Prospero's Horrible Reviews

Thanks! My ego can always use the boost.
I'm glad the reviews are being read, and some folks like them.

As for FvJ, I am an old fart, and am not a big fan of slasher movies in general. Don't get me wrong; I have no problem with gore. It's just that the whole teen's-in-peril (usually stupid teens in peril) schtick seems kind of boring to me. I liked the first Nightmare On Elm Street a lot just because it was so imaginative, but I didn't really watch any more of the series than that (I think I saw New Nightmare, but I don't remember too much about it). I never got into the Friday The 13th series at all.

So not having a history with Freddy and Jason, I couldn't relish the movie the way some folks did. It is fun in a cheesey sort of way, but just not to my taste.

Oh, in case you were wondering, I love Halloween. Here's the review I wrote. It's very short, and I need to punch it up a little, but it's easy to see how I feel about this film.




Halloween (1978)
Directed by John Carpenter
Stars: Jamie Lee Curtis, Donald Pleasance, Nancy Keyes, P.J. Soles

I just finished watching Halloween with my son. He's 13 and this was his first time seeing it. Needless to say, he loved it, and I really enjoyed watching it with him; it 's not often you get to see this movie with someone who's never seen it before.

It's been at least five years since the last time I watched it and I had almost forgotten how brilliant this movie is. Once again we're shown how much can be done on a slim budget. The acting is good (especially by Jamie Lee), and the pacing is spot on. Carpenter has a great instinct for how to build suspense: to foreshadow and then keep us waiting for the inevitable. The camerawork is also terrific, with at least a half dozen memorable shots. And Carpenter's music works well with the rest of the movie, helping to set the general mood of dread and foreboding.

In all, a practically flawless film.

Your interviews are interesting,well done and don't drone.. keep up up the great work

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your reviews are right on target dude

keep it up

Aw, shucks, guys.
Thanks for the encouragement.
I've reviewed lots more than just horror movies, and am thinking of adding them to this thread.

We'll see.

Nice reviews, man.

Any chance of getting Blair Witch (my personal favorite of this genre) and Rosemary's Baby (my second favorite) reviews? I'm interested in what you think about these two.

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"Today, war is too important to be left to politicians. They have neither the time, the training, nor the inclination for strategic thought. I can no longer sit back and allow Communist infiltration, Communist indoctrination, Communist subversion and the international Communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids."

Ravenous (1999)
Directed by Antonia Bird
Stars: Guy Pearce, Robert Carlyle, Jeffrey Jones, David Arquette

Ravenous sucked me in right from the get-go. The movie spends about 15 minutes on exposition and character introduction, and then gets right to the…if you’ll excuse the expression…meat of the film. The movie takes place during the Spanish-American War, and concerns a Captain John Boyd (Guy Pearce), who is assigned to Fort Spencer, an isolated outpost in the western Sierra Nevada Mountains. He arrives in the dead of winter to find that he one in a company of only eight people inhabiting the fort (it’s the off season, apparently).

Soon after Boyd’s arrival, another visitor arrives at Fort Spencer: a Mr. F.W. Calhoun (Robert Carlyle). He is the last survivor of a party of pioneers who got lost in the mountains, and were forced to take shelter in a cave from a winter storm; a storm that left them snowed in and unable to continue on. He tells a horrific tale that sounds like it was lifted straight from the Donner party: first they ate the oxen, then the horses, then their belts and shoes, and then…. well…one of the party died and… Fearing for his life, Calhoun fled when there were only three of the party left, and made his way to Fort Spencer.

The commander of the Fort, Colonel Hart (Jeffrey Jones) mounts a search party, Boyd among them, to try and rescue the remaining members of Calhoun’s expedition. They eventually find the cave, and Boyd and Private Reich (Neal McDonough) go inside to investigate. Once inside, they find what is left of the pioneer band. And then the real horror begins.

There is so much good stuff in this movie that I hardly know where to begin. The director, Antonia Bird, has a way of making the audience (well, me at least) feel the isolation of these men, and how out of touch they are with the rest of the world; of how truly alone they are. The characters are all well drawn, and one can find sympathy for even the worst of them. The performances are all good, although it seemed like David Arquette’s character didn’t have much to do; just giggle and act stoned most of the time (not much of a stretch). But all in all they seemed like real people to me; people who were in this fix, not just characters spouting lines in a play.

The music was kind of hit and miss. Sometimes the twanging folksy sound seemed out of place with what was happening on the screen, but at other times it hit just the right note, sending shivers down my spine.

This is not a movie for the squeamish. It is a story of cannibalism, of superstition and mystical power. It invokes the spirit of vampires drinking the blood of men and werewolves tearing at human flesh, and the ancient Indian legend of the wendigo

Ravenous is a reminder that not all monsters have fangs or masks or razor-tipped fingers. There are monsters who are handsome, cultured and well spoken, and that’s what makes them all the more horrifying.

What I liked most about this film is the choice of casting. Carlyle reminds me of Buscemi in a way. Everybody seems to be drawn to him. Partly because he's extremely talented, and partly because he has a certain charisma that can't quite be defined. Pierce is pretty cool too when he is given a type of role that fits him, which he seems to find more often than not. Also, everybody's favorite pedo is in the cast...how can that be bad?

Eggsackley!!! This is probably the most chilling horror flick I've seen. It creeped me out, and I watched it on a Saturday afternoon while eating fajitas.

Great reviews, here Prospero! Looks like you've found a niche.
I'm so glad to see you here.

