led_zeppelin's reviews

[led_zeppelin]

Ok, I'm gonna go along with everyone else and review some movies. If any of these movies have been reviewed already, sorry.

http://www.technofile.com/images/reservoir_dogs.jpg

The plot: Joe Cabot and his son Nice Guy Eddie, are forming a robbery and the main players have never seen each other before. They are all to wear the same suit and sunglasses so they can't be identified. The robbery consists of Mr. White, Mr. Blonde, Mr. Pink, Mr. Brown, Mr. Blue and Mr. Orange. One of the members is a cop informer, and the movie is based around what happens after the robbery. Although it's typical Tarantino, so it's non-lineal, but not really that hard to follow. The dialogue is great, they actually talk like real people. Not the macho gangsters you usually see, they actually have senseible dialogue. Although it's nasty, it's great. The movie has it's share of violence, but not too much. The "ear" scene was hard to take the first time, but besides that, yeah it's kind of violent, but not like "look away" violent. Mr. Blonde and Mr. White top the list of bad-asses though. So if you wanna see great filmwork, watch this movie. I recommend it to any Tarantino fan obviously, and then for any fan of independant movies. Or just a fan of movies, you should watch it atleast once.

I give it a 4/5

(this is obvioulsy my first review on here, so be gentle. They'll get better.)

[John McClane]

Ok, I'm gonna go along with everyone else and review some movies. If any of these movies have been reviewed already, sorry.

http://www.technofile.com/images/reservoir_dogs.jpg

The plot: Joe Cabot and his son Nice Guy Eddie, are forming a robbery and the main players have never seen each other before. They are all to wear the same suit and sunglasses so they can't be identified. The robbery consists of Mr. White, Mr. Blonde, Mr. Pink, Mr. Brown, Mr. Blue and Mr. Orange. One of the members is a cop informer, and the movie is based around what happens after the robbery. Although it's typical Tarantino, so it's non-lineal, but not really that hard to follow.

I give it a 4/5

(this is obvioulsy my first review on here, so be gentle. They'll get better.)Hey it's a good first attempt. Might I recommend a few things. First, talk a little bit about what you like in the film along with what you got. Second, take your time and do your best. If it takes you 2 or more days, don't worry that's what makes you cut it short. I did better much the same thing with my first, I cut it off short because I got tired of it. Thirdly, have fun and just do your best. That's all I have to say the big guys will be able to help you out more than me. By the way don't be sorry about reviewing films that've already been reviewed; it's nice to read more then one review on a movie, gives you a better view on the film. Just keep at it and try harder every time you write a new review and I guarantee you'll inprove, I know I did. Keep it up you go getter.

[poeman]

u gave reservoir dogs 4/5 but i thought it was your favorite movie zepplin

[led_zeppelin]

u gave reservoir dogs 4/5 but i thought it was your favorite movie zepplin

really? did I say that? my favorite movie is actually Mystic River. Reservoir Dogs is my 5th fav. If I was misleading I'm really sorry.

[John McClane]

I plan on seeing this thanks to you. Another thing, GOOD JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Try hard and you'll go far.

[led_zeppelin]

Here, I'll try to do better this time around.

http://images.amazon.com/images/P/6304698798.01.LZZZZZZZ.jpg

This is my 3rd favorite movie of all time.
Plot: In a nutshell, three men during the Civil War trying to find 200,000 dollars. Now that is a really short review, so I'll try to elaborate. Angel Eyes (Lee Van Cleef) is trying to find a man named Bill Carson so he can get his hands on that money. And after a long process, Blondie (Eastwood) and Tuco (Eli Wallach) get involved and after many betrayels on Tuco and Blondie's part, they end up in a graveyard and a showdown happens between all three. If you want a longer review just say so and I'll go through the whole movie, but that would take up a lot of room so I shortened it big time. Like I said, just give the word and I'll make it longer.

