Suspect's Reviews

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Thanks for the reviews. I especially liked the one on "Inside Man."
Do not meddle in the affairs of Dragons.....for you are crunchy and good with ketchup.

28 days...6 hours...42 minutes...12 seconds
KING KONG (Peter Jackson)

"Women Will Be The Death Of Ya."

In the 1930's a film crew decides to go to the infamous "Skull Island". Once there they encounter some locals who terrorize them. After the young and beautiful Anne is taken away, the film crew and ship crew go back to the island to retrieve her. Only they do not know that Anne is being a sacrifice for a giant ape, known as KONG.

Peter Jackson, a couple years before Lord of the Rings, you probably never heard of that name. With such brilliant indie films such as Dead Alive and Meet the Feebles under his belt, one can see why no one would really know him. Once Lord of the Rings hit the screen, Jackson became a name that is constantly thrown into the same sentence with Spielberg. He even has an Oscar to his name, with such success following him, he was able to take his favourite love story and give it a new and improved touch.

Kong is a landmark film, no doubt about it. It is beautiful, heart-warming, thrilling, and powerful. Jackson has a remake on his hands that does not soil the original in anyway, instead Jackson's Kong is a different film on it's own. In a year that was full of lackluster and disappointing films...Sith anyone? Kong is able to make it fun to sit and watch a movie again.

While Kong is not as good as Jackson's Lord of the Rings, well, it is better then The Two Towers, it is one of 2004's best movies. Jackson has wanted to make this film for years, so you know that he will deliver a great film. Everything, from it's story, down to the special effects is top notch. There are only a few missteps that stop this film from being a ten.

The faults are the same that many others have, length,characters and suspension of disbelief. Kong is a long film, running in at 3 hours. The first hour is the lengthy boat trip to "Skull Island". Here would be the perfect opportunity to develop some kind of emotional connection between the two characters played by Naomi Watts and Adrien Brody. Instead we get a few awkward moments between the two and nothing more. It's kind of hard to see Jack go after this woman when there was no real connection between the two. The middle part of the movie is when we see Kong and the beautiful cinematography of "Skull Island". Here is where most of the action takes place and it is a feat to see. The final scene is the most memorable, being in New York on the Empire State building is exciting, and horrific at the same time. You know the outcome of the film, everyone does, but you can't help but root for Kong to kick *expletive deleted* and live at the end. Jackson does change a few key things from the original, but doesn't change the story drastically. Just enough to be able to call it his own, and this KONG is indeed Jackson's baby. Lord of the Rings, is definitely the fans.

Jack Black is surprisingly not as bad as one would think he would be in this role. There are hundreds of other actors out there that would have been better, but Black manages to deliver his lines without some kind of yell or laugh. Watts screams left right and centre and his cgi for a good chunk of the film as well. How she manages to live after being in the grip of Kong during any one of the fights is beyond me. She would be as flat as a pancake. Brody isn't too memorable here, he delivers his lines and walks the line, nothing too special that adds to the film. KONG is without a doubt the star of the film. He is gorgeous, heroic, funny, kick a$$ and smelly all at the same time. It's amazing to see the detail of this creature, well deserved of it's Oscar. On "Skull Island" Jackson and his wizards behind the computer are able to create the craziest creatures out of the darkest places in their minds. Creatures the range from dinosaurs to giant man eating slugs.

Two scenes that made me roll my eyes, I would imagine made everyone else roll their eyes as well. Kong on the ice, not dramatic, but not laughable either. It simply doesn't work to well. Not for the emotion, but for the reality factor, the ice most definitely would break. The second, would be when the kid, who as noted by the one shipmate, has never held a gun before, no training. Yet he is able to shoot the bugs off Jack and not harm him at all? With his eyes closed no less.

