damn, well i guess people don't really like to think about how they are going to die.
In fact I voted for the 'saw' thing, even though these films aren't even on my to-watch list. I could just as well elaborate a bit.
I'm a freaky christian protestant atheist kind of thing, meaning, prone to guilt trips and panic responsibility attacks (the cube is us, the cube is us), also morbidly allergic to injustice. So, no matter what happens to me, no matter how I die, my only relief would be to
understand how and why I'd
deserve what is happening. To relieve the outrage at the terrifyingly indifferent randomness of life. To be able to go "okay, fair enough". I wish,
some stuff,
some times, in life, to please be "fair enough" once in a while if that isn't too much to ask.
But there's no one to ask.
I guess, I don't even look for meaning anymore, I just regret its absence. It would be nice to have a bit of it at that quite significant moment, and feel some peace and agreement about that at least.