Pitch an awful movie that would make a ton of money

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Hellloooo Cindy - Scary Movie (2000)
The sequel to Spielberg’s Minority report starring a CGI Tom Cruise and Melissa McCarthy. CGI Cruise uncovers some information surrounding his missing son relating to a prisoner (McCarthy) he previously arrested for pre crime murder. She is newly released as pre crime has been disbanded. Cruise teams up with her after some convincing in a bid to find his son. Hilarity ensues as McCarthy bumbles around a different world after being imprisoned for 20 + years. It’s a fish out of water comedy with a satirical take on our world. The twist at the end of the film is that McCarthy is Cruises son but due to a dimensional portal between Cruises world and the Marvel Universe,Cruises son is sent back in time and his gender is changed. CGI Cruise now enters the portal and forms a new life for himself in the Marvel extended universe with many sequels to come.

I could do these all day lol.



Justin Bieber: Truth Or Dare part 2



Just like in Madonnas 1991 Rockumentary, the camera follows the Biebs around at work, at play, among friends, and his music! Oh the music would be all new Justin Bieber stuff!

Worldwide gross - 1 Billion Dollars



Welcome to the human race...
I was going to ask why so many of these answers involve Melissa McCarthy and then I remembered that earlier in this thread I pointed out how her films tended to be financially successful. I totally played myself here.
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I really just want you all angry and confused the whole time.
Iro's Top 100 Movies v3.0



How about a movie with a bunch of little kids who all curse their heads off? They can talk about sex and stuff. Adult movie audiences love it when kids curse, make lewd gestures, and talk about age-inappropriate topics! Lots of shots of toddlers giving the finger and looking at internet porn! Maybe we can get Seth Rogen and the "Frat Pack" on board?

The Little %#$&%* Rascals?

(Remember... these are awful ideas that would make money!)



Garbage Fire: The Movie

Directed by The Russo Brothers

Starring: Nobody

Synopsis: An extended take of a garbage fire for two hours. It is, however, marketed as being in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

Estimated Gross: $1 billion
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A man's got to know his limitations.



We've gone on holiday by mistake
Titanic 2.0

Starring Kate Winslet and Leonardo De Caprio

Plot- Rose head's back to England on another ship before disaster strikes, and wouldn't you know it but Jack's long lost identitical twin is on the ship too........................

estimated gross-$ 25 billion dollars
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Flappy Bird: The Movie

Starring: John Krasinski as Flapp E. Bird

Plot: A dark reboot of the Flappy Bird saga, with the world having been taken over by the vicious terrorist group known as "The Pipes". Only Bird, a former Marine with the capability of jetpack travel, can save the world.

Estimated gross: $957 million



Welcome to the human race...
Green Room 2

A struggling skinhead band get trapped in a San Francisco punk bar and must fight their way through an army of anarcho-communists led by Ian McKellen. President Trump sings its praises by declaring it "a wake-up call", "important", and "mandatory viewing for all citizens".



3rd Rock From The Sun: The Movie


It would however have a total recasting but the characters would be the same ones (like they did with that recent Dad's Army movie), no humour at all, obviously... and would revolve around the aliens knowing all about Earth customs after the years they've spent here in the TV show.
The mission now is that their High Commander is going to invade, but the foursome are against it and there's a huge epic Independence Day style invasion.


Michael Bay to direct, Paul WS Anderson writing.


Edit: Adrian Paul off Highlander TV Series would play Dick Solomon.



We've gone on holiday by mistake
Castaway II: the Wilson Chronicles

you win



I have an idea for a movie a Guy buys a Darth Vader Helmet and Face mask only he paints it Cherry Red and He dresses up in Football Pads and makes a black cape. He uses two shock sticks at first and beats up school bullies on his list by shocking them. He is arrested by cops and says nothing. The nerdy father of 4 decides not too speak too anyone. He finishes his costume by making A better bullet Proof armor for his chest and shoulders and becomes The Red Vader.
He buys Two Ninja Swords and trains with them and buys Two 44 Magnum Pistols and A Solid Steel Ax. He makes a list and kills all who are on his list. He leaves the families the heart of his victums in the mail box.

His only weakness is a cute nerdy Game Of Thrones Fan Who was a waitress at a diner. She dresses up like Cersei at home every night. The Nerdy Vader Kidnaps her and tortures her with shock theropy until she is mind controled by him and now she is Lady Maul and They Go On killing until they are shot to death trying to rob a bank late.



The thing isolated becomes incomprehensible
It doesn't matter how I pitch it, you just don't mess with some franchises...
The problem with Ghost Busters is not the all-female cast. It's that a remake/sequel/spin off of Ghost Busters would always go wrong!



I also dont think it was an all female cast was the problem but also think maybe the four they got wasnt the best choice. The Original Unit acted like they had known each other well while I didnt feel that closeness with the 4 ladies.



Sounds like Super.
That was the first thing I thought when reading the description - there are some major differences like the Star Wars references and torturing the side-kick. But in Super (2010), Ellen Page plays the enamored girl sidekick to Rainn Wilson's homemade vigilante superhero (who is just as brutal as the character NedStark described in his pitch)!

To Ned - some remarkable similarities to an existing film. Super isn't for everyone (despite it's "star" cast, it's got kind of an underground / independent feel and is ethically questionable). It's more than just a spoof on comic book heroes or a "what if they were real?" perspective. It's not Kick-Ass either, but a somewhat darker satire. But based on your pitch, you might like Super.

P.S. For those who've seen it - was it wrong to be attracted to Ellen Page in this when she tries to seduce Rainn while in her costume?