Sexy Cineplexy: Reviews

Nice reviews Sexy. I quite fancy catching Prisoners but might wait until it's out on DVD.

And Snow Cake sounds...interesting. So what role does Sigourney Weaver play? I didn't quite pick it up.

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Oh she's an autistic woman is she? I thought you'd perhaps have made mention of that in your review.

Oh and also when I first glanced at the review I was positive you had posted a photo of Ally Sheedy's character being dropped off at school in Breakfast Club. I was wondering how the hell that was going to tie into your review.

Sexy is an autistic reviewer.

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It's what you learn after you know it all that counts. - John Wooden
My IMDb page

Aspergers might be closer, but you never know.

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5-time MoFo Award winner.

Behind the Candelabra
(directed by Steven Soderbergh, 2013)



Good Will Hunting is a lot like Behind the Candelabra, except Robin Williams never bent his fat, hairy ass over for Matt Damon and told him to hop on daddy for a good ride. Nor did Matt Damon ever wake up to find Robin Williams looking down at his morning hard-on and licking his lips and saying, "Well, look who's up!" Can't say the same, though, for Michael Douglas in Behind the Candelabra, who plays Liberace in a Liberace biopic for HBO. The movie came out earlier this year, but I've just now seen it. It has to be seen to be believed.



The film is the GAYEST of gay movies. It makes Brokeback Mountain look like Rambo. Chuck Norris probably considers this his Kryptonite. By the end of the movie, I was roasting marshmallows because my TV had burst into flames thanks to this film. It's so flaming that I don't even think it's actually a movie -- I think it's a sun. It's got planets revolving around it.

Basically, it's a story about Liberace (Michael Douglas) and a young man who actually knew Liberace (and wrote a book about their life together) named Scott, who's played by Matt Damon. Scott is an orphan who's gone from foster home to foster home all of his life. He meets Liberace, thanks to his gay friend played by Scott Bakula, and they begin a daddy/son love affair, in which Liberace adopts Scott, buys him a fancy mansion, makes all his dreams come true -- all in exchange for several sex scenes in which we see Matt Damon pounding the hell out of Michael Douglas on a bed. Prop a cardboard cutout of Sharon Stone next to your television and you can just pretend that you're watching Basic Instinct 3.



Seriously, now -- a movie in which Matt Damon bangs the hell out of Michael Douglas playing Liberace??? I kept looking for Ben Affleck. I was like, "Please tell me Ben Affleck's hiding in the closet watching all of this business with Matt Damon porking a Michael Douglas Liberace." Just let me hear him moaning, at least. I also wondered when Jay and Silent Bob were gonna show up. But the film really is missing an extra something by not having Ben Affleck. It's like, come on, people! They didn't respect Liberace enough. Liberace would have wanted Ben Affleck there in the movie! Batman!

Dan Aykroyd also stars in this movie as Liberace's manager or something like that. No sex scenes with Dan Aykroyd, either. None as well for Scott Bakula, but he did look good walking around with hardly any clothes on. I think Matt Damon's Scott character was also supposed to be a lot younger than how old Matt Damon actually is. Actually, yes -- according to Wikipedia, he starts off in this movie as a 17 year old. So it's Matt Damon playing a 17 year old who gets it on with Michael Douglas playing Liberace. Right.



One of the conditions that Liberace gives to Matt Damon's Scott character, though, is that he has to have weird plastic surgeries to make Scott look like a younger version of Liberace. Rob Lowe plays the creepy plastic surgeon who cuts away at Matt Damon's face and gives him a freaky new look. We are treated to some rather graphic plastic surgery sequences which won't be anything new to you if you've ever seen such scenes on the TV show, Nip/Tuck.

Debbie Reynolds is also in this movie as Liberace's mother, whom Liberace doesn't particularly care for.

