Thief's Monthly Movie Loot - 2025 Edition

Frozen follows a trio of friends – Joe (Shawn Ashmore), his best friend Dan (Kevin Zegers), and his girlfriend Parker (Emma Bell) – that are vacationing on a ski resort and end up stranded in a ski lift. Now exposed to the freezing cold and the elements, and knowing that the resort will be closed for a week, the three friends must decide what to do if they want to survive.

This is a film I had seen mentioned or promoted countless of times in social media and elsewhere. I know it didn't have amazing reviews, but I was intrigued by the premise anyway. After all, it is a simple one: three friends stuck in a ski lift, what can they do? Director Adam Green then takes us through the different choices they make and where it leads them.

Wisely enough, Frozen has a 93 minute runtime; maybe it could've been shorter, but I still feel like the film mostly succeeded in stretching this simple premise to a feature length. Even though being stranded in a ski lift doesn't necessarily scream "dangerous!", I liked the way that he made the most out of the different threatening situations they were facing, and how it all affected them mentally and emotionally.

The actors aren't great, but I feel like they did what was necessary. I've liked Ashmore since his X-Men years (and then followed him in a little known TV series called The Following), but I think I was a bit more surprised by Emma Bell. The dialogue is a bit uneven, with some solid emotional moments between the friends as well as some cringey moments.

Overall, I can say I enjoyed the film. I know it might not sound as a compliment, but at a time when I end up dozing off while watching pretty much everything, this film kept my interest. It knows what it is, and delivers it swiftly. It has intense moments, bits of wincing gore, and a somewhat unexpected ending. If you know what you're getting into, you might enjoy it as well.

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Thanks for sharing your ranking, and love to see Hollywood at the top. How much of a drop would you say there is between all of these?

Also, would you say Four Rooms as a whole is worth a shot? I mean, I love Tim Roth, so maybe that should be enough?

Yeah, I agree. I suppose that someone who's more familiar with the exploitation genre might have a bit more latitude with Death Proof and probably a better enjoyment. Again, I enjoyed it but it's easily at #8 or #9 for me.

The Mummy's Ghost is the fourth entry in the original Universal Mummy series. It follows the titular creature which, once again, has returned to find her beloved Ananka, whose soul has apparently found refuge in Amina, a young university student. It is up to her boyfriend Tom (Robert Lowery) to try to save her.

I'm not a big fan of the original 1932 The Mummy; it is probably my least favorite of the bunch. However, for some reason, I keep going back to the franchise. Maybe because I'm drawn to the creature, or maybe because I keep expecting one of them to hit (which hasn't really happened yet).

The Mummy's Tomb is not that far from its predecessors, but I think it is slightly better than them. Like its predecessors, the runtime is kept at 60 minutes. This makes things feel more breezy, and the film doesn't really waste a lot of time to show us the mummy and have it wreaking havoc around town.

In that respect, the film does have a decent pace and some tense moments. Unfortunately, the film suffers from weak characters. John Carradine is wasted as Yousef Bey, the mummy's new handler, while Lowery is your stereotypical bland, young hunk/hero. I do think the very last act lands pretty well, with some good tension and a somewhat shocking ending. Whether that's enough to fulfill the mission, it's up to each of you.

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The top three would be a tier, all close. Four through seven would be a tier. Though if I ranked the Kill Bills as they were released it would be...

4. Kill Bill: Volume 1
5. Inglourious Basterds
6. Django Unchained
7. The Hateful Eight
8. Kill Bill: Volume 2

Barely. As with most such anthology flicks, it just doesn't come off. Unlike New York Stories (1989) there is no one, standout segment that rises above them all that really makes it worth recommending. None of it is Roth's fault, but there's no there there. He's just left mugging his way through a bunch of ho-hum.

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"Film is a disease. When it infects your bloodstream it takes over as the number one hormone. It bosses the enzymes, directs the pineal gland, plays Iago to your psyche. As with heroin, the antidote to Film is more Film." - Frank Capra

Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning follows IMF agent Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise) and his team as they try to stop the threat from a powerful AI system that has gone rogue called "The Entity". This puts him in the path of various characters from his past, like former IMF director Eugene Kittridge (Henry Czerny) as well as Gabriel (Esai Morales), an assassin apparently working with "The Entity" that is also responsible for killing someone from Ethan's past.

That "someone" is never really answered because, like several things in this film, it is left dangling there for the inevitable conclusion. But even with those hanging strands and a runtime of almost 3 hours, Dead Reckoning is still a pretty tight action film full of numerous thrilling setpieces; not that Cruise and McQuarrie haven't gotten us used to it already.

