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The Jacket
Psychological Drama / English / 2005
WHY'D I WATCH IT?
ChatGPT suggestion, let's go.
WHAT'D I THINK? *SPOILERS*
I'm labeling this review a "Psychological Drama" because despite having a lot of loud scary noises for no reason, it's not much of a thriller.
In fact, just to get my biggest issue out of the way, the audio leveling in this movie is ****ing dogshit.
The premise is that a war veteran is discharged with a head wound and consequently can't remember the events of an incident in which he gets picked up as a hitchhiker and the driver kills a cop. The driver frames him for the murder and he's later committed to an insane asylum, which is just ****ing stupid and nonsensical on it's face. Is "I can't remember, I have a traumatic brain injury" grounds to commit him for "insanity"? ****in' clownshoes.
In the asylum, it's the traditional trope of all of the hospital staff being irredeemably evil, vindictive, and sadistic people, and one of them regularly subjects Main Guy to an illegal experiment wherein he's forced into a straight jacket, drugged with an unknown substance, and trapped in a morgue cabinet for hours on end.
That'd be a bad enough experience, but Main Guy discovers that he can, and say it with me now, time travel to 2007 where he learns of his eventual death.
These drug trips are accompanied by an extremely loud and aggressive battery of pads and crackling white noise, so much so that I had to turn my volume down. However this movie also features some very very quiet whispering so that I repeatedly had to pause, back up, and replay the movie with subtitles. It was very annoying.
The movie also focuses on a plot revolving around meeting a girl he came across in her youth, but in 2007 she's all grown up and has adopted some of her mother's bad habits.
The first time they meet, despite apparently trying to keep Main Guy at arm's reach, Main Girl casually just invites him into her apartment, let's her explore the fridge, and even takes a bath while he's there, even acknowledging that he could steal something if he wanted.
That's a lot more trust than I would give to some total spook standing outside my workplace.
When he eventually realizes she's the girl he once gave his old dog tags to, he tells her and she reacts in such a goofily "drunk" performance. Not just irrationally angry anything, but Keira Knightley just screws up her face and looks like she trying to play some sort of comedy psycho instead of an ordinary drunk woman.
The second time they meet I facepalm so hard because it's the literal definition of an Overnight Romance, one of my all-time most hated movie tropes. Main Guy is in the cabinet for "3 hours" the first time and "overnight" the second time, so literally not even a full day has elapsed before Main Guy & Girl are snogging and having sex and she's saying she can't live without him now.
It's not like they didn't try to create some chemistry, but I just flatout do not accept this relationship in so short a time. Would it have KILLED the writers to write in some passage of time sequence so that maybe these "jacket sessions" communicate that they've had longer to know each other than half a day?
I don't know why that's so ****ing difficulty for these Hollywood writers, have they never been in a relationship? Is there just a caste of horny virgins that the industry has on standby any time they want a plot for a movie so that every single movie that doesn't need romance or a sex scene in it has romance and a sex scene and it's always so ****ing sudden?
The first kiss jumpscare is real. That shit hit me in this movie and I immediately went, "NOOOO!!! WHHHYYYYY AAAAUUUGGGGHHHH!!!!"
It felt like there were at least 3 different scenes where Main Guy is clearly demonstrating that he has access to information he shouldn't have and he's just flatly dismissed with the same line, "these ideas are part of your delusions", "these ideas are part of your delusions", "these ideas are part of your delusions", like jesus ****ing christ, you stupid ****s are a disgrace to science.
Some random kid gets shocked out of a catatonic state with electro-convulsive therapy, one time. Didn't realize you could just cure that with a zap to the brain, guess we've had it wrong all along, thank you doctor for performing this procedure in secret and illegally upon my child.
Also when Main Guy cracks his head on the ice at the end of the movie, they just shove his ass back in the morgue to die. They drug him, put a straightjacket on him, and leave him to bleed out.
Granted, he asked for it, but HOLY SHIT does the neverending failure of these doctors know no bounds? Not a single shot of any effort whatsoever to perform first aid on this man, nothing to even stop the bleeding.
You know it might have been a bad enough scandal that he was fatally injured on the ice because a doctor smuggled him off of hospital property, but you know what's probably worse than that? Following up that same career-ending ****up by doing absolutely nothing to save his life and immediately subjecting him to the chemical abuse and sensory deprivation you were already torturing him with, so that he could 100% die in your custody AND it looks like you ****ing murdered him AND hid the body, yeah that looks great.
This ****ing bitch keeps her job after this, and Main Guy is indefinitely committed because he was ****ing shot twice.
Go **** yourself.
I know I've had a lot of negativity to say in this one, but I will commend Daniel Craig's performance as one of the asylum patients, he's a much more entertaining character than Brad Pitt was in Twelve Monkeys, and he's honestly the highlight performance of this movie.
I could 100% see myself having this would-be killer talk my ear off about the Organization for Organizing.
