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Dragon Tiger Gate
Martial Arts / Chinese / 2006
WHY'D I WATCH IT?
When I hear people talk about B-Movies, they too often drift into "so bad it's good" territory which is just not a territory I'm familiar with or interested in. I get why you'd laugh at something really bad, but that's not enough to convince me your movie is worth my [reassessment] time.
WHAT'D I THINK? *SPOILERS*
No, when I think of B-Movies, I think of Dragon Tiger Gate, a movie that tries SO HARD to be cooler than it is that it ALMOST gets there.
Take the following screenshot for example:
Dragon Tiger Gate
Martial Arts / Chinese / 2006
WHY'D I WATCH IT?
When I hear people talk about B-Movies, they too often drift into "so bad it's good" territory which is just not a territory I'm familiar with or interested in. I get why you'd laugh at something really bad, but that's not enough to convince me your movie is worth my [reassessment] time.
WHAT'D I THINK? *SPOILERS*
No, when I think of B-Movies, I think of Dragon Tiger Gate, a movie that tries SO HARD to be cooler than it is that it ALMOST gets there.
Take the following screenshot for example:
Pictured Above: A totally awesome fight scene interrupted by poorly timed slow-mo shot.
That's not just a random screencap, that's a pose that the movie slows down and zooms in to capture.
Dragon Tiger Gate is a Hong Kong action movie through and through and it's only unique claim to fame, beyond featuring a record-breaking-sized punching bag, is an approach to action that's so extreme it starts to become a cartoon.
We're talkin' anime physics here, as in guys are going to be punched CLEAN across the room and thrown through CONCRETE, and still get up.
If you're not sold yet, let me tell you about the story:
Two brothers named Tiger and Dragon (yes those are their real names) grow up apart from one another after attending the Dragon Tiger Gate dojo.
Tiger's a good guy and all about the kicks.
Dragon's a bad guy and all about the punches.
There's also a guy named Turbo. He nunchucks.
Tiger gets wrapped up in Dragon's business and a deal involving Dragon's gang (because it's a Hong Kong action movie, of course there are gangs) goes bad and the gang leader who he's grown attached becomes threatened. The two encounter Turbo who begins attending Dragon Tiger Gate.
Faceless evil bad guy, Shibumi, who was on the other end of the deal decides to destroy Dragon's gang and Dragon Tiger Gate which opposes him so it's up to Dragon, Tiger, and... Turbo to save the day.
Simple enough story and there are even moments of genuine human interaction, but the melodrama kicks it into high gear at about the halfway point and the movie just tries WAY TOO HARD to take itself seriously.
There's even this one point near the end where it gets all existential and philosophical on us just before the characters literally gain anime super powers named things like "Electric Dragon Drill". It's fricken' ridiculous.
Honestly, other than the names, the movie's just goofy to look at. All three of the main characters fight in flowing open jackets and not a one of them can be blamed for cutting more than half their bangs off.
Combat looks and sounds appropriately violent and it just gets fricken' ridiculous with characters being thrown through tables, through walls, overhead, into each other, with weapons spanning swords, sai, poles, halberds, nunchucks, THREE-PART-STAVES, and even a billboard.
Cinematography is fantastic all throughout save the occasionally awkward momentary pause and the music is REALLY good! I'm serious, this stuff gets you pumped and one of the tunes has been an earworm to me for YEARS.
Honestly, it'd be hard not to call this an objectively fantastic movie if not for how HILARIOUSLY bad it can be.
Dragon Tiger Gate is a Hong Kong action movie through and through and it's only unique claim to fame, beyond featuring a record-breaking-sized punching bag, is an approach to action that's so extreme it starts to become a cartoon.
We're talkin' anime physics here, as in guys are going to be punched CLEAN across the room and thrown through CONCRETE, and still get up.
If you're not sold yet, let me tell you about the story:
Two brothers named Tiger and Dragon (yes those are their real names) grow up apart from one another after attending the Dragon Tiger Gate dojo.
Tiger's a good guy and all about the kicks.
Dragon's a bad guy and all about the punches.
There's also a guy named Turbo. He nunchucks.
Tiger gets wrapped up in Dragon's business and a deal involving Dragon's gang (because it's a Hong Kong action movie, of course there are gangs) goes bad and the gang leader who he's grown attached becomes threatened. The two encounter Turbo who begins attending Dragon Tiger Gate.
Faceless evil bad guy, Shibumi, who was on the other end of the deal decides to destroy Dragon's gang and Dragon Tiger Gate which opposes him so it's up to Dragon, Tiger, and... Turbo to save the day.