Ok, what I like about this film is the characters are developed in a way that if they're a good guy, like Eastwood, no matter what you're rooting for him. If the character is Bad (Van Cleef) then after the movie gets going you don't like him at all. Tuco (Wallach) you don't care. It's kind of like Joe Pesci in the Lethal Weapon series, you learn to like him. There are great moments of tension through the film, when Sergio Leone wants you to feel tension, Sergio Leone does it. Probably the best moment of tension in film is the graveyard showdown. We all know Eastwood lives (der) but between Wallach and Van Cleef, you don't know until it happens. Just because Wallach and Eastwood USED to be partners, remember that they've all betrayed each other throughout the movie. It's just. . .AHHH MAN it's so cool. Van Cleef does a wonderful portrayel of "the Bad". He's the type of guy you don't wanna mess with. But Eastwood tops the list. To me, Mr. Blonde, Mr. White and Blondie are the ultimate movie bad-butts. hehe Judging what I said before about Mr. Blonde and Mr. White, Clint could take em'. Tuco is just pretty much comin-relief, but a good gunfighter. This film along with Fistfull of Dollars and For a Few Dollars More, were the quentacential "spaghetti westerns." The Good the Bad and the Ugly is by far the most violent western that I've seen. The torture scene with Tuco getting the crap kicked out of him is hard to watch the first time around. And then there is the score by the master Ennio Morricone. The opening title music is some of the best EVER! That yell and then the wahh WAHHH Wahhhh, just classic. This score is up there with Star Wars and JAWS for my opinions of the best movie scores ever. Clocking at 161 minutes, this is a long one, but worth every minute. This movie is not to be overlooked by any fan of film in general.

I give it a 4.5/5

[poeman]

great review... now you've reviewed this like i told Ezkiel you MUST review once upon a time in the west also. that movie alone scares eastwoods pants. the best western ever, and its my favorite film and I HATE WESTERNS :)

[Robert_Plant]

Hey Luke you spelled comic-relief wrong. hehe ;)

[John McClane]

Great review man. I loved it. You did good on the plot and you added some good stuff. Keep up the good work.

[Garrett]

Excellent review... I especially like the way you compared Eli Wallach's character in GBU to Joe Pesci's character in the Lethal Weapons series, it's a very accurate comparison. :)

[Mark]

Good choice of films to review.

I'm wondering the same thing as Poeman. You're a tough critic! Your 5th favorite film of all time gets a 4/5 and your 3rd favorite gets a 4.5? Does that mean only Mystic River is worthy of a 5?

Heck, I think my top 50 would probably get a 5, while 51-100 would get a 4.9! :laugh:

Regarding The Good, Bad, and the Ugly: Of the three films in the "Man with No Name" series, I think I like For a Few Dollars More the most. I know that G,B,U gets the most critical acclaim, but there's something about the second one that entertains me more. Although Eli Wallach and the music throughout in G,B,U are incredible. And, of course, the entire cemetary scene is awesome. However, one of the best scenes of all three, in my opinion, is in For a Few...: The scene in which Lee Van Cleef strikes a match on the hunchback's ear at the bar. The hunchback's buddies stop him from drawing on Van Cleef, but the editing going back and forth from the guns to the eyes builds so much suspense. I LOVE it!

By the way, as mentioned above, this "trilogy" is often referred to as "The Man with No Name," however, Eastwood's character from A Fistful of Dollars was name "Joe."

[led_zeppelin]

See? I told you I'd get better. :D

[led_zeppelin]

Hey Luke you spelled comic-relief wrong. hehe ;)

Your a bloody wanker you know that? ;) Just kidding, wait, why am I talking like this, I'm not eve british! Not that there is anything wrong with that!

[led_zeppelin]

http://www.talkcinema.com/webart/high_fidelity.jpg

Plot: Rob Gordon (John Cusack) owns a record store called Championship Vinyl, along with Dick (Todd Louiso) and Barry (Jack Black). Rob's girlfriend Laura (Iben Hjelie) just broke up with him, sending him through a "mid-life crisis". As his store is going under because the only customers they get are drivin off by Barry because he doesn't have the same taste, another part of Rob's life is crappy. So he goes through is top 5 "desert island" most memorable break-ups and then tracks them all down to figure out why he was dumped. Then he starts a rivalry with Ian (Tim Robbins) for going out with Laura. Rob also meets Marie DeSalle, a folk/country singer who plays at local clubs. So basically the whole movie is him going through all these things trying to figure out why he's such a loser, and then trying to get back with Laura again.

What I like about it is that it draws a fine line between being a comedy and drama. John Cusack gives a great drama/comedy performance throughout the film, where as Jack Black is just awesome and funny the whole way through it. So what I'm basically saying is the drama is real. . .dramatic, and the comedy makes you laugh out loud almost every time. Atleast that's how it is for me. Barry (Jack Black) is the most memorable character, just because he's the funniest. I mean we're all going to remember John Cusack, but Jack Blacks steals every scene he's in. Based on the novel (which I just finished yesterday) written by Nick Hornby, the movie is one of the better book adaptations that I've seen. Kudos to Nick Hornby and Steven Frears for pulling it off.

