Criterion Fantasies


The most loathsome of all goblins
I would love to see them do Bringing Up Baby. They've already done a few Howard Hawks movie, strange that they haven't gotten around to his magnum opus

"Money won is twice as sweet as money earned."

I believe that Criterion has yet to release the most fitting film for their entire catalog. And this film is...

A man's got to know his limitations.

Besides bragging that I would be better than any superhero with this power, I would release the following top ten on criterion:

10.) Street Trash (1987)
9.) Witchfinder General (1968)
8.) Kiss of Death (1947)
7.) Sorcerer (1977)
6.) Zodiac (2007)
5.) The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford (2007)
4.) Mean Streets (1973)
3.) The Parallax View (1974)
2.) The Roaring Twenties (1939)
1.) Underworld USA (1961)

Universal put out a ragged master with bad bake lines, halos and a smudgy wax job.

Criterion should do this one, forget their usual aesthetic. This one needs saving and super supplements as a market apology.

BLU RAY features would include;

-Brand new 4k remaster with state of the art color correction
-Suede outer slipcover jacket with newly commissioned artwork by Drew Struzan
-90 page collectible booklet written by John Kapelos and Nancy Ludwig
-Audio Commentary with Roger Ebert (recorded in 1995, recovered from the vaults)
-Audio commentary with Anthony Michael Hall, Ilan Mitchell-Smith and Kelly LeBrock
-Deleted scenes (41 mins)
-Collectible 18x24 original theatrical artwork poster signed by Robert Downey, Jr.
-Bloopers and outtakes (16 mins)
-"Black and Blonde: The Girls of Weird Science" - An all new 36 min interview with cast members Suzanne Synder and Judie Aronson
-"SCIENCE!" All new behind the scenes look at the extensive remastering/color correction process for the Weird Science blu ray!
-"Where the Boys are '17" - Feature length documentary on the making of Weird Science featuring brand new interviews with Anthony Michael Hall, Ilan Mitchell-Smith, Kelly LeBrock, Bill Paxton and more!
-"From the Archives" - 55 min interview with John Hughes (presented by Nancy Ludwig, from her personal vaults. Never aired.Originally recorded for 60 Minutes)
-isolated music score
Audio Commentary with composer Ira Newborn, featuring Oingo Boingo singer Danny Elfman
-Weird Science Holographic Lenticular Collector's 8x10 featuring newly commissioned artwork by H.R. Giger (from the original drawings not used)
-Subtitles for the hearing impaired
-new 5.1, 7.1 and 2.0 uncompressed original stereo and mono audio
-Original Theatrical Trailer, TV Spots, Teaser Promo
-"Evil Older Brothers" - Vintage Q&A with Bill Paxton from the Houston,Texas "Comic-Con 2006"
-pressed on a 50gb BD with an average bitrate of 45mbps

And much, much more!

Suggested retail price $39.99

Cover coming soon.

I think it's high time Criterion released two of their old catalogue titles...

Michael Bay's The Rock

And the unsurpassed masterpiece...

Michael Bay's Armaggedon.

There was some talk about California Split also getting a release soon (this was a few months ago), but nothing official yet. I hope it happens!

Another one I'd like to see released is Bogdanovich's Saint Jack.
Cobpyth's Movie Log ~ 2019

One of my Albert Brooks wishes is coming in July, too! Hope this is the first of his entire filmography.
"Film is a disease. When it infects your bloodstream it takes over as the number one hormone. It bosses the enzymes, directs the pineal gland, plays Iago to your psyche. As with heroin, the antidote to Film is more Film." - Frank Capra

Any good criterion collections that are on region 1 that aren't on region 2, that would be a blessing.

I also wouldn't mind a Blu-Ray criterion for Funny Games.

Perhaps if I could get easy access to all Criterion collection because on it is like 39 pages and it is hard to ctrlF. then i would have to do pretty laborious crosscheck. However for now i would suggest
Cremator (1969) and
The Ear (1970)
You can call it the art of fighting without fighting.

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All the John Hughes movies and all of the John Sayles movies as box sets.

What happened? Quite a mess, huh?
They should do a release of Poltergeist decked out with extras since no one else will.
Look, Dr. Lesh, we don't care about the disturbances, the pounding and the flashing, the screaming, the music. We just want you to find our little girl.