There are some nice musical moments in which we get to watch Michael Douglas ham it up and play Liberace performing on stage, running his ring adorned fingers all across the piano keys and schmoozing with the audience members. This is quite a transformation for Douglas, who has adopted (besides Matt Damon) a high pitched gay voice, mannerisms, demeanor, the works. He also has to show off a bad balding head, a terribly wrinkled face (which in one scene was used rather hilariously, intentionally or not), and he even turns a disturbingly greenish blue corpse shade late in the movie before Liberace dies. This is not the macho, sexy Michael Douglas of the past, but he actually still shows some gusto and virility in the gay Liberace sex scenes. It's a remarkable role for him.

We are also treated to Michael Douglas as Liberace lounging in bed with a poodle while watching and enjoying a particularly exciting hot gay porno movie. He also takes a trip with Matt Damon to an adult bookstore where he experiences some gloryhole fun in a private booth. (Perhaps Ben Affleck was on the other side of the gloryhole?)



Behind the Candelabra runs for two hours. It's definitely not the best movie out there. You know where it's gonna go -- eventually things will turn sour between Liberace and Matt Damon and he'll get his pert, beautiful ass (seen bare several times) kicked to the street while Liberace goes after the fresher meat. Eventually it dawns on Matt Damon finally that moving in with Liberace and becoming his adopted son wasn't for "FOREVER" as he had hoped. Eventually the gay penis moves on to new butt territory. It's the nature of the beast.

But, Behind the Candelabra is still something to get behind if you're in the mood for something a little more (or extremely more) out of the ordinary. If glamorous costumes and lights and pizzazz and Hollywood and Vegas and daddy/son roleplay can entice you, check out Behind the Candelabra, especially if you've got a fireman to watch it with.

Watched this myself a week or so ago and have written a review as well, but with the massive backlog of reviews no idea when it will see the light of day. Suffice to say that your review is a touch different from mine! Entertaining as always however.

If your review was similar to Sexy's, I would be worried about you.

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Here, if you have a milkshake, and I have a milkshake, and I have a straw. There it is, that's a straw, you see? You watching?. And my straw reaches acroooooooss the room, and starts to drink your milkshake... I... drink... your... milkshake!
-Daniel, There Will Be Blood

I knew from this paragraph that this would be a particularly good SC review. I really am looking forward to seeing this someday.

That has to go down as one of MoFo's best quotes.

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Children of a Lesser God
(directed by Randa Haines, 1986)



Children of a Lesser God is one of the greatest movies ever and it's a shame that it's been about twenty years since I last saw it. Now I see it with newer eyes. Now scenes play out differently for me and it all means so much more. Even though it's been a long time since I saw it, I remembered quite a bit about it vividly, but it felt due to be freshened in my mind.



The film is a romance between a new teacher (William Hurt) at a school for deaf and hard of hearing children and a young woman (Marlee Matlin) who was once a student there, but is now the school janitor. The woman, Sarah Norman, is a bright lady with a troubled past. She could do much better for herself, but she is filled with anger and a lack of interest in learning how to speak verbally. The teacher, James Leeds, falls in love with her and wants her to use her mouth to speak. Together, they have a romance that involves exploring each other's worlds -- one of hearing and one of silence.


Pic included here because DAMN is he sexy.

Beyond that, I don't know what else to really say. I can't say I've seen a lot of romantic movies, but I do think that of those I've seen, I'd rate this one as the best. Marlee Matlin, who is deaf in real life, won an Academy Award for Best Actress for this movie, beating out the likes of Sigourney Weaver, Jane Fonda, Kathleen Turner and Sissy Spacek. I don't think she won it out of sympathy for being deaf. Even if she did, it still went to the right person.



Children of a Lesser God is mind altering. A dive into a pool of emotions. A spellbinding look into the exotic animal known as human. The film features what I believe may possibly be real deaf and hard of hearing child actors (I am not exactly sure) and Piper Laurie (Carrie's mother in the original Carrie) as Sarah's estranged mother.