I give it a *** 1/2

[Piddzilla]

Nice to see that you too are doing reviews, Zep! Keep it up, dude! :yup:

[John McClane]

I've been wondering about this film. Thanks for the review. Keep up the good work.

[Sedai]

Good work Zepp!

_S

[led_zeppelin]

Thank you all very much for your replys.

http://www.technofile.com/images/city_slickers.jpg

Plot: Mitch's (Billy Crystal) life is in a rut. He has gotten so bad at his job that if he wants to make a decision, the only way he can think about it is to talk to his boss. His two friends Phil (Daniel Stern) and Ed (Bruno Kirby) aren't much better. Phil comitted adultry with a checkout girl at his wife's father's store, and at Mitch's b-day party, the girl came to the house to tell Phil she was pregnant. As you could tell Arlene (who has already caused Phil to wanna die in a meat grinder) wasn't happy, so the divorced. Ed is married to a 24 year old underwear model and is obsessed with proving that he's a man by taking Mitch and Phil along with him for outlandish and dangerous outings. The first scene of the movie is the trio doing the "Running of the Bulls" in Spain. So they decide to go on a cattle drive to maybe get out of the rut and become happier, along with meeting new friends. And from there on it's intense drama, and hilarious comedy, and a couple "heart-warming" moments. Such as the cook getting drunk and causing a stampede with a smiley face drew on his naked anus. If that's not heart warming I don't know what is.

This film is great in many ways. First off, it's funny. Billy Crystal is at his best, and so is his supporting cast. I'm used to seeing Bruno Kirby in dramatic parts (Sleepers, Basketball Diaries) but he pulls off comedy so well. Secondly, the cast. Along with the main three, the film stars Bill Henderson, Josh Mostel, Patricia Wettig and last but certainly not least, Jack Palance as the bad-a** guide. There ain't have bad dramatic scenes in it either, so it's got it all. Great cast, great comedy and great drama. I recommend this to pretty much anybody, as I usually do.

I give it a 3.8/10 (I know it's picky but that's how I run the show)

[John McClane]

Everything good except, the rating. It should be a 6

[led_zeppelin]

Everything good except, the rating. It should be a 6


I mean 3.8/5 sorry guys

[John McClane]

I mean 3.8/5 sorry guys
O that's better. No problem.

[Mark]

... with a smiley face drew on his naked anus.

Did you know you need a mirror to see Uranus?

I'm used to seeing Bruno Kirby in dramatic parts (Sleepers, Basketball Diaries)...

and his biggest dramatic role, The Godfather Part II

[led_zeppelin]

Moving right along with reviews from the Harry Knowles wannabe

http://www.toutcourt.net/Immagini/Locandine_Kubrick/Large/Shining.jpg

Plot: Jack Torrence (Nicholson) has been hired as the caretaker of the notorious Overlook Hotel, to stay there with his family and-get this-take care of it through the winter. As they arrive Jack's son Danny meets Dick Halloren (forget his name) and finds out that both Danny and Dick have the "Shining", which is where you can talk with your mind and stuff. Telepathy. . .If I MAY. And after Dick leaves, the family is all alone in a hotel not so famous for it's good aspects. With Jack just recovering from a drinking problem, Wendy (Shelly Duvall) his wife is so overprotective it isn't funny. So after the hotel's "residents" find out Danny has the Shining, they start making him see things to try to drive them out. Such as room 217's scary resident and "the twins". . .eesh. So finally, after many many months of being secluded while trying to write his play, Jack flies over the Cookoo's Nest. When Wendy realizes this, she whacks him with a baseball bat and locks him in the freezer. Oh and I forgot to mention Grady, the old caretaker who killed his wife and kids. So Grady lets him out of the freezer and Jack takes and axe trying to kill his family. After he finds Wendy he utters the famous words, "Heeeeeere's JOHNNY!" Although not totally original, I like it better on the Shining than I do on Johnny Carson's show. And from there on it's nothing but tense freaky scenes of elevators full of blood, messed up twins, and a scary Jack Nicholson.

