swanky address in London still attracts pointless and meaninglessly high prices, but while there are people around the world looking for this sort of property in this sort of place, there's no need for prices to fall.

It's a frustrating sign that buyers anywhere really desirable will be competing with the sort of people who have such deep pockets that no price is ever going to be too high for them.

It's a sign that normal people will always have to compromise, commute further, and live in slightly more dodgy places - or opt for a cupboard.

There's nothing cheerful about this property tale.

However, if you are really attracted by this kind of living, you can check out the swanky postcodes on this site and see what's in your price range. Alternatively, I can recommend a cupboard a few miles away for less than £50 a month (as long as you don't mind it being big and yellow).

Texas Strip Club's Battle Over 'Pole Tax'

A row over whether strip clubs in Texas should have to charge a $5 entrance fee has become the subject of a bizarre battle in the state's Supreme Court. Clubs say the fee - known as the "pole tax" - is unconstitutional.

Chief Justice Wallace Jefferson asked lawyers for the strip clubs: "Is it proper or not for the state to have the position that live nude dancing should be discouraged?

"Is it unconstitutional for the state to target live nude dancing because it believes it's culturally unsound, immoral?"

The admission fee was introduced three years ago with the income intended to fund programmes for sexual assault victims.

The Texas Entertainment Association, which represents strip clubs across the state, sued and a district judge struck down the law in 2008.

Another court then ruled that the tax improperly singles out one form of expression, nude dancing, for regulation.

The estimated $13m (about £8.7m) already collected in fees is being held in an account pending the outcome of the legal battle.

Figures from the state's accountants show that around 2.7 millions strip club customers have paid the fee since it took effect, although many clubs ignore the fee.

The case is being watched closely by authorities in New York and Georgia which have proposed a similar fee on clubs.

In Texas, the law applies specifically to strip clubs that sell alcohol.

Because the state could ban both practices, solicitor general James Ho told the nine Republican justices, the fee was justified.

He said: "It would be turning the first amendment on its head to say that you can criminalise but can't impose a modest regulation."

Much of the debate focused on the dancers' right to "freedom of expression".

Their lawyer, Craig Enoch, was asked what exactly nude dancers express in their shows.

"Eroticism," he replied. "It's seeking to create emotion."

A ruling is not expected for several months.

Simon Pegg Tweets and Jet Bike Steve is Born

A new aquatic adventure film is setting the Internet alight, with fan groups, merchandise and artwork springing up at an incredible rate. The only thing is, the film didn't exist outside of the imagination of Shaun of the Dead star Simon Pegg until 7.22am, March 23rd, with this tweet:

"I'm gonna write a film about jet bikes. I like them, they go fast on the sea. I play the main character, Jet Bike Steve. That's all so far."

Welcome, then, to the Internet phenomenon that is Jet Bike Steve, it might be the first movie to be greenlit on the back of a throwaway 140 character joke.

Speaking to Lauren Laverne on 6music on Friday, Pegg spoke of the growing support for JBS: "I was walking through Crouch End and I thought: 'I love jet bikes, I wish I could be in a film about jet bikes', and I tweeted about it... then it just took off and everybody went nuts."

Jet Bike Steve now has a Facebook page, a Wikipedia page, its own Action Figure and its own artwork popping up here, here, here and here (there will be more by the time you read this). You can also keep up to date with the ongoing adventures of Jet Bike Steve by following @realjbs on twitter.

It wouldn't be the first time fans have willed a whole film into existence based on little more than a concept. Robert Rodriquez's upcoming film, Machete, starring Danny Trejo started life as a trailer for a fake film stuck onto the Rodriquez/Tarantino experiment, Grindhouse.

So, the Internet buzz is in full flow, can the momentum last all the way to a cinema release and does this sound like a film you'd like to see? Or is it just another case of the Internet jumping on an amusing concept without any thought for the outcome (We're looking at you, Snakes on a Plane).

Seth Rogen has been named Hollywood’s hardest working actor, according to a poll compiled by Forbes magazine.

The ‘Knocked Up’ star came top of the list, which looked at nearly 600 films released between January 2005 and December 2009. Those who had the most starring roles and whose films earned the most money ended up on the list.

