Hotseat! Grill a MoFo: Miss Vicky

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I had Gladiator on VHS back when it first came out. I liked it at the time and watched it several times, but it was never a favorite of mine and I don't enjoy watching it anymore. It's too over the top for me, but then again it's been like ten years since I watched it. I don't even really know how I feel about it anymore. It's probably my least liked Ridley Scott film. It's also the favorite film of one of my closest friends.
My least liked Ridley Scott film is A Good Year. Absolutely horrible.

I guess Gladiator is a little "over the top," but I every time I watch it, I still get thrilled by the battles scenes and moved to tears by the ending. I don't think I'll ever stop loving it. Also, if you look at my favorite films, "over the top" could be applied to many of them.

Also, that is hilarious that you made a coworker cry.
Well, I didn't really make her cry, I just made her cry more. The manager had unwisely asked me to show this particular person how to do the end of day procedures - close out the credit card terminal, count the cashbox and log the cash, etc. It's common knowledge in the office that I don't like this particular person. At all. You see, I have this apparently radical notion that employees should show up for work as scheduled, get there on time, and do their jobs. She has other ideas of what a good work ethic means. I also have this radical notion that anybody who works in a veterinary hospital should be able to use common sense and also be able to compute simple math.

Long story sort of short, when it was time to deal with the cashbox and deposit, instead of you know, counting the cash or asking for help, she sat there and cried. When I discovered what was happening, I tried to explain to her what to do. I started by saying "It's really simple" (which it is, the cash log has a chart with a column to write down the quantity of each type of bill or coin and a second column to write down the value of each) and her immediate response was to snap at me "Maybe it's simple for you, but I'm really bad at math."

#1. She hadn't actually done any math yet. She hadn't counted a single bill or coin at that point.
#2. The only actual math required is addition, subtraction and multiplication. Basic grade school level math.
#3. She was holding a calculator in her hand as she was sitting there crying.

Anyway, I gritted my teeth and explained to her what to do. Then I stepped out of the room and vented about the situation to the other employee that I'd been talking to earlier. I also expressed my concern that the one I don't like has aspirations to become a licensed tech - something that requires the ability to calculate doses of medication, which if done incorrectly may cause serious adverse effects depending on the drug - and that she really had no business being employed there at all (for the record, she's been there 7 or 8 months now, so she not really a new hire anymore). She overheard what I said, which got her more upset.

Now, I didn't exactly censor myself when I vented and the other employee and I had some laughs at her expense, which admittedly is unprofessional, but I was too irritated to care at that point.

But yeah, I don't feel any remorse about the situation.

Why do you think people here label you as a "bitch?" Do you agree? You seem to have embraced it, how do you feel about it?
I think it's mostly because I'm bluntly honest about my opinions. I don't have a very good filter when it comes to holding back negative thoughts or wording things in ways to soften the blow. I do enjoy a good fight now and then, am slow to forgive, and have a tendency to fixate on certain issues, so that all ties into the "bitch" thing. Also, the labeling isn't just here. I've been labeled a bitch my whole adult life. I suppose I am a bitch, but I think there's often at least some justification to my bitchiness. So I wear it with pride, which takes some stress off of me and also takes power away from those who would try to insult me with the word.



I had a hard time figuring you out at first. But I think I feel comfortable now. Well thanks for the story. That whole situation is just too funny. It reminds me of a story of my own.

My mom is the manager of a uniform store, and I worked for her every now and then over the years. But I do not envy her for the morons she has to work with on a daily basis. This one girl pulled out the calculator to figure out what 10% off $11 was. I just looked her dead in the eyes and said, "Are you serious? You need a calculator?" Then I took out a piece of paper and taught her in a very condescending manner right in front of the customer.

Here was the diagram I wrote:

11
x.10
-----
00
11
-----
1.10

"Zero times one is zero, and zero times one is zero, and one times one is one, and one times one is one. Zero plus zero is zero, and zero plus one is one, and one plus nothing is one. That makes 110, and there's two decimal points so that gives you one dollar and ten cents which when subtracted from eleven dollars equals nine dollars and ninety cents. You do not need a calculator to multiply 1x1 or add 1+1 do you?"

You should have seen the scowl on our other coworker's face. And I didn't even get in trouble for insulting her so much in front of the other employee and a customer. My mom was actually annoyed that she needed to use the calculator for such basic math. In hindsight I would never do something that mean intentionally. I don't know what came over me, but I was just so boggled by how stupid it was to pull out a calculator for something so simple. I mean I took the complicated route just to stress how stupid it was because you're really only adding and multiplying by 1's and 0's. The even easier route is you just move the decimal place over one when dividing by ten. 11x.10 is the same as 11 divided by 10. Another funny element was the fact that the customer wasn't phased by how I insulted my coworker in front of her, she actually offered another simple way to do it and I could tell she was annoyed by how stupid my coworker was.

