A scary thing happened on the way to the Movie Forums - Horrorcrammers

Rewatch? I never even bothered with the first one. I have things to do.

But it’s the best one. It may even provide context that improves both Kills and Ends.

The first one magically did not annoy me, so it gets my recommendation.

Sounds like you need to get hooked on phonics.



Cat. Caaaaaaaaat.

I'll pay you to stop this animal orgy, $10,000 in cash.

I deeply regret making my cute little cat post.

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Repent! Repent!

Hospital Massacre aka X-Ray (1981)

Knocked another one off my Slasher watchlist tonight. Hard to take this one seriously, but it was entertainingly ludicrous.

First of all, our killer looks like kind of a goober, thanks to the head gear. He's in no danger of becoming the next Jason Voorhies, that's for sure.

Throughout the film there are attempts at generating "horror" from normal mundane hospital-related goings-on. At one point a creepy-looking doctor seems to be staring at our heroine. Does he have ill intentions?? No, he's just waiting for her to hang up so he can use the pay phone. Red herring! Later our heroine enters a room to find three completely-bandaged guys in their beds. Based on the way they're thrashing around, I'm pretty sure this was meant to be scary. It wasn't.



The premise of the film is that Barbi Benton, having had some tests done recently, arrives at the hospital in order to get her results. She's in perfect health so she does not anticipate any bad news, but the bad guy has placed bogus X-Rays in her file which suggest that she has some terrible illness. (What this illness is is never revealed to the audience.) I actually thought this idea had some potential. Imagine having to endure a bunch of unnecessary procedures and surgeries based on a misunderstanding. Could've been a nerve-wracking premise but this film isn't quite smart enough to stick with that and instead just relies on the standard slasher stuff. I found the killings less interesting than the fake medical file angle.

Has @Wooley seen this one? I'm not in the medical field and even I was incredulous at what went on in this hospital. This staff follows no standard procedures I've ever seen. This seems to have been written by a person that's never been to the doctor. Also the building seems to have like three working light bulbs.

And can we talk about the unbelievably pervy Doctor? The one who instructs Playboy centerfold Barbi Benton to remove all of her clothes and then....takes her blood pressure?

So yeah, this was fun to watch but not because it's "good", necessarily. I don't remember now who recommended this one but I can see myself re-watching this in the future. Good times.

PS- @Takoma11, there's a "stuck in an elevator" scene.
PPS- The constant lighting of cigarettes in hospital rooms made me chuckle.

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Captain's Log
My Collection

This one had a nice Halloween vibe that was exactly what I was hoping for from this series. It felt like an old Tales from the Crypt comic. Ironically, my favorite episode would turn out to be the one that was the least Halloween -ish, but this one scratches my October itch.


And that last shot legitimately made me squirm.

I bailed when she took all of her clothes off for her "exam." I was not in the mood for that male gaze nonsense.

That's ok, I enjoy Young Doctors In Love, I can probably enjoy this too.

Would lol if Wooley reveals this is standard operating procedure.

This is the only way I can have my blood pressure accurately taken. Something about being in a state of calm to get the best read.

And then they have the gall to tell me “sir, this is a CVS lobby. We’re calling the cops.”

I mean, I'm sad to say that there was a time when it pretty much was.

Ha! I legitimately laughed out loud in my living room. Thank you for that.

*Cliff Booth voice*

I try

This is (intentionally? unintentionally?) an amazing image to have in a thread where Graveyard Rats is being discussed.

Unintentionally, I'm afraid. Just had a thread-appropriate gif from Mark of the Vampire pop up in my Tumblr feed and felt I had to share. (Yes, I use Tumblr. Don't laugh.)