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This franchise theoretically should have been a part of my childhood memories. It was very popular back in the day. In fact, most of the people I know have seen it. It's a fantasy movie, which I love, and so I honestly don't know how it happened that tonight was the first time I saw it. Still, I'm probably better for it because now that I'm a grown-up, I can see it for what is really is.
And what it really is is fake. Unbelievably fake. First of all, for a fantasy movie, it's not very magical and imaginative. Every character and theme in the movie is just a mixture or a direct copy from something that's already been done. There nearly no originality in this at all. You have your orcs, your talking animals, your ice queen or whatever, your unicorns and so on and so forth. And then, in terms of the story, you have your usual prophecy-driven battle of good vs. evil.
And all of that would be wonderfully insignificant but take a look at the following quote from RottenTomatoes:
This has got to be the first time I've seen the critics consensus quote to be a completely opposite description of what a film is like.
First of all, the "first-rate" special effects are actually utterly rubbish. And I don't mean early 2000s rubbish, I mean rubbish, full stop. That would be ok, except this is a fantasy movie, and if you want your stuff to look convincing, realistic and magical, you've got to have decent special effects. I'm not saying you can't enjoy a fantasy movie without them, but they are a significant part of the illusion. There's crappy CGI everywhere, obvious green screens where they didn't need to be, and what little props there are that aren't computer generated might as well be, because they are of such poor quality. The swords, for instance, are very clearly made of plastic.
Now let's talk about the "will please moviegoers of all ages" part. Excuse me, but that's just not true. In fact, this movie shouldn't please anyone. The story is quite childish. It's simple, straightforward, easy to follow. So it's for little children right? Well, let's just say that the Disney logo should be overlaid onto the frames during the main battle in which creatures are slashed, pierced with swords, and bitten to their deaths. So it's for adults, right? With a story like this most adults would probably fall asleep during the movie. The only age group I think would be even remotely satisfied by Chronicles of Narnia are teenagers, but then why would they watch this cheap version of The Lord of the Rings, while they can watch... The Lord of the Rings, for instance?
All in all, the movie is an utter piece of garbage and a waste of time. It could work if it wanted to be something simpler, but then the movie had to follow a book, so it really couldn't. As a result we got something which should have been done with more imagination and, most crucially, with more money. It really puzzles me why this thing was so popular, and why it got such good ratings on RT. It's worthless.
The Chronicles of Narnia (2005)


This franchise theoretically should have been a part of my childhood memories. It was very popular back in the day. In fact, most of the people I know have seen it. It's a fantasy movie, which I love, and so I honestly don't know how it happened that tonight was the first time I saw it. Still, I'm probably better for it because now that I'm a grown-up, I can see it for what is really is.
And what it really is is fake. Unbelievably fake. First of all, for a fantasy movie, it's not very magical and imaginative. Every character and theme in the movie is just a mixture or a direct copy from something that's already been done. There nearly no originality in this at all. You have your orcs, your talking animals, your ice queen or whatever, your unicorns and so on and so forth. And then, in terms of the story, you have your usual prophecy-driven battle of good vs. evil.
And all of that would be wonderfully insignificant but take a look at the following quote from RottenTomatoes:
With first-rate special effects and compelling storytelling, this adaptation stays faithful to its source material and will please moviegoers of all ages.
First of all, the "first-rate" special effects are actually utterly rubbish. And I don't mean early 2000s rubbish, I mean rubbish, full stop. That would be ok, except this is a fantasy movie, and if you want your stuff to look convincing, realistic and magical, you've got to have decent special effects. I'm not saying you can't enjoy a fantasy movie without them, but they are a significant part of the illusion. There's crappy CGI everywhere, obvious green screens where they didn't need to be, and what little props there are that aren't computer generated might as well be, because they are of such poor quality. The swords, for instance, are very clearly made of plastic.
Now let's talk about the "will please moviegoers of all ages" part. Excuse me, but that's just not true. In fact, this movie shouldn't please anyone. The story is quite childish. It's simple, straightforward, easy to follow. So it's for little children right? Well, let's just say that the Disney logo should be overlaid onto the frames during the main battle in which creatures are slashed, pierced with swords, and bitten to their deaths. So it's for adults, right? With a story like this most adults would probably fall asleep during the movie. The only age group I think would be even remotely satisfied by Chronicles of Narnia are teenagers, but then why would they watch this cheap version of The Lord of the Rings, while they can watch... The Lord of the Rings, for instance?
All in all, the movie is an utter piece of garbage and a waste of time. It could work if it wanted to be something simpler, but then the movie had to follow a book, so it really couldn't. As a result we got something which should have been done with more imagination and, most crucially, with more money. It really puzzles me why this thing was so popular, and why it got such good ratings on RT. It's worthless.