The 2nd MoFo Hall of Infamy : Son of Infamy

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I watched this 4 days ago and I'd already forgotten what it was about. What an endurance test this thing is.
LOL. At one point it went back to the characters on the surface and I was like "Ah! Who are these people?!?!?!?!" . . . it had only been about 30 minutes since an extended sequence with them in it.




Carnival of Souls (Adam Grossman, 1998)

I don't really think this is any dumber than any other psychological thriller (the dumbest genre outside of maybe the whodunit) per se but this is really just a series of tropes presented with no flair, energy or even really attempts at intrigue. Production-wise it feels like its straight out of one of those horror anthology series' from around this time (maybe this was made for TV? I didn't look into it) and there's not even any decent ideas for imagery let alone any imagery that actually hits. The only even kind of interesting shot is the one where the guy is in the mirror behind the bar and he's like, way too big? and that's only interesting because of how poorly done the effect is. Not much to mention with this one, just one of the blandest things I've ever seen and normally I wouldn't give this low a score to something this inoffensive but idk this sucks lol.




The Misty Green Sky (Jack Foster, 2016)

So I picked this one because its apparently one of the worst things ever (of course) but also because janky 3D animation appeals to me more than probably anyone here so I figured I might have something that will do well in this hall without killing me to watch lmao. And yeah, this didn't kill me but it is still far from enjoyable. Obviously put together by one person with stolen assets (allegedly, I didn't really look into it that much), stock music of varying quality and some very not good voice acting and is clearly some kind of fetish thing for the director, despite being weirdly sexless. Then again, sex would probably be too complicated to animate so we just have a regular transport ship that jizzes on the main character until her clothes melt off I guess? The plot itself is also weirdly not horny in nature outside of some mentions of polygamy, the film just has all of its models wearing almost nothing and having absurd jiggle physics. There's also a bunch of weird rendering issues like frame rate drops and some stuff that I can't tell if its the actual film or the upload I watched was just messed up. Also there's a scene that just has no sound? Like a scene that should clearly have lots of sound. I watched this on youtube so idk if they cut some copyrighted music from the upload or if its just like that lmao. I guess some of the camerawork is okay? Like there's angles and stuff. Its gotta be the strongest aspect of the film, which isn't saying much, but that combined with a somewhat brisk pace it at least goes by pretty quick and I did get a couple laughs out of it, so there's that. Also, absolutely insane that this goes for the ending that it does. Like why does this borderline porno have an ending this bleak?? This is extremely not good at all but at least its kind of weird.





The Misty Green Sky, 2016

I'm a good looking young woman!

In an unspecified future, Emma (Maggie H. Taylor) discovers a terrible secret about her home: she doesn't live on Earth but rather some other strange outpost planet. With only a computerized "God" to answer her questions, and often evasively, Emma becomes determined to find out the truth behind her situation.

Okay, so this film is basically porn, but like, porn for cowards. (And maybe for those who have the wisdom to not try to look up the short-shorts of un-animated teenage girls?)

The story itself is dime-a-dozen sci-fi stuff, and if the film had any storytelling skills, I probably wouldn't bag on the plot too much. I think that if you said the plot to someone ("A girl realizes she's living on some random outpost planet instead of Earth, so she smuggles her way onto this strange space station that's orbiting her planet") it would actually sound decently interesting.

But really the only interest this movie generated for me was sort of a horror-fascination with its perviness and overall incompetence.

Let's talk about the perviness. Do we know how old Emma is meant to be? I don't remember. And frankly it doesn't super matter to me splitting hairs about whether she's 16 or 18 or whatever. The character looks like someone animated a blow-up doll, finding any excuse to shoot her character looking up into her crotch. I mean, very early on she takes a weird lateral step and I was like "Wup, okay. Yup. That was her vulva. Thanks, but no thanks." Things get more overt as they go on (Oh, no! A strange liquid melted off my clothes and now my heaving breasts are bare and I have only this little bikini bottom on!). As the character breathes, her breasts don't just rise and fall to an absurd degree, they, like, pulse? Expand and contract? Anyway, young this woman needs to speak to a doctor. The ickiness of this is slightly alleviated by how crappy the animation is. If I felt like I was looking at realistic bodies, I'd be pretty squicked. But this is like a cheap cut-scene in a video game had their clothing removed.

