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Deadly Weapons, 1974
Crystal (Chesty Morgan) is dating Larry (Richard Towers), who is killed when a little black book goes missing from a crime hit. Crystal decides to use her physical assets--namely epically huge breasts--as a way to get close to the man (Harry Reams) she believes is responsible for Larry's death.
This is a film that you have to greatly qualify when you talk about enjoying it, because for me the enjoyment was like 97% ironic.
The main distinguishing feature of the film is the strange relationship that it has with its main character and her body. I'm not going to pretend that I know what was going through Doris Wishman's mind when she made this film. But it feels a little bit like she went, "Oh, you want big breasts?! Ha! Buckle up, baby!"
Right off the bat, the opening shot is Morgan's chest reflected in convex metal shapes, distorting and splaying her body, almost like it's asking right off the bat how much is too much? The reality of having a huge chest is not a fun one (I know three different women who have had breast reduction surgery, all of whom have referred to it as "the best thing I ever did for myself and my health"), and Wishman does nothing to hide it. Morgan's breasts hang either painfully, pendulously low (see if you can spot where they actually are resting in the picture at the top of this review! Spoiler, when she goes to show them to the guy she unbottons that shirt from the bottom!) or they are crammed into intensely structured garments. A striptease that she performs is probably the most overtly "sexy" moment, but even it is tinged with a weird coldness. I felt like I was watching a woman at the end of a long day wearily taking off her stockings, not like I was being seduced.
I'm sure that being smothered by breasts turns someone's crank. Probably many someones. But if you are not such a someone, this aspect of the movie just feels silly. Like, she has these guys drugged and helpless. In one scene, there is a pillow RIGHT THERE! Movies where women use their bodies to harm men (looking at you, Teeth) always put me off a bit. Why would you want that person's mouth on your body? Gross!
Harry Reams is a bit cartoonish as the evil Tony, but of course he is. This is a movie called Deadly Weapons about a woman killing bad guys with her breasts. (Though that Inspector Gadget hat he wears at one point walks a very fine line!). That said, the movie spends so long bringing him and Crystal together that by the time she's drugging his drink and unracking (sorry!) her deadly weapons, it all feels a bit anticlimactic. There's a character of a girlfriend he has (Denise Purcell) who is used as a proxy for both the sexy and violent stuff related to Tony's character. It's weird because for most of the run time it feels like they exist in different films.
One thing I will say for the film is that it's pretty goofy. While there is an exploitative edge to the way that Morgan's body is used, there's nothing nasty here or that you have to cringe through. I liked that we didn't see Crystal being victimized or anything.
So is it a bad movie? I mean, yes. But I would also recommend it because it certainly put a big smile on my face.
Deadly Weapons, 1974
Crystal (Chesty Morgan) is dating Larry (Richard Towers), who is killed when a little black book goes missing from a crime hit. Crystal decides to use her physical assets--namely epically huge breasts--as a way to get close to the man (Harry Reams) she believes is responsible for Larry's death.
This is a film that you have to greatly qualify when you talk about enjoying it, because for me the enjoyment was like 97% ironic.
The main distinguishing feature of the film is the strange relationship that it has with its main character and her body. I'm not going to pretend that I know what was going through Doris Wishman's mind when she made this film. But it feels a little bit like she went, "Oh, you want big breasts?! Ha! Buckle up, baby!"
Right off the bat, the opening shot is Morgan's chest reflected in convex metal shapes, distorting and splaying her body, almost like it's asking right off the bat how much is too much? The reality of having a huge chest is not a fun one (I know three different women who have had breast reduction surgery, all of whom have referred to it as "the best thing I ever did for myself and my health"), and Wishman does nothing to hide it. Morgan's breasts hang either painfully, pendulously low (see if you can spot where they actually are resting in the picture at the top of this review! Spoiler, when she goes to show them to the guy she unbottons that shirt from the bottom!) or they are crammed into intensely structured garments. A striptease that she performs is probably the most overtly "sexy" moment, but even it is tinged with a weird coldness. I felt like I was watching a woman at the end of a long day wearily taking off her stockings, not like I was being seduced.
I'm sure that being smothered by breasts turns someone's crank. Probably many someones. But if you are not such a someone, this aspect of the movie just feels silly. Like, she has these guys drugged and helpless. In one scene, there is a pillow RIGHT THERE! Movies where women use their bodies to harm men (looking at you, Teeth) always put me off a bit. Why would you want that person's mouth on your body? Gross!
Harry Reams is a bit cartoonish as the evil Tony, but of course he is. This is a movie called Deadly Weapons about a woman killing bad guys with her breasts. (Though that Inspector Gadget hat he wears at one point walks a very fine line!). That said, the movie spends so long bringing him and Crystal together that by the time she's drugging his drink and unracking (sorry!) her deadly weapons, it all feels a bit anticlimactic. There's a character of a girlfriend he has (Denise Purcell) who is used as a proxy for both the sexy and violent stuff related to Tony's character. It's weird because for most of the run time it feels like they exist in different films.
One thing I will say for the film is that it's pretty goofy. While there is an exploitative edge to the way that Morgan's body is used, there's nothing nasty here or that you have to cringe through. I liked that we didn't see Crystal being victimized or anything.
So is it a bad movie? I mean, yes. But I would also recommend it because it certainly put a big smile on my face.