Originally Posted by Yoda
Wow. I didn't even remotely see that coming. Sorry to hear it, Mary. Speaking from experience, if this had to happen, better for it to happen when Selena's a bit younger. There's a certain age (early to pre-teen, I'd say) where a divorce can be exponenatially more harmful.
Yeah, it was a shock for pretty much everyone we knew. Troy and I had been dealing with it, just the two of us, since January, but we'd managed to keep it from becoming public knowledge. Which was incredible, considering how miserable we both were.
But
that is a long damn story that I'm not going to post in a thread. Things are better now, for both of us, even if they aren't perfect as of yet. And the right decision has been made. I'm confident of that.
And I agree with you on the age thing. It's harder to believe that you had nothing to do with the situation when you're older, I think--partly because, when you're a teenager, you're pretty sure everything revolved around you. But Troy and I have both been vigilant about making sure Selena knows a) she is loved, and b) we will always be there for her. It helps that we're still friends, as much as we can be--although that's messy, too.
Yes, sad to hear of your situation, but I'm confident that a strong, caring person like yourself won't let fear obstruct your judgment anymore--well, maybe not for as long. I could be speaking of things I know nothing about, but it is sure nice to see you back Mary!
Thanks, Tim. And, you know, that's kind of it. It hurt so bad when I realized that we couldn't make it work, and when I realized my first love was over, but I couldn't be who I was with him--because who I was made him unhappy, and I wanted him to be happy, so I did all the compromising. But--and I'm done (mostly) feeling guilty about this--now I'm starting to be happy again, in a whole different way.
Cripes, I'm sorry. I've talked about this so much, with so many people, over the past month or two, that I immediately go into "ramble-mode" whenever I talk about it.
Yes, it's hard, and painful. But it's going to be good for all three of us, ultimately. So I'm going to stop blabbing about it.
Please come around more often....
That's the plan, Stan.