Is it important to be a White male in order to be considered attractive in the USA?

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On the subject of obesity, I wanted to add that there are genetic and medical factors that can come into play that are unrelated to diet and beyond a person's control. Polycystic Ovary Syndrome, or PCOS, is an example of this. This condition is caused by a hormonal imbalance and, while the condition is not fully understood, there is evidence to suggest that it may be inherited genetically. Among other things (acne, excessive facial and body hair, thinning of the hair on the scalp, infertility), PCOS causes women to gain weight and to struggle to lose weight once it's gained.

I have PCOS. Now don't get me wrong, I don't deny my own culpability in regards to my obesity, but my eating habits are not the only thing to blame for it. The same can be said for many other overweight people too who may have the same or other conditions that contribute to obesity (thyroid conditions are another cause and affect people of both genders). So perhaps you should think twice before cracking another fat joke.



SC, if you genuinely care about those "kids out there are suicidal and killing themselves" then why do you downplay making fun of people when it suits you?
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SC, if you genuinely care about those "kids out there are suicidal and killing themselves" then why do you downplay making fun of people when it suits you?
Because he's a hypocrite.

You pretty much hit the nail on the head as to my point when I called him that. Apparently bullying is not okay, unless it's Sexy Celebrity who is the bully and/or the victim of the bullying is a fat person. Then it's just somebody having a little fun. Good times for all, right?



I don't think fat jokes should be taboo. Picking on a certian fat person isn't right, but fat jokes in general I don't really have a problem with. Many formerly overweight people say they lost all the weight because they were tired of being made fun of. So that is a benifet. As I do think slobbering over suicidees creates more suicide. If it wasn't such an extreme taboo to say anything disrespectful about someone who hanged themselves, far less people would do it. Tis why teen suicide cases have risen in recent years, somehow they've become heros.
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Yeah, there's no body mutilation in it



I don't think it's very useful to turn this into a discussion about whether or not it's ever okay to make jokes about something, because I'm not sure anyone's suggesting that it isn't.



Many formerly overweight people say they lost all the weight because they were tired of being made fun of. So that is a benifet.
And still many more go into deep depression, sometimes to the point considering suicide. This is not a benefit. Don't act like bullying is somehow a good deed. It isn't.



Originally Posted by Deadite
SC, if you genuinely care about those "kids out there are suicidal and killing themselves" then why do you downplay making fun of people when it suits you?
I care about the issue and I do think kids out there shouldn't be killing themselves over bullying. But here's the thing -- I'm not taking this as, "these kids are killing themselves because of bullying." NO. I have never bought into this. Even years ago, I was ranting about this with people when that one gay college student jumped off a bridge after his roommate secretly videotaped him and a male friend having sex. That really, in my mind, set off a lot of this stuff in regards to bullying and "It Gets Better" and all that.

I was bullied when I was a kid. LOTS of people get bullied. It's extremely common. AND THEY DON'T KILL THEMSELVES. I didn't kill myself, obviously.

There is something else to this whole issue of bullying. You can't fix it with "It Gets Better" videos or, in the case of Karen Klein, $700,000. It isn't just that a bunch of people are being mean to kids and it's making the kids kill themselves. Something is keeping these kids from surviving, and it's not just the bullies. Either there's something wrong with society and culture at large (my biggest guess) that's upsetting these kids and making them weak, or they have chemical imbalances and they need medical help. It isn't just about the bullies. Maybe it's gotten worse because now every act of bullying comes with the added bonus of it getting filmed or photographed thanks to everyone now having cameras on hand with their phones, but still, I think something else is wrong -- and to me, this whole Karen Klein thing is an example of what's wrong. Like I've said, an old woman should not be the poster girl for bullying and teen suicides. I think the obsession with the bullying issue should be dropped entirely -- THEN I bet it would actually end. People should learn how to just deal with it. If you go looking for victim status, you're a victim, and you won't be a survivor. You have to move past it and just own it. The guy who jumped off a bridge because his friend videotaped him was ridiculous. I would have thought, "Well, why is my friend taping me having sex? Is he curious? Does he want to see me doing that?" People need to be FIERCE. They need to develop tools of strength and attitude -- they don't need to see the allure of being labeled as a victim, which is what I think is very prevalent right now in society. Even with the fat jokes issue -- can't anybody find any strength and positive attitude in being fat?