The only so-bad-it's-good element here is the extreme shoddiness of the production. At times the animation seems to shudder and stall, like these strange little moments of unintentional slow motion. The compositions are bland and uninspired, and they lack literal texture. Everything looks and feels flat. There's also the way that Emma's clothing just randomly changes in the middle of scenes. There's her bikini bottom and then there are these short-shorts, and sometimes within the same scene she alternates between them randomly. It really, honestly feels like no one actually cared about what was happening on screen as long as it gave you a chance to ogle the main character (or any of the other porn-bot female characters).

Can I give this film one little teeny-tiny scrap of praise? There was a scene that felt like it was heading for sexual assault territory, and I was relieved it didn't go there.

This whole thing has very sad "If I draw her, she has to take her clothes off when I say so!" vibes. You can't tell me that anyone actually enjoyed this film outside of the titillation. Just go pay for some ethically-produced adult films, ya pervs!




despite being weirdly sexless.
I actually found the lack of direct sexual content almost more disturbing.

Like, two people having (poorly animated) sex would have been less bothersome than "Oh, no! A girl fell down! Let's zoom in on her crotch!" or the near-naked Emma pleading "Oh, no! Don't punish me!" from the ship's floor.



I actually found the lack of direct sexual content almost more disturbing.

Like, two people having (poorly animated) sex would have been less bothersome than "Oh, no! A girl fell down! Let's zoom in on her crotch!" or the near-naked Emma pleading "Oh, no! Don't punish me!" from the ship's floor.
Yeah I can see that for sure. Personally, I got more second-hand embarrassment from it than anything. Like I'd want to bully the nerd that made this if I didn't think he'd be into it lol.



Yeah I can see that for sure. Personally, I got more second-hand embarrassment from it than anything. Like I'd want to bully the nerd that made this if I didn't think he'd be into it lol.
LOL. There's a scene in The Devil's Backbone (I Think?) where one of the kids has drawn a naked women, but he has drawn her vulva sideways.

Anyway, that's what I thought of every time they showed topless Emma's nipples-pointed-upwards, expanding-and-contracting breasts. The person who made this film must have seen a woman's body, right? Like, at least once?



I guess some of the camerawork is okay? Like there's angles and stuff.
Can I give this film one little teeny-tiny scrap of praise? There was a scene that felt like it was heading for sexual assault territory, and I was relieved it didn't go there.
Yall are really making quite a pitch for this thing.
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Yall are really making quite a pitch for this thing.
We've set the bar pretty low.

I can confirm that there are angles in The Green Misty Sky, if only because it's hard to look up someone's shorts without moving a camera down and then angling it up.



Out of sheer curiosity, I just finished "The Green Misty Sky". First thought was this is just bad computer animation, the type you see in cookie cutter kids shows that my granddaughter watches. Second thought was the "Barbarella" approach to intergalactic fashion statements. Constantly changing, just for the sake of changing. Sometimes in mid-scene, nice touch.


Other noteworthy tidbits were the constant pulsating of breasts. Actors reading from a script, as if reading from a high school book report. Swore I could actually hear the pages turning. Lifeless eyes, odd expressions, random "Holy Motors" type bizarro world nonsense.


Yeah this was really bad. Kudoes to the nominator, I think.



Loqueesha

OK, first, lemme admit that I grew up around a bunch of center-right Christian conservatives who valued African American culture, and one of them taught me about racism and shared my opinions on how ridiculous it is. Because I have a family of conservatives, liberals and neutrals who all get along pretty well, I naturally look at things from a neutral perspective. Also, lemme just point out that Rob Paulsen is one of my favorite people so I have a different interpretation of the ideals of mimicing accents than some people would.

I DID NOT LIKE THIS MOVIE.

