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The Spy Next Door 2010
It makes me feel old knowing movies from 2005 are already being remade. In this case, the remake doesn't even come close to standing up to the original (The Pacifier with Vin Diesel). It only works as a epic motion picture failure.
Jackie Chan plays Bob Ho, a CIA agent who has just caught his last bad guy (and it only takes him about 3 minutes). He's retiring now and looking to settle down with widower Gillian Something (played by Amber something). Although she doesn't think her kids are (this is a quote) "ever going to like him", so she wants to take the relationship much slower than lightning fast Chan.
Chan being the impatient man he is, offers to babysit the kids while she goes out of town for a week. His perfect opportunity ! But, one of the kids downloads a secret bad guy file from Chan's comp and then the bad guy breaks out of a prison van (off screen). So with the bad guy now reunited with his 10 man team, he somehow finds that the kid downloaded the file and for some reason that threatens his evil scheme (which is to evaporate the world's supply of oil, except for Russia .... with 10 guys that get beat up by kids).
There's no creativity here, Chan doesn't even do a couple funny things with the kids. It's got less production values than a Disney television series. This is a straight, make the money and run deal. Someone at Liongate realized movies like The Pacifier and Kindergarten Cop always do well commercially, so they penned up a screenplay in a couple hours and filmed it the next day. All in all three days of work.
It makes me feel old knowing movies from 2005 are already being remade. In this case, the remake doesn't even come close to standing up to the original (The Pacifier with Vin Diesel). It only works as a epic motion picture failure.
Jackie Chan plays Bob Ho, a CIA agent who has just caught his last bad guy (and it only takes him about 3 minutes). He's retiring now and looking to settle down with widower Gillian Something (played by Amber something). Although she doesn't think her kids are (this is a quote) "ever going to like him", so she wants to take the relationship much slower than lightning fast Chan.
Chan being the impatient man he is, offers to babysit the kids while she goes out of town for a week. His perfect opportunity ! But, one of the kids downloads a secret bad guy file from Chan's comp and then the bad guy breaks out of a prison van (off screen). So with the bad guy now reunited with his 10 man team, he somehow finds that the kid downloaded the file and for some reason that threatens his evil scheme (which is to evaporate the world's supply of oil, except for Russia .... with 10 guys that get beat up by kids).
There's no creativity here, Chan doesn't even do a couple funny things with the kids. It's got less production values than a Disney television series. This is a straight, make the money and run deal. Someone at Liongate realized movies like The Pacifier and Kindergarten Cop always do well commercially, so they penned up a screenplay in a couple hours and filmed it the next day. All in all three days of work.