Originally Posted by SamsoniteDelilah
I'd say there have been some slightly over the top responses to some newbs, but it's to new people who dive into posting with no regard for the tone of the place, for board ettiquette in general, for people who start off being rude themselves.
I think she's directing her comments specifically about one member, but I could be wrong. I agree with your above comments, but suffice it to say, they aren't
always characteristic of the veteran behavior you'll find on these boards. Thankfully, the majority of the Mofo crowd manages to keep things civil, fair-minded, and helpful whenever necessary - barring the occasional spat or two (which seem to have increased in frequency these past few months).
But occasionally, a member or two will
attack a new member, possibly under the annoyed expectation that said new member is a no-nothing dolt with no knowledge or respect for forum etiquette. I'm guilty of doing so on at least one occasion, of which I regret. Mofo is frequently visited by users who sign up, post one or two poorly constructed messages with seemingly little or no regard for proper grammar - and yes, that gets frustrating. It clutters the boards. It disrupts our usual, routine browsing and challenges our desire to find and read thoughtful posts. But as per the Terms of Service we've all signed, that gives no member the right to disrespect any new member for any reason, no matter how deficient they might seem.
I would list examples of this type of behavior to illustrate the need for my post here, but I'd rather not - by quoting - indict someone of improper behavior without warrant, particularly in a thread that never asked for it.
Originally Posted by SamsoniteDelilah
Pointing out that the search function works and is a respectful part of posting here...
Of course, but the search function should be pointed out in a kind and helpful manner, I'd argue. That might seem obvious, but it seems easy for some to smugly suggest using the search function, as if the new user should have known it was there anyway. To suggest the search function in this way is to unfairly accuse a new member of being lazy without proof, rather than simply being uninformed.
Originally Posted by SamsoniteDelilah
pointing out that people communicate as clearly as possible here...
Agreed, but once again, I think a distinction should be made. Not everyone is as proficient at producing concise, poignant, and grammatically correct writing as others. In fact, many develop that talent simply by posting continually on message boards such as these. I say let's afford new members the chance to learn to write and respond here, rather than expect it of them upon their first appearance.
Originally Posted by SamsoniteDelilah
pointing out that logic is expected and that anything presented as fact should be supportable with logic...
Yes, but again, I re-state my comment about learning and developing skills. Not everyone can construct, or even know how to begin constructing, a solid argument. Should that deficiency deny them the privilege to discuss films, and to participate on these message forums? We should take care that we don't unnecessarily alienate new members, and instead encourage them to post and to learn as they go.
Originally Posted by SamsoniteDelilah
these things are not "rude" or "mean". It is, in fact, a service to the rest of the board to hold the line of some standard of behaviour. Most of us come to mofo, as opposed to other places, because of the community here - and that includes the fact that the board is well-organized, and people communicate intelligently.
Agreed, and it should be said that
more than a few members here treat new members and old members with the same amount of respect, honesty, and fair-mindedness - which is certainly a testament to this forum's integrity.
Originally Posted by SamsoniteDelilah
Also, I thought you were joking about a message board being a place where "this kind of thing isn't supposed to happen". It would be nice if it didn't happen, agreed. But as message boards go, this one is waaaaaay at the polite and of the spectrum.
Agreed completely.
I haven't suggested my above thoughts because I believe the forum
needs them. I'm confident that everyone who frequents the boards here already knows what I'm talking about. Yet, it seems necessary sometimes to remind oneself and others about the code of conduct and degree of understanding which shouldn't just be expected of us, but heralded as well.
Originally Posted by SamsoniteDelilah
I would suggest, if people don't like the way that these things are being pointed out, that they point it out first, in the way they want it to be pointed out. Then there will be no need for the same people to make the same comments until they're blue in the face and they might not be so cranky.
I agree that the burden of change lies with the new member, and not with the forum. It's up to new members to adapt, and to "learn the ropes," and to express concerns whenever applicable. But I also feel that the old members, being the frequent visitors that they are - the life-givers who keep these forums active - retain the responsibility to make welcome new members, and to educate them fairly and respectfully as they make the adjustment. That way, new members - who might be the next respected "old members" - are encouraged to stay, rather than having to blindly mesh with a group who's been together for years. I'm sure we would all agree that this can be a difficult and potentially lonely transition for anyone. Some are less deficient than others, obviously, and require little or no help to get into the swing of things. But for my part, I'd argue that everyone deserves a chance before they're challenged for being inadequate after only two or three posts...
Reply to Topic
In my work, most alcoholics I have met are really nice people sober 
but drinking changes people, sometimes it isn't a pretty sight. 
for you gummy 
to u
without special powers to delete posts of course, but we could be the person that tells people to shut up or keep on track...anyway, it may come soon, if there is not one already.