With twelve films to his name, including ‘Superbad’, ‘The 40-Year-Old Virgin’ and ‘Kung-Fu Panda – Rogen was at number one after his movies earned over £580 million.

In second place was Morgan Freeman. While his nine films over that period grossed £760 million, he only co-starred in a number of them.

Matt Damon was in third place, thanks to roles in ‘The Bourne Ultimatum’ and ‘The Departed’. Will Ferrell and Robert Downey Jr rounded out the top five.

Dame Helen Mirren wishes Hollywood would stop casting British actors as villains.

The Oscar winning actress believes British actors are “an easy target” to be cast as villains in Hollywood blockbusters.

She said, “I think it's rather unfortunate that the villain in every movie is always British.

"It's just nice to say we're not snooty, stuck-up, malevolent, malignant creatures as we're often portrayed.

"We're actually kind of cool and hip!"

Mirren made the comments at an LA event, which celebrated British success in Hollywood.

YouTube has started to remove popular Hitler parodies of the German film ‘Downfall’, which chronicles the last days of the Nazi dictator, over a copyright issue.

The 2004 drama features a scene in which Bruno Ganz as Hitler rants in his Berlin bunker about his army’s failure to repel a Russian attack on the city. But it has led to a series of parodies, with users inserting new subtitles in the clip.

There are around 70 comedy versions of the scene, with one of the more famous ones seeing Hitler bemoan his inability to access X-Box LIVE, while another finds him disgusted at how poor the eagerly-awaited ‘Avatar’ trailer was.

Despite the film’s director Oliver Hirschbiegel conceding that he enjoys the parodies, Constantin Film has demanded that video sharing sites remove the clips.

Over 800 blonde women have marched through the Latvian capital of Riga.

According to AFP, the event was organised with the aim of cheering up locals during the country's current economic crisis.

Student Linda, 19, said: "I feel very good to be surrounded by so many beautiful women. It's great to be blonde."

Another blonde helper Ilze added: "It is just great to do something positive in Latvia and at the same time promote blondes as being fun, positive, intelligent people."

New Zealander Clint, 26, who travelled from Britain for the event, said: "After seeing last year's parade in the news, I knew this was something I could not afford to miss!"

The march marked the end of a week-long blonde celebration, with money collected during the festivities being donated to local charities.

A 60-year-old man has completed a five-year car-free pub crawl after visiting every establishment listed in the Good Beer Guide.

Real ale fan Stuart Ashby of Shoreham, West Sussex, drank a pint in each of the 700 pubs named in the 1990 edition of the book, finishing at The Lamb in Yapton, the Daily Mail reports.

Ashby said: "When there is no public transport I hitch-hike. I don't think anything of it. Enough people stop to get me from A to B and people are interested when they find out where I am going.

"I do a lot of walking, which stops me putting on more weight than I would otherwise. If it needs doing then I'll travel as far as I have to by whatever means to make it to a pub on the guide."

He added: 'I've had some wonderful times and some scary times. I once travelled to a pub in South Bermondsey and the place was shut at 5pm so I banged on the door for a bit only to be greeted by a very angry man and his shotgun.

"I left that one pretty quickly. I did go back later, very discreetly, because I had to have a pint from there so I could cross it off my list."

The most remote pub on his journey was an establishment off the coast of Devon on Lundy Island, requiring a four-hour ferry trip.

The co-founder of a 3D film technology company has suggested that pornography will be a key driver in takeup of new TV sets.

Philippe Gerard's French company 3Dlized is working with adult-content producer Marc Dorcel on a new project, Reuters reports.

"Viewers reached out with their arms to the candies in the Haribo adverts in theatres," Gerard said. "When boobs pop out of the screen it's the same - people reach out to touch them."

Dorcel's chief executive Gregory Dorcel said that its 3D output will be available to viewers paying a monthly subscription of €20-30 (£17-25).

A number of soothsayers have made their predictions about the upcoming FIFA World Cup in South Africa.

Nigerian seer John Adatiri, 78, admitted that he had not forecast football tournaments before but predicted a strong showing for his home country after looking at a two-sided mirror, Reuters reports.

Adatiri said: "Nigeria go play quarter-final. Brazil go win."