This is why some people here are annoyed with me being "stereotypically gay" -- they would rather see me BUTTON MY MOUTH and not express my gay feelings. Not admit about liking Jake Gyllenhaal or whatever. Not make jokes. These people would rather see me bow under the pressures of trying to act "like everyone else." Well, that's not what I believe in. I believe in personality and strength. I believe in just going with it than being a victim and trying to restrain all of my characteristics. I mean, hell, I'll openly admit that I ain't the "sexy celebrity" I once was anymore. I've put on weight. I've lost hair. You can all make fun of me as much as you want. I ENCOURAGE YOU TO. In fact, I wish my username was something like "Fat Bastard" now or something just to reflect the truth. I've gotten older and I've changed and evolved. And I'm not killing myself over it.

Because he's a hypocrite.

You pretty much hit the nail on the head as to my point when I called him that. Apparently bullying is not okay, unless it's Sexy Celebrity who is the bully and/or the victim of the bullying is a fat person. Then it's just somebody having a little fun. Good times for all, right?
That is so not true. That's ridiculous. You don't know what you're talking about. You're just trying to paint me as a villain.



I don't think fat jokes should be taboo. Picking on a certian fat person isn't right, but fat jokes in general I don't really have a problem with. Many formerly overweight people say they lost all the weight because they were tired of being made fun of. So that is a benifet. As I do think slobbering over suicidees creates more suicide. If it wasn't such an extreme taboo to say anything disrespectful about someone who hanged themselves, far less people would do it. Tis why teen suicide cases have risen in recent years, somehow they've become heros.
I think you are very wise and very intelligent and mature for your age.



I don't think it's very useful to turn this into a discussion about whether or not it's ever okay to make jokes about something, because I'm not sure anyone's suggesting that it isn't.
I think there's a lot of people out there who are saying it isn't ever okay, though. That's what I believe. Miss Vicky might be one of those people.



I'm not old, you're just 12.
Speaking as someone who was bullied for about 90% of his adolescence, yes, you do survive it, but at the same time, you never really are the person you could have been had it not happened. I am, admittedly, a quiet, self-conscious man who suffers from social anxiety and depression. I truly believe, that had something been done about the near constant harrassment (and not just by me, cause I certainly got into plenty of fights over it, it just gets to be hopeless when it feels like nothing you can do will stop it), I'd have turned out different, been more confident...I am terrified at the thought that some day my children will be subjected to the same thing. I am damaged. Permanently. All by idiots who thought it was hilarious to pick on the poor kid, the fat kid, the smart kid. So yes, I have NO tolerance for "humor" that ridicules or belittles others, even if it isn't a particular person. These are just my thoughts, feel free to attack me as being overly sensitive or whatever, I don't really care anymore. Just showing why it is I feel the way I do.
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What does it mean for you to care about the "issue", SC? You are okay with bullying in practice but in theory you hate it?

Aren't you basically identifying with the aggressor and blaming the victim? Substitute "rape" for bullying and tell us how appealing your position would be.



That is so not true. That's ridiculous. You don't know what you're talking about. You're just trying to paint me as a villain.
Yes, it is true. You may not have said that in so many words but that is the actual message of your posts. I'm not painting you as anything. All those brushstrokes are your own.



I don't think fat jokes should be taboo. Picking on a certian fat person isn't right, but fat jokes in general I don't really have a problem with. Many formerly overweight people say they lost all the weight because they were tired of being made fun of. So that is a benifet. As I do think slobbering over suicidees creates more suicide. If it wasn't such an extreme taboo to say anything disrespectful about someone who hanged themselves, far less people would do it. Tis why teen suicide cases have risen in recent years, somehow they've become heros.
Yeh, a lot of victim stuff is done because of the attention. Nowadays with social media it's become even easier for these people to showcase 'their suffering' and people post depressing videos, pictures of them cutting themselves etc. in order to get likes, comments, reaction. If there wasn't such a fuss and people going on about it, no one would care, because it's a sensitive issue people play on it.

This isn't saying that bullying okay, because it isn't. What Donnie says about fat jokes you can kind of apply to other things, for example, how many people here laugh at racist jokes? But would those same people ever deliberately attack someone in a racist manner?