What I liked about it is pretty much everything. Sure it starts off real slow, but that's good for the build up. Just like the Exorcist. But I think the ending of the Shining is cooler than the Exorcist's. Probably the scariest scene in a movie that I can remember but didn't post on that one thread is the twins scene. Sure Room 217 is creepy, but OH MAN those twins get to me TO THIS DAY! So pretty much how well done the suspense and horror is in the movie is my favorite part.

What I didn't like is that it doesn't follow the book that well. That being said it's probably my pic along with the Exorcist for the scariest movie of all time. And then again it said "Stanley Kubrick's" not "Stephen King's" so my argument is kind of void. I also didn't like how Jack Torrence is supposed to be a recovered alcoholic who is perfectly normal, until a bunch of months go by and then he goes crazy because of the hotel. In this movie I get the impression that Nicholson is a little crazy to begin with, which I don't particularly agree with. And my biggest problem with the film is how ANNOYING Shelly Duvall is in the movie. I was rooting for Jack to chop her up in the bathroom. And that's all I have for this review. I don't think I need to recommend it to anybody because I think all who have been reading my reviews have definately seen this movie.

I give it a 4/5

[John McClane]

I haven't seen it for one thing but, I'm going to go buy it. Thanks for the review it's pretty good, I commend you.

[led_zeppelin]

I haven't seen it for one thing but, I'm going to go buy it. Thanks for the review it's pretty good, I commend you.

You haven't seen the Shining? You're right, go and buy it! NOW!

[John McClane]

You haven't seen the Shining? You're right, go and buy it! NOW!
GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR............ Lol.

[Mark]

"All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy."

[Garrett]

"All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy. All work and no play make Jack a dull boy."

Copy, paste, repeat... :p ;)

[bluebottle]

Nice reviews, mate.:)

[James_Bond]

Good Job, Keep em' coming

[led_zeppelin]

I haven't reviewed in a while, because I can't find a decent cover for Kill Bill Vol. 1. So here's another movie that I own and wish to review.

http://suvivor.tnmc.org/posters/8MM.jpg

Plot: Nicholas Cage's character is a private investigator, married and just had a baby named Cinderella. (?) But when a millionare dies, his widow finds an 8mm film in his vault, and plays it. What she sees is a horrific film of a teenage girl being brutally murdered by a man in a black mask. She calls Nichlas Cage to investigate and see if the girl was actually killed or not, because those kinds of films are usually fake. So as Nicholas Cage is investigating he meets Juaquin Pheonix's character, who is very helpful in the ways of underground porno and stuff. This film stars Nicholas Cage, Juaquin Pheonix, James Gandolfini, Peter Stormare (who pretty much plays in everything) and Anthony Heald.

What I like: Well, this film isn't really something you watch for fun. Although I do think this is a well done film, there are some things you should watch out for. First of all, some of the "smut" films are really nasty. Hardcore porno is nothing to watch for kicks, because in these films the guys slash the crap out of the girls, and it's pretty. . .ugh. Lots of nudity, lots of violence and lots of language. Besides the "smut" films nothing is really "hard to watch" but it gets pretty bad. But all that stuff I just said, doen't mean I don't like the movie, I think it's awesome, just some aspects are kind of nasssssssssty. *cracks whip* So I recommend this to people who enjoy movies like Natural Born Killers, Se7en, and stuff like that. Which I do.

I give this movie a 7.3/10 (this gives me more room to rate movies)

[John McClane]

Nice job. Thanks for the review. I've been unable to find time hopeful this weekend I can get a review out.*hint* Maybe Kill Bill Vol.1 *hint*

[led_zeppelin]