I did not cry at the end of the film, but it was moving. Seeing the live of KONG leave his eyes did have move me. It was an adventure and now it has come to an end. The relationship between Anne and KONG can be looked at in two different ways, depending on the viewer. If you honestly believe that a woman can love a giant ape, then you see it in this film...or it can be the kind of relationship that a kid has with his dog. He's protected you from enemies, you've slept together, entertained each other and laughed with each other...but then you have to put the boy down. Seeing the planes fly across the scene was like seeing death knocking on your door. Jackson strikes gold with KONG, being able to move people with the relationship of a woman and a giant ape. Too bad for KONG, he didn't know that women will be the death of ya.

"A laugh can be a very powerful thing. Why, sometimes in life, it's the only weapon we have."

Suspect's Reviews

28 days...6 hours...42 minutes...12 seconds
Sin City (Robert Rodriguez)

"Sin City Joins Die Hard and Fight Club As One Of The Ultimate Guy Flicks"

Sin City tells three different stories, one which involves a dead hooker and a big thug. The other is filled with hookers left right and centre, a bad cop and one super cool dude. The Last story centres around a yellow bastard and a young hot stripper. These stories all take place in Basin City from the creative mind that is Frank Miller.

Sin City had a trailer that I could watch over and over and never get bored of it. The film is the exact same way, only it's 10 times more fun. Sin City is based on the graphics novels by Frank Miller of the same name. Other then the fact that one is a book and the other is film, with some more bits of colour here and there, they are basically the exact same thing. Sin City joins Die Hard and Fight Club as one of the ultimate guy flicks and manages to become the best film of 2005.

Robert Rodriguez makes great films, see From Dusk Till Dawn and Desperado, but every now and again he misses a step, Spy Kids 3-D and The Adventures of Sharkboy and Lava Girl. Here he makes his best film yet, mixing in great visuals, incredible music, the perfect cast and one hell of a good time. Everything fits perfectly for Sin City and it never misses a beat. With Rodriguez behind the camera and Miller by his side for more creative input, Sin City not only becomes the best film of 2005, but one that will go down in history.

Each story is unique for it's own merits and makes you want to re watch it over and over again. "The Hard Good-Bye" and "The Big Fat Kill" stand out over "The Yellow Bastard" simply because they contain more action and move along quicker. That is why I can't give Sin City a perfect ten, The final act, which should go out with a bang, goes out on a depressing soft whimper. It does shock the viewer if they are not familiar with the work it is based on.

What makes Sin City stand out from the rest of the films that came out in 2005? Well, aside from it's amazing visuals, it has the perfect cast. Mickey Rourke is back and is back big, with a bang, however you want to put it. Rourke got seriously overlooked by every award show, he became what he was suppose to become, right down to his chin. Del Toro shines in his role as Jackie Boy. Even the smallest bit of make-up that will make the role more believable helps and Del Toro knew this and wanted to make it as perfect as possible, he pulls it off. Clive Owen is super cool, as he is in almost everything he does. He just emulates it, although it does help that DWIGHT is super cool as well. They blend well together. It took me awhile to get passed Bruce Willis because everything I see him in, I don't see the character, I see Bruce Willis. He manages to pull it off, although it may take time to get use to him. The supporting cast help flesh out the film even more. Seeing a familiar face here and there is a treat for the audience.

The films character were great, from the big brooding Marv, to the small agile and creepy Kevin. These comic book characters are brought to life by these actors and only in a world as imaginative as Sin City could these character exist and here they kick ass to the next level. Rodriguez creates his own environment and world for that matter. Much like Jackson did with the Lord of the Rings, and Lucas did with Star Wars. Rodriguez brings paper to screen and has made a world in which we will definitely see more stories evolve from.

The music is beautiful. Rodriguez has an ear for music and uses it to it's full potential here. From the theme music that everyone loves to hear and gets excited about when they hear it, to the opening score. It fits the genre well. The visuals were interesting to see. The entire film was shot on digital, so the crisp look of the black and white is even more crisp then you would think. With dabs of colour here and there, Sin City catches the eye and makes the viewer glued to the screen.