The film starts with the old gang back (i.e. Ving Rhames and Simon Pegg) and shortly after, they rope Ilsa Faust (Rebecca Ferguson) back in again, and then quickly add Hayley Atwell to the mix, a skilled thief that finds herself somewhat unknowingly in the midst of it all. Her addition is one of the best assets of the film because a) she's great, and b) she has insane chemistry with Cruise; and I don't even mean "romantic chemistry". They just play extremely well off each other.

As is customary with this franchise, there are a good bunch of thrilling, action filled setpieces. The most notable for me were a car chase in Rome and a cat-and-mouse heist aboard the Orient Express towards the end. There's also the iconic bike jump/dive which, although thrilling, doesn't really take a lot of time. All of these, and the some, succeed in keeping an energetic pace and never really letting go.

But something that the franchise has succeeded in since M:I-3 is bringing up tangible stakes. As action-filled as it is, you can still feel these are human beings with emotions battling it out there. This is a credit to Cruise as producer and de facto showrunner, but also to McQuarrie's abilities as a writer. However, I wish they would've put a bit more of that work in creating a better threat than a "magical" rogue AI that can sorta do anything/everything.

The counterpart is that the Entity's liaison, Gabriel, is neatly portrayed by Morales. Despite a constant calm exterior, you can still feel the threat boiling inside of him. Even though I'm still not sure about the attempt to tie him to Ethan's pre-IMF past, his performance is really good. Speaking of Ethan's past, it was certainly good to see Czerny back again as Kittridge, so to answer to his question above: Yes, this accomplished the mission and then some.

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That's how they welcome a new group of soldiers at Kamdesh Outpost in Afghanistan. The mission here? To stay alive. But Kamdesh's location at the bottom of a remote valley, surrounded by mountains is going to make that mission really hard, regardless of how good or bad of a soldier you are.

Set during the "War on Terror", The Outpost follows the soldiers stationed at Kamdesh as they try to survive attacks by Taliban forces. Led by Captain Keating (Orlando Bloom), the group is used to fend off random attacks every day. However, things go awry when the enemy stages an attack with hundreds of soldiers threatening the safety of everyone.

This is a film I had seen mentioned in a couple of "Best Recent Action Films" list, but I just hadn't pulled the trigger on it yet. However, I was looking for something action-y that night, and this one delivered the goods. Not only does it have intense action sequences, but it manages to put forward a couple of really solid characters that are easy to root for.

The main ones that stand out are Sgt. Clint Romesha (Scott Eastwood), Specialist Ty Carter (Caleb Landry Jones), and Lt. Andrew Bundermann (Taylor John Smith). All three actors have good performances and their characters have simple, but solid arcs. The rest of the supporting cast suffers a bit from being indistinctive at times, but it doesn't detract that much from the film.

The film does give a similar vibe to Black Hawk Down in more ways than one; group of soldiers trapped in enemy territory as endless hordes of enemies surround them. Even the close-up directing style is similar, but that doesn't mean it's not effective. I do wish the "enemies" were made to be more than just an "endless horde", but that's probably a matter for a different film. The mission here is to stay alive, and this one does.

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My dad borrowed this off me and watched it yesterday, coincidentally - I'd been talking to him about when I was a kid and how obsessed I was with Raiders of the Lost Ark - after seeing it with my parents when it came out at the movies, I was such a fan that I demanded they take me to see it again nearly every weekend, and so my mother and father alternated to help lessen the load on them. It was the first movie I ever owned on VHS - and I watched it often - I was crazy about it. Always like to hear that there were others in the same boat.

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Whoa, I actually have a friend on my Discord server who just watched this; he said it was decent overall, and effectively tense in all the right moments, but he still prefers the 2013 Frozen, heh.

Truth is that you could play "Let It Go" over both films

Again, no usual challenge for last month, but here's my summary for MARCH 2025:

Action films: Crank, Death Proof, Raiders of the Lost Ark, Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning, The Outpost
Horror and mystery films: The Ritual, Number Seventeen, Idle Hands, Frozen, The Mummy's Ghost
Short films: Tea with Alice, Marooned, Reservoir Dogs (1991)
Other films: Life of Pi, Night Moves, Early Man, The Prank




It was a pretty solid month, with a good bunch of pretty good, solid watches. My favorite first-time watches would probably be Life of Pi, Night Moves, and Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning, but both The Ritual and The Outpost would be close behind.

The weakest first-time watch would probably be The Mummy's Ghost, with Crank not that far behind.

Shame you didn't take to Crank. Although maybe its taste isn't for all people...

Life of Pi might be one of the best uses of 3D in their attempted re-emergence of the technology. Probably because they had a talented director that knew how to use it with a compelling story.

Crank still fell in the middle for me (2.5) so it's not like I hated it, but it's just what it is; a dumb action film. I've heard good things about the sequel, and by good I mean crazy.