Sorry for my absence

http://www.nzvideos.org/lordfellowshipfront.JPG

Plot: Long ago in the second age of Middle Earth, the evil lord Sauron ordered elvin smiths to create 9 rings of power. 3 for the Elven lords, 7 for the dwarven kings, and 9 to the race of men. But when Sauron learned how to create his own rings, he created the most powerful one of all, the ring of (guess what?) POWER! MUAHAHAHAHA! After many years of ruling Middle Earth, the last alliance of men and elves marched against the armies or Mordor, and on the slopes of Mt. Doom, they fought for the freedom of middle earth. (got that line from the movie) After Isildur, the next in line to rule Gondor (the kingdom of men) killed Sauron and took the ring for his own, he was corrupted with evil. Then he was killed by a band of orcs, the ring was lost for a very very long time. Then it fell into the hands of Smeagol, who later was called Gollum. For 90 years Gollum lived at the bottom of a mountain in pitch black, slowly atrophying (sp?) and living abnormally long because of the ring. But then Bilbo Baggins fell into Gollum's cave (for more details read the Hobbit) and took the ring. Ok, now, a long time later, the "powers that be" in Mordor have risen up and are looking for the ring. They come looking for it in the Shire where Bilbo lives, so Gandalf the wizard orders Frodo and his companions to take it to Bree and meet him there. When he doesn't show up they tag along with Strider, a friend of Gandalf's to Rivendell, the Elven haven. Then they decide to destroy the ring in Mt. Doom, and they add 3 more people onto the Fellowhip to accompany them. Frodo, Sam, Merry, Pippin, Aragorn, Boromir, Gimli, Legolas, and Gandalf. So the rest of the movie is the Fellowhip on their way to Mordor to destroy the Ring of Power.

What I liked: Well what's not to like. I've only read the books 4 times so when the movies came out I was in shock. This movie doesn't exactly move as fast as some would like, but WHO CARES!? I mean honestly, it's Lord of the Rings. My favorite scene is definatley the final battle at Amon Hen, mainly because it's a battle, and it was entirely in the book. The movie is packed with action, but mostly dialogue. If you want action you have got to see The Two Towers and Return of the King. This is the backstory movie, which is obvioulsy needed. And it's not like anything thing in the backstory is made up because Tolkien has crafted a world. Yes, it's like it actually happened. He even created all the languages, now that takes time! In my opinion, after these movies were made, Peter Jackson is now, what Stanley Kubrick and Steven Spielberg were in the 70's and 80's. He has created one of the greatest movie trilogies of all time. I recommend this to anybody who has atleast and hour of attention span. Although I'm pretty sure everyone on here has seen the movie.

I give it a 8.7/10

[John McClane]

Nice review. Thanks for it! Nice pick too.

[Garrett]

Great review. :D As you probably know, RotK was my favorite.

[Caitlyn]

Nice reviews LZ... I didn't have time to catch up on all of them but I will... and welcome to the sticky club... :)

[John McClane]

Nice reviews LZ... I didn't have time to catch up on all of them but I will... and welcome to the sticky club... :)
Yes, welcome. You must write more now.

[Colonel Sanders]

Great Review, Fellowship was my favorite of the whole trilogy. (Which, as you know, is saying ALOT.) But I disagree with your rating it was at least a 9.3. Good Review!

[led_zeppelin]

Thank you very much for putting the Important thing, I didn't know how to do it.

http://www.poster.net/lord-of-the-rings-ii/lord-of-the-rings-ii-teaser-two-towers-4900237.jpg