Meanwhile, Zulu witchdoctor Sebenzile Nsukwini, 33, cast animal bones and sea shells and predicted a "strong" showing for hosts South Africa, despite their outsider status.

However, despite the blessing of Johannesburg's Soccer City stadium, football reporter Linda Moreotsene from Sowetan expressed scepticism about the idea of managers using 'muti' (traditional South African medicine) to help their teams to victory.

Moreotsene said: "All the muti stuff was before my time. I can't say I've seen any smoke or herbs being burnt in the changing rooms. Many of the top sides have got European coaches now and they don't think much of that sort of thing."

Traditional bifocals could become a thing of the past with the invention of electronic glasses that automatically adjust to let their wearer view objects at different distances.

The spectacles, which are due to be launched in the US this year and the UK next year, use lenses that change their strength when a small electrical current passes through them.

A layer of liquid crystal sandwiched inside each lens alters its refractive properties according to the current applied, adapting the focal length according to where the wearer is looking.

Traditional bifocals, which use two lenses of different strengths in front of each eye, have been used by people who are struggle to focus on both near and far objects ever since they were believed to have been invented by Benjamin Franklin, the American statesman, in the 1780s.

But some users complain of headaches and dizziness while the small field of view forces them to move their heads while reading.

The electronic glasses, which have been developed by US firm PixelOptics, can be adjusted manually to view objects at different distances by pressing a button on the side of the frames.

Unlike traditional bifocals, which only allow the wearer to focus "near" or "far", the electronic lenses have a range of in-between settings.

The focal length can also change automatically when motion sensors embedded in the frames detect that the wearer is looking down – to read a book, for example.

Trials are under way in the US and the developer hopes to launch the glasses by the end of 2010 before bringing them to the UK by the middle of next year.

Peter Zieman, director of European sales for PixelOptics, said: "We have been developing these glasses for the past 10 years.

"Liquid crystals can change their refractive index when an electrical charge is put through them, so wearers can switch between distance and reading in the time it takes to blink.

"Putting in the kind of motion sensors that are used in the iPhone also allows the glasses to sense when someone is reading a book or a newspaper and so change the focal distance of the lenses automatically.

"In essence, glasses haven't changed all that much since they were first invented. The most recent development was transition lenses that tint in sunlight, but even that was 15 years ago.

"Our glasses bring modern technology to an old solution."

There's a lot to love about being single. You save money on Valentine's Day gifts, you get to meet new and interesting people and sometimes you even get to have sex with them.

But it's not all knocking boots and freedom. There are some aspects of single life that might, in fact, be seen as less than desirable. And then there are these five facts that will make you wish you got married in high school ...

#5. You Get Paid Less


Single People Tell Themselves:

Of course my married co-workers take home a little more scratch than me! They tend to be older and lamer, and most corporate pay-scales are directly tied to how old and lame you are.


The Truth:

You've got one part right: Your married co-workers take home more money. Just how much you're getting cornholed depends on who you ask, but a recent study pegged it at about 27 percent.

But it's not just age. The above study was based on identical twins where the bachelor was just as educated as his married dopelganger. In fact, even if you and a married man do the same job at the same level of competence for the same number of years, the guy with the ring takes home more than you.


There are a couple of possible explanations for this and, contrary to what you might want to believe, none of them involve your boss being jealous of your electrifying sex life. The explanation married guys are most likely to cite is a little old fashioned elbow grease. It's hard not to hustle when the option behind door number two is "let your wife and kids starve to death." Meanwhile, single guys are more likely to take a sick day to sleep off an especially bad hangover, or quit a great job because the nachos in the cafeteria suck.

And even if your married co-worker is the slap dick and you're the responsible one, the perception still may not change. From your boss's perspective, that guy's money is going toward feeding his kids. Yours could be going toward any number of elicit activities he's vaguely aware of. One of those sex parties he's seen on those HBO documentaries, perhaps.

#4. You Work More


Single People Tell Themselves:

In an unprecedented act of kindness, American corporations decided their employees were working too hard and began enforcing something called "work/life balance." Of course they had their selfish reasons. A happier employee will do better work, and get sick less. But who cares? Less work means more time for us single folk to go out and have indiscriminate sex with one another, right?