I'm actually a very polite and kind person, and I'm pretty scrawny. So it always surprises me when someone actually gets intimidated or stressed out by me like that. I'm more aggressive on the internet, but I've been trying to curb that.



Yeah, that's pretty sad.

But I think this is worse: One morning I went to count the cashbox and the sum that I came up with did not match what was supposed to have been left in the box the previous night. It was over by a few cents.

So I reviewed the log entry from the previous day. Very quickly I noticed where the error had come from. The person that had counted the box the previous night had written in the log that there was $8.16 worth of quarters in the box.

Eight dollars and sixteen cents in quarters.

When I showed it to the person who had done end of day the previous night, her response was "That's what the calculator said."



Oh, Lord. I see a love nest being built. Miss Vicky and Zotis are a match made in Heaven.



Okay, that story takes the cake. Sometimes I just don't know if I'm glad or angry that there are so many stupid people. On one hand they provide constant amusement, but on the other hand they can cause serious damage.

And SC... just lol.



Have you ever skinned an animal?
Have you run something over and taken it home to eat?
Have you been stung by a jellyfish?
Do you have anything at home which you made at school?
Have you saved someone's life?
Can you see yourself ever liking a film more than Quills?
Who would you like to play you in a film version of your life?
Were you good at maths at school?
Was there a job/career your family really wanted you to be in/part of?
Ever pretended a banana was a gun?
__________________
5-time MoFo Award winner.



Have you ever skinned an animal?
No. I'd probably get nauseated and vomit everywhere if I tried it. Or I'd bawl my eyes out. Or both.

Have you run something over and taken it home to eat?
I've never run over an animal and I certainly don't eat roadkill.

Have you been stung by a jellyfish?
No. To my knowledge, the closest I've come to a jellyfish was looking at the ones on display at the Monterey Bay Aquarium. I'm a pretty poor swimmer, so I stay out of the ocean. I also had a scary incident on a beach in Santa Cruz when I was little where I nearly got pulled under by the current and my grandma had to pull me out, so I reserve swimming for backyard pools and the occasional lake.

Do you have anything at home which you made at school?
There might still be some homemade Christmas ornaments or something somewhere, but most of that stuff got trashed years ago.

Have you saved someone's life?
No.

Can you see yourself ever liking a film more than Quills?
Sure, if something truly exceptional comes along, but I'm not gonna hold my breath.

Who would you like to play you in a film version of your life?
Christina Ricci

Were you good at maths at school?
No. English was always my strongest subject.

Was there a job/career your family really wanted you to be in/part of?
No. When I was little my mother would tell me that when I grew up I should marry a rich old man so that when he died I could have his money.

Ever pretended a banana was a gun?
Not that I can remember. I usually just played with squirt guns or homemade rubber band guns instead.



Do you ever report spammers?
Have you ever taken something from a skip or the side of the road and taken it home?
Would you have any cosmetic surgery?
Have you ever organised a treasure hunt?
When was the last time you wrote a letter?
Do you like flying?
Do you prefer milk or dark chocolate?



Do you ever report spammers?
All the time.

Have you ever taken something from a skip or the side of the road and taken it home?

Several times, yes. Once was a small American flag that someone just ditched on the sidewalk. It seemed wrong to leave it there to get stepped on or kicked. The other times I picked up cash that people had dropped.

Would you have any cosmetic surgery?
I suppose I might consider some lipo if I were filthy rich, but probably would just hire a cook and a personal trainer instead.

Have you ever organised a treasure hunt?
No. I'm not fan of them, either.

When was the last time you wrote a letter?
Several years ago. I came across some old papers and one of them had the address of a guy I used to talk to all the time in the AOL chatrooms when I was in high school. I figured he probably didn't have his old AOL email anymore (do they even still exist?) so I wrote him a letter. It was actually his parents' address, but they forwarded it to him and he and I got back in contact for a little while. We've lost touch again since then, though.

Do you like flying?
I hate flying. I hate airports. I hate travel by car, too. I like being at whatever destination I'm going to, but getting there and getting back sucks. I'm going to Las Vegas for a few days in March and I'm not looking forward to the actual trip.

Do you prefer milk or dark chocolate?
Milk chocolate all the way. I'll only eat dark chocolate if it's a filled candy or chocolate covered nuts, but as the main ingredient? No way.



Can you speak another language?
Do you see any point in 'made up' languages (Klingon, Elvish, etc)?
Have you ever used your voice for evil?
Would you use/wear google glasses?
What was the best present you can remember getting?
If you could chose a period of American history to've lived in, what would it be and why?
Have you ever won a competition?
Is there something specific you don't like/trust in someone? For example, my Granddad never trusted men with brown shoes.