First of all, It goes without saying that its attempt at handling the argument of reversing the White Chicks scenario came off as too strong to the point where it was preachy. Of course, Saville would cast himself as the guy with all the answers, so many that he could pick Kira out of Japan just by taking one look at Light Yagami. See, I DO believe in equality in every way, shape and form. I also believe in due process. Do I believe that in the context of a dumb comedy movie a guy can pretend to be another race for the sake of a plot? It depends on the scenario. If it's something less racially-centered like in White Chicks where they only pretended to be two white girls to spy on some people, that;s one thing.

On top of that, despite the fact that the character learns his lesson about being himself and not trying to be anyone else or else all hell will break loose, its ending was EXCEPTIONALLY hokey. If I wanted to rite the hokiest movie on Earth, that's ho I would have done it. Once Saville proves he can mimic a specific sassy African American accent, the joke gets old.

You could probably get away with a similar, less politically-fronted film in the 80's and maybe the 90's, but this was obviously a political movie done by a guy fed up with the millennial world and wanting to say a few things to the teenagers who annoyed him.

Having said that, there are some things I need to say in comparison to other politically-minded movies. I've seen a few political documentaries myself, and I will say that this came as less angry than most. I'm sorry, but I've seen hateful people on both sides of the political spectrum, and I've been treated poorly by them online and in the real world. I don't believe that this movie was "hateful," just annoyed at modern society. Saville's problem is just that he's really annoyed, and it would brush anyone the wrong way. I know because I'm annoyed most of the time.

Other than some of the things he said on radio making some sense, like the bridge scene, let me just say that I know a couple people who lost out to great jobs regardless of higher scores due to minority preference. No one here is saying that minorities shouldn't have jobs, but I think anyone would be upset if they lost out because they were white. It's not a "major economic practice" or some government ploy or anything, but companies have done it before. It would've been nice to see a movie address that issue if it wasn't so preachy and obviously too conservative-minded. Seville tried to handle the discussion carefully and he didn't. He came on too strong.

Somewhere between 15-20 / 100

BTW, my mind immediately goes to how I'd do things differently whenever I watch a movie, so I can rate it better. Basically, the idea behind this is, if a guy who;s never written a movie before just knows he can do a better job, this movie's got a problem. I confess I did that with Loqueesha, too. I've read on a few websites "Loqueesha was made at the wrong time," like Letterboxd which seems to be mostly liberal-central. So I wanna bounce what I thought of off of MoFo, if they'll let me. It'll be less political and less offensive.

Forgive me, but one of my favorite movies is White Chicks, and I always get tempted to make a better version of something.



11 Foreign Language movies to go
Let's talk about the perviness. Do we know how old Emma is meant to be? I don't remember. And frankly it doesn't super matter to me splitting hairs about whether she's 16 or 18 or whatever. The character looks like someone animated a blow-up doll, finding any excuse to shoot her character looking up into her crotch. I mean, very early on she takes a weird lateral step and I was like "Wup, okay. Yup. That was her vulva. Thanks, but no thanks." Things get more overt as they go on (Oh, no! A strange liquid melted off my clothes and now my heaving breasts are bare and I have only this little bikini bottom on!). As the character breathes, her breasts don't just rise and fall to an absurd degree, they, like, pulse? Expand and contract? Anyway, young this woman needs to speak to a doctor. The ickiness of this is slightly alleviated by how crappy the animation is. If I felt like I was looking at realistic bodies, I'd be pretty squicked. But this is like a cheap cut-scene in a video game had their clothing removed.

It really, honestly feels like no one actually cared about what was happening on screen as long as it gave you a chance to ogle the main character (or any of the other porn-bot female characters).
Below is a picture of Jack Foster, the sole creator of The Misty Green Sky - and now I kind of wish it had of been some 14-year-old attempting some kind of early teenage wish-fulfillment. Creepy.

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Other than some of the things he said on radio making some sense, like the bridge scene
I thought that scene was pretty gross. Suicidal thoughts are an attention grab, and the reason people treat you poorly is because you don't love yourself enough?

That woman could have been suicidal because of having lost a baby or having been a victim of an assault or abuse. Lecturing her without knowing why she was thinking about self-harm was incredibly callous.

But, of course, since the writer of the film created the scenario, it's shown to be the right thing.

It's like his advice to the love interest (the one he called a "f*cking idiot"). He says that she's treated badly by men because she enables their bad behaviors. Yeah, that can be true. But some people are in relationships with crappy people and it has nothing to do with enabling.

