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I'd say the worst re-make of all time is the '83 version of Breathless with Richard Gere. The 1960 original Jean-Luc Godard film is one of the corner-stones of the French New Wave. The Americanized re-make is soulless, pointless, witless and just downright awful in every way imaginable.
Some other Foreign languge classics badly mangled when Hollwood needlessly re-made them: Diabolique (original 1955/re-make 1996), The Vanishing (1988/1993), City of Angels (1987/1998), Jacob the Liar (1974/1999), Point of No Return (1990/1993). The odd thing with The Vanishing is the director of the chilling original also helmed the re-make, yet it's still terrible.
Gus Van Sant's 1998 re-make of Psycho was simply a waste of time, money and resources. It's not unwatchably bad in and of itself, but the very idea of intentionally re-making a masterpiece nearly shot-for-shot is bafflingly retarded. I really love some of Van Sant's work, but I'll never understand the impulse that resulted in this vapid movie. An even worse Hitchcok re-make, if you can imagine such a thing, is the 1979 version of The Lady Vanishes starring Cybill Shepherd & Elliott Gould. A Perfect Murder was unnecessary. Lots of other horrible Hitch do-overs have been done, but mostly junk for T.V.
And I hated Hitch's own re-make of The Man Who Knew Too Much. I think the '56 version with Stewart & Doris Day is a major disappointment, much less impressive than the '34 original. The original is often crude technically, being a still fairly early sound film. But the humor and most especially the villains in that version are so much more interesting. I suspect Hitch was going for some satirical comment on Eisenhower-era middle class complacency with the re-make, but I don't think it comes off. Doris Day completely ruins the movie for me. The actual assasination attempt and the Bernard Herrmann cameo are nice in the newer film, but otherwise I think it's a FAR inferior version of the original, which I still find witty, fun and thrilling.
The recent re-make of Get Carter with Sly Stallone was a travesty from conception onward. There's only one Jack Carter, and his name is Michael Caine. I love the bulk of Sidney Lumet's work, but why on Earth he tried to re-do Cassavetes' Gloria with Sharon frippin' Stone is beyond me. Walter Hill's Last Man Standing is a pale embarassment in comparison to both Kurosawa and Leone. The Chris Rock vehicle Down To Earth is a dull re-make of a good re-make (Beatty's Heaven Can Wait and Alex Hall's Here Comes Mr. Jordan). Babs Streisand's very '70s version of A Star is Born is so awful it's almost laughable (almost). Likewise the '80 Jazz Singer with Niel Diamond is a head scratcher. They needlessly re-made Preston Struges' perfect Unfaithfully Yours in the '80s with Dudley Moore. You've Got Mail was a dumb modernized version of Ernst Lubitsch's The Shop Around the Corner.
Some of my favorite re-makes are A Fistful of Dollars (1964 - Leone), Cape Fear (1991 - Scorsese), His Girl Friday (1940 - Hawks), The Underneath (1995 - Soderbergh), Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1978 - Phil Kaufman), The Fly (1986 - Cronenberg), Dirty Rotten Scoundrels (1997 - Frank Oz), Little Shop of Horrors (1986 - Frank Oz), and Thieves Like Us (1974 - Altman).
But I suppose if I had to pick just one as the very best, I'd go with John Carpenter's 1982 take on The Thing as well.
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"Film is a disease. When it infects your bloodstream it takes over as the number one hormone. It bosses the enzymes, directs the pineal gland, plays Iago to your psyche. As with heroin, the antidote to Film is more Film." - Frank Capra
Last edited by Holden Pike; 12-12-01 at 07:16 AM.