The year 2022 in film - Ranked.

Seen 16. I'm a fraud.

Hayley and James have been seeing each other secretly for a few months and when they are departing on different trains to go home for Christmas, they both get the bright idea to surprise the other by switching trains. Confusion and comedy ensue when they realize that the other had the same bright idea and now they must spend Christmas with each other's family.

A funny enough idea that could lead to some real laughs, but instead we get stupid characters making stupid decisions that cross lines. I would never in a million years go into a room that I was told not to (when I'm a guest) and then proceed to redecorate the entire house for the Holidays. This dumb idea leads to a missing dog and shouting matches. What?

So the families don't know their children are dating and the cover is that they're friends. This is something that has been done before, and nothing new or exciting pops up here. In terms of generic rom-coms, it's hard to make them work when the characters spend 90% of the time apart. The chemistry does not come through and I found myself wondering if I should even root for these kids to stay together.

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"A laugh can be a very powerful thing. Why, sometimes in life, it's the only weapon we have."

Suspect's Reviews

Man, comic book movies did not do well this year.

The "origin" story of anti-hero Black Adam, a man given godly powers thousands of years ago who was imprisoned. In the present, he is freed in the hopes of destroying the regime that holds the city of Kahndaq with an iron fist. He uses harsh violence to deal with these people and a team of superheroes must try to stop him.

This movie tells the same flashback story three separate times, but it's more like the ending of the movie Clue. "This is what happened, but this is what really happens...but THIS is how it REALLY happened!!!" This frame of storytelling wouldn't be bad per-say, but there needs to be some element of mystery to it, am I wrong? There is no real mystery here, or if the filmmakers think there is one, it's one we do not care about. The minute a character shows up on screen and we never see their face, we know something is up and they are not who we think they are.

Black Aadam wastes the heroes from the Justice Society. There is supposed to be some kind of history of friendship between Hawkman and Doctor Fate, but that is done in voice-over and we never really feel their bromance. This hurts later scenes that are manufactured to give us some kind of emotional response to character actions, but the film never reaches those requirements. I will give those two actors credit (Pierce Brosnan as Doctor Fate and Aldis Hodge as Hawkman) they do good work, but there is no depth to their characters. Two other members of the team are newcomers and simply try to learn the ropes.

The Rock glares, says little, and mean mugs the camera. He WANTS to be the big superhero star in this universe, but I just don't see it. The action sequences are tediously lame and unfortunately follow the Zack Snyder God-Speed style of Man of Steel. I couldn't care for any of the characters, why they were doing what they were doing or how.

Black Adam has an after-credits stinger that is comical now considering the current state of the DCEU.

I felt that Deep Water was more original than some of Lyne's worst works, like Flashdance and 9 1/2 Weeks. Out of his 9 movies, this is his third worst.

Went to 108 different films at the cinema in 2022, including re-releases.

Interestingly, of the first 9 you've listed, only 3 (Morbius, Death on the Nile & Black Adam) had a theatrical release here in UK (or at least at the cinema that I frequent) and just as curious how many films were released here but not there.

Will be interested to see how much these trends continues...

The rest of the films listed went straight to streaming.

Christmas Bloody Christmas - Shudder

Cheaper by the Dozen, No Exit - Disney

Deep Water, TCM, Your Christmas or Mine - Netflix

Not something I plan to revisit every holiday.

Star Lord is feeling blue about Christmas, so Mantis and Drax take it upon themselves to gift him earth hero Kevin Bacon.

The concept is funny and some of the jokes work, but overall this felt like a dud. There was something about the "spirit" of Christmas that was missing. I much prefer the other Marvel one-off Werewolf by Night and I guess I'm in the minority here because everyone else I've talked to really liked this entry.

Pom Klementieff's Mantis saves most of this as her charm and childlike demeanour was joyous to watch. Bautista continues to play Drax as he did in the original, which is funny, but ultimately shallow.

Two outcasts connect over their love of music. Hunter loves heavy metal and gives a crash course lesson on the genre to Kevin so they can win the battle of the bands. When a talented Cello player arrives, Kevin wants to do other things than 'just play music'. This is something that Hunter simply cannot allow.

This film feels a little too 'light-hearted' for the type of music it plays. Everything about it feels like it was done by people who possibly don't know the music that well. This is, of course, just my impression of the film, they could be devoted fans of the genre. But they are referencing people from bands that even I know and I'm not really into metal.

The friendship between Kevin and Hunter is not a healthy one. Hunter verbally abuses Kevin every time he doesn't want to play the music. This made it particularly hard to root for his goals, which is what the film is driving towards.

The music was decent and if you love music-centric films, this one won't feel like a complete waste of time, but there are indeed better ones out there.

A group of young kids is sent to an LGBTQ+ conversion camp. They are subjected to verbal abuse and degrading torment, but things get worse when a killer stalks the grounds.

Brilliant title. Is a title so good that the film could not live up to it and it completely misses the mark for its...well intentions?

They / Them is disappointingly directionless and inadvertently offensive. What could have been a clever take on the genre with honest representation, feels like a lampooning characterization and is a flat-out crappy slasher. People going into this movie expecting a slasher flick will be disappointed as the film doesn't seem to care about that aspect of the story. We open with a kill, then nothing happens from the slasher story until the end.

There are a few tone-deaf moments; one that jumps out immediately was when the kids arrived at the camp. Kevin Bacon, who runs the camp, lays the rules down and is extremely friendly. He says boys' cabins on the right and girls' cabins on the left. The group split up between boys and girls. All except one person who stands in the middle and says what about me? I don't identify as either boy or a girl, where do I sleep? A beat you over the head moment that doesn't get across what I hope were honest good intentions.

