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Ilsa: She Wolf of the SS

Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS
(Don Edmonds, 1975)

Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS, my first foray into the swastika-wearing section of grindhouse cinema, definitely lives up to its notorious billing. There's an assembly line of butts, boobs and pubic bushes to go along with golden showers and syphilitic injections. Not to mention various methods of sadistic torture and more sex than a late-night skin flick. Throw in some genital mutilation, a little bit of electrode penetration, a few withheld ejaculations, and what we've got here is a glorious slice of exploitation at its sleaziest, smuttiest, trashiest, most tasteless, morally-debased finest.

What's most surprising, however, is that Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS is surprisingly feminist. Dyanne Thorne, the bad-ass bitch with mountainous breasts and an unquenchable sexual appetite, essentially spends the majority of the film reaming chauvinistic attitudes with a 12-inch strap-on (in a metaphorical sense) while literally chopping off penises and pissing on her commanding officers. In various experiments she also proves that women are more capable than men at withstanding extraordinary levels of pain. Too bad the feminist angle is almost entirely undone by the lone American who defeats her with his sexual prowess. (That's right -- we Americans are capable of conquering Nazism with our red, white and blue balls. Heil Schlong!)

The novelty of this being my first Nazisploitation film probably kept the cycle of sex and torture from feeling overly repetitive. The gore is disturbing despite the many appearances of bright red paint. The accents are awful but hilarious. The final act features some decent action. And I'm pretty sure everything that happens in the film is 100% historically accurate. Schindler's List pales in comparison to this fine piece of art.