The 2nd MoFo Hall of Infamy : Son of Infamy

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I'm sensing the Hall of Infamy is a Hall that heaps and heaps of people want to watch but not so many want to join.
I think this is a really fun idea. I just need a break from Halls for the time being.
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To Rock & Speling: You ain't bumpin' me from those 50 yd seats!
Don’t worry. I got us the best seats in the house.



I'm sensing the Hall of Infamy is a Hall that heaps and heaps of people want to watch but not so many want to join.
Speaking for myself, I don’t really join the Halls due to the effort involved, but the kinds of films and genial atmosphere in the last one made it fun to follow along.



I told PHOENIX74 about one of the worst films I have watched but sure in the heck not watching anyone else's. You want to nominate a film, anyone can have mine. 2.5 on Imdb. Never been rated on RT and I think Letterboxd is same rating on IMDB.



I forgot the opening line.
I will just ask, @TheUsualSuspect @Allaby @KeyserCorleone and @Takoma11 - how do you all feel about having the ability to nominate 2 films for this Hall of Fame? I'd be very kind with the deadline.
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Remember - everything has an ending except hope, and sausages - they have two.
We miss you Takoma

Latest Review : Le Circle Rouge (1970)



I will just ask, @TheUsualSuspect @Allaby @KeyserCorleone and @Takoma11 - how do you all feel about having the ability to nominate 2 films for this Hall of Fame? I'd be very kind with the deadline.
I would be cool with that.



I will just ask, @TheUsualSuspect @Allaby @KeyserCorleone and @Takoma11 - how do you all feel about having the ability to nominate 2 films for this Hall of Fame? I'd be very kind with the deadline.
You mean if there's a relatively low turnout for this round?

I'd prefer not to have to watch more than about 10 films for this Hall.



I forgot the opening line.
You mean if there's a relatively low turnout for this round?

I'd prefer not to have to watch more than about 10 films for this Hall.
Yeah, if the turnout doesn't reach the magical '6' - but it wouldn't be a compulsory 'you have to nominate 2' rule. Just to beef the number of films from 5 to, say, 6, 7, 8 or 9.



I will just ask, @TheUsualSuspect @Allaby @KeyserCorleone and @Takoma11 - how do you all feel about having the ability to nominate 2 films for this Hall of Fame? I'd be very kind with the deadline.
Sounds like an interesting turn of events. In that case, I've already got a couple options.



Sounds like an interesting turn of events. In that case, I've already got a couple options.
Say no people. Wait for the unholy six to come together.



I will just ask, @TheUsualSuspect @Allaby @KeyserCorleone and @Takoma11 - how do you all feel about having the ability to nominate 2 films for this Hall of Fame? I'd be very kind with the deadline.
Just wait the evil will coalesce given time.



I forgot the opening line.
Okay - here's the drill for this Hall of Infamy. In another 48 hours I'll reveal the nominations so far.

People will have 7 days to join from that day forward.

If the number of people joining doesn't get to 6, then on the 6th day I'll throw open the doors for 2nd nominations.



Okay - here's the drill for this Hall of Infamy. In another 48 hours I'll reveal the nominations so far.

People will have 7 days to join from that day forward.

If the number of people joining doesn't get to 6, then on the 6th day I'll throw open the doors for 2nd nominations.
I object!!!

No, not really...I'm cool with that.



I forgot the opening line.
THE NOMINATIONS
(Here, and on the first post)

Please Note : I'm now accepting second nominations, which will be revealed when the deadline for joining reaches us. If we meet our quota, then these second nominations won't be included.


Bane (2008) - Nominated by Takoma11


Airplane Mode (2019) - Nominated by TheUsualSuspect


Candy (1968) - Nominated by Allaby


Titanic: The Legend Goes On... (2000) - Nominated by KeyserCorleone
(Titanic - La leggenda continua) - Not to be confused with Legend of the Titanic (La leggenda del Titanic) - (1999)


A Talking Cat!?! (2013) - Nominated by PHOENIX74

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Candy, 1968

Yes, yes, give me some more you blue-eyed b*tch!

Candy (Ewa Aulin) is a high school girl who is lusted after by every man over the age of 30 who lays eyes on her. After being assaulted by the family gardener (Ringo), Candy's father (John Astin) takes her to New York to start over. But at every turn Candy finds herself in the sights of a different man.

It's hard to rate a movie like this, where what works on purpose and what is just a fascinating trainwreck starts to blur together. At the very least I can say that I was never bored.