I am reading that there was so criticism regarding this movie when it came out -- apparently people like Roger Ebert thought the film was geared too much towards a hearing audience and should have included perhaps more silent moments and maybe some subtitles (William Hurt describes everything that Marlee Matlin signs). If you see the movie, I think you can see how this is not a problem. It works. This is an example of why I feel Roger Ebert truly isn't as magnificent as everyone makes him out to be. He claimed there was too much "soundtrack." Excuse me! Music is a whole part of Children of a Lesser God. Watch the scene where Marlee Matlin dances to music.

The soundtrack even includes The Pointer Sisters' "Jump (For My Love)."



Give Children of a Lesser God a watch sometime soon. Be sure to include it on your '80s MoFo Movies List. I may or may not have included it on mine (and if I haven't, then more people need to watch this and put it high on their list!)

Again -- Children of a Lesser God -- beautiful film. Magnificent romance.

MAD MAX 2:
The Road Warrior
(directed by George Miller, 1981)



First problem: Wez wore assless leather chaps -- why didn't Mel Gibson?

Second problem: Well... is there really a second problem?

I've seen The Road Warrior (aka Mad Max 2) twice now in my life. The first time was last year and I didn't really think it was all that great. NOW, though -- I think it's spectacular. Definitely the best of the three Mad Max movies (soon to be four -- another one starring Tom Hardy as Max has been filming for awhile now in Australia).

In the first Mad Max movie, released in 1979, Mad Max Rockatansky (Mel Gibson) was a cop who went through Hell and lost his wife and child to some monstrous people. In Mad Max 2: The Road Warrior, something really terrible has happened to civilization since that first movie and now Max lives in a total dog eat dog world. I'm not sure how things turned so nightmarish between the first movie and the second movie, but to me, everything looks a million times worse than it did in Mad Max. We're talking major tribal situations here, where people are fighting for their turf and killing everybody left and right, not giving a damn about how cruel and merciless they can be. It's KILL OR BE KILLED. All set against the desert landscapes of Australia.



Having lost his wife and kid, Mad Max now wanders the streets alone in his very tricked out car. Well, no, actually he's not alone -- he has a dog. Named "Dog." Together, Mad Max and Dog go searching for gasoline so that they can just keep driving. And driving. And driving. And driving. And driving (it's Rodent with wheels).

Oh, and they also share canned dog food together.

Mad Max meets an anorexic man who is smart and has built his own helicopter device. He turns the anorexic man into his slave partner. Then, Max witnesses a woman get raped and murdered, her husband tossed to the side, barely alive. Max brings the man back to his village after making a deal with the man to get some more gasoline. From here, Max integrates with the people of this village, who are at war against a deadly S&M tribe led by a muscle bound man wearing a Jason Voorhees hockey mask -- Humongous.



Humongous has lots of henchmen, but his main guy seems to be Wez, who wears assless leather chaps and feathers while sporting a red mohawk and, early in the movie, has himself a gay lover who appears to be his blonde, womanly bitch.

Humongous and his leather clad S&M posse want what everybody in this world wants -- gasoline. And, well, anything else you might have.

Mad Max, or simply just Max, is at first held captive by the tribe he was trying to help out, but eventually these dumbasses realize that they can't exactly defeat S&M tribes without his help (especially when too many of them seemed very submissive and hippie-like) so he gets to work on helping them secure a tanker so that they may escape the Hell they're in and drive 2,000 miles away where they believe a beautiful beach is waiting for them and they can all BREED, as someone put it, until they die.

What follows is a difficult, savage fight between Max and the two tribes -- but mostly between Max and the S&M tribe, as the hippie tribe barely does anything of merit and many of them wind up dead. The most brutal and strongest member of the tribe that Max is helping out is actually a little boy -- a nameless character known only as "The Feral Kid." Boy is FIERCE with a metal boomerang. He uses it to kill Wez's blonde gay bitch. Also slices off some *******'s fingers. The Feral Kid also happens to be a narrator for the movie at the beginning and end.



The Road Warrior is an epic masterpiece without being some long, drawn out, boring and exhausting epic masterpiece. Short and to the point. Knows what needs to be done, does it, then gets the Hell out of there. Definitely gets better with more viewings, as I said I didn't particularly care for it the first time, but I LOVED it tonight. This is a very intense film -- without being intense in a bloody, gory, graphic way (although there is blood and a little gore). The film is seriously savage. Nihilistic -- but redeeming. Totally captivating and not really boring. A classic. A must see.