Simple enough story and there are even moments of genuine human interaction, but the melodrama kicks it into high gear at about the halfway point and the movie just tries WAY TOO HARD to take itself seriously.
There's even this one point near the end where it gets all existential and philosophical on us just before the characters literally gain anime super powers named things like "Electric Dragon Drill". It's fricken' ridiculous.
Honestly, other than the names, the movie's just goofy to look at. All three of the main characters fight in flowing open jackets and not a one of them can be blamed for cutting more than half their bangs off.
Combat looks and sounds appropriately violent and it just gets fricken' ridiculous with characters being thrown through tables, through walls, overhead, into each other, with weapons spanning swords, sai, poles, halberds, nunchucks, THREE-PART-STAVES, and even a billboard.
Cinematography is fantastic all throughout save the occasionally awkward momentary pause and the music is REALLY good! I'm serious, this stuff gets you pumped and one of the tunes has been an earworm to me for YEARS.
Honestly, it'd be hard not to call this an objectively fantastic movie if not for how HILARIOUSLY bad it can be.
One scene has a lady in Dragon's gang approach him all come-hither in a swimming pool and asks him for a tattoo. He draws his lightning bolt insignia on her back and it's all set to this soft piano melody as she tells him that she was meant to kill him and that Shibumi's gang has gone to kill the gang leader. Suddenly BOOM, we smash cut to her SLAMMING into the water and we cut to a prolonged dramatic slow-mo closeup of him having punched her. WOW.
Also, THAT DIALOG...
It could be just the slightly-off-enough-to-be-noticable English dub, but they lay on the cheese SO THICK in this movie you're bound to get a cheese-related analogy.
Also, THAT DIALOG...
Originally Posted by Dragon
What's wrong with you? I'm sorry, but I'm not into heartfelt reunions. I'm not. So go.
Originally Posted by Tiger
You could come back to the Gate if you want. Just don't work for a bad guy.
Originally Posted by Dragon
So... you're a good guy and I'm a bad guy? Well GO AND PLAY YOUR GOOD GUY GAMES!
It's just too awesome not to recommend though even with the occasionally obvious and terrible wire-fu stunts.
If you haven't already I highly suggest you watch Dragon Tiger Gate, preferably with a room full of action junkies ready to make fun of it.
Final Verdict: [Friggen' Awesome]
REWATCH UPDATE 1/1/2023:
I got a hold of a "special edition" copy of the movie with a special feature bonus disc, but unfortunately this version only features English subs. I decided to rewatch it in the Chinese dub and make an actual effort to focus on the story this time around.
My takeaway? Still great. Best comic book movie ever. The wonky English dub is just the cherry on top, like a Jackie Chan movie where he speaks in perfect English.
Jackie Chan is still my favorite movie martial artist, but this still my favorite martial arts movie. It's just realistic enough to make the henchmen being punted through walls, tables, and across ballparks to look sick as ****.
Interestingly, the action choreography here was done by Donnie Yen himself, which I never even knew. He did a fantastic job, and I still think it needs to be emphasized that the camerawork was also pretty stellar. They fit some pretty creative shots all throughout the movie and they clearly modified their sets with the intention of getting those shots.
ANYWAY about the story: It's pretty bog-standard. Tiger and Dragon grew up as brothers(?) at the Dragon Tiger Gate dojo, which is never shown onscreen in flashbacks. Dragon's mom(?) dies in a house fire and he's sincerely adopted by local crimelord, Kun, who he then feels he owes his life to, and consequently breaks his childhood promise with Tiger to "always be a good guy".
Kun is nearing retirement, he's sympathetic towards Dragon, Dragon is torn between returning to Dragon Tiger Gate with Tiger, who he's been forced to fight on a couple occasions already, and eventually he cuts the cord agrees to come back. Happy ending all around!
WELP, this just so happens that some skeevy mini-boss named Scaly decides to backstab Kun and in revenge Dragon wipes out his entire mini-boss gang.
Shibumi, the random kung fu master of the Laoushu Gang (I keep seeing different spellings) which Kun traffics with seeks "a worthy opponent" kills the dojo master of Dragon Tiger Gate.
Supposedly much of this is also predicated on a "Laoushu Plaque" mcguffin which is treated as though it represents a gang's right to some cut of some deals?? I have no idea. There's even a point where Kun advises to give the plaque to Laoushu and this enrages Shibumi for some reason and then it's never spoken of again.
Maybe Shibumi was reacting to Kun losing it in the first place and it's supposed to seem tragic because he was on his way to hand it over anyway? I don't know, either way it's very poorly communicated.