Plot: Well, on the way to Mordor to destroy the ring, the Fellowhip has had many losses. Gandalf fell to the Balrog, Boromir died defending Merry and Pippin who were to be captured by the Uruk-Hai (a special breed of orcs) and Frodo and Sam left together to destroy the ring themselves. So this leaves Aragorn the man, Legolas the elf, and Gimli the dwarf to go and save Merry and Pippin from the evil Uruk-Hai and Saruman the wizard. So they go on a three day journey across the plains of Rohan at a pace not even Lance Armstrong could match. (harharhar) but as they are running on the third day (sounds kind of biblical) they run into the Rohirrim, the soldiers of Rohan. There they meet Eomer, the leader who tells them that they killed the Uruk Hai and burned the bodies. Thinking Merry and Pippin are dead, the trio is very dismayed obviously. Somehow though, Aragorn uses his ranger skills and figures out that Merry and Pippin ran into Fangorn Forest before they could be killed. And he is right of course, but when Merry and Pippin escaped into Fangorn, they met Treebeard, and ent. Ents are walking talking trees, the oldest race in Middle-earth, and Treebeard is the oldest ent. So the hobbits and Treebeard become fast friends. Then there is the trio of heroes trying to find Merry and Pippin, but they run into an unlikely character. Gandalf! Yes he did die, but when he died he was Gandalf the Grey, he came back as Gandalf the White, a much stronger wizard than he once was. Gandalf tells them of his affairs with the Balrog, and also tells them the the hobbits (M and P) are fine. So Gandalf and co. ride to Edoras, the capital of Rohan. There they find Theoden the king under the spell of Grima Wormtongue, a co-worker of Saruman, sent to corrupt the king. Gandalf frees Theoden of the spell, and throws Wormtongue down the steps. hehe Gandalf takes Grima's place as councellor, and helps Theoden to decide to go to Helm's Deep, a defensive fortress to protect his country from the 10,000 oncoming Uruk-Hai soldiers from Isengard.
In the meantime, Frodo and Sam have crossed into Emyn Muil, which is basically a bunch of jagged rocks, only really high off the ground. There they find Gollum, the retched creature long-sense possesed by the ring. He's no bigger around than my. . .well, let's just say he's thin. Gollum ends up following Frodo and Sam's orders after being tied by the neck to lead them to Mordor. Although Frodo believes Gollum can be changed back to good (which he is actually for a time) Sam however does not. So their relationship is a bit rocky. Gollum leads them after many happenings which I won't get into, to the Black Gate of Moror. The Morannon if I may. But when they are about ready to leave, Gollum says there is ANOTHER way into Mordor. So they turn around and go in a new direction. Then now go through Ithilien, which is guarded unbeknownst to the trio by rangers of Gondor. Headed up by Faramir, brother to Boromir who died saving the lives of Merry and Pippin. As Gollum slips away before being captured, sam and Frody however are caught by Faramir and troops. But nothing really happens here so he lets them go, but Gollum has turned evil again so now, the pass which he spoke of before, he now is leading them into a trap.
Now, Merry and Pippin have convinced the ents to join the war, so the ents march off to Isenguard. The Rohirrim at Helm's Deep are waiting for the Uruk Hai to arrive to fight them. And I forgot to mention that Wormtongue had Eomer and his Rohirrim banished so Gandalf is off trying to find Eomer. Well finally the Uruk-Hai arrive at Helm's Deep. 10,000 Uruks vs. 500 Rohan soldiers. But LO! the Elves arrive too so now it's 10,000 vs. like 800. So then follows the Battle of Helm's Deep, where Legolas and Gimli have a challenge to see who kills more Uruks. Meanwhile back at Isengard, the ents break down the walls, kill a bunch of orcs, (with M and P on Treebeard's back the whole time) and they flood the entire area of Isengard! It's awesome. So Saruman is taken care of, but at Helm's Deep, the Uruks are winning. Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli, along with Theoden and many other Rohirrim are backed into a room waiting for the Uruks to charge through. On the dawn of the 2nd day I think, the Rohirrim charge out into the huge army of Uruks for one last ride, but as they are charging out, who shows up but Gandalf and Eomer, with 2,000 of his Rohirrim to save the day. So Saruman is totally vanquished, but now they all must go to Gondor to try and get the Gondorian soldiers to help thing in the War of the Ring.

I give this movie a 7.8/10

[John McClane]

Your doing all the films aren't you? Keep up the good work and thanks for the review.

[Revenant]

This review is more of a step by step guide to the movie and should come with plot spoiler warnings.


Thank you very much for putting the Important thing, I didn't know how to do it.

Important links are down to moderator discretion.

I'm being really picky today. :)

[blibblobblib]

http://suvivor.tnmc.org/posters/8MM.jpg

Urgh. I watched this film for the first time about 2 weeks ago and it really freaked me out. I was under the influence of a certain greenous herb but it really scared me. I had to walk home afterwards and i just had mega creeps. very gory, gruesome and not very nice film.

however, very good review so congrats!

[led_zeppelin]

This review is more of a step by step guide to the movie and should come with plot spoiler warnings.

Well excuse me for breathing Mr./Mrs. perfect!

P.S. I'm just kidding.

[led_zeppelin]

AH CRAP! I wrote down the wrong rating for the Two Towers! Give it an 8.8/10, not 7.8/10. Sorry, that's the second review I've botched.

[Revenant]

Well excuse me for breathing Mr./Mrs. perfect!

P.S. I'm just kidding.
:p

I've been very picky today, in fact right now I'm picking my ..............

