Happy birthday Sexy Celebrity!

I just thought to myself - how long is it all gonna last?

I looked at everybody doing so much work on the forum - the countdowns, JayDee with his movie reviews that are practically each a novel, everyone else who has done almost 1,000 reviews.

And I felt.... why keep doing it if one day it's all just gonna be lost? Why not try to focus on something else..... more important?

I mean, there's good reason to do it..... I certainly enjoyed doing it.... I miss hearing that voice that came out of me, because it's not something that just comes out of me all the time. You have to channel it. Like calling a spirit. Writing is very athletic. Mentally. What I did was a lot of training. I am sad the training isn't there on display anymore. But.... I worried it was all gonna go away eventually, anyway. And I'm sure it will. There are millions of movie reviews on the internet. Many being written every second. There's a lot of chatter out there. It's like a big communications system, a brain, neurons talking to each other, whatever. My little station just decided to go off the air for awhile. But.... who knows? There could always be a new station, new chatter, new information.

Second: the reason to do it is that you, or someone else, gets joy out of it. Maybe you really like writing reviews. Or people love reading them. If that happens, then it almost doesn't matter how long it stays up. If you post something funny, and you make people laugh and feel a little better...isn't that a good reason to do it, even if all of it vanishes a minute later? They still laughed. They still felt better. You still did that.

I just started feeling more and more that my voice didn't need to be heard. That I wasn't.... "in vogue" or something. So, I thought..... okay. I can step down. I can let other people have the microphone. It doesn't kill me. I'm nobody special.

There were people going around acting crazy over things I said, especially when I joked around. I did not feel wanted. I was only trying to help people, that has always been my mission. Help myself, too. When I stopped feeling like I couldn't do those things, I dunno, I didn't see a reason to be here. I don't want to be a burden. I don't want to make trouble. I just wanted to give something to the world that it was missing. Even now, I feel like I'm doing that. I don't attempt to do what's already been done. I attempt to create things that are new and that people will appreciate and make a part of their life. I wanted to be a co-creator of the forum in a way. Yoda made the house, but I wanted to decorate certain rooms. Because I figured the house could have an endless amount of rooms. I'm not really about limitations. I am as vast and open as the entire universe. There's simply a reason why everything exists. Otherwise, it wouldn't be there in the first place.

Well, I wasn't entirely proud of all of my reviews, either. I honestly .... kinda wish I had taken a different approach to the whole thing. Perhaps even something less..... wacky.

I know you're in an unusual situation now, but isn't it only midday Thursday in Oz?

It's been the most complex year here for me at Movie Forums. On the good side, I finally won Survivor. On the negative side.... lots.

I'm really sorry for all the trouble I've caused. I hope you'll still treat me like one of the family. I think that I need to work on getting back on track here because I definitely got off.

Thank you, everybody!

It's been the most complex year here for me at Movie Forums. On the good side, I finally won Survivor. On the negative side.... lots.

I'm really sorry for all the trouble I've caused. I hope you'll still treat me like one of the family. I think that I need to work on getting back on track here because I definitely got off.

Thank you, everybody!

Well, I wasn't entirely proud of all of my reviews, either. I honestly .... kinda wish I had taken a different approach to the whole thing. Perhaps even something less..... wacky.

I did the exact same thing I deleted all of my posts in the 13th Hall of Fame thread then immediately regretted it. That thread makes no sense now for like 50 pages and with my deleted posts it would be by far the longest Hall of Fame.

"Feeding" each other Reps feels kinda gay.

Just don't rep your own alternate accounts, that's how you breed in weakness.