Biggest Nob

Everyone has a price! I personally would, I think it would be fun.

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i hear guys in interviews like "oh, i was so embarassed". i wouldn't be. i would be laughing my head off (no pun intended). i would chase people around and smack them with it. i would walk around naked for as long as they let me.

I dunno about smacking people. Wouldn't that hurt?!?!!?

You guys have never been on a hockey team...

what are you talking about? locker rooms? cause if you are, i can honestly say i haven't played enough sports to be down with the whole locker room atmosphere. i have a friend that's a jock (he's the only jock i'm friends with, come to think of it) who has thousands of homo-erotic horror stories about locker rooms and sports in general, so i've heard it all. anyway, i'm not talking about that. i'm talking about being on a set of a movie, surrounded by all these business types, other actors, the crew, sound guys, directors. tell me it wouldn't be as fun as hell to just run around with your glory flappin in the wind?

I've never found it cool to have people running around, wang-in-hand out to "bite" people. i don't think it'd be pleasant at either end of the situation.

like i said before i would be mortified if it were a locker room, because there are about 50 naked guys standing around and that would be weird. on the set of a movie, you would be the only one naked though, and i would just get a kick out of doing it, i mean. i would run over to the catering line and gross people out

To each his own.

And I'm talking about wangs.

Yeah, I wouldn't like being in a locker room like that anyway. It's not natural to throw a bunch of sweaty naked people who are going through puberty into a room together. Even if they're not interested in each other, their hormones are going to make them act like idiots.

HEY I was in a room in Japan with a bunch of naked people!
I wore a towel though, IT WAS TINY like a NAPKIN! In Japan men & ladies go to public bath houses & nobody cares what you look like. I wouldnt want to go in a locker room with smelly guys though, yuck! I wonder why guys have to pee in urinels where everybody can see their willys? Jest somethin to think about.

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for some reason (i will never get this) jocks love locker rooms. the guy who plays football and basketball that i was talking about earlier says they just jokingly give each other "best ***" awards and stuff like that just to be funny. and there is a lot of running around naked. it's not that i'm insecure, but i think that's freakin gross. what's strange is they're not even gay, a lot of them have super hot girlfriends, they just think that's funny. i would argue if everyone is naked, it wouldn't be too damn hilarious. more like strange. lol. you gotta admit, though, when it's totally inappropriate and out of place, nudity can be damn funny. look at blink 182 or something. i would still do a nude scene in a movie. ha ha.

I would, but I'd have to give it a little rub first so that it looked bigger. Mind you, if it was in a porno I'd have some fluffers to do it for me...

Speaking of locker rooms, what about that scene in Any Given Sunday when Cameron Diaz walks in and those guys are just standing there naked? Impressive.

ok, yet another penis joke because this one is too funny to pass up. it's not a one-liner, but its good:

bill worked in a pickle factory. he had been employed there for a number of years when he came home one day to confess to his wife that he had a terrible compulsion. he had an urge to stick his penis into the pickle slicer. his wife suggested that he should see a sex therapist to talk about it, but bill indicated that he'd be too embarrassed. he vowed to overcome the compulsion on his own. one day a few weeks later, bill came home absolutely ashen. his wife could see at once that something was seriously wrong.

"What's wrong, Bill?" she asked.

"Do you remember that I told you how I had this tremendous urge to put my penis into the pickle slicer?"

"Oh, Bill, you didn't."

"Yes, I did."

"My God, Bill, what happened?"

"I got fired."

"No, I mean what happened with the pickle slicer?"

"Oh . . . she got fired too."

HAHAHA, I think Ill tell that to Pigsnie !!! thats good!

ok, one more joke. maybe.


A rich, lonely widow decided that she needed another man in her
life, so she placed a personal ad that read:

RICH WIDOW LOOKING FOR MAN TO SHARE LIFE AND FORTUNE WITH THE
FOLLOWING QUALIFICATIONS:

1. WON'T BEAT ME UP
2. WON'T RUN AWAY
3. HAS TO BE GREAT IN BED

For several months, her phone rang off the hook, her doorbell was
ringing constantly, she received tons of mail...all to no avail.
None of the men seemed to meet her qualifications.

Then one day the doorbell rang yet again. She opened the door to
find a man, with no arms and no legs, lying on the welcome mat.
Perplexed, she asked, "Who are you and what do you want?"

"Hi," said the man "Your search is over, for I am the man of your
dreams. I've got no arms, so I can't beat you up and I've got no
legs, so I can't run away."

The old woman asked, "What makes you think you're so great in
bed?"

To which he replied, "I rang the doorbell, didn't I?"

oh, man. i'm sorry, i couldn't resist

Thats SICK, hahahahaaaa!!!!!

I would hate to be the person to ring the bell after that.

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"I was walking down the street with my friend and he said, "I hear music", as if there is any other way you can take it in. You're not special, that's how I receive it too. I tried to taste it but it did not work." - Mitch Hedberg

hm... there's another joke i could post... but it just might get me banned.... what does anyone think?

where's daisy been, anyway?

I dont think TWT will ban you but if he does, Ill hold my breath until I turn purple, hahaha.

Just email it to me for a quick review. I check my email 30 times a day, so I'll get back to you really quickly:

[email protected]