Definitely consider it for your '80s MoFo Movies List.

It's just that good.

Dallas Buyers Club
(directed by Jean-Marc Vallée, 2013)



I went to the Angelika Mosiac Film Center & Cafe last night to see Dallas Buyers Club. Oh me, oh my. Pretentious film snob heaven. Or hell, if you're so much a film snob that not even the Angelika Mosiac can impress you. Me and a friend went into the theater room to look at the seats before we adjorned to the bathroom, and as we exited (while following a Fruit Stripe carpet trail right out of a bad Alice in Wonderland remake - or maybe The Wizard of Oz) we passed by a hissy older gay man entering the theater who hissed at us, "Oh? Leaving already, are we? Already disgusted?" It was like Movie Forums: The Theater and I had found wintertriangles.



They had beautiful computerized movie posters on poster sized computer screens outside each theater room/screening room, whatever you call 'em. The screens counted down how long it was until the movie started -- "26 minutes until the next showing of Dallas Buyers Club" -- that kind of thing. AND YOU EVEN GOT TO PICK YOUR OWN SEATS. When you buy your tickets, they make you use a touch screen computer to select which seat will be yours -- so you pre-order and arrange your own seating! I'm not sure how well this gets enforced, though. I imagine the hissy older gay man I encountered has probably been in many fights over his stolen seat, or he's been the seat stealer. "You stole my seat!" This kind of thing can lead to blood on the movie screen. Or hot popcorn being thrown into your face.

Oh, and did I mention that the drinking fountains offered various flavors of Mello Yello? I had GRAPE Mello Yello. A big one. With a decent amount of ice. It was so beautiful - that big cup of icey grape Mello Yello. I will return again for another big cup.



Now, let's get serious -- the movie. Dallas Buyers Club.

My biggest complaint about Dallas Buyers Club is that I did not enjoy the way it was filmed at times. It felt... choppy and thinly sliced.

Let me give you an example: There was a beautifully photographed moment in Dallas Buyers Club -- perhaps the most beautiful imagery in the movie (besides, I'm sorry to say, skinny ass, AIDS ridden Matthew McConaughey's hairy bare behind in a hospital gown as he strolled through a hospital in one scene -- you know they put that imagery in there for us gays). Anyway, there was a beautifully photographed scene where Matthew McConaughey went into a "butterfly room" -- where all these butterflies are flying around and eventually they all fly onto your body. Or most of them, do, at least -- some butterflies might have been frightened by HIV+ Matthew McConaughey and decided to keep to themselves. Anyway, a beautiful moment -- and it ends TOO SOON. It ended abruptly. If that was supposed to be intended to end too quickly (like, maybe as a metaphorical thing -- "AIDS ends life too quickly, thus the beautiful butterfly scene ends too quickly!") I did not appreciate it. Why couldn't we have had a moment longer just to absorb Matthew McConaughey, standing there with his AIDS ridden body, in a beautiful room full of butterflies? I was having a moment and it was ruined. However, I'm sure a still picture of Matthew McConaughey in that butterfly room exists somewhere and it looks amazing, but in the movie? The butterfly room in the movie is a disappointing quickie. And that's my greatest trouble with Dallas Buyers Club -- it feels too much like a quickie.


Here's Matthew McConaughey's Ron Woodroof character with a Japanese man -- so you fans of Asian movies can rest well knowing your people were represented in Dallas Buyers Club.

Now for the good: I really did love Dallas Buyers Club. I don't think it was perfect but it was a spirit enriching story. It is about a dirty old nasty redneck cowboy who's basically trash (Matthew McConaughey) who learns that he has HIV in the 1980's, is told that he has only 30 days to live, is given the drug AZT to help his disease (but it doesn't work -- it kills you) but then he decides -- "F this. I ain't dying. I'm living." And there's a road to living longer -- he's gotta go to countries where different AIDS drugs are available. Drugs that are illegal to sell in the United States. They're not FDA approved. The drugs that are -- such as AZT -- are being given out in trials in the United States -- for study and for scientific research, they say. But those drugs kill you and the drugs available in other countries helped Matthew McConaughey's character, Ron Woodroof, live for seven more years instead of just 30 days, as his American doctors predicted.