The Truth:

If you're single, work/life balance is yet another way for the world to punish you for being unloved. One way the "balance" is enforced is the Family and Medical Leave Act, which gives any employee the right to take time off if a spouse, child or parent gets sick.


But what if you're struggling to save up enough money for a ring for your girlfriend of seven years when she gets hit by a bus? According to work/life balance, you'd better have some vacation time saved up. Otherwise, you're just going to have to learn to weep a little quieter, because you're sort of bumming out the rest of the folks in Accounts Receivable.


There's also the unofficial considerations. Married employees simply have more legitimate excuses to ask for time off: a kid's birthday party, an anniversary dinner, Christmas. Yes, single people are more likely to be asked to work on holidays. The logic goes: You're single, you don't have a wife or kids, what could you possibly have to do? It doesn't matter if you were planning to spend the day delivering presents to sick children. Someone's got to pick up the slack for the married guy who keeps taking time off to attend his daughter's dance recital.


But don't worry too much about vacation time. Thanks to something called per person double occupancy (PPDO), you wouldn't be able to go on good vacations anyways. Essentially, hotels, cruise lines, pretty much anything that isn't a plane or a train, is designed and priced for couples. The travel industry wants as many people as possible roaming the streets in a capitalist frenzy. The more people they can pack into a hotel or a cruise ship, the happier they are. If that means punishing you for being unloved, so be it. Maybe you'll learn not to be so lonely next time.

#3. The Government Hates You


Single People Tell Themselves:

The tax code has something called the "marriage penalty," which is supposed to make married couples pay more. See? Uncle Sam remembers what it was like to be a squirrel trying to get a nut.

The Truth:

Actually, 51 percent of married couples get a tax bonus, and it can be up to $1300 a freaking year. Just enough for your co-worker to take his wife on that Hawaiian vacation while you do all his work.


The benefit comes if there's an income disparity; i.e. one partner is making more than the other. If they're pulling in the mad bucks and their spouse is working a part time job, or just a full-time job that sucks, they wind up paying less. You're stuck with the full tab.

To add a little salt to the hemorrhaging wound in your bank account, married couples can choose to file jointly or separately. So they have plenty of wiggle room to get the lowest taxes possible. So basically, instead of getting a tax break, you're doing the equivalent of buying another wedding gift for all the happily married couples you know every April 14th.


And if you think the government's a dick to private citizens around tax time, you should try fighting wars for them. You might expect the military to pay people who get shot at pretty well, regardless of whether or not they're married. But in fact, a soldier with a ring on their finger is entitled to an extra $250 a month based on a piece of legislation left over from WWI called Family Separation Allowance. They also get an increased housing allowance, which is untaxed money. So basically, married soldiers get bigger houses and enough money to install a jacuzzi in the backyard. But hey, at least you single folks get to play the field in Iraq.


#2. People Hate You


Single People Tell Themselves:

Fine, so I'm poor, over-worked and my government hates me. So what? That doesn't mean I should rush into anything. Only fools rush in! Elivis said that, and he was practically a genius. It's not like I should shack up with the next biologically viable human being I pass on the street, right? Right?


The Truth:

Rutgers University did a study that gathered empirical data of social stigma associated with being single and, well ... it's not pretty. Single men were viewed as being stupid and dishonest, and single women were more likely to be harassed and treated badly at restaurants. In fact, the study yielded so much material, that report we linked up there runs 58 freaking pages.

Even with the divorce rate hovering around 50 percent, marriage is still considered the norm. And if you're single for too long, there's a chance you'll stay that way.


Time spent single is a lot like time spent in the bathroom. It's the most natural thing in the world, until you're there just a moment too long. But once you hit that point, there's no turning back. People start to wonder what's wrong with you. Gross images start popping into their heads. The next time they see you, you might smell a little funny to them. But hey, look on the bright side, at least nothing's actually wrong with you, right?

#1.You Are Going to Die Soon


Single People Tell Themselves:

Well, at least I have my health...

The Truth:

We'd hate to send the message that you single folks are all alone in this world, with nobody to rely on but yourself ... since you can't even rely on yourself, really. See, even your body hates you for being single.