My Tarantino Ranking:

1. Pulp Fiction
2. Kill Bill 1-2
3. Reservoir Dogs
4. Inglorious Basterds
5. Jackie Brown
6. Death Proof

Haven't gotten into QT's latter films due to their length.

Also, the only one of these I wouldn't recommend is Death Proof. Although Kurt Russell, Rosario Dawson and Zoe Bell are solid, the film has a repetitive nature that sucks a lot of fun out of things once you know what Stuntman Mike is all about. Although I am curious to see if Vanishing Point would be worth my time...

I would still recommend you to check out his other films whenever you have the chance, especially Once Upon a Time in Hollywood.

Humans and animals share various traits; physiological, emotional, and behavioral. These range from similar physical structures to similar emotional responses, like fear or happiness. However, one of the main differences between both species is how animals rely on instincts to respond and react. Instincts that we might be drawn to and may come to the surface in moments of hunger, anger, lust, or jealousy.

Cat People follows Irena Dubrovna (Simone Simon), who might or might not be one of those that is struggling with feelings of self-doubt and regret, and might be drawn to those "animal instincts". Despite falling in love with Oliver (Kent Smith), she refuses any physical contact because she "fears the panther" she might turn into, something she believes traces back to her ancient Serbian heritage.

Even though I've only seen a handful of his films, I'm a fan of Tourneur. He has a very distinct and elegant visual style that goes from the way he moves his camera to his shot selection, close-ups, etc. This might also be a credit to cinematographer Nicholas Musaraca (who also shot Out of the Past with Tourneur), but whoever it is, there's some pretty solid camera work in this film.

Aside from that, the intrigue regarding Irena's nature is what drives the film. The performance from Simon ranges from charming and innocent to unstable and threatening. There is an odd vibe to her that I think fits the character and the plot really well. Smith is good as Oliver, but I feel the film rests mostly on Simon's shoulders, as well as the build-up of tension and menace from Tourneur.

Aside from Simon's interesting performance and the strengths of Tourneur's direction, I think the film succeeds because of how unconventional it is. This is not your stereotypical supernatural horror film with your stereotypical supernatural villain. There is something different here that comes out of anger, lust, jealousy. Something that we're inevitably drawn to, and just can't resist.

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Someone once said "Blessed is he who expects nothing, for he shall never be disappointed." This is a somewhat cynical statement to how the expectations we have about others are often not met. The above exchange between Professor Hathaway (William Atherton) and genius Chris Knight (Val Kilmer) is an example of that; not only regarding the expectations the professor had in Chris, but also those that Chris had about his own abilities and future.

Real Genius follows Mitch Taylor (Gabe Jarret), a teen prodigy that has his own expectations about Chris; expectations that are once shattered when he is roomed with him in college and finds out he is more of a "slacker". Despite their differences, both geniuses have to learn to work together as they are tasked by Hathaway to complete a special project. But will this project be what they expect as well?

This is a film that was recommended by a good Internet friend a while ago, but that I never got to. However, with Kilmer's death last week, I decided to give it a shot. In a way, I was also a victim of expectations as the film, although not bad at all, ended up not being as good as I hoped. The one thing that surpassed my expectations? Kilmer, who is great as the wise-cracking genius.

Jarret, on the other hand, suffers from the "straight man syndrome". His performance is not bad, but even though he is arguably the lead, his "straight man persona" can't help but be overshadowed by Kilmer's funnier and more colorful performance/character. Meanwhile, Atherton does what he does best playing the a$$hole Hathaway. There is a rivalry with other students led by Kent (Robert Prescott) that plays more or less how you would expect, until it takes a weird turn in the last act.

In addition, there are a couple of female characters that feel like they were victims of editing or rewrites, and end up feeling like "left field" odd ducks in Chris' story. The one slight exception is probably Jordan (Michelle Meyrink) who ends up being Mitch's love interest. Their relationship feels honest and charming enough for us to root for, especially because Jordan is as much of an outcast as them and is not forced to "change" who she is.

The film is best when exploring those contrasting and symbiotic relationships; Chris and Mitch, Mitch and Jordan, etc. However, expectations plague the characters in more ways than one as Hathaway has them work for what they think is a school project, but turns out to be him using their smarts to build a laser that will be used by the Department of Defense. That story ends up feeling a bit too serious and ambitious when paired with the juvenile teen comedy antics of the rest of the film.

Overall, Real Genius ends up being a competent teen comedy that's a bit different from others, despite an awkward overarching plot that doesn't necessarily mix well with the rest. However, it is all kept afloat by earnest and honest characters and a brilliantly funny performance from Kilmer, who more than met my expectations with his witty dialogue and delivery.

