Oops, one more. (SPOILERS AHEAD)
I had attempted to wipe this film from my mind by subjecting myself to shock therapy for 43 hours straight, but instead of forgetting the film, I managed to fuse my body with one of the skulls of Ghidorah, after which I was electrocuted, transferring part of my consciousness and that of Ghidorah into a giant metal lizard. Our consciousnesses merged, becoming one mega-mecha-consciousness, after which, we ran amuck, smashing up a city, and getting into a tag team match with a giant monkey and a giant lizard. The aforementioned giant monkey and lizard were natives of The Hollow Earth(TM Disney Theme Parks, 2021), a place with inverted gravity that you reach by flying a spaceship into a tunnel, which goes through a gravity warp gate, so as to make sure you don't implode, unless you are a monkey, in which case you just climb up by sliding down while holding on to a hatchet. I know this all happened, because a conspiracy theorist, who has a super-secret plan to infiltrate an evil corporation, which he announced publicly on his podcast, because that's what you do to keep **** secret, documented everything, broadcasting it to everyone, including the people who run the evil corporation.
Wingard, 2021
I had attempted to wipe this film from my mind by subjecting myself to shock therapy for 43 hours straight, but instead of forgetting the film, I managed to fuse my body with one of the skulls of Ghidorah, after which I was electrocuted, transferring part of my consciousness and that of Ghidorah into a giant metal lizard. Our consciousnesses merged, becoming one mega-mecha-consciousness, after which, we ran amuck, smashing up a city, and getting into a tag team match with a giant monkey and a giant lizard. The aforementioned giant monkey and lizard were natives of The Hollow Earth(TM Disney Theme Parks, 2021), a place with inverted gravity that you reach by flying a spaceship into a tunnel, which goes through a gravity warp gate, so as to make sure you don't implode, unless you are a monkey, in which case you just climb up by sliding down while holding on to a hatchet. I know this all happened, because a conspiracy theorist, who has a super-secret plan to infiltrate an evil corporation, which he announced publicly on his podcast, because that's what you do to keep **** secret, documented everything, broadcasting it to everyone, including the people who run the evil corporation.
Kong vs Godzilla
Wingard, 2021
I was so bummed by Godzilla: King Of The Monsters as I thought its predecessor had done enough to make slogging it through all the human bull**** but G:KotM was just painful bull****. Why, oh ****ing why can't American studios understand that these movies are about the monsters not some lame one-dimensional "characters" they make up in some studio spit-balling meeting?
Haven't seen this new one yet but it hurts me to think that it could be just as bad or worse.