No one here is saying that minorities shouldn't have jobs, but I think anyone would be upset if they lost out because they were white. It's not a "major economic practice" or some government ploy or anything, but companies have done it before.
When a company puts "women and minorities are encouraged to apply" that usually means that company does not have any significant number of people from those groups and/or that those people have in the past faced discrimination at those kinds of workplaces. When I was in high school, I got a lot of material from the Coast Guard making really specific requests for women to apply--and it wasn't because the Coast Guard was full of ladies!

Also, we watched the main character's audition tape as "himself" and it was awful!

Also, it was two white, middle-aged radio executives (not exactly the progressive forefront if you've spent any time in radio) who loved Loqueesha.

The *sad trombone* idea that the main character was being disregarded because of his gender and race just looked incredibly silly as presented. He clearly was not the more qualified out of the two personas he presented.

Like you say, I think that a film could grapple with contemporary hiring practices and it could be interesting. But the way this film presents the argument is just bizarre.

Below is a picture of Jack Foster, the sole creator of The Misty Green Sky - and now I kind of wish it had of been some 14-year-old attempting some kind of early teenage wish-fulfillment. Creepy.

The film has a strong middle-aged man vibe.





Carnival of Souls, 1998

Alex (Bobbie Phillips) experienced trauma as a child when she caught her mother's boyfriend, Louis (Larry Miller) sexually assaulting and then murdering her mother. Years later Alex is running her mother's old bar, supporting herself and her sister, Sandra (Shawnee Smith). But one day Alex seems to have an encounter with Louis, and from that point on she experiences strange visions and ominous hallucinations.

Oh, the shame, when you type in "Carnival of Souls" to the Tubi search engine and it says, "Hey, so we have these two movies called that, which one did you want?" and you scroll over the 60s version to . . .this.

It's been well over a decade since I've seen this movie, and part of me wondered if it was as bad as I remembered. I has literally only one memory of this movie and that was
WARNING: spoilers below
the implication that a little girl was forced to paint a clown face on a man's penis
, a memory I'd always dismissed as being too ridiculous. Well . . .

Part of what stinks about this movie is that it steals the premise from the 60s film and reimagines it in just the dumbest way possible. After various films from the 70s, 80s, and 90s, the trope of
WARNING: spoilers below
"And they were dead all along!!!!!!!"
is hardly new, but it's done with so little finesse and such an obvious outcome that it sucks the fun out of it.

The acting is unremarkable, without the kind of hammy performance that can at least add a bit of unintentional humor to a crummy film. Larry Miller is a familiar face to anyone who watches Christopher Guest movies. His character of Louis, the child-molesting clown, is certainly upsetting in principal, but there's something off about the kind of menace he seems to be trying to exude and the way that the character is written. Like I've said about many films in this Hall, it's sometimes hard to separate the bad acting from the bad writing. The worst is probably Anna McKown as the girls' mother, Elaine. Elaine just stares semi-vacantly at her viscerally uncomfortable children and then just, you know, leaves one of them alone with Louis. Paul Johansson is on hand as a character who is, what, Death? Like, a sexy Death that you have sex with on his Death boat?

There is one sequence I sort of dug, toward the end, where Alex imagines herself in an oversized version of her childhood bedroom. A balloon appears which then pops and wraps itself around her head. If the rest of the film had been willing to go this direction, it might have been interesting. Instead it just cycles through endless incarnations of Alex seeing visions of Louis or visions of a strange demon.

Just absolutely uninspired, and it doesn't at all earn the bleak ending it presents us with.




I did say "some" sense. Really it was the convincing her not to kill herself that did it for me. Other than that, I wasn't a fan of how he could practically mind-read. But I'm glad we're on the same page of a movie about contemporary hiring practices. In the case of two white guys hiring Loqueesha, it's no surprise that there are company owners who find some morale or marketing potential in the practice, so no matter what their skin color was, the practice comes as no surprise. It's not "evil," it's just not "perfect." Then again, most good things aren't.

The real issue with the fimmaking perspective is that a plot about economics probably needs to be handled less like an argument and more like a dramedy.