Another character wakes up early to have a shower alone and is confronted by a counselor when they "lied" about their gender. They are immediately sent to the other genders living quarters.

The film has cringy moments of singing and eye-rolling moments of surprise. It feels pretty obvious who the killer is and you feel frustrated when the film stalls with those sequences. They / Them has tame kills, on-the-nose moments, and feels dull.

Great title though...

Dang Suspect. Our only overlap so far is Guardians Christmas. Definitely the worst thing I saw this year. I knew better than to turn it on, but still, just dreadfully dumb.

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Letterboxd

A 'What If' movie that plays both scenarios out at the same time.

While graduating college Natalie decides to knock boots with a friend. Then she gets sick the following days..uh oh...does that mean she is pregnant? That's when the story splits into two. One timeline follows her life if she were pregnant and the other follows her if she wasn't.

Lili Reinhart of Riverdale fame plays the lead role and does a decent job of making me believe in her, in both situations. The concept is interesting but leans too hard into the stereotypes of both lives. This makes whatever point the film is trying to make a bit shallow.

It doesn't seem to shame one life or the other and both have their pros and cons when it comes to her decisions. I do wish for more moments with the parents though, they were funny and had good chemistry, played by Luke Wilson and Andrea Savage.

It's a good concept film, with generic execution. Something you might like on a rainy day, but ultimately forgettable by the next morning.

Because you don't watch trash Sean, I do that for everyone!!!

Much like High Tension, Don't Worry Darling is a film that seems to be pretty good until you get to the final reveal and everything falls apart, rather quickly.

In the 1950's, housewife Alice seems to be having the time of her life. Her husband pleasures her, her friends love her and she lives in a beautiful utopia. Yet strange things start happening around her and when she questions what her husband is doing at work, she is quickly shut down. When another housewife dies by suicide, her world is turned upside down and she discovers not everything is as beautiful as it seems.

In her follow-up to the much-loved Book Smart, Wilde has given us an ambitious project that suffered from a lot of scrutiny leading up to its release. Unfair criticism of course, but with her on the defensive, she tries to explain things away that leaves a sour taste in my mouth by the end of this movie.

The performances are fine and the best scene in the film is one where people sit down at a dinner table and challenge each other with conversation. The cinematography is gorgeous and it was a little fun trying to peel away at the mystery that it presents. Then the reveal sidelines everything.



A big miss for me, despite the talent involved. I'm still interested in seeing what Wilde does next. She just needs to try and tell a good story and not one-up herself.

I think I liked Don’t Worry Darling more than you, but I didn’t love it and your criticism is valid. I thought it would go more interesting places than it ultimately did. Pugh was great though, and Pine was fun. That dinner scene is certainly the highlight.

Oh, ok. I wasn't counting direct to streaming just at the cinema, so will be keeping that in mind.

Yet to see any. Death on the Nile the closest thing I almost watched.

TUS, I can tag all this stuff for the review section, but I need ratings dropped into the posts.

Thanks, and good work so far!

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Out of the ones I've seen...

Texas Chainsaw Massacre was not very good as a whole, but I have a strange respect for certain aspects of it - it certainly delivers on the violence, the cracks at millennials and zoomers aren't altogether terrible, and the way in which it gleefully subverts the re-introduction of Sally Hardesty in a way that seems designed to poke fun at how the recent Halloween sequels brought back Laurie Strode

Black Adam...of course, Morbius and Thor: Love and Thunder beat it out for the title of this year's worst superhero movie, but this one certainly gives it the old college try. A lot of that is down to how much Johnson tried to hype it up as the next big thing for the genre and, while there's certainly potential to its whole "ancient superhero was really a supervillain" setup, he's just not the man for the job and the resulting film struggles to do much to justify itself beyond being a feature-length sizzle reel for the assumed next phase of a now-scuppered cinematic universe.

GOTG Holiday Special...between this and The Suicide Squad, I'm definitely inclined to think Gunn has expended whatever superhero juice he managed to summon for those first two GOTG movies and now this, much like The Star Wars Holiday Special itself, reads like a largely charmless exercise in contractual obligations where even the overtly campy and distinctive elements don't do much to save it. Pom Klementieff innocent, though.

Don't Worry Darling's worst crime is that it's just so boring. The notorious press tour suggested the trainwreck of the year but the end result was extremely bland as far as these high-concept fiascos go.

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Iro's Top 100 Movies v3.0

After the death of her mother, Evie feels alone in this world. On a whim, she does a 23 and me type DNA kit and submits it online. She then quickly receives a message from someone claiming to be a long lost cousin. They meet up and he tells her that she must join him for a wedding in England. The entire family is dying to meet her, all expenses would be paid. She agrees and soon falls for the Lord of the Manor. The bride and groom seem nowhere to be found and the hired help starts disappearing one by one. What's really going on here?

I don't know if people know the reveal of this film or not, I remember the trailers being pretty open about it. I feel like the font of the title alone should be a clue as to what Evie has to deal with here.

The Invitation is fine. Nothing to write home about, until the underwhelming climax and shoddy CGI bog the rest of the film down. The film does a decent job of building genuine suspense with nice tension and slow dread. The film only has one or two "jump" scares. Nathalie Emmanuel does well enough in the role, but others feel stiff.

The film has no surprises, which is a shame and everything after the wedding is laughably bad. All this build up for nothing but a few seconds of fighting and bad green screen. I didn't feel the risks at all and there was no point that I felt she was in any real danger. What started off as a promising addition to the genre, flakes out during what should be an exciting final.

I don't even want to talk about the tacked on ending that is so bad and obvious that it was shot months later.

Done.