Clearly the particulars of the gang dynamic are much less important to this movie that the relationships of it's characters, which as I've mentioned, is extremely melodramatic. The fight scenes are flying at a million miles per hour, but then the childhood flashback drama feels like such a tonal whiplash. It doesn't help that the child actors aren't great either.
There's also the subplot of Turbo, who's trying to join Dragon Tiger Gate. He's just kinda there to be humiliated and do nunchuck stuff.
However you slice it though, this movie's still rock sold. Great overpowered fight scenes, multiple memorable backing tracks, SUPER cheese throughout... some random super obvious wire-fu, which I normally hate, comes off as charmingly ridiculous considering the absurd scale and quality of the most of the fight scenes.
It's not actor-moving-their-legs-in-a-running-motion-as-a-crane-lifts-them-parallel-to-a-wall for the entire fight like Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon does.
The melodrama is slow and boring, but it's not a terrible story unlike many other martial arts movies, and even action movies in general. It could also be that those scenes just feel disproportionately lethargic compared to the constant batshit intensity of the fights...
Either way, big thumbs up from me, still highly recommend, and still one of the best impulse purchases I've ever made.
Final Verdict: [Great]
If you haven't already I highly suggest you watch Dragon Tiger Gate, preferably with a room full of action junkies ready to make fun of it.
Final Verdict: [Friggen' Awesome]
REWATCH UPDATE 1/1/2023:
I got a hold of a "special edition" copy of the movie with a special feature bonus disc, but unfortunately this version only features English subs. I decided to rewatch it in the Chinese dub and make an actual effort to focus on the story this time around.
My takeaway? Still great. Best comic book movie ever. The wonky English dub is just the cherry on top, like a Jackie Chan movie where he speaks in perfect English.
Jackie Chan is still my favorite movie martial artist, but this still my favorite martial arts movie. It's just realistic enough to make the henchmen being punted through walls, tables, and across ballparks to look sick as ****.
Interestingly, the action choreography here was done by Donnie Yen himself, which I never even knew. He did a fantastic job, and I still think it needs to be emphasized that the camerawork was also pretty stellar. They fit some pretty creative shots all throughout the movie and they clearly modified their sets with the intention of getting those shots.
ANYWAY about the story: It's pretty bog-standard. Tiger and Dragon grew up as brothers(?) at the Dragon Tiger Gate dojo, which is never shown onscreen in flashbacks. Dragon's mom(?) dies in a house fire and he's sincerely adopted by local crimelord, Kun, who he then feels he owes his life to, and consequently breaks his childhood promise with Tiger to "always be a good guy".
Kun is nearing retirement, he's sympathetic towards Dragon, Dragon is torn between returning to Dragon Tiger Gate with Tiger, who he's been forced to fight on a couple occasions already, and eventually he cuts the cord agrees to come back. Happy ending all around!
WELP, this just so happens that some skeevy mini-boss named Scaly decides to backstab Kun and in revenge Dragon wipes out his entire mini-boss gang.
Shibumi, the random kung fu master of the Laoushu Gang (I keep seeing different spellings) which Kun traffics with seeks "a worthy opponent" kills the dojo master of Dragon Tiger Gate.
Supposedly much of this is also predicated on a "Laoushu Plaque" mcguffin which is treated as though it represents a gang's right to some cut of some deals?? I have no idea. There's even a point where Kun advises to give the plaque to Laoushu and this enrages Shibumi for some reason and then it's never spoken of again.
Maybe Shibumi was reacting to Kun losing it in the first place and it's supposed to seem tragic because he was on his way to hand it over anyway? I don't know, either way it's very poorly communicated.
Clearly the particulars of the gang dynamic are much less important to this movie that the relationships of it's characters, which as I've mentioned, is extremely melodramatic. The fight scenes are flying at a million miles per hour, but then the childhood flashback drama feels like such a tonal whiplash. It doesn't help that the child actors aren't great either.
There's also the subplot of Turbo, who's trying to join Dragon Tiger Gate. He's just kinda there to be humiliated and do nunchuck stuff.
However you slice it though, this movie's still rock sold. Great overpowered fight scenes, multiple memorable backing tracks, SUPER cheese throughout... some random super obvious wire-fu, which I normally hate, comes off as charmingly ridiculous considering the absurd scale and quality of the most of the fight scenes.
It's not actor-moving-their-legs-in-a-running-motion-as-a-crane-lifts-them-parallel-to-a-wall for the entire fight like Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon does.
The melodrama is slow and boring, but it's not a terrible story unlike many other martial arts movies, and even action movies in general. It could also be that those scenes just feel disproportionately lethargic compared to the constant batshit intensity of the fights...
Either way, big thumbs up from me, still highly recommend, and still one of the best impulse purchases I've ever made.
Final Verdict: [Great]