Watching Airplane Mode right now. I thought I would hate it, but the middle act has some funny moments.



I did say "some" sense. Really it was the convincing her not to kill herself that did it for me.
I guess.

I mean, it was written that she'd be like "Oh yeah! You're right!". Also loved how apparently when he was done neither of them actually stayed on the line with her.

To hear someone say they want to kill themselves and say "Do it!" is just such a sociopath move. The fact that the writer couldn't apparently be bothered to, like, Google how to help someone who is threatening self-harm is nuts to me. There's an alternate version of Loqueesha where she goes on trial a la that girl who told her boyfriend to kill himself.



I think that was more of a "shock-value building up to the end" thing more than anything.

Airplane Mode

Like a lot of other comedies, this movie is a pack of Ben and Jerry's ice cream. There's a lot in there and it's just packed with no air in between, so maybe that's why this flavor never took flight. Joke after sex joke after joke after sex joke, the majority of this movie is either unfunny or just gross. Having said that, there were a few times I cracked up, but I don't want to ruin that. But whatever story it's going for is severely half-assed, despite occasionally having some chuckle-worthy moments because of that fact, like the final resolution with Jenna and her old boyfriend. So, dumb comedy with a few gags, nothing more.

3/10



WARNING: spoilers below
"Candy... Beautiful name, it has the spirit, the sound of the Old Testament."


This is gonna be so much fun.



11 Foreign Language movies to go


The Misty Green Sky - 2016

Directed by Jack Foster

Written by Jack Foster

Starring Tiffany Lindstrom, Jeremy Harkless & Maggie H. Taylor

This is bad - in so many ways. First of all - The Misty Green Sky should not be available on Amazon Prime to buy or rent. It doesn't meet the professional standard any person would rightly expect when paying for film content - and it doesn't even come close to it. The "film" has been created by one man, Jack Foster, by way of Daz 3D and Poser, with characters and animations cribbed directly from those applications. That's right, the director of The Misty Green Sky hasn't even done his own animating, and all of the hairstyles and costumes have also been provided him from those sources as well. Even so, the entire work feels unfinished, glitchy and very rough around the edges. If you're not bothered by that, then perhaps the fact that Foster has gone the "erotic sci-fi" route will - especially since he's used young teenage girls to overtly sexualize. The way he does it deeply concerns me, and if there was any one person from which I thought the police should be checking the hard drives on their computers, it would be this Jack Foster - whose name simply couldn't be his own.

Emma, a young schoolgirl, has lessons while living in a compound on what she thinks is Earth - her teacher a humanoid entity called 'God' who warns her never to wander over to the "old village" (an abandoned set of ruins) outside the compound's outer boundary. Emma's curiosity is far too strong however, and she searches the ruins and finds a secret that shocks her - she's not on Earth at all, but a planet called Rythar, which was once touted a paradise. To find out more, she purposely gets a job loading transport ships, and stows away on one - hitching a ride to a space station which orbits her planet. She discovers that the station is one large medical facility, with scientists working on a specific disease - but why is it in orbit around Rythar? When those on the station find out about Emma, panic ensues, and in the chaotic events that follow the entire station is destroyed, with only Emma managing to free herself of the catastrophe to find herself an escape ship which will take her to Earth. While on the ship, Emma discovers the devastating secret about herself, Rythar and what she's done.

Jack Foster's creation, Emma, has large breasts (as do all the females on Rythar) and appears to be approximately 16-years-old. His most favourite way of presenting her is from a low angle so we get a good view up her shorts - aided by the way she often falls over giving us glimpses of her genitals. He thinks up as many excuses as he can for baring her breasts - or those of her cohabitants on the planet - at one stage having her clothes somehow disintegrate when sprayed with a mystery substance on the transport ship to the space station. This result is a near-nude Emma exploring the station's confines. He's also done something very peculiar to the breasts of all the girls in the film - they kind of pulsate - they expand and contract, as if Foster is under the impression that breasts and lungs are the same thing. It strikes the viewer as bizarre for this to be happening - unnatural, distracting and puzzling. Too fast and too great to be breathing. The animation is sketchy enough as it is (Foster loves to have his creations simply glide through space - making everything much easier) - it doesn't need this added strange effect to further distance it from normality.