Seven more years is a lot longer than thirty days.

Along the way, Ron meets Rayon (Jared Leto) a pre-op transsexual (meaning he hasn't had it cut off) who becomes his business partner. THIS was the hook that grabbed me and threw me into Dallas Buyers Club in the first place. I love Jared Leto and his amazing transformations. He became the fat, heavy killer of John Lennon in Chapter 27 and now he is a feminine, AIDS ridden twig in a dress with sunglasses and a wig and massage friendly womanly hands. A deity of cinematic razzle dazzle rock and roll transsexual power. Unfortunately, Rayon doesn't really do much in Dallas Buyers Club, but what he does do is memorable. He even appears to be a motherly figure (and perhaps maybe a lover) to another character with AIDS (not Matthew) whom he shares medicine with.

Anyway, so Ron figures out how to sell these drugs that have been saving his life to other gay people (and some straight people -- because you don't have to be gay to have AIDS) by selling MEMBERSHIPS to a club -- the Dallas Buyers Club. Buy a membership to the Dallas Buyers Club -- get the drugs free as part of the membership. Essentially, he's selling the drugs, but under the guise of a membership. He does this from a motel room and he's got lines of people forming around the block and all the over place, all seeking his "memberships."

There is also a wonderful performance from Jennifer Garner as a tough doctor who sides with Ron and Griffin Dunne (Madonna's leading man in Who's That Girl) as a man in another country who provides drugs for Ron and becomes a friend.



Ultimately, Matthew McConaughey runs the whole show. This is the most loveable character I've ever seen him play. All I heard people ask me since I saw it was, "Does he deserve the Oscar?! Will he be nominated?!"

All I can say is -- HOW THE HELL WOULD I KNOW?!

It's not like I decide these things.

But I would be very happy for Matthew McConaughey if he did get nominated for something and he won. I feel the same way about Jared Leto as Rayon and Jennifer Garner and hell, even Griffin Dunne. I won't leave you out, Sir.

I have never seen the word AIDS used so much in a movie review, but given the subject matter it is not surprising. I had no idea what this movie was about before reading this review. Now I might want to see it. Is this based off a true story or complete fiction?

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Fear and Loathing in MoFo... The Gunslinger 45's Top 50 Favorite Films

In the 10 Ring: Gunslinger45's reviews

Very interesting indeed.

Great reviews Sexy; I've been looking forward to seeing Dallas Buyers Club since I first saw the trailer a couple months back. I love movies based on true stories set around that era. Matthew McConaughey is also becoming one of my favorite actors, which is something I never thought I would say.

I slightly prefer Mad Max to The Road Warrior but they're both great films, and I am expecting part 2 to make the 80's list. This is when Mel Gibson was at his best.

I've always wanted to see Children of a Lesser God but forgot about it. You just reminded me to add it to my to see list.

You're really giving Jaydee a run for his/her money with this one.

I hadn't realized that there were this many "gay" movies. Pretty interesting.

Really? Wow. You've got a lot to learn. Here's 10 good ones.

http://www.bfi.org.uk/news-opinion/n...tish-gay-films

If Kirk saw Candelabra, he would have another stroke. Why can't Michael just make up his mind what to do with his nymphomania?

What's Eating Gilbert Grape
(directed by Lasse Hallstrom, 1993)



Twenty years ago, in December of 1993, Lasse Hallstrom's What's Eating Gilbert Grape was unleashed upon the world. I don't know when exactly I first saw it, but I think it was probably only six or seven years ago, when I believe I rented it through Netflix. I liked it, but having just rewatched it, I like it a lot more now.

