Rate The Last Movie You Saw

Tools    





I have no clue what he wants me to do to him with the glowstick.. and I hate pickles...
This had me laughing actually. Love how you end it with "...and I hate pickles". Perfect.

As for the glowstick? Ironically enough, why not stick it where the sun don't shine? and, uh, you know Glasgow, right? Now how about gasglow? Now that's far more interesting I can tell ya.

Okay. Too much. I better sleep now...



There's nothing wrong with Drill Bill
Oh young Cole... you are to young for me to discuss something that straight men enjoy... ok Im shutting up... NOW!



There's nothing wrong with Drill Bill
Drill Bill never fails to show his face (except for the end of the film maybe)

Get ready for the Drill Bill Take Over! #DrillingOverload



Master of My Domain
Oh young Cole... you are to young for me to discuss something that straight men enjoy... ok Im shutting up... NOW!
Two words: Sex ed.

The realistic version, not textbook.



Two words: Sex ed.

The realistic version, not textbook.
Gats you are too young to know about it too!....



The director was masturbating in front of a mirror with blood as lube for the entirety of this film. At least that's how I saw it.
Sounds interesting.



Welcome to the human race...
*reads the last few pages of this thread*



But anyway...

Pat Garrett and Billy the Kid -


I remember a few years back when UK film magazine Total Film put out a list of their top 100 movies and ranked this at #32 (for comparison's sake, look at what kind of films got ranked even lower - including The Wild Bunch at #77). It's not bad or anything but...well, when I get around to reviewing it I guess you'll know.
__________________
I really just want you all angry and confused the whole time.
Iro's Top 100 Movies v3.0





I did not have much high hopes for this since I was disappointed by The Third Man. This one however was great! And is now my new favorite British film! And another fantastic Noir!




_____ is the most important thing in my life…


Better Living Through Chemistry

Sam Rockwell as you've seen him many times before. Fairly uneven, even for me. Borderline ridiculous to serious to miracle ending. Enjoyable.

Extra credit for what sounded like kids doing a cover of Shimmy-Shimmy-Ya.





p.e.

I have developed a taste for using captions. There was a narrator during this movie and each time
WARNING: spoilers below
she spoke, it said Fonda, as in Jane Fonda.
The significance was lost on me, because knowing that didn't play in the film...and how would you know if it was her or a character without the captions to begin with. First time I have ever seen something like this in a movie.



The Devil's Rejects (2005) - Rob Zombie

- Dude this movie is so badass and the characters are so lovable. I love every single part of this flick and all the soundtracks are da*m awesome. That ending with the song ''Free Bird'' is one of my favorite ever. This movie and House Of 1000 Corpses are truly underrated and are great flick. LOVE IT.
+
__________________
''Haters are my favourite. I've built an empire with the bricks they've thrown at me... Keep On Hating''
- CM Punk
http://threemanbooth.files.wordpress...unkshrug02.gif





THE EVIL DEAD

(Sam Raimi, 1981)

I meant to write a review for this -- I never did. This actually wasn't the "last movie" I watched. But I just wanted to say that I enjoyed it.

Attachments
Click image for larger version

Name:	ED.JPG
Views:	758
Size:	28.0 KB
ID:	22319  



Troy: Director's Cut
(2007)

Watching this movie, I've learned that I'll never understand film criticism. Ever. I've been watching movies for a long time, but I'd still find myself having the most divisive views from professional critics alike, including my defense of Alien 3: Assembly Cut and Troy: Director's Cut.

First off, I want to be clear that Troy isn't really a mind-blowing masterpiece, especially if it's compared to the original tale it's inspired from (not based upon - this is an important detail people often missed), Homer's Iliad. But as a standalone film, it works, specifically the Director's Cut. It has very exciting sword-fights, it's as well-shot as a big-scale production spectacle like Independence Day, and most importantly, its characters and character arcs are well-rounded, the last point being the reason why the film never felt lengthy for me despite its 196 minutes running time. Almost every scene felt important in furthering character development or furthering its theme. And what is its theme? The nihilism of Greek mythology. Here's my own interpretation of the film.