Opinions vary on why single people are more likely to get sick and die. Some think it's because marriage offers moral support to get through the tough times. Others think it's just that a spouse is more likely to nag you into going to the doctor. Of course those are things you can counteract without getting married. Just buy a dog and schedule regular medical checkups, right?

But that won't change the fact that married people have a better immune systems than you. They don't have to be happily married. Even divorced people are better at fighting off illness. It's like marriage is an all purpose vaccination that never wears off.


You'd think the health care system would be designed to accommodate all the strange and fascinating diseases you single folks have waiting in your future. But married people get the better of that too, often choosing between two subsidized plans, and paying less per person. In fact, they get such a good deal that people literally get married just to get on their partner's health plan. While this might sound pathetic to you now, it will sound a lot more reasonable when you realize that the grapefruit sized lump on your neck isn't going to remove itself. If it does remove itself, you're probably going to have to go to the ER and get that **** stitched up.

But hey, happy Valentine's Day single people! You might want to hang onto all that money you're saving on gifts.

Snoop Dogg to swap hip-hop for soap opera as he begs agent to let him tread the cobbles of Coronation Street

It's not where you'd usually expect to find an international hip-hop star.

But Coronation Street could soon be welcoming a very special guest to its cobbles in the form of rapper Snoop Dogg.

The star has revealed that he begged his agent to get him a cameo on the soap opera having been a huge fan of the show for the past 11 years.

The rapper, real name Calvin Broadus, who visited Manchester today, said: 'I had my agent reach out to them to see if they could try to get me on and they said they were interested so hopefully it might happen.

'It would be perfect for me to be on the show. I've got friends around the world who always put me up on things and turn me on to things. Eleven years ago one of my friends turned me on to it.

'I love the whole dynamic, the way it is put together, it is my world, it is something I could fall into.

Handy man: Snoops grabs a roller brush and helps volunteers paint a wall at the Ordsall Community Center in Manchester

Snoop Dogg was speaking at the Ordsall Community Centre in Salford, where he met young volunteers who gave up four hours of their time to paint the centre in exchange for a ticket to the rap star's gig tonight at the Manchester Apollo through the Orange RockCorps scheme.

The 38-year-old was refused a visa to enter the UK in 2007 after a series of run-ins with the police.

But the ban was eventually lifted, allowing the bad boy of West Coast American rap to play at Glastonbury last week.

He said: 'One of the important things about me coming back into the UK was that I wanted to become real community active to show people that I really do care about the problems that are going on over here.

This is like a treat, to be able to do something constructive for your community, it feels good to be a part of it.

He was joined by Manchester United and England footballer Rio Ferdinand who made a surprise appearance at the community centre.

Snoop introduced him to the crowd as 'my nephew Rio' before the rapper played football with the teenage volunteers.

Ferdinand said: 'I am a huge Snoop fan so if I put in a bit of hard work, a bit of painting, I might get a ticket.'

Snoop Dogg is currently number one in the UK charts with the Katy Perry collaboration, California Gurls.

But the rap star did not even know he had hit the top spot and said: 'I've not bothered to look. Tell it like it is and not like it was.'

An unidentified flying object (UFO) disrupted air traffic over Zhejiang's provincial capital Hangzhou late on Wednesday, the municipal government said on Thursday.

Xiaoshan Airport was closed after the UFO was detected at around 9 pm, and some flights were rerouted to airports in the cities of Ningbo and Wuxi , said an airport spokesman, who declined to be named.

The airport had resumed operations, and more details will be released after an investigation, he said.

A source with knowledge of the matter, however, told China Daily on Thursday that authorities had learned what the UFO was after an investigation.

But it was not the proper time to publicly disclose the information because there was a military connection, he said, adding that an official explanation is expected to be given on Friday.

Inbound flights were diverted to the nearby airports in Zhejiang province's Ningbo and Jiangsu province's Wuxi. Outbound flights were delayed for three to four hours.

A staff member at the airport's information desk said the airport had "no idea" how many flights were affected by the closure.

At around 11 pm on Wednesday, a netizen wrote three entries announcing the airport's closure in

his microblog at Sina.com, but they were all soon deleted.

He posted an apology at midnight, saying the news had not been confirmed and asking those who had republished his earlier entries to delete them