Same sex marriage & Polygamy

I was about to say no email required, but you are talking about emailing photos to certain members, yes? You can either post it for all to see, which took me forever to do, so I know I can't say much about that, or you can email/PM them, yes. I'll get with you later in a PM, and maybe I can help you out. I'll let this thread get back on track.

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Completely off-topic, but I'd just like to say that I + repped rufnek here for the excellent use of the word "bumfuzzled". Absolutely superb, ruf. Made me both smile and chuckle. That's right, I smuckled.

No, I meant post them in the forum; Might as well give everyone an equal laugh. I'm computer illiterate so this form here looks like a email to me. I once tried to attach a photo to a message like so many others often do but couldn't get it to transfer. I've pictures and a scanner but lack the electronic know-how.

You got a plus rap for "smuckled!" A good, funny word!!!

Thanks, ruf! I figure, I'm English, I'll do what I want with my language.

I want to share with y'all a message I just received from my cousin Beverly, inviting friends and family to a Texas celebration of her marriage to Susan last summer:

"After 27 years together, Susan and I married -- fully, legally -- in Connecticut last summer. Now we are celebrating marriage rites and rights . . . Please join us for a picnic and music in the park as our families applaud the New England states which are, one by one, extending legal status to our relationships.

". . . Susan and I have waited anxiously for this opportunity since 1992, when Hawaii first kicked around the idea and then backed out. Our state [Texas] amended its constitution in 2005 to prevent same-gender marriages from being recognized. Shortly after that vote, [their daughter] Riley's best friend at school told me: 'My mom says it is against the law for you and Susan to marry, and the police will come get you if you try!'

"When we married Aug. 5, it was a moment we thought we might never know. It is one thing to be married as we were in our hearts, but marriage is not just an individual thing, affecting only two people. The marriage of a couple is part of the community, what makes it what it is as well. It means the world to us that in the United States, the New England communities honor our commitment to each other and acknowledge us as a part of the fabric. And now we know in our hearts, for sure, that the rest of the world will follow when it can."

I added the emphasis to my dear cousin's words because I've never heard it put better. And it is that one word--commitment--that will always separate marriage of couples, whether straight or gay, from polygamy.

Good stuff ruf

(PS, don't tell your cuz, but she coulda just come to the UK )

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Virtual Reality chatter on a movie site? Got endless amounts of it here. Reviews over here

That's cool, ruf. But I think it's possible to be commited to more than one person. But then, I'm not even capable of that, so I'm just talking here.

So as long as Drew says she's fine with you guys being polygamous, you'll have no problem "spreading the wealth"?

You can give all your love and fidelity to more than one person? I realize that parents can be committed to all their kids, but parental love isn't the same as "marital" love, I do believe. I'm just talking here.

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I'm not sure I could do it but I know people who are capable of loving multiple people at the same time in a committed relationship. In fact, I know people who feel they are polyamorous by nature and for them that's the only way they can be happy. I have no problem with that provided it involves consent adults that haven't been raised to think that's the only way of life open to them or that use public assistance to finance it.

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Bleacheddecay

That's interesting. How many of these groups of people have been together for something resembling a golden or even a silver anniversary without somebody breaking away from the relationship?

Good question. None so far in the group of people I know but they are young yet.

There's a lot of good stuff about the UK, but it's so damn far from the Texas Hill Country!!!

The most women I've ever juggled at one time (over a period of some months) was six, including a couple who were married and therefore didn't expect to see me on weekends when their husbands were around, and one who lived out of town and therefore didn't see me for weeks at a time.

Even so, it's tough keeping that many ladies in play and can only be done if you're not committed to any of them. If one drops you, you don't mind because by then you can use a few nights rest.

On the other hand, I once saw my little brother work a small South Texas barroom with 7 women scattered about that he was in various stages of relationships with, from just getting started to breaking up. Personally, I never liked to get women together where they can start comparing notes.

That reminds me of the time my brother Don was visiting me in Houston and I was sitting in Gilley's one night with him and his sweet thing of the moment. She gave him a kiss and said, "You know, we have so much in common." Don looked deep in her eyes and said, "You're right--we're both in love with me!" She thought he was kidding. But those of us who seem capable of loving more than one person at a time really don't love anyone so much as ourselves--we just let others share us for awhile, them move on.

Commitment--true commitment--is rare nowadays, even among couples. It's totally impossible in multiple relationships because there's always one person you rather see or spend time with at that moment than another. Start to buy Christmas presents and there's one you want to get something special for and others that you just make sure you buy a gift of some kind cause you know they'll buy something nice for you. One that you will put off so as to spend more time with another. That's why polygamy is as bad as group sex or line dancing--sooner or later someone gets a foot stepped on and their feelings hurt.

Well, it's a difficult relationship model to keep working but just because most people can't do it and do it well, doesn't mean other people can't.

Doesn't mean we should legalize bigamy just because someone might be adequate or even good at it. Most thieves aren't that good either, which is why so many get caught. But out of curiosity, what would be the minimum number of people capable of "doing" bigamy or poligamy that would justify its legalization? A dozen? A few hundred? Few thousand? A million or more? What's your guess on how many people in this day and age would want to practice poligamy if it were legal? Would you consider a poligamous relationship if available?

Personally, I'm always uncomfortable when my wife and my ex-wife are in the same room at grandkids' birthday parties. Damn sure wouldn't want them to start visiting and comparing notes.

I never said I was for legalizing it. I simply said I know people who feel they were born to only be happy in that relationship model. The model I'm talking about is polyamory, not polygamy.

Let's not make this about numbers, polygamists have numbers on their side

But you said yourself, you were playing them. That's not the same as polygamy. That's not even the same sport, let alone the same ballpark.


Why shouldn't it be legalized though? As I've said, I don't care, I'm just talking. But as long as everyone is aware of the situation, I fail to see the problem. Doesn't mean it's not there, just that I've yet to see it or have seen it, but don't consider it a problem.