WARNING: "Story Spoilers" spoilers below
Troy is a brutal criticism on the pointlessness of faith, honor, religion, and warfare. It's ultimately a tale of fools. The absence of fantasy elements in the movie was criticized and terribly misunderstood, when said absence actually has a point to it, to show that the Trojan priests who blindly worshiped gods that we never see are as foolish as the Greek soldiers who fought for an honor that's as meaningless as their blind faith. Both the priests and the soldiers were driven by abstract ideals into making some very foolish decisions. Paris' (Orlando Bloom) honor, for example, has as much meaning as his supposed love for Helen of Sparta (Diane Kruger), when he cowardly ran from the fight against Menelaus (Brendan Gleeson) despite proclaiming earlier that he'd die for Helen. Where's the honor in that?

Furthermore, Paris' revenge for Hector (Eric Bana) seemed to have been done out of obligation, not out of his love for his brother. After giving Achilles (Brat Pitt) the killing strikes, Paris witnessed Briseis (Rose Byrne) holding onto Achilles, the man she loved, the same way he would have held Helen, yet Paris showed no emotions and was clearly indifferent towards Briseis' feelings of love as he tried to drag her away. It might have been due to Orlando Bloom's poor acting, but it works in showing Paris' inability to understand love. Paris' capability of processing Briseis' love pragmatically like an emotionless robot was due to his ignorance towards the true value of love as his brother had foretold, much like the Greeks' ignorance towards the true value of honor. They claimed to kill for honor, and yet they rape the Trojans' wives like honorless men. And on that note, yes, the excessive violence has a point in the story too. Greek tragedies are usually violent, and in this case, it's to show how hypocritical these men and their ideals really are. For all their violent pursuits of glory, they (including Achilles) will ironically not be remembered as heroes, but as savages who rape women and kill each other for senseless vengeance. They are as terrible as the gods they worship.

I was initially mildly concerned as well about Wolfgang Petersen's more realistic take on what was essentially a mythological world. I had thought that Aphrodite's Golden Apple would have added more context to Achilles' criticism of the Greek gods, whom as most of you might know, were complete a-holes. For those of you who don't know, Aphrodite was one of three goddesses competing for the Golden Apple of Discord, one that says "To the most beautiful". Paris was chosen for his fairness to be the judge of the one who shall earn the Apple. To gain Paris' favor, Aphrodite offered him Helen of Sparta as a gift, thus triggering the Trojan War. The changes here might seem appalling to the fans of the original tale, but I'm going to call 'blinded fanboyism' on this one. The rewritten story works without my knowledge of the literature, which is no more sacred than a Marvel comic book (look how faithful those Marvel movies turned out to be). While I admit that an exploration of the foolishness of men as they are manipulated by terrible gods would have made an interesting story, I don't really see how this variation is a more terrible retelling as well.

In fact, Petersen's avoidance from using fantasy elements, including any telltale signs that Achilles was in fact invulnerable like some kind of ancient Superman, was a stroke of genius. It's to further the belief that any character's mentioning of "seeing god" might have been a symbolic expression and nothing else. In this age of mysticism, we see these fools fought among themselves for gods, for honor, for love - none of which hold true in the end. The gods' existence was disproven by the Trojan Horse (ironically, it's supposed to be a tribute to the sea god, Poseidon), the love was disproven by Paris' indifference towards Briseis' love for another man, and the honor was disproven when those men began humping the Trojan wives in the middle of the street. The reality of man's terrible nature sets in among their foolish ideals. And you know what's the worst part? Paris passed on such ignorance and idealism onto the next generation, Aeneas, when he gave him the Sword of Troy, something that practically didn't help Paris at all when he fought Menelaus. So much for all that spiritual nonsense about the Sword bearing some mystical power.