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Before the 90s, Disney and other animation studios would sporadically cast notable actors for their voice roles. It was not the standard, but it happened. However, in 1992 Disney made the decision to cast Robin Williams as the Genie in their upcoming film Aladdin and the game was not the same. Williams performance has been praised, often imitated, but never duplicated, and injects this film with an unrivaled energy.

For those that have been lost in the desert, Aladdin follows the titular character (Scott Weinger), a petty thief living in the streets of Agrabah who somehow ends up with Williams' Genie at his service. Having met beautiful Princess Jasmine (Linda Larkin), Aladdin tries to use his wishes to pretend being a prince to hide his true self and impress her, all while the evil Jafar (Jonathan Freeman) tries to gain control of the lamp as well.

I saw Aladdin some time during the 1990s. I must have been already in my mid-to-late teens, but I still fell captive to the film's charm and energy. A big part of that comes from the fun and well-paced script and the wonderful musical collaborations from Howard Ashman and Alan Menken, but a big part of it comes from Williams game-changing performance.

Williams is undeniably himself as the Genie, even ad-libbing a lot of his dialogue and impersonating the likes of Jack Nicholson, Rodney Dangerfield, and Ed Sullivan, among many others. And yet, he crafts a character that feels complete and somehow still apart from himself. It's no wonder that Disney gave Williams the shaft to somehow capitalize on his character.

But aside from the Genie, Aladdin is full of great characters and great voice-work from pretty much everybody. Weinger brings boyish charm as the lead while Larkin builds a character that still feels as progressive and determined as it was back then. However, my favorite remains the great Jonathan Freeman as the evil Jafar. His voice work is both fun and menacing, and he has a wicked cackle to boot.

Needless to say, this is my favorite animated film. I've seen it a hundred times, know the dialogue by heart, owned the soundtrack, and still love to sing along to it often. There's a reason why I held on to it for a while before showing it to my kids this weekend. Why? It all circles back to Williams cause I didn't want them to experience it dubbed in Spanish by some Williams' imitator. But now that they're a bit older, I let them experience the ever-impressive, often imitated, but never duplicated... Robin Williams.

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That's the assurance that a character tries to give former go-go dancer and wannabe stand-up comedian Cherry Darling (Rose McGowan) at some point; that no matter how useless some skills might seem now, they might come in handy at some point later. Something that is proven right as far as the film story goes, but also as far as its conception, filming, and production.

Directed by Robert Rodriguez, Planet Terror is the first half of the Grindhouse double-bill he concocted with his friend Quentin Tarantino. Paired with Tarantino's own Death Proof, Planet Terror finds a use for a ton of seemingly "useless talents" – grainy film, narrative shortcuts, and even a missing reel! – to successfully pay homage to how low budget exploitation films were released in the 70s.

Having seen Death Proof last month, I decided to give this one a shot as well. I love Tarantino, I think he's the better filmmaker, and I thought Death Proof was a solid effort. However, I won't deny that I ended up more satisfied with Rodriguez' outing here. For all the intentional "gimmicks" they both pull here, Planet Terror just seems more aware about what it's trying to be, and more consistent with its execution.

The film follows Cherry as she tries to survive a zombie outbreak along with an assorted group of survivors. There is her mysterious ex-boyfriend El Wray (Freddy Rodriguez), Sheriff Hague (Michael Biehn) who is hot on his trail for some reason (that is never explained!), Dr. Dakota Block (Marley Shelton), a bisexual anesthesiologist running from her abusive husband, and more. This randomness is part of the beauty of the film, as they all have to connect the dots and find use for their "useless talents" to survive.

The film is full of absurdities, but it is in that where most of the fun lies. That, and all the clever ways that Rodriguez uses to mimic the low budget aspect. There are corny lines of dialogue, ludicrous plot twists, ridiculous gore, excessive splatter, lots of people with guns, and a scantily clad heroine with a machine gun stuck on her leg. Things that might seem pointless or useless otherwise, but Rodriguez still finds clever ways to use it all. Like connecting the dots.

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That's how a white junior barber (Chris Bostrom) tries to recover after a mishap with a black customer (Christopher Hampton) at a barbershop. But his inability to cut the client's hair is just an excuse for the filmmakers to put forward frequent long-standing racist stereotypes and feelings among a lot of people.

Directed by Erik Sandoval and written by Nika Patrice, White Barber is, on the surface, a fairly simple, 5-minute short that follows this customer as he's trying to get a haircut; something that shakes up the young barber, first because of insecurities about his skills, but then about his own racist feelings.

Technically speaking, the short is fairly well made. None of the performances stand out but they do the job. However, there is something interesting about how it chooses to present its underlying themes, that I think makes it worth a watch.

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