City is not for the faint of heart and is not exactly the first choice for date movie. The film contains some pretty graphic scenes, like decapitations, castrations, electrocution, explosions, stabbings, gun shots wounds, axe wounds, dog eating man wounds,and everything else. The bullet, the babes and the blood comes everywhere in here and if you enjoy this thing, as I do, then this is a film that you will definitely want to check out. Sin City has balls and it's not afraid of what it wants to show it's viewer.


Originally Posted by TheUsualSuspect
The Last story centres around a yellow bastard and a young hot stripper.
Really enjoyed your review and it was nice to revisit Sin City again.

But I have one comment ...about the young hot stripper. Sin City pulls no punches and cuts no corners. The one "copout" is Jessica Alba and her refusal to do nudity. What the hell is she doing in Sin City? A stripper who doesn't strip. She's perfectly willing to tease with her cuter than cute face and her gyrating body but no stripping for Jessica.

Stick to PG13 Jessica and leave the R rated movies to the grownups.

I must have had too much sugar in my cereal this morning.
My name is Maximus Decimus Meridius, commander of the Armies of the North, General of the Felix Legions, loyal servant to the true emperor, Marcus Aurelius. Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife. And I will have my vengeance, in this life or the next.

Sir Sean Connery's love-child
You pair of pervs!!!
( ok, so I was dissapointed too, more of a Rosaria Dawson fan though!!!! )
Hey Pepe, would you say I have a plethora of presents?

Toga, toga, toga......

Was it over when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbour?

Originally Posted by Darth Stujitzu
( ok, so I was dissapointed too, more of a Rosaria Dawson fan though!!!! )
That may be the best reason to see Alexander.

Sir Sean Connery's love-child
Originally Posted by Twain
That may be the best reason to see Alexander.

Surely you mean the only reason!!!!

28 days...6 hours...42 minutes...12 seconds
2001 Maniacs (Tim Sullivan)

"Englund's Over The Top Performance Is Worth The Rental"

Three college students decide to travel to Florida for some fun at Spring Break. After seeing a detour sign, they take the dirt road in hoping to get to their destination a little quicker. Soon they discover a little town called Pleasant Valley. Five more people show up right after them and decide to stay the night for some celebration.

2001 Maniacs sounds promising for the old school B-horror movie fans. A bunch of young college kids, go to this town and the residents decide to kill them and eat them. Crazy isn't it? Well, what should have been and what could have been is missing in 2001 maniacs. Call it a sequel or a remake of the 1964 film Two Thousand Maniacs, 2001 maniacs suffers from trying to be over the top but failing to do so. The deaths are good to watch and with a little bit more blood, then the fun time that is suppose to be had by this film could have been achieved. You're suppose to laugh with this movie and in some cases you do, but in others you are wondering why am I watching this?

What could have, what should have, is exactly what 2001 maniacs is. With a premise such as this film has, you would expect over the top gory funny and unique deaths. You do get these qualities in the deaths, but they are not anything that one would expect. When you are about to see a women lose all their limbs from horses running in opposite directions, you get excited a little bit, if you're into that sort of thing, but in Maniacs it losses it touch.

The goal of this film is to be a throw back to the old cheesy bad horror movies, and it achieves this goal. The dialogue is cheesy, the deaths are gory (although you'd expect more), there's nudity from young hot chicks, and of course the villains are crazy as hell, so crazy that you may even root for them in their evil goals. Some things you may question in the film, such as why would such a young and hot woman, known as Kat, be attracted to a southern hillbilly with awkward teeth, or even why the one character arms wrestles another to see who will give or receive in some homosexual sex. This film definitely pokes fun at the south, having some characters chase after animals with that twinkle of love in their eye.

Maniacs has a good build up but the delivery is kind of weak. The ending horrible and tries to take the film in a whole other direction. If there were a different ending then this film would have been graded a bit higher. I can see a future for Tim Sullivan in the horror genre, if he had some better material.

So how can I give this flick a recommendation, well it lies in the over the top performance from Robert Englund, who is the highlight of Maniacs. His role is so juicy and fun to watch that every time he isn't on screen you feel bored by the flick. I recommend this flick for fans of Englund and fans of the genre. If you're into some cheesy dialogue and violence just for the sake of violence, then 2001 Maniacs is right up your alley.