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Review: Cabin in the Woods 8/10

Carlyle was great in this movie. As you say, he was perfectly cast. I hadn't thought of the Buscemi connection, but he does have that same sort of odd charisma. Pearce is good, too. I've pretty much liked him in everything I've seen him in. Even The Time Machine.
I wish I could think of something witty to say about Jeffrey Jones, other than perhaps he was drawn to this part because of the availability of fresh meat.
I know some people really hate this movie, perhaps because it vears off into the mystical/magical partway through, but I thought it worked pretty well.

I never get tired of watching this one. It's a really well crafted movie with some terrific performances.
And thanks for the kind words, Sam. It's only though your recommendation that I'm here, so you only have yourself to thank (or to blame).

I've always felt Ravenous was a wonderful and highly underrated film, especially seeing as most of those who I've reccomended it to have thoroughly enjoyed it.

Surprised, though, that you didn't like the score by Blur (and Gorillaz) frontman Damon Albarn and the delightful Michael Nyman, which I personally consider to be one of the best original scores of contemporary cinema.

I'm glad to see the excellent review.

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"We are all worms, but I do believe I am a glow-worm."
--Winston Churchill

The Eye (2002)
Directed by the Pang brothers
Stars: Angelica Lee, Lawrence Chou

I watched an Asian horror film called The Eye for the second time recently. It's not quite as effective on a second viewing, but I still liked it a lot. It's the story of a woman who is given a cornea transplant, and then starts seeing ghosts of the recently and not-so-recently departed, a la The Sixth Sense. She also starts having vivd nightmares of people and places she has never seen. Needless to say, these images are both troubling and frightening to her. She sets out with her psychotherapist to track down the family of the donor to find out the whole story.



Although not as effective as some other Asian horror I've seen, the director still does a good job of communicating the fear and confusion the protagonist is feeling while giving us some pretty good scares. Solid acting by the whole cast (except for Lawrence Chou as the therapist, who seems out of place), add to an emotional, creepy and sometimes frightening film. My only real problem was with the way it ended. What seemed to be the final scene, of the main characters standing around the donor's grave, is followed by another sequence which I don't want to describe in detail, but suffice it to say that it seemed to me that it was a "Hollywood" ending, that ruined the overall mood of the rest of the film. Even so, it's still a movie I would recommend, although it has been panned by some other Asian horror lovers.

Joy Ride (2001)
Directed by John Dahl
Stars: Paul Walker, Steve Zahn, Leelee Sobieski

Joy Ride is a helluva movie. Basically an homage to Stephen Spielberg's 1971 made-for-TV classic Duel, it's the story of three young people being terrorized by a malevolent trucker.

On his way to pick up his girlfriend from college, Lewis Thomas (Paul Walker) stops to bail his loser brother Fuller (Steve Zahn) out of jail. They pass the time by taunting a trucker on their CB radio. Of course the trucker turns out to be a psycho who terrorizes them until they finally think they've appeased him by offering him their abject apologies. But once Lewis and Fuller pick up Lewis' girlfriend (Leelee Sobieski), things start right up again with increased intensity, and the realization that this isn't just any trucker. A sense of the uncanny and possibly the supernatural starts to pervade the film. The tension is cranked up until by the end I was literally gritting my teeth and squirming in my seat.

This movie is smart, well directed, and scary as hell. Highly recommended.

I wouldn't say that I disliked the entire score. At times it was perfectly suited to the move, but at other times it seemed out of place.

The Hills Have Eyes (1977)
Directed by Wes Craven
Stars: Dee Wallace Stone, Robert Houston, Susan Lanier, Martin Speer

This is a movie that I had fond memories of from way back. Sadly, it hasn't held up too well. The subtitle should be Slaughter At The Shallow End Of The Gene Pool.

A family of nitwits gets lost in the desert and are stalked by a family of cannibals. Kind of a Wrong Turn in the desert. With a couple of exceptions, the acting is pretty bad, and the protagonists are mostly irritating and do little to earn our sympathy.

On the plus side, there are a couple of pretty good setpieces, and some of the chase sequences are gripping. It starts off slowly, but definitely picks up in the last twenty minutes or so.

It falls right on the border of /

Really??? I saw a little bit of it on cable one night and thought it looked silly...to say the least. Yet, I only saw the cornfield part of it though. I guess I'll be checking this out someday. If I don't like it, you'll pick up the rental fee, right?

RIGHT?!?!?!

Jeepers Creepers 2 (2003)
Directed by Victor Salva
Stars: Ray Wise, Jonathan Breck, Eric Ninninger

Ever hear the expression "better than a sharp stick in the eye?" This isn't.
It's incredibly repetetive, with characters I couldn't care less about. It doesn't even match up to its questionable predecessor.

It has a cool monster, though, and Ray Wise puts in a good turn as a vengeful father.

Don't see it.

LOL
But of course! I'll write you a check.

I avoided seeing this for a long time, because it looks like just another of those teens-in-trouble movies that I dislike. After having several people recommend it to me, I finally watched it, and was very pleasantly surprised.

The cornfield scene is pretty derivative, but some of the other stuff is damn creepy. I forgot to mention that the voice of the trucker on the CB adds a lot to the movie. Creeped the hell outa me.

Watch it in the dark.
EDIT: I'd be interested in hearing what you thought of it.

Don't do it LordyLord, I have seen it and I do not agree with Prossie, I thought it was weak, Duel was 100 times better.

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I agree that Duel is better (with a script by Richard Matheson and direction by Spielberg how can you go wrong?), but Joy Ride is still very good, IMHO.