Final Verdict: [Weak]
The Jacket
Psychological Drama / English / 2005
WHY'D I WATCH IT?
ChatGPT suggestion, let's go.
WHAT'D I THINK? *SPOILERS*
I'm labeling this review a "Psychological Drama" because despite having a lot of loud scary noises for no reason, it's not much of a thriller.
In fact, just to get my biggest issue out of the way, the audio leveling in this movie is ****ing dogshit.
The premise is that a war veteran is discharged with a head wound and consequently can't remember the events of an incident in which he gets picked up as a hitchhiker and the driver kills a cop. The driver frames him for the murder and he's later committed to an insane asylum, which is just ****ing stupid and nonsensical on it's face. Is "I can't remember, I have a traumatic brain injury" grounds to commit him for "insanity"? ****in' clownshoes.
In the asylum, it's the traditional trope of all of the hospital staff being irredeemably evil, vindictive, and sadistic people, and one of them regularly subjects Main Guy to an illegal experiment wherein he's forced into a straight jacket, drugged with an unknown substance, and trapped in a morgue cabinet for hours on end.
That'd be a bad enough experience, but Main Guy discovers that he can, and say it with me now, time travel to 2007 where he learns of his eventual death.
These drug trips are accompanied by an extremely loud and aggressive battery of pads and crackling white noise, so much so that I had to turn my volume down. However this movie also features some very very quiet whispering so that I repeatedly had to pause, back up, and replay the movie with subtitles. It was very annoying.
The movie also focuses on a plot revolving around meeting a girl he came across in her youth, but in 2007 she's all grown up and has adopted some of her mother's bad habits.
The first time they meet, despite apparently trying to keep Main Guy at arm's reach, Main Girl casually just invites him into her apartment, let's her explore the fridge, and even takes a bath while he's there, even acknowledging that he could steal something if he wanted.
That's a lot more trust than I would give to some total spook standing outside my workplace.
When he eventually realizes she's the girl he once gave his old dog tags to, he tells her and she reacts in such a goofily "drunk" performance. Not just irrationally angry anything, but Keira Knightley just screws up her face and looks like she trying to play some sort of comedy psycho instead of an ordinary drunk woman.
The second time they meet I facepalm so hard because it's the literal definition of an Overnight Romance, one of my all-time most hated movie tropes. Main Guy is in the cabinet for "3 hours" the first time and "overnight" the second time, so literally not even a full day has elapsed before Main Guy & Girl are snogging and having sex and she's saying she can't live without him now.
It's not like they didn't try to create some chemistry, but I just flatout do not accept this relationship in so short a time. Would it have KILLED the writers to write in some passage of time sequence so that maybe these "jacket sessions" communicate that they've had longer to know each other than half a day?
I don't know why that's so ****ing difficulty for these Hollywood writers, have they never been in a relationship? Is there just a caste of horny virgins that the industry has on standby any time they want a plot for a movie so that every single movie that doesn't need romance or a sex scene in it has romance and a sex scene and it's always so ****ing sudden?
The first kiss jumpscare is real. That shit hit me in this movie and I immediately went, "NOOOO!!! WHHHYYYYY AAAAUUUGGGGHHHH!!!!"
It felt like there were at least 3 different scenes where Main Guy is clearly demonstrating that he has access to information he shouldn't have and he's just flatly dismissed with the same line, "these ideas are part of your delusions", "these ideas are part of your delusions", "these ideas are part of your delusions", like jesus ****ing christ, you stupid ****s are a disgrace to science.
Some random kid gets shocked out of a catatonic state with electro-convulsive therapy, one time. Didn't realize you could just cure that with a zap to the brain, guess we've had it wrong all along, thank you doctor for performing this procedure in secret and illegally upon my child.
Also when Main Guy cracks his head on the ice at the end of the movie, they just shove his ass back in the morgue to die. They drug him, put a straightjacket on him, and leave him to bleed out.
Granted, he asked for it, but HOLY SHIT does the neverending failure of these doctors know no bounds? Not a single shot of any effort whatsoever to perform first aid on this man, nothing to even stop the bleeding.
You know it might have been a bad enough scandal that he was fatally injured on the ice because a doctor smuggled him off of hospital property, but you know what's probably worse than that? Following up that same career-ending ****up by doing absolutely nothing to save his life and immediately subjecting him to the chemical abuse and sensory deprivation you were already torturing him with, so that he could 100% die in your custody AND it looks like you ****ing murdered him AND hid the body, yeah that looks great.
This ****ing bitch keeps her job after this, and Main Guy is indefinitely committed because he was ****ing shot twice.
Go **** yourself.
I know I've had a lot of negativity to say in this one, but I will commend Daniel Craig's performance as one of the asylum patients, he's a much more entertaining character than Brad Pitt was in Twelve Monkeys, and he's honestly the highlight performance of this movie.
I could 100% see myself having this would-be killer talk my ear off about the Organization for Organizing.
Final Verdict: [Weak]