The best part of the movie is that it never hammers the audience with its criticism of blind faith. Rather than spending its time preaching about philosophy, it often focuses on character relationships and how those relationships affect them and the people around them. More importantly, it shows the philosophy through the characters' foolish actions, not through expositions or preaches. Show, not tell. The best example of this is when the soldiers ransacked the temple and destroyed the idols. Priam (Peter O'Toole') shouted in rebellion, "Have you no honor?!" right before he was backstabbed by Agamemnon (Brian Cox) in the very place where he worshiped his all-powerful gods.

When Priam asked Agamemnon to spare the innocent children, he spatted in his face, telling him "Nobody's innocent. Nobody." And indeed, nobody was. Paris started this war for love he never understood, Hector accidentally killed Achilles' cousin when he followed Priam's foolish commands of ambushing the retreating Greek soldiers, Achilles' pursuit of glory left him ended up being remembered not for his heroic deeds but for the weakness in his heels, and so on and so forth. They are all embroiled in an honorless world where backstabbing and sneak attacks hold the true power, not gods, not honor, not love. It's a vicious cycle they'll not be getting out for as long as the Sword is passed on.

The movie's 'epic' quote from Iliad is laughable in hindsight. "If they ever tell my story let them say that I walked with giants. Men rise and fall like the winter wheat, but these names will never die. Let them say I lived in the time of Achilles, the guy who took an arrow in his heel." Giants indeed.

(Well-told epic)
Enjoyability: High



Care for some gopher?
Jodaeiye Nader az Simin A Separation (IRN, 2011, Asghar Farhadi) -


I don't think i've ever heard a single negativ word about this movie. Everyone seems to love it, so my expactations were pretty high and i doubted that this movie will meet those expactations. But, boy, it did! I absolutely loved it! It seemed highly authentic, the acting was great and i especially loved how there's no one wrong or the bad guy.
__________________
"Gentlemen, you can't fight in here. This is the war room."



Thor (2011)



It all felt fake. The character designs were terrible. I don't know if the armors on the main characters were made of metal, but they sure don't look like they were. I would not complain about this but considering how much money was spent on CGI in this movie, they could have made an effort and spared a few more bucks on the real stuff.

The CGI itself looks very expensive indeed but it doesn't mean it looks good. It's oversaturized and there's too much glow to it. It looks just like what it is - fake. If you're going to spend that much money on that stuff why don't you make it look convincing?

I talked about the stuff that's usually of secondary importance first because the movie's primary objective is, clearly, to feed our eyes more than our minds but still, let's talk about the rest of the stuff.

So, acting - again, the "let's just throw money at it" strategy transpired. Story - simple, just an excuse for scenes with stuff blowing up, really. Music - there's nothing wrong with it but the main theme is literally like 5 notes repeated over and over again.

Overall, it's one of those movies which treat its audience like a bunch of morons who don't care about any other aspect of the movie as long as stuff goes boom, the actors are attractive, and the special effects look cool.

Thor is designed to cater to the most primitive desires of the most primitive moviegoers.

Don't get me wrong, I like Marvel movies. Just not this one.


__________________
Check out my blog: Yasashii's Retro Game Playground



Sorry if I'm rude but I'm right
I don't think i've ever heard a single negativ word about this movie. Everyone seems to love it
I know a guy who hated it.
__________________
Look, I'm not judging you - after all, I'm posting here myself, but maybe, just maybe, if you spent less time here and more time watching films, maybe, and I stress, maybe your taste would be of some value. Just a thought, ya know.



Winchester '73 (1950)


From the top 100 Westerns list, and with an IMDb rating of 7.8, and 100% at Rotten Tomatoes, this is a highly thought of movie. I love Jimmy Stewart, and the first 20 minutes were promising, but I thought the rest of the movie was extremely average.