I used to get bullied by someone when I was teenager

It's hard to give advice on your situation without context, and I agree with the comments that a counselor would be able to help you more than we would.

But 20 years later, it's probably best to move on, not even think about them or try to contact them. Even if you wanted them to apologize rather than disregard you, either way, it doesn't offer any tangible value, and you shouldn't care about their approval toward you.

20 years later, you probably have a totally different job, location, social circle, hobbies, goals, etc. In school, you're forced to do things you don't want to do, but now you have a blank canvas, can do nearly anything you want; it doesn't make sense to focus your time/energy on that.

20 years is a long time to hold onto something. If someone told you that they were in love with this person that doesn't want to commit, and only wants friends-with-benefits, and they've been FWB's for 20 years, and the person still thinks there's a chance of getting married, you'd tell them they've been holding onto that bag way too long right? Similar concept applies here.

I had bullies. One died of suicide, and I felt bad for him and his family; I forgave him. But the rest, I don't have any resentment toward them either. They moved on with their lives; marriage/career/kids; maybe they're a kinder person nowadays, maybe they're not, but either way, knowing the answer won't really affect me.

Bullying was an effective experience for me, like most things, I often learn from them.

When I was bullying, I didn't see it as a big deal, in most cases, I still don't, I didn't question why was I bullying someone, I didn't even think of bullying, I could do it, I'd get reaffirmed among others, and that was it, anyone outside the group, I'd sometimes pick on them, test them.

Then, I changed school, I was no longer among the people I knew since the age of 3, that I saw crying on their mother's lap on the first day of pre-school, their mothers worked with my mother, on the same factory since they were 13-years old of age, they were actually not my friends, they were my family.

Now, I was among unknowns, that acted differently. I was bullied, not physically, I was mocked, I think that constitutes as bullying, it was a group of four, I believe, two boys, two girls, one of which, I was attracted to, I'm still hoping I'll see her on a night out and bang her. Anyway, it made me think of two things:

• What is there that they can pick on
• Why are they doing it

The answer to the first question was obvious, I was chubby, I looked young and fresh, I was not confident enough to punch them in the face for it.

The second question was answered by questioning myself why I did it to others once. These four also had problems at home, all of them, some had serious problems, and I was their escape. Obviously, I eventually was integrated in a group, because I could still hold a conversation, and afterward I could make their life miserable, and I didn't, because I understood why they did it, actually, many times I was the one that saved them from the bullying they were going to get into.

Right now, I work in the factories as well, there's lots of pressure, lots of deadlines, and either you're up for it, or you're lesser. Things evolve as you age, they keep being the same only concealed.

Bullies are like bowel movements. Let that shit go

Gosh, that’s romantic.

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I’m here only on Mondays, Wednesdays & Fridays. That’s why I’m here now.

I was bullied as a teenager, too, by two classmates of mine. They will call me names and talk bad about me, in front and behind my back. I have since becoming a Christian, forgiven them and move on with my life.

Sometimes, you just simply need to forgive and move on with life.

Teenagers are immature, and the bully needs to be forgiven for what he or she had done when he or she was immature and young. If you find it hard to forgive the person involved, you may try to seek a counselor.