28 days...6 hours...42 minutes...12 seconds
Chronicles of Narnia:The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe (Andrew Adamson

"With Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter, Narnia Is Adventure-Lite"

Four children walk through a wardrobe and discover a land of mystery and enchantment. After the youngest learns that her friend from the land of Narnia has been kidnapped, she pleads for her brothers and sister to help rescue him. Once meeting the creatures that live in Narnia the siblings soon discover that they are some kind of prophecy written heroes. The Kings and Queens of Narnia that are said to rid the Witch of her evil reign with the help of Aslan, the lion.

Narnia seemed like the perfect film of the year that had adventure, excitement, and fantasy all rolled into one entertaining film. Based on the books, which are loved by millions, Narnia had a huge step to overcome in pleasing it's devoted fans. It's too bad that in a world with Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter, Narnia is adventure-lite. It's scope seems bigger then what it's reality is. Even when judging it against another book turned film, Series of Unfortunate Events, Narnia seems to be lagging behind in last place.

To begin with, the children are not likable at all. The little one who is suppose to be cute is annoying, the younger brother is a pain in the ass, the older sister has too little screen time to make any kind of connection, while the oldest is just too dumb. Not to mention that all the actors playing them were annoying to listen to. Other then the main characters, who we are stuck with no matter what. The supporting cast, the witch, the Faun and the deep and perfect voice of Aslan, Liam Neeson make up, a little bit, for what the children actors lack.

Nothing really exciting happen in the film. When you have a fantasy film such as this, that promises an adventure, you would expect something a little bit more then what the result is. It takes thirty some odd minutes for all the children to finally get into Narnia, after that they encounter a beaver and learn what the place is and who they supposedly are. After a quick run in with some wolves, and the younger brother in the hands of the witch, nothing else happens, save for the final battle. The kids are safe in their "terrirtory" where the heroes of the film get ready for the final battle. Then the final battle occurs, which is something right out of a card game Magic: The Gathering.

There's not too much of an emotional attachment to any of the characters, so when one is near death, we can't seem to care. This installment is a weak first entry to something that could be a successful series. Narnia does contain beautiful images, ranging from snowy mountain tops, to green valleys. It's a beautiful film, with great special effects, costume designs and set pieces. They have created a wonderful world where these creatures live in. Go into Narnia expecting a wild adventurous time, then you will be disappointed. Hoping to expect to see a massive battle scene, skip it, it can't hold a candle to anything that Jackson served us. See this, for beautiful images or if you're a fan of the material, whether you will be satisfied or not is up for debate, as I've never read the books.


Originally Posted by TheUsualSuspect
To begin with, the children are not likable at all. The little one who is suppose to be cute is annoying, the younger brother is a pain in the ass, the older sister has too little screen time to make any kind of connection, while the oldest is just too dumb. Not to mention that all the actors playing them were annoying to listen to.

You're right about the children. There are some great child actors, and maybe these are good too, but I never felt much of a connection with them. If this one element of the film had been better (along the lines of the children in ET), it would have been a much better experience.

Also, as I mentioned in my review of Narnia, the brave battle scene is given entirely to the boys. I wanted to see the older girl do some damage with that bow she hauled around for an hour, but not here. I think that showed the age of the material. In today's world, the girl would have been at the center of the battle.

28 days...6 hours...42 minutes...12 seconds
Thank You For Smoking (Jason Reitman)

"Nick Naylor Make Me Want To Smoke"

Nick Naylor, a lobbyist on behalf of Tobacco industries, is a smart, good-looking, fast talking S.O.B. Naylor travels to different locations for these Tobacco industries as their spokesman, on this trip he takes his son and tries to be a role model while keeping his image good in the public eye.