Jokes are jokes people, stop being so sensitive (to a degree, obviously there's extreme cases where there is clearly a problem), take things on the chin and be yourself.

I don't get why so many people on here get so worked up other some of the posts, especially from Sexy, who although abrupt, outspoken and most of the times controversial, never shies away from himself, and is just that himself, he does no harm, and most of the times I find myself laughing.
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Speaking as someone who was bullied for about 90% of his adolescence, yes, you do survive it, but at the same time, you never really are the person you could have been had it not happened.
Maybe you're better off because of it, though. It doesn't mean you're going to miss out on a better life just because you were bullied. Hell, you might end up having a BETTER life than you could have imagined because you were bullied and because you experienced that. Being bullied does not mean you are going to be destroyed for life. For some people, that happens, but I doubt it's the majority.

Originally Posted by Monkeypunch
I am, admittedly, a quiet, self-conscious man who suffers from social anxiety and depression. I truly believe, that had something been done about the near constant harrassment (and not just by me, cause I certainly got into plenty of fights over it, it just gets to be hopeless when it feels like nothing you can do will stop it), I'd have turned out different, been more confident...I am terrified at the thought that some day my children will be subjected to the same thing. I am damaged. Permanently. All by idiots who thought it was hilarious to pick on the poor kid, the fat kid, the smart kid. So yes, I have NO tolerance for "humor" that ridicules or belittles others, even if it isn't a particular person. These are just my thoughts, feel free to attack me as being overly sensitive or whatever, I don't really care anymore. Just showing why it is I feel the way I do.
I sympathize with you because I know you and care about you. I do believe in what you're saying. But I totally think you could use new frames of references that would help you to get over it and to feel stronger because of it. And not feel "permanently damaged." We all have our marks and nicks -- some worse than others. But we don't need to carry them around and say, "I was bullied. I am not the person I could have been. I am destroyed. I am hopeless."

You are all you have, Sir. I think you're talented and that you're a great artist and that you could be very famous because of your work. And I hope you'll stop seeing yourself as damaged permanently. You have a past in your head that's nightmarish, I imagine, but it's not happening to you now. In the present time, you can find peace and strength. You'll always be someone who was once bullied, but you don't have to be him today.



Yes, it is true. You may not have said that in so many words but that is the actual message of your posts. I'm not painting you as anything. All those brushstrokes are your own.
Oh, I'm so done with this. Yak yak yak. Goodbye.



What does it mean for you to care about the "issue", SC? You are okay with bullying in practice but in theory you hate it?

Aren't you basically identifying with the aggressor and blaming the victim? Substitute "rape" for bullying and tell us how appealing your position would be.
That's rape. That's a whole other issue.



I'm not old, you're just 12.
I sympathize with you because I know you and care about you. I do believe in what you're saying. But I totally think you could use new frames of references that would help you to get over it and to feel stronger because of it. And not feel "permanently damaged." We all have our marks and nicks -- some worse than others. But we don't need to carry them around and say, "I was bullied. I am not the person I could have been. I am destroyed. I am hopeless."

You are all you have, Sir. I think you're talented and that you're a great artist and that you could be very famous because of your work. And I hope you'll stop seeing yourself as damaged permanently. You have a past in your head that's nightmarish, I imagine, but it's not happening to you now. In the present time, you can find peace and strength. You'll always be someone who was once bullied, but you don't have to be him today.
I don't feel like I'm hopeless, nor destroyed, but I do feel like I was robbed of so many things I could have done or experienced because I lacked the confidence to just go for them. I have a decent life now, I'll say that. I have a woman who loves me, and a few loyal friends, but I often can't control the negative thoughts in my head on some days. It makes life...difficult. I do my best, though.



I don't feel like I'm hopeless, nor destroyed, but I do feel like I was robbed of so many things I could have done or experienced because I lacked the confidence to just go for them. I have a decent life now, I'll say that. I have a woman who loves me, and a few loyal friends, but I often can't control the negative thoughts in my head on some days. It makes life...difficult. I do my best, though.
I have that kind of squawking in my head all the time, too. Just get some better squawking going on. Find things and people that make you feel good.