!!!Ninjas!!!

Tools    





there's a frog in my snake oil
I've decided Mofo needs a cohort of ninjas to defend it from peril. Here are some contenders...

---

Duel to the Death

This film ain't perfect, but anything that starts with ninjas silently entering a library and speed-reading scrolls, via athletic rolls, has gotta be a winner ...

&start=9

Don't dally there too long tho... move on to their other sneaky skills...

Kites...

&start=7

Elephantism (& edited feminism)...

&start=36

Half man, half tree...

&start=135

---

The Postman Strikes Back

Or perhaps you prefer your ninjas as loathsome lone wolves? Well this tragic (& fairly turgid) flick can provide...



I seem to remember he could tunnel underground too. But I could equally have hallucinated Costner in a bit part by that point.

---

Ninja Terminator

What got me thinking of this? Why this cobbled-together film, with its Benny Hill qualities. I particularly like the 'man with the tiny golden arm' shot in the trailer here...

&start=63

---

Your turn! Which other ninjas might be up to the task?
__________________
Virtual Reality chatter on a movie site? Got endless amounts of it here. Reviews over here



The Super Ninja



"Against a background of drug smuggling, romance steals a tender moment."

On a scale of 1 to 10 for comical dubbing, with What's Up, Tiger Lily? scoring a 7, I give this a 9. The inneptitude of the trailer is pretty great too.



there's a frog in my snake oil
Was the tender moment the gun barrel in the mouth??

Ninjasploitation, gold outfits, purple explosions? Bannister kills? A final fight that seemed to get sand in the camera? A man detached from his own voice? Oh yes, these guys could guard the portals of Mofo alright





The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are my personal bodyguards while I'm at MoFo. They have saved me from many aggressive single women who've attacked me after taking the "I Love You" thread very seriously.



there's a frog in my snake oil
There should be more ninjas named after Renaissance artists. Or more Renaissance artists with ninja skills. I can't decide which



Yay Ninja Turtles
Ok offically best ninja's ever in my eyes, I want another turtle movie though



"Live forever or die trying"
I'd try an mix Renaissance artists with ninjas. Turn it into some sort of medieval special ops lol.
__________________
Trailers and Reviews



I prefer old 1960s Japanese samurai and ninja movies. Go old school.



there's a frog in my snake oil
Hows about some real life ninjas?

&start=112

&start=123

They'll eat your brains with chopsticks. And laugh while they're at it. The weirdos

More recreations and canny tricks
(embedding disabled damn em)

All from the punch-drunk-packaged, but genuinely informative, martial arts travelogue programme Mind, Body & Kick Ass Moves.



Keep on Rockin in the Free World
Michael Dudikoff approves of this thread.
__________________
"The greatest danger for most of us is not that our aim is too high and we miss it, but that it is too low and we reach it." - Michelangelo.



All good people are asleep and dreaming.
Patrick Smith isn't impressed with this thread.



there's a frog in my snake oil
Since this thread was started someone has subtly invented the gif. In recognition of that event... BUMP:




"Honor is not in the Weapon. It is in the Man"
WARNING! Do not hire any of these Ninja actors!

Funny enough, the ninja at 0:49 is an actual stuntman. He is Mark Hicks. He was best known as Chris Tucker's stunt double in the Rush Hour films LOL...the spin kick ninja was a riot...what are gonna do break an ankle with those kicks?
__________________
It's All About the Movies
http://www.worldfilmgeek.com