Can you speak another language?
No. I can understand a little bit of Spanish (I took a few classes in school and have worked for a Mexican for almost 10 years) but can't speak it.

Do you see any point in 'made up' languages (Klingon, Elvish, etc)?
Not at all.

Have you ever used your voice for evil?
Not unless yelling obscenities at people counts.

Would you use/wear google glasses?
Hell no.

What was the best present you can remember getting?
This guy:


His name was Goobers and he was one of the sweetest rats I've ever known. I miss him terribly.

Technically my older cat, Tiny, was also a gift - but I didn't want another cat at the time and it took me at least a year to become emotionally attached to him. He was a sickly kitten who'd been from a colony of semi-feral barn cats, so he wasn't the sweet and playful companion that most kittens are. I wouldn't give him up for the world now, though.

If you could chose a period of American history to've lived in, what would it be and why?
The 1970s. I'd have loved to see my favorite musicians in their heyday.

Have you ever won a competition?
I was part of the winning team in a few competitions for Odyssey of the Mind which was for GATE (gifted and talented education) students. I was in the GATE program for a few years in elementary school. The competitions we did involved designing and building a structure out of balsa wood and then seeing how much weight it could hold. One year, we also had to script and act out a skit to go with it.

I've also won two online pet photo competitions. The first was with the photo of Goobers I posted for the "best present" question. The second was with this photo of the same rat:



Is there something specific you don't like/trust in someone? For example, my Granddad never trusted men with brown shoes.
I don't trust a man who doesn't like cats, does that count?



Yep, that counts. Luckily I like cats, so we're still cool.

Have you ever shaved someone else?
Have you had to get rid of something you've collected because you didn't have the room for it?
When you see the words "fancy dress" on an invite, does your heart soar or sink?
Do you find clouds interesting?
Is there a name which always makes you laugh?
Have you ever milked an animal?
Would you say you have green fingers?
Have you ever had a sticker album?
Did you ever sneak into a cinema?



Have you ever shaved someone else?
No.

Have you had to get rid of something you've collected because you didn't have the room for it?
No, but I've boxed stuff up and shoved it in a closet due to no room. I may be facing getting rid of some movies to make room for more, though.

When you see the words "fancy dress" on an invite, does your heart soar or sink?
Those words have never appeared on an invite I've received. Americans don't say "fancy dress" they say "costume."

Anyway, nearly all the themed/costume parties I've attended were costume optional and for the one that wasn't my costume was provided by the hostess. So my heart does neither, really. I don't stress it.

Do you find clouds interesting?
I did when I was a kid. These days I rarely look up at the sky. When I'm out walking it's usually along the trail that runs by my house and there's lots of wildlife to look at that are far more interesting than some puffs of water vapor in the sky.

Is there a name which always makes you laugh?
Ezekiel. Also Dick.

Have you ever milked an animal?
I milked a goat once. I was in the Girl Scouts for a few years when I was a kid and we took a trip out to a farm.

Would you say you have green fingers?
The only plants I can keep alive are the ones in my aquariums because they don't require watering.

Have you ever had a sticker album?
Nope. I loved stickers but never kept an album. I stuck them to my bedroom door or to the headboard on my bed, much to my parents' dismay.

Did you ever sneak into a cinema?
No. I've always paid for a ticket. I'm a bitch, but I'm an honest bitch.



For some reason, when I was typing out the milking question, I thought "I bet she's milked a goat". No idea why.

Did you/do you not have sticker albums out there? Y'know, Panini and stuff like that? I remember getting Fox & The Hound, ET, Back To The Future, Gremlinsm Smash Hits, Return Of The Jedi and god know what else. Countless football albums.





Did you/do you not have sticker albums out there? Y'know, Panini and stuff like that? I remember getting Fox & The Hound, ET, Back To The Future, Gremlinsm Smash Hits, Return Of The Jedi and god know what else. Countless football albums.


Did those come with like a sheet of stickers that you were supposed to put in the album? I think I may have had Care Bear and Popples albums, but I still stuck the stickers to other things instead.



Over here they come in packs. There's usually 5 stickers in a pack and you buy the album for the stickers. Each has a number on it and you put it in the corresponding frame. For example, that picture of the mum spraying the Gremlin is four stickers, each a quarter of the picture.



I remember those HK, not well enough to remember what ones I had though. I was into baseball cards at that age. Went through a Garbage Pail Kid stage as well. You remember those?
__________________
Letterboxd



A decade ago, I had a Nightmare on Elm Street sticker album. I got it at Hot Topic.