No plebeians allowed! - Mr Minio's honest music thread

You give me no other choice!



My rating system:

- only the most refined and metaphysical stuff to be found here! Even most of my favourite artists never made it! This is the world of impossible, invicible and my bad sense of humour.
- a masterpiece of music. The infinite.
- an incredibly good album! A masterpiece, or highly enjoyable for me personally, or both.
- pretty good! This is some good stuff! It's by no means a masterwork, but a highly recommended piece of music anyway.
- yeah, it's okay, I guess... It's still better than worse, but something just doesn't click for me. A slight disappointment.
- pretty mediocre! I'm indifferent to this stuff! It may even be pretty boring, or bad musically, but if I don't mind it playing in the background, it probably would get this rating.
- bad! It doesn't even work as background music, because it's pretty annoying, or simply put sh*tty!
- crap! If an album gets a rating like this from me, it's either a huge disappointment from a band I like, or a total turd!
- Words can't express how bad this stuff is! It's so bad it makes Hitler good!
- minus infinity. To make music so bad you actually need a bigger skill (or lack of thereof) than to make a masterpiece. Depths of hell await for all 0.5 rated albums (and the artists/bands who created them).


Alright, so I've rated 2,499 albums on RYM so far (listened to a tad bit more than that, but at one point I deleted all my ratings and didn't rerate everything) and decided that my 2,500 rating has to be something well known I haven't listened to yet. No matter if I like it, or not. So yeah, Metallica was an obvious choice. It's a band loved by high school kids trying to be trv and metal and rebellious and stuff (I guess Slipknot has taken the lead now, but still...), but also by refined music critics and of course it's very popular and the opinions are divided, so I need to make my own. Back in a day when I was into modern metal I thought Metallica was dull and boring and I never managed to sit through any full-length album. I played some of their songs on guitar, but mainly because I didn't have any idea what else to play and because Enter Sandman and Nirvana's Smells Like Teen Spirit was giving orgasms to one girl from my school, so me and two other guitarists kept playing it over and over and she was like: "OH MY GOD! THIS IS SO AWESOME! OMG!" and she was almost crying and probably wet down there. Whatever. I'm of course exaggerating it.

Anyways, since I'm going to listen to Metallica I decided their debut album would be a perfect pick. Some trv and kvlt thrash metal maniacs claim that Metallica has ended with Kill 'Em All, so we have a very nice (actually a terrible) start here. Without further ado, let's get to it!



Two first songs were pretty boring and uninspiring. Your typical thrash metal with some solos put there just because. Motorbreath brings a change to vocals that no longer sound lame and become quite enjoyable. Sadly, some guitar solos kick in. It's not that they are terrible, but they don't really fit in there in my point of view. They destroy the nice atmosphere created so far in the song. Next song and again the vocals are nothing to fap to. I don't like the echoing effect they have there. It sounds as if the vocalist had his head in a vacuum when singing. WTF is wrong with (Anasthesia) Pulling Teeth? Only guitar playing? Lame. Okay, now other instruments kicked in. Whatever. I kinda like the riff of Phantom Lord. They have to kick in with these solos, don't they? Meh. Ah, yes, a couple of mehs later and we get the well known Seek and Destroy. The intro riff is alright. And the vocalist even says 'alright' as if he agreed his music is only alright and nothing more. It's weak! Wow, kinda dull, too, but listenable as background music. Metal Mili CHAU! And some marching at the end. I almost thought the album already ended and some neo folk popped up next. Blah.

Summing up:

Best song: Motorbreath
Worst song: Everything else!
Feels: None! It's listenable and I wasn't struggling to finish it, though!
Trivia: There's a version of this album with two other songs. These are covers, but no way in hell I'll be listening this. Moreover, people say this album is one giant rip off, but so are Led Zeppelin albums. At least Led Zeppelin's music is good.

Rating:

I feel like giving a strong to weak for this thing.


I will be listening to Nirvana's albums pretty soon, too. I may even decide to relisten most of my albums and be harsher with the ratings this time.

Great, now I have to listen to something else, because I can't go to bed like this. Too bad Metallica, you're getting a 2 star rating from me for your first album. Hopefully their next albums are better!

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Hmm so I guess that means I cant say anything in your thread! Im not much of a Metallica fan. :P

Any Metallica album is worth more than that rating!

Perhaps their next albums will get a higher rating. I used to listen to a lot of Master of the Puppets songs and I liked them back in the time. No idea how I'd react to them now, though.

Searching.........Seek and Destroy!

Excited for this. I find that I don't really care about the popularity of an artist, I just like music. The problem is I'm so overexposed to the popular stuff and haven't listened to nearly enough obscure stuff that might be good. Which is why I have you, Minio.

I rate Kill 'Em All . I can understand not loving it - it's my least favorite of their first three albums (the only ones I care about), but it's still good to me. I do absolutely love "Seek and Destroy".

Ride the Lightning and Master of Puppets are great but I'm not sure I absolutely love them like masterpieces anymore, as I hear more metal. Maybe it's because I've burned myself out listening to them, or because I've discovered better stuff, but lately I haven't found myself in the mood to listen to them, even when I go to put on metal (which is pretty much all the time now).

St. Anger is BY FAR the weakest Metallica album even if I like it a lot...

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''Haters are my favourite. I've built an empire with the bricks they've thrown at me... Keep On Hating''
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Well, I personally appreciated them more the more metal I listened. Metallica are really talented and they were able to make very memorable thrash metal, which is a hard task. Although there are many thrash albums I prefer now over any Metallica album.

Kill en All is an excellent album that exemplifies proto-thrash metal (it's not quite pure thrash yet, still very close to NWBHM) though I prefer Slayer's Show no Mercy among 1983 proto-thrash albums.

I just hope Minio doesn't decide to listen (and predictably trash) to Iron Maiden, Slayer, Helloween, Ensiferum, Black Sabbath, Virgin Steele, Kreator or Judas Priest now.

Maybe you should review something considered bad like Jugulator:

Guap - I didn't mean to trash Metallica or anything, I may have been wrong about my reasons. I think it's more that I just got burnt out on them. Remember, Metallica was the first metal I really got into at a young age. It's only natural that I'll get burnt out on them and, as I discover more metal, might turn towards that stuff.

Metallica were untouchable for me as a kid. Nothing could top Master of Puppets, and it was never a question. Now it's a question. As much as I love that album, it's not the flawless masterpiece I once saw it as. It's just a fantastic metal album. So only a minor step down.

I do 100% agree with you about their talents in composing memorable thrash metal riffs and melodies. That is, as you say, an incredibly hard task, but Metallica in their prime excelled at that.

You give me no other choice!

Funny, we agree again. I didn't like Reign of Blood at first but it has since grown on me.

That's because all great minds are alike. I will be listening to next Metallica album in the night today!

I watched 7 films today and I don't feel like writing anything more than the rating for Ride the Lightning.

Much better than the previous one. If Metallica keeps getting better, Master of the Puppets should be a 3 star album.

I gave Slayer's album 3 stars. Trying to be stricter with my ratings now!

What are your thoughts on Pig Destroyer, Sir Minio?

It's kind of funny that you say no plebs allowed and then the first two albums you rate are as entry level as can be. I'm not complaining though. I'm glad you made a music thread, and I like the way you've done your reviews so far. I don't care for Metallica or Slayer, but I enjoyed the way you talked about them. I hope you get to some really whacked out crazy music soon. :3

I will also review some obscure weird stuff, but so far I feel like it's a funny juxtaposition between the material being reviewed and thread's premise. Also, I wouldn't call those write-ups reviews just as my Movie Tab II write-ups are not reviews.

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