Never mind. :D

[led_zeppelin]

Sorry for my botched rating for the Two Towers.

http://www.impawards.com/2003/posters/lord_of_the_rings_the_return_of_the_king_ver7.jpg

Plot: Frodo, Sam and Gollum have passed into Mordor. Sam is getting the impression that Gollum is up to no good, but of course Frodo doesn't believe him so this causes a dramtic tension only too common in movies of this sort. Meanwhile, Gandalf and co. ride down to post-flooded Isengard to find Treebeard (plus the other ents) and the two long lost hobbits, smoking. After pretty much saying Saruman is worthless in one sentence (there was supposed to be a cut scene where Saruman dies). After talking about Saruman for a bit, Pippin finds a glowing orb called a Palantir, a seeing stone if I may. But when Gandalf sees it, knowing what damage it could do to Pippin, takes it for himself. So they all ride back to Edoras, to celebrate. Might I add that Merry and Pippin got a good song in there. But as they all go to sleep, Pippin, being the nosy hunk a' poo gets it in his head to steal the Palantir back and see what it does. Well, he f's up. As he looks into it, Sauron, the lord of the rings catches Pippin, and takes over his mind for a short period of time. Well Gandalf wakes up and saves him. But when Sauron looked at Pippin through the Palantir, Pippin saw that Sauron was going for Minas Tirith. So Gandalf goes off to ride to Minas Tirith, but he takes Pippin with him. Meanwhile, Aragorn, Legolas, Gimli, Merry, Theoden and so forth stay at Edoras. Gandalf and Pippin arrive at Minas Tirith, they go up to talk to Lord Denethor, Steward of Gondor (which is one less than a king, Gondor hasn't had a king of a long time, and Aragorn is next in line). Gandalf tries to get Denethor to talk, but Denethor has recieved Bormir (his oldest son) horn that was cut in two when he was killed at Amon Hen. Faramir, his youngest sone is off at Osgiliath defending it. But when Osgiliath is overthrown by the oncoming foes sent from Minas Morgul, Faramir returns. Back to Frodo. Him, Sam and Gollum have reached Minas Morgul, home of the Nazgul. On the mountain beside Minas Morgul is the Hidden Stair, which they must get up to get into the tunnel Gollum spoke of before. Just as they are climbing the stair, a huge green pillar of light comes from the city, and the army of Minas Morgul comes out, led by the Witch King, lord of the Nazgul, Sauron's second in command. Finally Frodo etc. get halfway up and rest on a little cliff. After a VERY heated argument, Frodo tells Sam to go home. Sam follows his master's orders and stays behind. Meanwhile the army of Minas Morgul has invaded Osgiliath. Faramir goes to his father for council, but just after Pippin gets put into the Gondorian army, Denethor tells his only living son to go and try to take back Osgiliath, pretty much signing his death warrant because 400 vs. 100,000 aren't good odds. But Faramir follows his father'r orders and takes a squadron out to TRY and definately fail to take back Osgiliath. Well it fails and they all die except for faramir, who is mortally wounded and dragged back to Minas Tirith by his horse. Denethor thinks he is dead and orders his guard to put up a pyre to burn him and his son alive like the kings of old. So back to Frodo again. Frodo and Gollum arrive at the tunnel. As they walk in, it's totally dark, there are spiderwebs everywhere, and Gollum turns up missing. Finally Frodo is confronted with the monster. I giant spider named Shelob. Frodo runs from the spider and makes it out alive. But Gollum turns up again to get the ring once and for all from Frodo, but Frodo flings him over a cliff. The trouble however is not over. Shelob hits Frodo with her stinger and wraps him up, but just as she is about to eat him, Sam comes back and has a wicked awesome fight with Shelob and kicks it's butt. Although Sam thinks Frodo is dead, so he takes the ring. But when orcs show up and say that he isn't dead, capture him and take him back to their fortress Cirith Ungol, Sam follows. Back at Minas Tirith, after the full force of 100,000 orcs arrive to attack Minas Tirith, Denethor goes nuts but Gandalf quickly beats the crap out of him, and takes over. He orders that they defend as long as possible. They light the war beacons and when Theoden sees them and realizes that Minas Tirith needs help, he gathers 6,000 Rohirrim to charge and save Minas Tirith. Only Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli go off on their own to bring the army of the dead to help. Only the king of Gondor can wake them up, and Aragorn is the rightful king, so he awakens them, and they go off to try to take over the Black Ships and use them. Well Sam found his way to Cirith ungol, and he does a good job of killing some orcs, but the rest are fighting each other over Frodo's stuff. Well Sam haughtily takes care of them and him and Frodo garn (?) some orc armor and head off to Mount Doom. After a while it gets too heavy so they go back to normal clothes. Back at Minas Tirith, the orcs have proceeded to throw the heads of the Gondorian's they've killed over the walls, and are now catapulting big rocks at the citadel. Gondor promptly catapulted back at them, only they are using debree of their own city. [SPOILERS]Up in the city, Denethor has put Faramir and himself on the pyre, and just as they catch it on fire, Gandalf comes in and makes Denethor realize his son is still alive. So he commits suicide by jumping off the top of the citadel (my least fav. part because his death in the books is better) [SPOILER over] So Faramir is saved, but the battle isn't go well for Minas Tirith. But just when you think it couldn't get worse, it gets better. Rohan arrives, with Merry riding with them into battle. After a very awesome speech from my favorite character Theoden, they charge (my favorite part of the movie) into the huge army of orcs. Now the Rohirrim are kickin some major butt, but then (haha, two butts in a row, haha) the Oliphaunts come. Oliphaunts are elephants, only they are three times the size of a normal elephant, and they have two HUGE tusks. One even has a spiked chain tied between it's tusks. The Rohirrim reform, and they take down lots of the Oliphaunts. [MAJOR SPOILER]The Witch-King comes back on his winged beast and pretty much kills Theoden. But Eowyn, his niece rides up with Merry and challenges it. Well Merry is off the horse. So Eowyin kills the winged beast, and her and the Witch king fight. Just when it's about to kill her, Merry stabs it in the back and then Eowyn stabs it in the face, and it implodes.[SPOILER OVER] So then after many deaths, Aragorn, Legolas and Gimli come with the dead army and clean house. So the Battle of Pelennor Fields is over. Back at Mt. Doom, Frodo is about to pass out climbing up the volcano to throw it in. When they almost get to the top, Gollum comes back with a vengence, but Sam stabs him and wounds him. Frodo runs into the depths of the mountain and Sam tries to follow. When he gets there Frodo has taken the ring for himself, and Gollum is behind him ready to take back the ring. In the meantime of all this commotion, the remaing good guys go outside the Black Gate to make a last stand to give Frodo more time to destroy the ring. Will Frodo destroy it or take it for himself, and will our heroes survive the war of the ring? To find out, watch the movie.

