Help me out, Simpsons fans

Homer goes to buy a gun...

"Sorry, there's a 3 day waiting period."
"3 days? But I'm angry NOW!"
"We need to run a standard background check."
"Ohhh, I'd kill you if I had my gun!"

Another favorite episode:Homer's Phobia
This is the one where Homer thinks Bart is gay("He didn't give you gay did he?Did he?")because Bart hangs around with that store owner*note,the store was called COCKAMANIE'S.

Heh! You are the living end!

There was this line Mr.Burns says to Homer when Smithers goes on vacation and Homer takes his job that I absolutley love and I can only remember a fraction of it now.Mr.Burns wants like three items for breakfast and one of them is a dodo egg.Confloobery,I love Mr.Burns...whats the other two items?AAGGHH!

LOL...i saw this episode the other day, but can't think of what it was...sorry

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"I was walking down the street with my friend and he said, "I hear music", as if there is any other way you can take it in. You're not special, that's how I receive it too. I tried to taste it but it did not work." - Mitch Hedberg

Yes, a great episode.

"Tell me about my stocks."
"Er... they all went up."
"What about my options?"
"Well you can get up or stay in bed."
"I believe I'll get up."

So simple, but so effective. Smithers has a good role too:

"You're not allowed to take photos at this resort sir."

LOL!

This is so gret!I remember the conversation.
Burns:Ah,yes,Simpson.I'll have my lunch now.A single pillow of shredded wheat,some steamed toast,and a dodo egg.
Homer:But I think the dodo is...
Burns:Get going!And answer those phones,install a computer system,And rotate my office so my desk faces the hills.

also this gem from Smithers:"Your new duties will include answering Mr.Burn's phone,preparing his tax return,moistening his eyeballs,..."

oh, man, i haven't checked this thread in ages. you guys are doing simpsons trivia without me! one of my favorites was the episode where skinner and the kids got snowed in at school, and the hamster in the wheel saved them. remember skinner in the burlap dodgeball bag? "ok, now bite through my sack". the look on the hamster's face was priceless.

YVAN EHT NIOJ.

BrodieMan-who's you're favorite charactor on the Simpsons?Mine's Ralph.Need I say more?

I bent my wookie...my all time favorite ralph wiggum line

yes, ralph! i have a sticker that has a picture of ralph with his finger up his nose on my guitar case. ralph is always funny, but i could never pick just one character out of a cast of hundreds. that would be like asking me to pick my favorite child (assuming i had kids, i'm only 19) or something. i would have such a hard time..... hm.. burns and smithers are funny, homer is always good for a laugh... moe because it's funny watching someone be a total jerk sometimes, barney gumble, milhouse... aw, i can barely even narrow it down

HOMER. He makes that show work. He gets all the best lines -- no doubt about it. His stupidity makes that show what it is. Case in point:

"Let us celebrate this new arrangement with the adding of chocolate to milk."

Agreed TWT - Homer's stupidity is the funniest thing about the show. I love it when he has conversations with his brain.

Have any of you played Simpsons Wrestling? Its for the Playstation(1). Very cool game. I suggest you play it if you haven't yet.

i'd love to play it, but unfortunately i don't have a playstation.
and of course homer's conversations with his brain are always funny. one of my favorite simpsons episodes is when homer gets kicked out of moe's bar for pranking him. remember guy incognito?
hello, my name is guy incognito
moe: yeah, nice try homer. get the hell out.
then he got kicked out and homer found him on the street. hilarious. that was also the episode homer found himself desparate for a new hang-out.
(inside the lesbian bar) wait a minute.... there's something strange about this place.... *gasp* this lesbian bar doesn't have a fire exit! enjoy your death trap, ladies!
anonomous lesbian: what's wrong with her?
and then he admitted he may have to quit drinking and his liver cheered. i still laugh thinking of homer getting mad at his own liver. shut up, liver! *punch* oh, that was priceless.

"Go ahead, Bart...make daddy angry."
"(says something)...and yesterday, I was a little attracted to Milhouse."
"ARGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

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"If Milhouse jumped off a bridge, would you?"
"Milhouse is jumping off a bridge? I'm there!"

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"I know what I can do: I'll just make the news up!"
"Dad, at least take off your Pulitzer when you say that."

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"Leonard Nimoy...what are you doing here?"
"Wherever the paranormal or bizarre is found, you shall find me." (quoting roughly)
Hot Dog Stand Guy: "Hey Spock, what do you want on your hot dog?"
"Surprise me."

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(singing) "I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T...I mean, S-M-A-R-T!"

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Marge: "Everyone is afraid of something."
Homer: "Not EVERYONE" (looks sure of himself)
Marge: "SOCK PUPPETS!"
Homer: "AH! WHERE? WHERE?"

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"Stupid TV...be more funny!"

i don't feel like getting into any deep conversations, so time for some trivia:
another homer/brain debate was when he lost the peanut under the couch, but found a bunch of money.
homer: twenty dollars! but i wanted a peanut!
homer's brain: twenty dollars can buy many peanuts.
homer: explain how
homer's brain: money can be exchanged for goods and services
woo hoo!

or remember when lionel hutz had a lawsuit for false advertising against the movie "the neverending story"?

oh, yeah, and another favorite character is cletus the slackjawed yokel.

YVAN EHT NIOJ

BrodieMan-DUDE,you always qoute the same stuff I like!The peanut in the couch was an inside joke between my sister and I for so long,then we got hooked on that one episode when Lisa goes out with Nelson(haw!haw!).Lisa and Nelson are sitting on a hill and they kiss.Then Nelson's friends come up and say,"You kissed a girl?That's so gay!"Then Lisa says,"Leave him alone!He doesn't wanna hang around you crumb-bums any more!"That's so rich.Freakin' crumb-bums,that's such great writing.I call everyone crumb-bums now.

Ah that right there is great writing on so many levels. First off its funny, then it goes on to make fun of so many kids today who say everything is gay. Every single person I know says something is gay if they don't like it. It's sad. So whenever I hear someone say something's gay I always bring that up just to make fun of them.

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sadesdrk-
i laughed at the "that's so gay" line forever you have incredibly good taste in simpsons gags.