Is there any kind of plot behind Thank you For Smoking, on the surface not really. Smoking is a film that is more character driven. It's in the comedic style of a David O. Russell film or maybe even a Wes Anderson film. Smoking is a quirky, in your face, dark, odd comedy that actually works. Too often we see films that are too dark and not comedic enough with it's material, Duplex and Ice Harvest to name some. Here, Reitman takes a controversial topic and puts a comedic spin on it. The film doesn't take one side or the other, but in the end tells you to make your mind up for yourself.

It may take a pretty sick and twisted individual to laugh at some scenes, such as "Cancer Boy" or the topics that the "M.O.D" have at their dinner table. Ladies and Gentlmen, I am a sick and twisted individual and I enjoyed this film. It made light of a heavy topic and actually make you like the lead character who is the one killing people...more or less. How can we like such a character? Well, it does help when the character is an intelligent, smooth talking, good looking guy, who gets to bang Katie Holmes. The other reason is that the character is played extremely well by Aaron Eckhart. Hands down his best role to date and hopefully one where he will be able to get more recognition. Bottom Linbe, Nick Naylor make me want to smoke, because he is so convincing at what he does, as it's the only thing he's good at.

Smoking speaks the truth, in a sick and twisted funny way. The main character gets kidnapped and gets a couple dozen smoking patches slapped onto his body, then left to rot in the Lincoln memorial lap. We then find out that it was smoking that saved his life, Naylor's response? "Can I quote you on that?" This is what the whole movie is like, smart a witty dialogue with cool and funny characters. Some of the best scenes are between Eckhart and Lowe, who play very well off each other in a scene where they try to promote smoking in the films. The need a role model to show that smoking is cool, someone like Indiana Jones meets Jerry Maguire, on two packs a day.

The only downfall of the film is Naylor's son, who is a kid that you may end up hating, just because of the kid being the way he is. It's the same kid from Birth and Godsend. There is just something about his acting that annoys me, it could be his emotionless face...but then again, I'm not a big fan of many child actors. The supporting cast includes Maria Bello, J.K. Simmons, William H. Macy, Robert Duvall, Rob Lowe, Sam Elliot and Katie Holmes. All Holmes does in the movie is have sex with Naylor, then write an article...not much more, so if you're a lover or hater of the one half of TOMKAT, she has no impact on the film, her screen time maxes out at about ten minutes.

Thank You For Smoking is a film that is definitely not for everyone, it's not laugh out loud funny, it's comedic style is a little bit more intelligent. Using it's comedy in it's dialogue and it's subject matter. The film doesn't say Smoking is good for you, or that it's bad, it expects you to know the answer already. Thank You For Smoking is an early contender for a top ten list and is an underdog in every sense of the word. It won't get much recognition from the public, or probably even the critics, but as it stands this film is...smokin'.


28 days...6 hours...42 minutes...12 seconds
The Aristocrats (Paul Provenza)

"The Joke Is Only Funny Depending On The Comic"

This is a documentary that showcases various comedians telling the most disgusting joke that they can think of. The joke has a beginning and and punchline, but the middle section is up in the air for as much creativity as the comic can muster. A family walks into a talent agent's office....

That's how the joke starts, and when you hear it at the end, you have two reactions. Laugh uncontrollably, or sit there with a blank stare. The joke itself is not funny, but depending on the comic telling it, you can be rolling on the floor with laughter. This film is not for the weak stomach, it has the most foul things that people can imagine, blood, sex, incest, death, various body parts, various juices, various weapons, urine, vomit, and a dog. If you can sit through some sick and twisted humour, The Aristrocrats is a film for you.

The funniest scene in the entire movie belongs to those rude and crude animated characters on South Park, who manage to poke fun at the 9/11 victims. That joke is the lowest, but funniest part in the film. Kudos to Stone and Parker for getting the biggest laugh. Other highlights include, Bob Saget, who with his wholesome image manages to spew some disgusting bits of filth. Gilbert Gottfried tells the joke in public on stage, and is considered to have the biggest set of balls for doing so. Others that I fond enjoyable were Drew Carrey & Robbin Williams, who told the joke a little different from the others, as well as George Carlin, with his gargling bit.

