Corrupt a Wish

Here is a fun (i hope) game. Somebody makes a wish, and the person below grants it, but in an unexpected (and horrible) way, then that person makes a wish and so on and so forth.

Example:

I say, "I wish I had some chinese food," and then someone else responds, "wish granted, but you get food poisoning and can't stop vomiting."

Easy enough game. let me start this off:

I wish I had a nice car.

__________________
"You, me, everyone...we are all made of star stuff." - Neil Degrasse Tyson

https://shawnsmovienight.blogspot.com/

Wish granted. But, it's a restored Pinto.

I wish I had a million bucks.

__________________
I have been formatted to fit this screen.

r66-The member who always asks WHY?

Wish granted but they're the deer kind of bucks, not dollars.

I wish I could play guitar.

Wish granted...

...you will 'play' a guitar in a play called Break the Guitar Slowly.


I wish I had a girlfriend named Betty Sue.

__________________
"Today, war is too important to be left to politicians. They have neither the time, the training, nor the inclination for strategic thought. I can no longer sit back and allow Communist infiltration, Communist indoctrination, Communist subversion and the international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids."

granted, but she's a quadriplegic, blind, deaf, mute, leper

i wish i was immortal

__________________

Your wish is granted...

...you are now Immortal Technique.




I wish I had a whopper right this moment (hurry up, I'm really hungry).

granted but the whopper is made of humans

i wish i could fly

__________________
"A good film is when the price of the dinner, the theater admission and the babysitter were worth it."
- Alfred Hitchcock

Your wish is granted...

...too bad you didn't ask that you could fly well. those walls and trees are gonna hurt.

Last one...I wish I could get even with every sonofabiatch that has denied me my peanut butter.

granted, but the cops catch you and shoot on sight

wish i had one million american dollars

Your wish is granted. But they turn into the creamiest, sweetest peanut butter you ever spread on warm toast. And now you feel guilty for enternity.

I wish I could quit smoking.

Granted, but you get hooked on the nicotine gum while you're at it.

I wish I had a summer job

__________________
Concert Tab!! MOFO poetry Been Dreaming Lately?

Wish Granted, you now have a job cleaning toilets at a bar.

I wish i was taller

__________________
Health is the greatest gift, contentment the greatest wealth, faithfulness the best relationship.
Buddha

Wish Granted. But your legs have been stretched so far that you cannot support your own weight.

I wish I couldn't feel pain

Wish granted. But now you can no longer cry, and everyone thinks you're insensitive.

I wish I had a new computer.

Wish granted, but it's an apple IIe.

I wish it would stop snowing so much.

Wish granted



I wish the power to make the perfect cup of tea in the universe

granted but everyone finds out about your power and they never leave you alone you are making tea for everyone 24/7 with no sleep

i wish i was the smartest person in the world

Wish granted. But being so smart you have no wisdom and you end up killing yourself.

I wish I could garden.

wish granted, but the plants grow so well, they consume your house

i wish i was telepathic

granted, but you can't turn it off and you hear everyones thoughts at all times at the same time and your head explodes.

I wish my landlord would never stop by my apartment again.