The film takes place in a small town called Endora (like Endora on Bewitched) in the state of Iowa. Johnny Depp plays a guy named Gilbert Grape who works in a little grocery store. Miles away, down by the interstate, a huge, Wal-Mart type grocery store called Food Land just opened and it's taking away all the customers, except those loyal to the small town grocery store that's been around for awhile.



Gilbert Grape has a lot of responsibilities. His mother (played by Darlene Cates) weighs over 500 pounds and has not left the house in years since her husband committed suicide by hanging himself in the family's basement. There are other kids -- two girls, one a mature young lady, the other a maturing young lady. And then there is Arnie.



Leonardo DiCaprio is recognizable and yet not recognizable as he completely transforms himself into Arnie Grape, Gilbert's younger brother, who is cursed with some kind of mental retardation. This, in my opinion, will forever be Leonardo DiCaprio's greatest role, even if it gets overshadowed by all the other things he's done. He was nominated for an Academy Award for Best Supporting Actor for this role, but lost, which is a shame. He plays the most loveable and the most fun and possibly even the most original mentally retarded character that I know of in cinema. A solar system of energy, Arnie Grape is a monkey with the mind of the happiest four year old you could meet, who is constantly climbing trees and getting into trouble by also climbing the nearby water tower every chance he gets. His playful obnoxiousness is not unlike my own when I terrorize everybody on Movie Forums with my so-called "attention seeking." And Johnny Depp is responsible for looking out for him at all times.



Occasionally, Mary Steenburgen slutwalks her way into the grocery store to lead Gilbert back to her house for a "delivery", which is more like a deposit, if you know what I mean. Her husband wants to offer a better future for Gilbert in the land of insurance. But then Juliette Lewis and her grandmother drive into town one summer in their RV and Gilbert becomes smitten for her (Juliette Lewis, that is -- grandma got no love from Johnny Depp -- and YOU KNOW she's disappointed by that. Grandma, go cry in your RV.)

There isn't much of a narrative to What's Eating Gilbert Grape. It is simply a playing out of events between the lives of the characters I've just mentioned during this period of time. But it is a joyous, heartfelt, deeply moving movie that is original and splendid. It would make a great play, if it isn't already one. And it blows Benny & Joon, that other 1993 Johnny Depp movie, completely out of the water. Leonardo DiCaprio's performance in What's Eating Gilbert Grape is scene stealing and if Johnny Depp had been a newcomer to movies here, I wonder if he would have even become the actor he is now. He is almost overshadowed, but he holds down his own fort here.

The biggest surprise, I learned, in regards to What's Eating Gilbert Grape, is how Darlene Cates became involved and played Mama Grape. She actually WAS a housebound, obese woman who had spent years inside her own home and never left. She had never acted before and the director of What's Eating Gilbert Grape cast her as Mama Grape after seeing her appear on the TV show SALLY JESSE RAPHAEL!

YES! Mama Grape -- Darlene Cates -- WAS A '90s TALK SHOW CELEBRITY before she starred in What's Eating Gilbert Grape!

She went on Sally Jesse Raphael to talk about her life as a housebound obese woman. What's Eating Gilbert Grape is therefore almost semi-autobiographical for her. She didn't have a family like the Grapes, and she's actually from Texas, but she really did live like Mama Grape prior to doing the movie. Isn't that surreal? This woman spent YEARS locked up in her own home, afraid to leave because everyone would laugh at her in public, and suddenly she's in a movie with Leonardo DiCaprio and Johnny Depp? (As well as John C. Reilly, Mary Steenburgen and Juliette Lewis)

Darlene Cates, your good fortune after such a hard time in your life makes What's Eating Gilbert Grape all the more inspirational.



I am incredibly disappointed that What's Eating Gilbert Grape didn't make the MoFo '90s Movie List, but even I didn't nominate it. I would have if I had rewatched it in time.

Give this movie a watch if you haven't yet. It's absolutely wonderful.

Yep, great film.

One of only a couple DiCaprio performances I like. The other is This Boy's Life.
Funnily enough, both made in the same year.