As I see it, this film has two things going for it. The first is a weirdness that seems to actually work at times. At one point a radical man with a hunchback climbs the walls to escape the clutches of the police. At another point, a doctor (James Coburn) performs surgery on Candy's father, producing grindhouse levels of blood splatter.

The other thing that I appreciated about the film was that part of the humor came from how ridiculous the men were and how pathetic it was that they were using their power to sexually abuse and coerce Candy. Whether it's Richard Burton as a poet who always inexplicably has hair and clothing fluttering in the wind forcing himself on Candy in his car, an aspiring filmmaker cornering Candy in a bathroom, Walter Matthau as an army general who expects Candy's sexual service in exchange for saving her father's life, or Marlon Brando as a "guru" who exploits Candy in the name of enlightenment, the way that all of these men are drawn to Candy's innocence and inexperience seems like a decent commentary on the inherent insecurity that underlies a lot of the virgin girl fantasy. One of my favorite moments actually doesn't involve Candy at all---it's the source of the quote at the top of this review. Two police officers go into a gay club and begin beating up several men who are either transgender or in drag. One of them kisses one of the officers, and the officer responds with anger, hitting the person with his baton. "You want more?" he asks, and his victim preens on the stairs, delivering the line at the top. It's a moment where the violent use of authority is turned back on its perpetrator, and the film could have used more of it. There's an almost subtle joke about the fact that Candy herself is always blamed for her sexual encounters that's a bit too real for the ultimate direction that the film takes.

The problems with this film are two fold. The first is that it contains a lot of racist, homophobic, sexist sentiments without the distinction of whether or not the characters have those view or the film does. Ringo playing a Mexican gardener--who shouts "Viva Zapata!" as he assaults Candy--is just the tip of the iceberg.

But the real problem with the film is Candy herself. I have nothing bad to say about Aulin's performance. She brings a guileless delivery and aura to Candy that actually becomes a bit funnier as the film goes on. (Around the third time she acts surprised by a man wanting to have sex with her it feels like a joke, something that isn't true the first time). Candy is actually quite likable in her own way. She just wants people to be happy, and sees no reason why she shouldn't offer them her body or sex if that's what they need.

But this means that Candy doesn't grow as a character at all. Her sweetness is very flat and one-note, something that is a problem with the writing, not the performance. Candy reacts with the same degree of passion whether someone's buying her a Coke or operating on her father's brain. It also blurs the lines of consent in the film in a way that is uncomfortable to watch. Candy is constantly cornered or coerced, and then her reaction is kind of a shrug. Obviously this movie wouldn't be fun if she were distressed by these various assaults, but at the same time she doesn't seem to derive much pleasure from her encounters. By not developing her character, the movie ends up objectifying her just as much as the pathetic middle-aged men who lust after her. There's an unpleasant sense that a bunch of A-listers just signed on to grope an actual teenager (Aulin would have been 16 or 17 at the time of filming). A rumor that Brando actually tried to have sex with Aulin adds a nauseating dynamic to this.

So visually interesting, but conceptually very problematic in a lot of ways.




Just gonna get my nom out of the way.


Titanic: The Legend Goes On

OK, there are two versions of this movie. One is a 90 minute version I can only find online as a riff (some YT channel that specifically riffs bad musicals). The other is a 75 minute edit. I know what you're thinking: go for the 75 minute version to get the pain out of the way more quickly, right?


EEEEEEEH nerp. Truth is, I recommend the 90 minute version, because the movie is so packed with horrific DIsney-knockoff subplots that it's not even funny unless you riff it, and the horror of the 75 minute version is that the edit does NOTHING to relive the movie of subplots, which means it's more quickly paced and confusing, and the worst part? It's not actually a 75 minute edit! It's an hour-long edit with 14 minutes of credits! And the editing is so much worse!


The 75-minute edit is the worst movie I've ever seen. However, I still find the original 90 minute version absolutely unwatchable without the riff. We still have countless characters ripping off DIsney movies with only slight variations, sometimes more than one per character! And I'll also admit that the songs on the 90-minute version are worse than the replacements on the 75 minute version (although I'm in the minority when I say the rap song on the original is slightly better than "Party Time." And let us not forget that the animation sucks, the jokes are shit, half the cast is pretty ugly and the story is hardly a story. You can choose which version you want to watch as far as I'm considered. Both are a 0 of ten. The only reason I'm not counting the edit as the version I'm counting as my OFFICIAL review is because I have a rule concerning my list of every movie I've seen ranked from best to worst: always put the best version of the movie on the list to be fair. This means I'm also giving the other movies a chance to post something worst. I decided not to nom the second worst movie I've ever seen, anyway, because I was thinking more in terms of what others would hate instead of what I would hate.


0/10.