Aside from those drop dead obvious aspects to what has gone wrong, there are hundreds of small errors that needed cleaning up. All of the perspectives are wrong - when Emma's transport ship appears from over the horizon of the planet Rythar it appears to be far too large, which would make the ship nearly as big as the planet itself. This happens again when we see the space station escape ship appear through the rings of Saturn - from the distance we see it, through the rings, the escape ship must be as big as Earth itself. Another strange occurrence is Emma's constant change of clothes and hairstyles - clothes can be explained, but why does Emma's hair change from scene to scene? Even if hairstyles can be changed as easily as profile pictures on the internet in the future, would you really change your own hairstyle three or four times a day? Everything that's written in the film uses the same cheap 'Impact' font, which is just lazy and unforgiveable for someone making an animated film they expected to be distributed and paid for.

The sound effects have obviously been taken directly from typing "sound effects" into Google and using one of a plethora of sites which provide them - they don't fully mesh, and give another example of the lazy and amateur construction that produced this effort. Same goes for the public domain pieces of music. Animation-wise, the background moves at a different rate to the could-patterns on the sky, making the viewer disorientated if they're watching that. Effects like fire are sometimes cut off mid-effect - an egregious error, even for a film that would be free on YouTube, let alone paid content on a streaming service. The voice acting is flat and unappealing - and the script they read from is rife with logical inconsistencies and dialogue that sounds trite. When stating that the colony they live on has a "70 to 30 female to male ratio" is should either be a 7 to 3 female to male ratio or else the entire compound has a population of 70 females and 30 males - the way it's said sounds silly. It also makes no sense for Emma to be surprised that some guy has hooked up with another girl if it's common knowledge that this is a polygamist society. These things have to make sense. Facial expressions never work for the entirety of the film.

Jack Foster (whose real name is probably closer to Jayse Feedlebreem) set up an account on Indiegogo.com to raise money for what he said would be an animated sci-fi trilogy of films (I can't wait for the next two.) He managed to raise $285 for his budget - and I expect this is far closer to the real budget for this film than the $50,000 the IMDb estimated. His Hollywood Rocks! documentary from 2008 hasn't been seen by many people (I can't find evidence of a single one) and when you watch the trailer for it you find it more interested in really grimy sex anecdotes than music - every quote you hear relates to these rockers having intercourse with groupies and nobody mentions anything much else, aside from drugs and maybe one reference to music. Whatever's lower than trash - then that's what Hollywood Rocks! is. The only other directorial effort from Foster is 2010's White Lion Concert Anthology 1987 to 1991, and it's something else that has absolutely no internet footprint. Letterboxd lists Three Dramas from 2020 as a Jack Foster-directed piece of work. It has accrued one "watched" logged to it, and one rating by a viewer - and that rating was a half star - the lowest possible.


Jack Foster's smutty Hollywood Rocks! failed to live up to it's billing as entertainment.

The Misty Green Sky throws up a lot of strange elements, which are the only entertainment we can glean from it as we're slowly tortured by a low-tech kind of boredom. When a robot directly copied from the Cybermen in Doctor Who plays Emma a classical piano tune, a gorilla slowly lifts the robot up from underneath - and it's as random and meaningless as you can get. A rotating gorilla holding up a Cyberman from Doctor Who who is playing classical piano for Emma? That's The Misty Green Sky for you. My personal favourite moment though, was the screaming woman on the space station - whose run and scream can only be seen to understand what I'm getting at. As a single moment, it outstripped all others (pun kind of intended.) This animated effort throws in many bizarre and incongruous things. Was it worth watching? Of course not. Only a crazy person would go out of their way to watch The Misty Green Sky, but once seen, it provides much to think about. Jack Foster's hard drive, which would probably land him 30 years. The fact that Amazon Prime is charging non-subscribers to watch or own it - which really cheapens Amazon Prime in my eyes. The gall - of releasing someone's animated doodles as if it's worthy of being called a "film". Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm off to call 1-800-PREVENT to report a probable sex offender.