Unfortunately with these comedians who tell is so well, there are others, who stumble, and are just not funny. Case in point, Whoopie Goldberg, she tries to act like she doesn't want to tell the joke, then tries to shock us with some kind of penis joke and finally fails to get any laughs. For every good joke told, there is a bad one, which really makes you sit there and think to yourself, why put these people in if they're not funny?

The joke itself, although is different every time, does get tiresome. You do hear the same things over and over, mom and son, dad and daughter, blood here, semen there, the only difference is that the comedian puts it in a different situation, or order. It was neat to see that the joke has been around for years and that every single comedian knows it and has been saying it to each other as an inside joke type thing. Know that the joke itself has hit the general public, I have the feeling that it will lose all it's vulgarity.

The bottom line is, this film will make you laugh, sit there bored and maybe even have you cringe your face in disgust. There are hundreds of comedians in the film, so that is something else that you may be able to enjoy. As well as the ending, which tells you to go out and keep the joke, do you have the next Aristocrats joke?


Originally Posted by TheUsualSuspect
The Aristocrats (Paul Provenza)

The bottom line is, this film will make you laugh,
Thats what i am looking for, a good
Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship.

28 days...6 hours...42 minutes...12 seconds
Silent Hill (Christophe Gans)

"I Had A Skin Ripping, Blood Dripping, Body Tearing Good Time"

Rose takes her daughter to Silent Hill in hopes of finding an answer to her sleep walking nightmares. After a car accident just outside the town, Rose wakes up to see her daughter missing. Now she must roam through the ash dreaded streets of Silent Hill....

Silent Hill is based on a video game, one of which I've played, briefly. So I know what I'm in store for, but still didn't expect it. Silent Hill is one of the better horror films of the decade and without a doubt one of the better, if not the best video game adaptation...ever. That's not saying this movie is perfect, it does have it's faults, but the bottom line is that I had a skin ripping, blood dripping, body tearing good time.

Silent Hill is beautiful to look at. The cinematography is wonderful, ranging from gray ash ridden streets and buildings, to blood dripping red terrifying nightmares. The film jumps back and fourth between the two eerie scenery and manages to make you feel the eerie weirdness and confusion that our main character, Rose goes through. Rose's husband, Sean Bean, goes through the same town, but in a different state...he's world is grounded and realistic.

Is Silent Hill terrifying? Yes and no. It depends on what you've been exposed to in previous films. For me, I love the horror genre, so I've seen it all. Silent Hill wasn't anything to shake me to my bones, but it does a very good job and being creepy. One of the best parts of the movie is the siren. It blares a warning sound when the town turns into the nightmare. You hear it for the first time and you know that nothing good can come of it. You hear it a second time and you are terrified, knowing what will come, but not knowing what to really expect. The third time, you just say to yourself that the characters better get the hell out of there. There are three worlds in Silent Hill. The "real" world, in which Sean Bean is looking for his wife and daughter. The "Limbo" world, which is when the town is covered is ashes creating the foggy creepy feeling, then finally, with the siren alarm comes the nightmare world, where we meet all the insane, brutal, pyramid head nightmares.

The Pyramid Head guy, if you've played the games you know who I'm talking about, if not...he a guy with a giant pyramid on his think it's funny? Wait till you meet the guy, you might sh*t your pants. He carries a big sword, and can rip the skin of a human in one second flat. The little time he is on the screen, you hide behind those fingers of yours, peeking every once in a while to see if the nightmare is over.

There is one scene that is a pure "Evil Dead" moment. In the original "Evil Dead" one of the characters gets raped by a tree, here it does that same scene, only upping the terror and cringe worthiness. Think...barbwire. Is there gore? Well, let see, there is the one scene that I just described, in which the body is then ripped in half. Pyramid remember him, well he rips the skin off a human body. A woman is beaten to near death with blunt instruments, then burned alive. The burning of the woman is kind of pointless. She is repeatedly beaten, to the point where we think she is dead. But, oh no, she is still alive. Can she be saved in time? We think so, otherwise why is she still alive, but then she is burned alive. Reason, for shock value. Pointless.