I give this movie a 9.0/10

[led_zeppelin]

Seeing as how you all loved my ROTK review. . .herherher

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Plot: 4 boarding school buddies, Avery (Henry Thomas) Brett (Jay Mohr) Max (Sean Patrick Flannery) and T.K. (Jeremy Sisto) hatch a plan to kidnap infamous mobster Charlie Batrolucci (Christopher Walken) to get him to call his "people" to get two OTHER mobsters (Brad Garrett and fat moncho from Sleepers) to release Avery's sister. AKA max's girlfriend. When they kidnap Charlie, they tie him to a big leather amrchair and cut off one of his fingers. The reason they do this is because whatever the mobsters do to Avery's sister, the guys do to Charlie. But the house they are keeping him in belongs to Ira (Johnny Galecki) their other friend who is a major clean-freak idiot. On the other side of the field there is Lono (Dennis Leary) who is Charlie's "assistant" and whenever Charlie calls his lawyer to get info on the kidnappers, the lawyer calls Lono. The whole movie Lono is basically comic-relief when his buddy he is driving keeps making fun of his brand new stingray boots. After a few hours, they all become friends with Charlie, especially Ira, who Charlie calls "the man." When they figure out there is a inside player in the crime, Lono shows up, but when they think they've caught the inside player, there is actually another trick going on. But don't worry, Charlie feels sorry for the tricked friends so him and Lono "take care" of it. If that doesn't make any sense, sorry but you have to watch the movie.

What I liked: I liked everything. The cast is superb, nothing wrong with the cast at all. Dennis Leary and Johnny Galecki give stand-out performances. The movie doesn't have a big budget, but it doesn't really need one. There really isn't any problem with anything in this movie, I mean it's no 10/10 but there is no obvious things I'd like to change if I was the director. Henceforth. . .

I give this movie a 8.5/10

[Garrett]

I haven't gotten around to seeing this yet, it's now on my must see list. :up:

[Lola]

You're reviews are great, and I shouldn't be allowed to critique. But maybe you should think about dividing your reviews up more. You've done it on some of them. I just know that I personally don't want to read things if they're all in one block.

[nebbit]

Great reviews Zeppie :D I have finally read them all, I am working my way down the page of reviewers, nearly finished. http://pages.prodigy.net/indianahawkeye/newpage14/6.gif