Quote of the Day

Heard today on "A Prairie Home Companion" while driving to work: "March is the month that God designed to show people who don't drink what a hangover is really like."

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Scarecrow: I haven't got a brain ... only straw. Dorothy: How can you talk if you haven't got a brain? Scarecrow: I don't know. But some people without brains do an awful lot of talking, don't they? Dorothy: Yes, I guess you're right.

"Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died."

~ Anonymous

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"The dog is the god of frolic." ~ Beecher

"Exit, pursued by a bear." ~

"Most doctors I know of have plastic plants."

- Moi

Now, a real one... or two.

"I think Mick Jagger would be astounded and amazed if he realized that to many people he is not a sex symbol, but a mother image."

"I'm an instant star. Just add water and stir."

- David Bowie

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It's what you learn after you know it all that counts. - John Wooden
My IMDb page

"Health food may be good for the conscience, but Oreos taste a hell of a lot better."

~ Robert Redford

"I look at myself as an audience member. I still love movies, and I still go and sit in the back of the big dark room with everybody else, and I want the same thrill."

- Samuel L. Jackson

“Life can only be understood backwards; but it must be lived forwards.”

- Soren Kierkegaard

Some quotes from possibly the best comedy series known to man IMHO Blackadder.

I'm as poor as a church mouse, that's just had an enormous tax bill on the very day his wife ran off with another mouse, taking all the cheese.

Baldrick, does it have to be this way? Our valued friendship ending with me cutting you up into strips and telling the prince that you walked over a very sharp cattle grid in an extremely heavy hat?

If there's one thing I've learnt in the army, it's never ignore a pooh-pooh!

Needs must when the devil vomits into your kettle.

Bloody explorers, ponce off to Mumbo Jumbo land, come home with a tropical disease, a suntan and a bag of brown lumpy things, and Bob's your uncle, everyone's got a picture of them in lavatory.

"Something is always wrong, Balders. The fact that I am not a millionaire aristocrat with the sexual capacity of a rutting rhino is a constant niggle.

Thanks, Bridesmaid. Like the beard. Gives me something to hang on to.

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~In the event of a Zombie Uprising, remember to sever the head or destroy the brain!~

"I find that most people know what a story is until they sit down to write one."

- Flannery O'Connor

For a list of all the ways technology has failed to improve the quality of life, please press three. - Alice Kahn

A mother is not a person to lean on but a person to make leaning unnecessary. - Dorothy C. Fisher

There is only one you... Don't you dare change just because you're outnumbered! - Charles Swindoll

Laughter is inner jogging. - Norman Cousins

"I have a mind to join a club and beat you over the head with it."

- Groucho Marx

I love Groucho.

Age is not a particularly interesting subject. Anyone can get old. All you have to do is live long enough.

I could dance with you until the cows come home. On second thought I'd rather dance with the cows until you come home.

Military justice is to justice what military music is to music.

Women should be obscene and not heard.

There are two ways to slide easily through life: to believe everything or to doubt everything; both ways save us from thinking.

~ Theodore Rubin

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Conventional opinion is the ruin of our souls. - Rumi

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"What might have been and what has been
Point to one end, which is always present." - T.S. Eliot

“Solitude is impractical and yet society is fatal.”
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

"I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it."

- W.C. Fields

"A word to the wise ain't necessary; it's the stupid ones who need the advice."

~ Bill Cosby

"Imagination will often carry us to worlds that never were. But without it we go nowhere."
- Carl Sagan

"Baseball is ninety percent mental and the other half is physical."

"You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six."

"I never said most of the things I said."

- Yogi Berra

Experience hath shewn, that even under the best forms of government those entrusted with power have, in time, and by slow operations, perverted it into tyranny. ~ Thomas Jefferson

"If there is no struggle there is no progress. Those who profess to favor freedom and yet depreciate agitation…want crops without plowing up the ground, they want rain without thunder and lightening. They want the ocean without the awful roar of its many waters…. Power concedes nothing without a demand. It never did and it never will."

- Frederick Douglass, 1857

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something witty goes here......