What hurts this film is the useless character of the father, it's need to explain everything and the corny dialogue. While we're in Silent Hill, we should always be in Silent Hill. You take away from the suspense when we have to follow the father and his searching for the two. It takes away from the mystery of what's going on. The audience should be lost with it's main character, there should be no connection to the outside world when you're in Silent Hill. That would ultimately make it more terrifying. Which leads me into it's second fault, which seems to be a trend in many movies. The need to explain why. Why do we always have to have an explanation of why bad things have happened. Why can't it all be a mystery, they're there for our imagination to come up with a reason, not because of what you're telling us. Granted the way they told us was different and nice to see, it's still hurting the film in the end.

The dialogue is laughable, is it because it's based on a video game? No, video games can have good dialogue, this film has teen slasher dialogue written all over it. Scream names here in hope to find an individual. Lines like, "Hey, look at this" or "No, you're the sinner". Stuff that should be in a cheesy B-horror movie film that came from the 80's. In this movie it is just out of place. Everything is great in the film, except for the dialogue.

The ending does many things, leave you to come up with an explanation and lean into a possible sequel. What I took from the ending?
WARNING: "Silent Hill" spoilers below
Rose is still in the "Limbo" world. Her daughter has been for a lack of a better word, possessed by the demon. Which is why she has a different look at the end, the look that a kid such a Damien would give us. The way it's presented to us can confuse the audience, but I liked it.
Silent Hill, for the hardcore fans, I think will please. For horror fans, will please. Silent Hill is a genuine terrifying experience.


Sir Sean Connery's love-child
I enjoyed parts of Silent Hill, I've only played the game a few times, so most of the story was new to me.
I thought the first half of the film was the better, Rose's first entry into Silent Hill was very spooky and built tension and fear in equal amounts.
Personally I thought the film was a tad long, the dialogue was awful, Sean Bean was a waste of space, but my main gripe was the limited screentime of Pyramid head, I felt almost as cheated as the brief cameo of Darth Maul in the craptacular Phantom Menace, why don't they give more time to characters that are truely frightening and iconic?
Not a bad film, I wonder if it will be as good after subsequent viewings, Brotherhood of the Wolf was great the first time I saw it, but has never again given me that feeling on subsequent viewings, defenitely a director to look out for though.

28 days...6 hours...42 minutes...12 seconds
Twelve Monkeys (Terry Gilliam)

"One Of The Best Time Travel Movies To Grace The Screen"

James Cole is sent back in time to stop a virus that destroys humanity. He must look for clues to lead him to the group known as the 12 monkeys, but is sent too far back in time and ends up as an insane patient in a hospital. Know he must escape the hospital and continue his mission.

With a brilliant script, a unique vision and a superb cast, 12 monkeys makes it mark in cinema history as one of the best time travel movies to grace the screen. 12 Monkeys is a film that will take multiple viewings to comprehend, and even then there is still new aspects of the film that appear to you with every viewing. Everything in this film clicks together so well, making it one of the best films of the 90's.

Terry Gilliam is a director that looks at the world at an angle, he brings this angle to his films. One only has to view his previous films, such as Brazil to see how far off the edge this guy is. With 12 Monkeys he brings us a film that is off the chart is bizarre weirdness, but is able to make the film make sense in the end. Which is hard for any time travel flick. Unlike other films that deal with time travel, 12 monkeys makes the entire act of time travel seem believable. Gilliam has an impressive track record and 12 monkeys is near the top of it.

Brad Pitt stands out in this film as the totally insane patient that befriends Willis. What did Gilliam do to make Pitt so nuts in this film? Simply take away his cigarettes. Maybe Pitt should stop smoking all together and his other films will be as good as this one. Pitt gives this dark and morose film a funny bone. Willis, who normally is mediocre in his films shines here. Along with Stowe, this cast brings a whole new level to the film.

