Convert the poster above you

Edit: Okay I changed it, you have to convert them to something, but it can be anything.

I thought this would be a fun idea. It's really simple, you just pick one and describe their conversion. I think it works best if you pretend to be a vampire, werewolf, or zombie once you get turned into one, and then maybe it'll get a bit crazy when people get converted into multiple things...

Okay I'll start. I use voodoo to turn Movie Forums into a zombie. Now it's going to infect the interwebs with it's flesh eating virus and destroy the world!

I am already a zombie. I eat your brain and then you turn into a zombie.

In my brainless stupor I accidentally bump into a werewolf's cage knocking it open and the werewolf bites you turning you into a zombie-werewolf.

Can we alter it to: Convert the poster above into a Christian, Muslim or Jew?

(it might make for a rousing conversation)

Sorry, this internet addiction is making me crazy - I'm commenting on like every thread - using the word "like" in the middle of sentences - and acting like a total d*ck.

You just had to eat my brain... you couldn't just bite me on the hand or something...

That actually does sound hilarious. Then you have to post a mock debate from that religious perspective.

I'm a zombie. I don't do hands.

Oh darn... I tried to edit the title, but I remembered I need to get an admin to do it.

Thanks Yoda for changing it.

I'm going to use my spiritual medallion of "oneness" to convert SC into a Buddhist.

Well, you've got to switch to Christianity because it says that if you don't believe in & accept Jesus (despite whether you've even heard of him, or were a feral child raised by wolves, or grew up just being taught something different because that's what your ancestors handed down) you're going to burn in Hell for all eternity. That pretty much clinches it.
And remember... God is love!

But I'm already a Christian, jokes on you!

Now Captain Steel, I'm converting you into a cyborg. All your vital organs now need very expensive regular tune ups or they don't work properly and you slowly decay into a microwave oven.

I'm heading to Jiffy Lube!

I bribe the Jiffy Lube staff to turn you into a toaster. You're now a cyborg toaster!

I know I paraphrased a bit, but that made me laugh so ******* hard.

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Well, yeah! That's the one thing about Christianity that rubs me the wrong way. As a once-Christian, I always had a hard time conceptualizing that a good Jew, or devout Buddhist or Hindu philanthropist would have to burn in Hell over a technicality, while some serial killer who converts to Christianity on their death bed as a tactic of "hedging their bets" gets a free pass into the pearly gates.
That and the "great commission" (proselytizing). I've never been into trying to sell people on anything they aren't already looking to buy.

Otherwise, I think Christianity is a beautiful philosophy.

I would just prefer religion/philosophy overall to be more of a personal and introspective sort of thing, instead of something so overt and at times incendiary. And I rarely discuss this sort of thing with people, as those of my ilk tend to be less than accepting when confronted with zealotry.

I've loosely discussed my philosophies before on this site, and I'm sure there are a few people here who could deduce the path on which I walk. My philosophy is very personal and the convictions that I hold are definitely not the norm.

Well, it's a bit of a distorted view of Christianity, and an over generalisation. Maybe some churches are like that, but it's not really in line with Scripture. Are you familiar with Total Depravity and Election? I think that would answer your concerns about people perishing without any knowledge of God.