The film itself is off the wall and ahead of it's time. It's dark and brilliant. The only fault would be that in some scenes it drags a bit. 12 Monkeys is a film that will still be talked about in years to come. It is definitely one of the best films for everyone involved. It's madness starts from the first shot right up until the last second, it never lets it's out of place style end. Which is what makes this film so good.


28 days...6 hours...42 minutes...12 seconds
Army of Darkness (Sam Raimi)

"Now Listen Up,You Primitive Screwheads...You Must Watch This Movie!!!"

In the third installment of the Evil Dead Trilogy, our hero Ash is sent back in time to 1300 A.D. where he is enslaved and sent to the pit. After defeating the evil deadite that lingers in the depths of the pit, he is hailed as the chosen one. Ash, wants nothing to do with them and only wants to get back home, but the only way to do his is to retrieve the book of the dead. Unfortunately for Ash, he awakens the dead while taking the book, and now must battle the army of Darkness before he goes back to his own time.

Back in the year 1981, Sam Raimi and a group of friends created one of the most terrifying horror movies to date, The Evil Dead. Again in 1987 Raimi and Co. managed to create yet another genuine horror experience with Evil Dead II. Now with the third installment in this series, Raimi gives us a comedic cult classic film that will have you quoting every piece of dialogue in your every day life.

Army of Darkness is a perfect example of a cult classic. If you go walking down a street and ask if anyone has heard of it, they'll give you the crazy look. But search the net or go to any horror convention and you'll see that there are Evil Dead maniacs out there, and I am proud to say that I am one of them.

Most trilogies tend to suck by the third film, Blade trinity and revolutions to name a few, but here Darkness manages to make itself a stand alone film and a fine damn one at that. It still has it's nods to the original Evil Dead, but if you're looking for the ultimate horror experience, then this film is not for you. Instead Darkness is full of comedic dialogue and actions. Our hero ASH spits out classic one-liners that so many people try to copy today...I'm looking your way Duke Nukem.

Bruce Campbell is ASH. His character evolves throughout the trilogy and it's in this third installment that he is a badass. It's in this third installment that everyone remembers him from. It's in this third installment where he has the chainsaw, the boomstick, the one-liners, the sugar. Campbell will always be known for this one character. He's such a coward and yet we still feel the need to cheer him on. Campbell is the master of physical comedy and he uses it to his advantage here, fighting an army of mini ashs, splitting away from his evil self and getting his face sucked down an unknown demon hole from a book.

Speaking of which, that's what makes the film even more enjoyable. It's insane bizarre comedic tone. Whether you like slapstick comedy or have a dark funny bone, this film is delightful for all. I never thought I would laugh so much at someone pouring boiling hot water down their throat. Then to have the thing grow inside of you and try to detach itself from your body, only in a movie like this can you watch that and laugh with it. Granted, it would help if you've seen the first two films and in order as well. The opening does give you a recap of what's happened, but you feel more for the film and ASH if you've been through the horrors that he has.

Much like Peter Jackson got his start in the horror movie genre, so did Sam Raimi. You know, the guy that went on to direct such big hits as Spiderman and Spiderman 2. Army of Darkness has the little Sam Raimi touch with it. Once you see it you can tell that it's Raimi behind the lens. Raimi has his brothers scattered throughout the film, playing many different characters at that. As well as Three Stoogies get ups and the POV of certain objects, such as arrows being shot or forks being thrown.

The effects are great and still low key. You can tell which deadites are guys in suits and the black fabric behind the eyes of other skeletons, but that's what gives this film it's cheesy B movie goodness. Seeing ASH fight against all the evil mini ashs is a feat for the eyes as well, even if it does look so fake.

This is a great way to end the trilogy. I hope they do not make a fourth installment, as this is one of the greatest trilogies of all time, I'd even put it in the same sentence with Star Wars or Lord of the Rings, watch the Helm's Deep scene and tell me Jackson did not use army of Darkness as inspiration. I do not own all the DVD versions out there, which are a handful, but I do have the boomstick edition, so I'm able to enjoy the theatrical cut and the director's cut. Army of Darkness is a film that I can watch over and over and never get tired of, which is what a great fun movie should be.